Re: Re: minimizing minimizing

January 21, 2011

That's interesting you mentioned that--my family scrupulously tried not to

make a record of fada's rage, because it would upset our family's " image " to

the public, and he would totally deny he was like that.

But one time, he went on a rant during my then 2 yr old brother's birthday

party, and my oldest little brother was still videotaping everything. He

didn't turn it off or pause the recording. He was too afraid to do something

like that, because that would imply that what he's doing is wrong. Catch 22.

and Fada liked having family watching-our-home-videos times, and when we

watched the birthday party video a few weeks later...we all just sat through

it, frozen, afraid to make a move, and held our bated breath wondering if

Fada would see it, recognize he has a problem, and magically change and fart

sunshine and rainbows.

Obviously, that didn't happen. He didn't make us watch all the videos all

the time after that, and I think he was far more careful after that, and was

" tense " -happy instead of letting his emotions go.

Oh wow...memories started coming back about that.

Holly

On Fri, Jan 21, 2011 at 1:37 AM, slingshot2hell wrote:

>

> RE recording the abuse, I remember once as a kid I bought a cheap small

> tape recorder. My nada had this thing that after a screaming rage she would

> totally deny it ever happened. If I tried to tell her the crazy things she

> said she would just keep insisting it wasn't true, that *I* must be crazy.

> If I tried to tell my dad, he would say it couldn't have been THAT bad. So

> one time I recorded her during her rage. Somehow she found out, I don't

> remember if I tried to play the recording for her afterwards or what. She

> went NUTS. She smashed the recorder in a rage and went through my room

> claiming to be looking for other recording devices and broke anything

> electronic she could find, throwing the pieces at me. She told me to NEVER

> record her again - and I never did. I don't even have a picture of her.

>

> Anyway I can't imagine the result if I POSTED IT ONLINE. I might not have

> survived the aftermath.

>

> Casey

>

> > >

> > > Ah! I didn't catch that part, that the enabling male voice was not the

> > dad, but the current live-in boyfriend of the enraged, screaming nada. I

> > don't want to listen to it again, so, I will trust your assessment.

> > >

> > > I think that we are in a truly miraculous new era RE the ability to

> > record and share information via the Internet. When such abusive

> > behaviors can be recorded and shared with millions of other people

> > online, it sheds a new light and (hopefully) will give a new perspective

> > to the general public RE what the children of the mentally ill have to

> > endure, sometimes on a daily basis. Sometimes, several times a day.

> > >

> > > These out-of-control screaming rages are horrible enough for anyone to

> > endure, but they can completely traumatize a small child, send them into

> > shock and dissociation. Particularly when the screaming is accompanied

> > by physical abuse. I was slapped around, shaken, hit and even beaten

> > with a leather belt while being screamed at like that.

> > >

> > > I hope that such true-life recorded incidents will result in more

> > compassion for the children of the mentally ill, and result in more

> > children being rescued from such abuse.

> > >

> > > -Annie

> > >

> >

>

January 21, 2011