Frustrated tonight

[Guest guest]

I'm feeling frustrated tonight. I feel like I tried to do everything right

today, but I didn't get to enjoy any of my food today.

It was the first day of school and I was so glad to get my boys back into their

routines, but it meant a LOT of extra work for me as well, and timing went

haywire around eating.

Breakfast wasn't too bad, except I was so groggy getting up about 4-5 hours

earlier than I have been. I was very hungry, so I knew it was okay to eat right

away when I had the chance. I got some plain oatmeal cooking in the microwave

and sat down with an hard-boiled egg and some sauce (Miracle Whip, mustard,

pepper, and pickle relish mixed up)to make it like a deviled egg. Yum! But my

difficult tween son showed up then and began making demands, which distracted me

from my oatmeal and eating it became a chore. I somehow managed to notice my

stomach enough to know I could finish the bowl but didn't need anything else. I

had brewed a pot of tea, but barely got going on that, with all the

interruptions. After my sons were off to school, my toddler daughter hadn't

woken up yet, so I went back to bed and gratefully got a nap. When we got up, I

had to feed her and prepare to run my errands. Once we were about ready to go,

I noticed I was caving in. Since I was going to Costco, I figured they would

have samples and that often amounts to a small meal, so I just had a little bit

of melon to tide me over. I was still actively hungry and annoyed that I had to

take meds in to a school nurse before getting to those samples. Then wouldn't

you know it, there were only 2 samples! I got about 2 tablespoons of lemonade

and 2 tortilla chips with tzatziki sauce. Period. By the time I left Costco an

hour later, I was REALLY hungry and annoyed that all the stuff which sounded

good was out because my daughter would want some and is lactose intolerant.

Home and had to race to unload the stuff, which was hard with my sore ankle

getting worse by the minute. Put it away while feeding my toddler and saw that

any minute, a stranger sent by my teenage son's agency would show up and need me

to spend hours training him to care for my disabled son. So I scarfed a couple

of Pop Tarts, which were not as good as I remembered. (My sons are welcome to

the rest of them! I'd rather have toast.) I was still a bit hungry, but drat

it, there was the school bus and the new care provider! I thought this man

would take off after an hour and a half and take my teenage son to his routine

O.T. appointment, but no, he was scared and I had to wake up my toddler, pick up

my tween after school, and take the care provider with me and all the kids to

the appointment. Where my tween began having behavior problems (he has special

needs too, but his are more psychiatric) and by the time we got home I was

thoroughly stressed from the training and my tween son and really really hungry.

Fortunately, I'd warned my husband I'd be late and what we could throw together

for dinner and he had the burger makings about ready for the grill. By the time

we sat down, my tween son had had a major meltdown and things were very tense at

the picnic table. Somehow I managed to stay aware and stop myself from

overeating, but my son had ruined my pleasure and nothing tasted particularly

good and it was just a chore and a strain to eat and not overeat. And now it's

hours later, after yet more drama from my tween, and I am feeling annoyed that

I'm not quite hungry again, because I feel like I deserve dessert after such a

crappy day, now that the kids are in bed finally finally finally! Actually, I'm

getting the first signs and will probably be hungry enough to know when to stop

if I start within an hour, which should just barely make it before bed. But

this was not an optimal day with IE. However, I do think I did well

nevertheless. It just wasn't peaceful and stress-free and I didn't enjoy my

food.

Jane