Guest guest Posted January 16, 2011 Report Share Posted January 16, 2011 One last one...I needed to share. The last traces of anger lifting up from somewhere and I let them out. I wrote this back in 2009. Seeing what I saw, I guess I had to reconcile the anger and stand up and stop being a victim. As painful as the stocking was that ensued, it was so incredibly liberating as you can well imagine. Mommy's Don't Hurt My whole life it seems, Our world has been about you... And what you need and what you wanted. Our two tiny lives in the balance, simply collateral damage. We were a burden to you, we often felt... As we watched your life spin out of control. The dark nights as small children we spent alone... Unsupervised while you went to " work. " You were always angry and frustrated... Drinking with friends, Chasing horrible men who never liked us, Telling us how horrible our father was. The words you said may have been true, But he wasn't any worse off than you. You neglected and destroyed yourself time and again As we watched bewildered and helpless. We found a way to get away... Escape from your domination and control. But life with dad wasn't all that much easier. He was miserable too and just wanted to drink it all away. As we grew and felt a sense of anger... The hate mail began to come. What horrible children were we... Not to write you wherever you moved around to. We didn't drop our new lives whenever you came back into town. You didn't know how we missed you... Wished you could watch our school shows... After school games and competitions that were important to us. But we knew what you said... When we didn't drop our lives to run to you, Whenever you blew unexpectedly back into town, We were supposed be silent about your broken promises. Then as adults who grew independent of you. We tried to maintain civility, choke down our childish anger... Let by gone's be by gone's... Consider our pain water under the bridge. Then you became needier and more demanding... And we became your psychological doormats. You some how felt entitled to dump on us emotionally, Beg us for money, a roof, whatever it was that you needed. Then more scathing letters came... Horribly wounding us to the core. As adults tired of being doormats, we called you on your transgressions... And you denied ever writing the horrible words we hold and can see in our hands. You're a miserable and horrible person. It's so sad to me that you must fantasize that you're a good mother... All the while you seek to destroy the lives you brought into this world. Did no one ever teach you that Mommy's don't hurt their children? The kind of abuse you inflict is the worst kind. You attempt to psychologically batter and destroy. You throw horrible untruths at us, you even called me a bitch yesterday All because I made you leave so you couldn't hurt me and my family any more. I'm now a mother who came out mostly unscathed. The rules I live by is Mommy's don't hurt... Mommy's don't lean on their children... Mommy's don't take every shred of happiness and spit it in their children's faces. Mommy's are not entitled to love from their children they didn't give first... Mommy's are not entitled to respect they didn't first seek to earn... Mommy's are not allowed to abuse their children for any reason ever... And then expect them to stand their in loving adoration. We had a biological mother... But you were very rarely a mother. You never knew how to be... We forgive you for that. But don't think for a minute you should mistake our forgiveness... For an open door of domination, manipulation and pain. You are not entitled to love, especially when all you give is hatred. You are not entitled to kindness when all you deliver is abuse. Go about you business like you always wanted. Care free, child free, obligation free. We're not your doormats any more. We love you but want you to leave us alone. Don't come back until you've learned how to be nice, Until you've learned to become a human being, Until you've healed your pain on your own. You're a Mommy who can't hurt us any more! ©2009 Jaie Hart Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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