New to the group

[Guest guest]

Hello Everyone,

My name is Ann and I am a newcomer to the group. I am definitely an

emotional unconscious eater and WAS a professional dieter. I was on weight

watchers on and off for years. I would loose weight and gain it back plus. I

recently decided to see a therapist that focuses on intuitive eating. It has

been challenging to learn how to tune into my body and eat only when i'm hungry

and stop when i'm full/comfortable. Since I am an emotional eater, it gets very

difficult to ignore the persistent " part " of myself that wants to eat and not

feel. I am very excited to be part of the group and connect with others that

are on the same path.

Ann

[Guest guest]

Thank you Katcha and for your words of encouragement and for welcoming me

to group. I was having a moment of emotional eating and before i got myself on

a roll with food I got online to connect. Katcha, i agree " wanting " and

" hungering " are very much alike. I knew tonight that i was " wanting " and i

tried to be kind to myself even when i did some emotional eating. But, i

decided to do something different to interrupt myself from reaching for more

food to fill a need. , honoring and listening to my body is something that

i am trying to work on since i have not done it for years. Diets have always

dictated what i ate and how much i would eat and when i was off my diet, it was

like a free for all. Today had moments of being tuned out of my body and

grabbing for what was at the party to munch on but it's a gift to be able to

catch myself and stop. Now the key is to be gentle with myself and remember

that this journey is a process. I'm trying to get away from black and white

thinking around food and eating. Again, it felt so nice to recieve your

welcoming messages. I am eager to connect with more people on this journey.

Have a great night everyone.

Ann

> >

> > Hello Everyone,

> >

> > My name is Ann and I am a newcomer to the group. I am definitely an

emotional unconscious eater and WAS a professional dieter. I was on weight

watchers on and off for years. I would loose weight and gain it back plus. I

recently decided to see a therapist that focuses on intuitive eating. It has

been challenging to learn how to tune into my body and eat only when i'm hungry

and stop when i'm full/comfortable. Since I am an emotional eater, it gets very

difficult to ignore the persistent " part " of myself that wants to eat and not

feel. I am very excited to be part of the group and connect with others that

are on the same path.

> >

> > Ann

> >

>

[Guest guest]

So lovely to have you - back - Sue. I couldn't deal with the 'rain of email'

this group can produce so I read at the group site and find that to be easier

for me to follow topics as they get discussed. You might want to give that a try

and see if it suits you too.

Waving bye-bye to dieting is so freeing, but also can be a bit insecure making -

at first. I found that just being 'with' the great bunch of fellow IEers that

LIVE here the support I needed to get going on my own IE journey. Glad to have

you along and looking forward to your own insights as well.

BEST to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> Hi, everyone!

>

> I'm new to the group -- actually I was a member for a while earlier, but

> kept changing my mind about what approach to take to my compulsive

> eating. My subscription was on an e-mail address that I hardly ended up

> using at all, so the posts kind of got lost in the shuffle of my life.

> Now I'd like to participate in the group and really commit myself to the

> Intuitive Eating approach. I read the book a long time ago and am

> re-reading it. It really makes the most sense for me of all the many

> approaches I've tried.

>

> I've spent my whole adult life either trying to follow the dictates of

> the food police or rebelling against them. Recently I told my therapist

> that I'm just dropping the whole thing -- the food rules, the guilt

> (dropping it is easier said than done), the desperation and despair, and

> hopefully eventually the self-destructive rebellion. I've just had it

> with the struggle. The worst thing about it is, when I think about it, I

> know the whole reason I care so much is about wanting to look a certain

> way -- a way that I've never looked, even when I was thin, and a way I

> certainly never can look now that I've reached 65 years of age! It's

> kind of insane, but it's what our culture teaches girls, and I think in

> some ways it's worse than ever these days. I'm just afraid that the

> battle against child (and adult) obesity is going to result in more

> shame and desperation than healthy changes.

>

> Anyway, I'm glad to be here and am looking forward to being part of the

> group.

>

> Sue

> Portland, Maine, US

>

[Guest guest]

So lovely to have you - back - Sue. I couldn't deal with the 'rain of email'

this group can produce so I read at the group site and find that to be easier

for me to follow topics as they get discussed. You might want to give that a try

and see if it suits you too.

Waving bye-bye to dieting is so freeing, but also can be a bit insecure making -

at first. I found that just being 'with' the great bunch of fellow IEers that

LIVE here the support I needed to get going on my own IE journey. Glad to have

you along and looking forward to your own insights as well.

BEST to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> Hi, everyone!

>

> I'm new to the group -- actually I was a member for a while earlier, but

> kept changing my mind about what approach to take to my compulsive

> eating. My subscription was on an e-mail address that I hardly ended up

> using at all, so the posts kind of got lost in the shuffle of my life.

> Now I'd like to participate in the group and really commit myself to the

> Intuitive Eating approach. I read the book a long time ago and am

> re-reading it. It really makes the most sense for me of all the many

> approaches I've tried.

>

> I've spent my whole adult life either trying to follow the dictates of

> the food police or rebelling against them. Recently I told my therapist

> that I'm just dropping the whole thing -- the food rules, the guilt

> (dropping it is easier said than done), the desperation and despair, and

> hopefully eventually the self-destructive rebellion. I've just had it

> with the struggle. The worst thing about it is, when I think about it, I

> know the whole reason I care so much is about wanting to look a certain

> way -- a way that I've never looked, even when I was thin, and a way I

> certainly never can look now that I've reached 65 years of age! It's

> kind of insane, but it's what our culture teaches girls, and I think in

> some ways it's worse than ever these days. I'm just afraid that the

> battle against child (and adult) obesity is going to result in more

> shame and desperation than healthy changes.

>

> Anyway, I'm glad to be here and am looking forward to being part of the

> group.

>

> Sue

> Portland, Maine, US

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Katcha! Yes, I'm kind of scared of gaining weight, which

I know will happen, at least at first. I think being in a group of

supportive people on the same journey will help a lot. Thanks for

the suggestion about reading the group site -- that's a good idea.

I'll see how it goes with the e-mails -- I may need to keep getting

them as reminders!

Thanks again!

Sue

So lovely to have you - back - Sue. I couldn't deal with

the 'rain of email' this group can produce so I read at

the group site and find that to be easier for me to follow

topics as they get discussed. You might want to give that

a try and see if it suits you too.

Waving bye-bye to dieting is so freeing, but also can be a

bit insecure making - at first. I found that just being

'with' the great bunch of fellow IEers that LIVE here the

support I needed to get going on my own IE journey. Glad

to have you along and looking forward to your own insights

as well.

BEST to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> Hi, everyone!

>

> I'm new to the group -- actually I was a member for a

while earlier, but

> kept changing my mind about what approach to take to

my compulsive

> eating. My subscription was on an e-mail address that

I hardly ended up

> using at all, so the posts kind of got lost in the

shuffle of my life.

> Now I'd like to participate in the group and really

commit myself to the

> Intuitive Eating approach. I read the book a long

time ago and am

> re-reading it. It really makes the most sense for me

of all the many

> approaches I've tried.

>

> I've spent my whole adult life either trying to

follow the dictates of

> the food police or rebelling against them. Recently I

told my therapist

> that I'm just dropping the whole thing -- the food

rules, the guilt

> (dropping it is easier said than done), the

desperation and despair, and

> hopefully eventually the self-destructive rebellion.

I've just had it

> with the struggle. The worst thing about it is, when

I think about it, I

> know the whole reason I care so much is about wanting

to look a certain

> way -- a way that I've never looked, even when I was

thin, and a way I

> certainly never can look now that I've reached 65

years of age! It's

> kind of insane, but it's what our culture teaches

girls, and I think in

> some ways it's worse than ever these days. I'm just

afraid that the

> battle against child (and adult) obesity is going to

result in more

> shame and desperation than healthy changes.

>

> Anyway, I'm glad to be here and am looking forward to

being part of the

> group.

>

> Sue

> Portland, Maine, US

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Katcha! Yes, I'm kind of scared of gaining weight, which

I know will happen, at least at first. I think being in a group of

supportive people on the same journey will help a lot. Thanks for

the suggestion about reading the group site -- that's a good idea.

I'll see how it goes with the e-mails -- I may need to keep getting

them as reminders!

Thanks again!

Sue

So lovely to have you - back - Sue. I couldn't deal with

the 'rain of email' this group can produce so I read at

the group site and find that to be easier for me to follow

topics as they get discussed. You might want to give that

a try and see if it suits you too.

Waving bye-bye to dieting is so freeing, but also can be a

bit insecure making - at first. I found that just being

'with' the great bunch of fellow IEers that LIVE here the

support I needed to get going on my own IE journey. Glad

to have you along and looking forward to your own insights

as well.

BEST to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> Hi, everyone!

>

> I'm new to the group -- actually I was a member for a

while earlier, but

> kept changing my mind about what approach to take to

my compulsive

> eating. My subscription was on an e-mail address that

I hardly ended up

> using at all, so the posts kind of got lost in the

shuffle of my life.

> Now I'd like to participate in the group and really

commit myself to the

> Intuitive Eating approach. I read the book a long

time ago and am

> re-reading it. It really makes the most sense for me

of all the many

> approaches I've tried.

>

> I've spent my whole adult life either trying to

follow the dictates of

> the food police or rebelling against them. Recently I

told my therapist

> that I'm just dropping the whole thing -- the food

rules, the guilt

> (dropping it is easier said than done), the

desperation and despair, and

> hopefully eventually the self-destructive rebellion.

I've just had it

> with the struggle. The worst thing about it is, when

I think about it, I

> know the whole reason I care so much is about wanting

to look a certain

> way -- a way that I've never looked, even when I was

thin, and a way I

> certainly never can look now that I've reached 65

years of age! It's

> kind of insane, but it's what our culture teaches

girls, and I think in

> some ways it's worse than ever these days. I'm just

afraid that the

> battle against child (and adult) obesity is going to

result in more

> shame and desperation than healthy changes.

>

> Anyway, I'm glad to be here and am looking forward to

being part of the

> group.

>

> Sue

> Portland, Maine, US

>

[Guest guest]

Welcome Robin :-) I am happy for you that you are gifting yourself IE. It may

seem a 'radical' rebound from dieting, but really I see it as a return to what

my body always was meant to be.

The determination that serves you so well in your distance running can be

applied here - but a lot more gently I do hope :-) I like the idea of IE as a

journey, not a goal which is 'reached' at X point. As you know from your

distance running, pacing one's self is important. If you zip off the starting

line and poop out within the first mile you may never finish the race or only be

able to do so in fits and starts etc. May you have a delightful 'stroll' when

you need it and bursts of delight from baby steps too!

Regarding Healthier Outcomes, Gillian - who is this list owner - has all sorts

of options you can choose from - group discussions, personal coaching etc. I

felt I got a 'boost' start by participating in one of her teleconference groups.

Your mileage may vary ;-) I'm sure she would also say that participating here is

a very good idea too. There are a couple of members here who are getting extra

coaching from her. I'll let them feedback for themselves on that.

BEST to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>Hello everyone,

>My name is Robin and I've been lurking around reading your posts for the past

few days since I've joined. I thought it is time for me to step out and

introduce myself and share a little about why I'm here.

>I'm 44 years old, married, have 3 teenagers and the responsibilities that go

along with it! I found out about Intuitive Eating when I was on a business trip

over the summer. The front page of People Magazine had a picture of one of the

American Idol singers who had been suffering from and in recovery for an eating

disorder. I picked up the magazine and read about her journey, which included

recovery with Intuitive Eating. That prompted me to go out and buy the book.

For the first few weeks, I felt like the weight of the world had been lifted

from my shoulders. Yet, skip ahead another few weeks and I found myself looking

through new diet books again. Since that time, I actually bought 3 books, all

related to low carb eating. And then I found myself back in the thick of things

again. I believe I've had food addictions since around age 6 or 7. And I'm

sure you can guess the rest....first time at Weight Watchers at 13 years old,

and every single diet, diet pill, supplements, etc. known to man since then.

Yet, here I sit at 44 years old, having dieted (and binged, of course) for the

past 30 years and I'm still over weight. I am 5'4 and 1/2. I weight somewhere

around 150. And here is the real kicker.... I'm a runner. A distance runner. I

usually run 3 days during the week, about 6 miles each run. Saturdays, I run

with a running club, of which I am the Program Director. Our shortest " long "

run is 10 miles. When in training for a marathon, the runs go all the way up to

26 - 28 miles. I am so grateful to having running - I feel good about myself

when I run. On non running days, I work out with weights and do speed walking

at the gym. My husband and I go to the gym together and he is very supportive.

Yet, I have this inner turmoil about my weight and I realize that I really need

help. I'm so wrapped up in negative thinking about my body and my weight and

food - of course, Thanksgiving is a challenge and I may be feeling the pain of

this sickness a little more than usual today.

>ANYWAY, I didn't mean to ramble like that. I am considering signing up for one

of the online coaching programs through Healthier Outcomes. I was wondering if

any of you have done this or are doing this now? I'd like to hear your

experience.

>I the meantime, I have gathered up all of the diet books and put everything in

the garage in a black bag for the garbage men. Now I will go back and re-read

the book. I'm nervous about having to give up my addiction to coping with life

through food. But truthfully, I can see that I have just wasted so much of my

life being obsessed with what to eat next, how to stop eating, how fat I've

felt, what to wear because nothing fits, who is thinking I'm fat, OMG! I would

have SO MUCH time every day to do other things!

>So, thanks for the opportunity to rant. I'm looking forward to getting to know

everyone and participating in this group.

>Robin

[Guest guest]

Thank you, Sandarah! Yes, those old pictures of my younger, thinner

self -- I find them painful to look at. I'm having trouble accepting

getting older. It's weird, because I admire and respect other older

women, but I have so much trouble accepting myself as an older

person. I'm working on it in therapy, and I think making peace with

food will help.

Sue

Welcome, Sue. I'll look forward to reading your posts. I

just turned 67 and still have those young, thin, beautiful

perfect pictures to live down to. And diet rebellion, oh

my. Good time to join. Sandarah

[Guest guest]

Hi, Sue! Here's what jumped out at me in your post:"The worst thing about it is, when I think about it, I know the whole reason I care so much is about wanting to look a certain way -- a way that I've never looked, even when I was thin, and a way I certainly never can look now that I've reached 65 years of age! It's kind of insane, but it's what our culture teaches girls, and I think in some ways it's worse than ever these days."This is one of the issues of reality I'm struggling with. I'm 60. I'm never going to look like a young woman again. Not only have I decided to quit subscribing to the thin-is-pretty mindset, I'm letting my colored hair grow out. This is what a 60-year-old woman looks like, world. This is

what you look like at 60, Ellie.Ellie

I've spent my whole adult life either trying to follow the dictates of the food police or rebelling against them. Recently I told my therapist that I'm just dropping the whole thing -- the food rules, the guilt (dropping it is easier said than done), the desperation and despair, and hopefully eventually the self-destructive rebellion. I've just had it with the struggle.

The worst thing about it is, when I think about it, I know the whole reason I care so much is about wanting to look a certain way -- a way that I've never looked, even when I was thin, and a way I certainly never can look now that I've reached 65 years of age! It's kind of insane, but it's what our culture teaches girls, and I think in some ways it's worse than ever these days. I'm just afraid that the battle against child (and adult) obesity is going to result in more shame and desperation than healthy changes.Anyway, I'm glad to be here and am looking forward to being part of the group.SuePortland, Maine, US

[Guest guest]

I can think of a few older women still portrayed as sexy: Diane Keaton, Meryl

Streep, Diane Lane and I think there are a few others.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless Phone

--- Original Message ---

Sent: January 10, 2012 1/10/12

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: New to the group

 

I think many of us are marginalized in our culture, whether it is because of

weight or gender or age. Older women, especially, are given a hard time. Just

look at our Hollywood movies. A woman over 40 portrayed as sexy or appealing?

Forget it, she's gross and old. Such women are exceptions, not rules. A male

friend of mine said the other day, " no one wants to see a 40-year-old woman

strip. " Great. Thanks. Glad that we are only appealing for such a short time and

then it's into the trash bin with us. I say we forget apologizing for who we are

and accentuate our beauty, no matter the age.

 

Mimi

Subject: Re: New to the group

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Date: Friday, January 6, 2012, 4:27 PM

 

Hi, Ellie!

Thanks for your response to my post!

It's kind of painful to embody a stereotype, and I feel that I do. It's the

stereotype of the fat, gray-haired middle-aged (well, the " old " side of middle

aged!) woman. It does a number on my self-esteem, which isn't great to begin

with. I'm lucky to have a therapist who understands the struggle with food very

well (she was bulemic years ago) and who used mindfulness to help her get to a

balanced and healthy outlook on the issue. She's good at helping me work through

these feelings of unattractiveness and unworthiness, which have been made so

much worse by being older and overweight.

What's hard, too, is giving up the idea that I can look young and attractive by

society's standards if I only lose weight. As you said, Ellie, I'm never going

to look like a young woman again. The ironic thing is that when I look at other

older women, I see their beauty. But I don't see my own. Part of me actually

likes my gray hair -- but I just realized that I like it as gray hair on a

young-looking person (wishful thinking about myself!) -- not gray hair on an

older-looking person. I dislike thinking that my gray hair automatically slots

me into the category of " old, " in the view of younger people -- and therefore

invisible as a person to be taken seriously.

I'm using gentle and soothing self-talk to help me counter these negative

feelings.

I've decided that I'm going to try to post here every day. I get so much out of

everyone's posts. It's kind of like when I got into AA -- I'm a sober alcoholic

-- and felt immediately at home. I feel that all of you know what I'm talking

about.

Sue