Guest guest Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 , I know exactly how you feel about wanting a normal relationship with food. I want the same. I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but I'm just now getting back into IE. I am sure we'll learn a lot from this group. Wishing you the very best in your journey with IE! Ann > > I have always attached my self worth to my weight. When I lost weight I felt great- bought nice clothes, took great care of myself, threw out all my fat clothes because I would NEVER wear them again...this time. > > Everytime I gained the weight back (and more) I was stuck with no clothes, not caring to do hair, makeup, etc. > > This morning I took a long look at myself in the mirror and am feeling panic-y and torn internally. I look terrible and am disgusting to myself. The last weight gain has changed my body shape considerably and has scared me. > > My initial immediate thought was DIET! Get this weight off ASAP! > (I know in my head that this cannot happen again. I have not figured out WHY I keep gaining weight back, although the IE book has given me some good ideas). > > I guess what I'm asking is how do you guys deal with feelings like this? > I am wanting a normal realationship with food, but I also don't want to look like this anymore. ugh! > > (BTW- I was watching a biggest loser special last night. Bob Harper said that keeping weight off " is a stuggle everyday " and that " everybody who wants to be thin has this struggle. " I don't want every day to be a struggle!!!! I just want to be a normal weight and not have to think about food every second! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 , I know exactly how you feel about wanting a normal relationship with food. I want the same. I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but I'm just now getting back into IE. I am sure we'll learn a lot from this group. Wishing you the very best in your journey with IE! Ann > > I have always attached my self worth to my weight. When I lost weight I felt great- bought nice clothes, took great care of myself, threw out all my fat clothes because I would NEVER wear them again...this time. > > Everytime I gained the weight back (and more) I was stuck with no clothes, not caring to do hair, makeup, etc. > > This morning I took a long look at myself in the mirror and am feeling panic-y and torn internally. I look terrible and am disgusting to myself. The last weight gain has changed my body shape considerably and has scared me. > > My initial immediate thought was DIET! Get this weight off ASAP! > (I know in my head that this cannot happen again. I have not figured out WHY I keep gaining weight back, although the IE book has given me some good ideas). > > I guess what I'm asking is how do you guys deal with feelings like this? > I am wanting a normal realationship with food, but I also don't want to look like this anymore. ugh! > > (BTW- I was watching a biggest loser special last night. Bob Harper said that keeping weight off " is a stuggle everyday " and that " everybody who wants to be thin has this struggle. " I don't want every day to be a struggle!!!! I just want to be a normal weight and not have to think about food every second! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 , I know exactly how you feel about wanting a normal relationship with food. I want the same. I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but I'm just now getting back into IE. I am sure we'll learn a lot from this group. Wishing you the very best in your journey with IE! Ann > > I have always attached my self worth to my weight. When I lost weight I felt great- bought nice clothes, took great care of myself, threw out all my fat clothes because I would NEVER wear them again...this time. > > Everytime I gained the weight back (and more) I was stuck with no clothes, not caring to do hair, makeup, etc. > > This morning I took a long look at myself in the mirror and am feeling panic-y and torn internally. I look terrible and am disgusting to myself. The last weight gain has changed my body shape considerably and has scared me. > > My initial immediate thought was DIET! Get this weight off ASAP! > (I know in my head that this cannot happen again. I have not figured out WHY I keep gaining weight back, although the IE book has given me some good ideas). > > I guess what I'm asking is how do you guys deal with feelings like this? > I am wanting a normal realationship with food, but I also don't want to look like this anymore. ugh! > > (BTW- I was watching a biggest loser special last night. Bob Harper said that keeping weight off " is a stuggle everyday " and that " everybody who wants to be thin has this struggle. " I don't want every day to be a struggle!!!! I just want to be a normal weight and not have to think about food every second! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 I always attached more self worth to my weight and appearance than anything else in life (and was frankly a little ashamed of being so superficial). Still and all, it's been very hard to give up the illusions around that set of values as it was such a driving force for so long. In fact I grieved openly about it on this site a lot initially. Waah. Part of the IE journey is the push/pull to go back to dieting. Like any other addiction, dieting is the call of the siren - and it's everywhere. So, the thinking that goes along with the 'I will diet my way into a new and better life', requires regular reality checks because the media is relentless with its thin = better message. I guess watching shows like Biggest Loser while trying to " get " IE is something akin to somebody new in AA going to a bar just to smell the drinks - which would mostly result in becoming really thirsty. (Laughing...) And, truth is, many of those poor people will face terrible public humiliation around any future weight gain. Ouch! My self-hate around my weight-loss-expanded body size has significantly diminished from my start with IE (8/11) and when I have one of those negative reactions to how I look, I'm usually pretty good at catching myself. Sometimes though it's hard because the old standards of comparison are pretty deeply implanted in my psyche and I come from a family of fat haters. And chronic dieters, of course. So, yeah, for now I have to work through my issues around not looking the way I want to but truth is, I can also see the losses resulting from my fixation on my appearance all these years. I ignored a whole lot of important things while focussing on my latest diet, my latest gain or loss, what clothes to wear this place or that - really, really I wasted a lot of precious time and energy on those very insignificant pieces of life. Not that any of it mattered, really. Probably not the answer you wanted but it's my best shot. Sandarah > > I have always attached my self worth to my weight. When I lost weight I felt great- bought nice clothes, took great care of myself, threw out all my fat clothes because I would NEVER wear them again...this time. > > Everytime I gained the weight back (and more) I was stuck with no clothes, not caring to do hair, makeup, etc. > > This morning I took a long look at myself in the mirror and am feeling panic-y and torn internally. I look terrible and am disgusting to myself. The last weight gain has changed my body shape considerably and has scared me. > > My initial immediate thought was DIET! Get this weight off ASAP! > (I know in my head that this cannot happen again. I have not figured out WHY I keep gaining weight back, although the IE book has given me some good ideas). > > I guess what I'm asking is how do you guys deal with feelings like this? > I am wanting a normal realationship with food, but I also don't want to look like this anymore. ugh! > > (BTW- I was watching a biggest loser special last night. Bob Harper said that keeping weight off " is a stuggle everyday " and that " everybody who wants to be thin has this struggle. " I don't want every day to be a struggle!!!! I just want to be a normal weight and not have to think about food every second! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 I always attached more self worth to my weight and appearance than anything else in life (and was frankly a little ashamed of being so superficial). Still and all, it's been very hard to give up the illusions around that set of values as it was such a driving force for so long. In fact I grieved openly about it on this site a lot initially. Waah. Part of the IE journey is the push/pull to go back to dieting. Like any other addiction, dieting is the call of the siren - and it's everywhere. So, the thinking that goes along with the 'I will diet my way into a new and better life', requires regular reality checks because the media is relentless with its thin = better message. I guess watching shows like Biggest Loser while trying to " get " IE is something akin to somebody new in AA going to a bar just to smell the drinks - which would mostly result in becoming really thirsty. (Laughing...) And, truth is, many of those poor people will face terrible public humiliation around any future weight gain. Ouch! My self-hate around my weight-loss-expanded body size has significantly diminished from my start with IE (8/11) and when I have one of those negative reactions to how I look, I'm usually pretty good at catching myself. Sometimes though it's hard because the old standards of comparison are pretty deeply implanted in my psyche and I come from a family of fat haters. And chronic dieters, of course. So, yeah, for now I have to work through my issues around not looking the way I want to but truth is, I can also see the losses resulting from my fixation on my appearance all these years. I ignored a whole lot of important things while focussing on my latest diet, my latest gain or loss, what clothes to wear this place or that - really, really I wasted a lot of precious time and energy on those very insignificant pieces of life. Not that any of it mattered, really. Probably not the answer you wanted but it's my best shot. Sandarah > > I have always attached my self worth to my weight. When I lost weight I felt great- bought nice clothes, took great care of myself, threw out all my fat clothes because I would NEVER wear them again...this time. > > Everytime I gained the weight back (and more) I was stuck with no clothes, not caring to do hair, makeup, etc. > > This morning I took a long look at myself in the mirror and am feeling panic-y and torn internally. I look terrible and am disgusting to myself. The last weight gain has changed my body shape considerably and has scared me. > > My initial immediate thought was DIET! Get this weight off ASAP! > (I know in my head that this cannot happen again. I have not figured out WHY I keep gaining weight back, although the IE book has given me some good ideas). > > I guess what I'm asking is how do you guys deal with feelings like this? > I am wanting a normal realationship with food, but I also don't want to look like this anymore. ugh! > > (BTW- I was watching a biggest loser special last night. Bob Harper said that keeping weight off " is a stuggle everyday " and that " everybody who wants to be thin has this struggle. " I don't want every day to be a struggle!!!! I just want to be a normal weight and not have to think about food every second! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 I always attached more self worth to my weight and appearance than anything else in life (and was frankly a little ashamed of being so superficial). Still and all, it's been very hard to give up the illusions around that set of values as it was such a driving force for so long. In fact I grieved openly about it on this site a lot initially. Waah. Part of the IE journey is the push/pull to go back to dieting. Like any other addiction, dieting is the call of the siren - and it's everywhere. So, the thinking that goes along with the 'I will diet my way into a new and better life', requires regular reality checks because the media is relentless with its thin = better message. I guess watching shows like Biggest Loser while trying to " get " IE is something akin to somebody new in AA going to a bar just to smell the drinks - which would mostly result in becoming really thirsty. (Laughing...) And, truth is, many of those poor people will face terrible public humiliation around any future weight gain. Ouch! My self-hate around my weight-loss-expanded body size has significantly diminished from my start with IE (8/11) and when I have one of those negative reactions to how I look, I'm usually pretty good at catching myself. Sometimes though it's hard because the old standards of comparison are pretty deeply implanted in my psyche and I come from a family of fat haters. And chronic dieters, of course. So, yeah, for now I have to work through my issues around not looking the way I want to but truth is, I can also see the losses resulting from my fixation on my appearance all these years. I ignored a whole lot of important things while focussing on my latest diet, my latest gain or loss, what clothes to wear this place or that - really, really I wasted a lot of precious time and energy on those very insignificant pieces of life. Not that any of it mattered, really. Probably not the answer you wanted but it's my best shot. Sandarah > > I have always attached my self worth to my weight. When I lost weight I felt great- bought nice clothes, took great care of myself, threw out all my fat clothes because I would NEVER wear them again...this time. > > Everytime I gained the weight back (and more) I was stuck with no clothes, not caring to do hair, makeup, etc. > > This morning I took a long look at myself in the mirror and am feeling panic-y and torn internally. I look terrible and am disgusting to myself. The last weight gain has changed my body shape considerably and has scared me. > > My initial immediate thought was DIET! Get this weight off ASAP! > (I know in my head that this cannot happen again. I have not figured out WHY I keep gaining weight back, although the IE book has given me some good ideas). > > I guess what I'm asking is how do you guys deal with feelings like this? > I am wanting a normal realationship with food, but I also don't want to look like this anymore. ugh! > > (BTW- I was watching a biggest loser special last night. Bob Harper said that keeping weight off " is a stuggle everyday " and that " everybody who wants to be thin has this struggle. " I don't want every day to be a struggle!!!! I just want to be a normal weight and not have to think about food every second! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 28, 2011 Report Share Posted December 28, 2011 Sandarah, I totally get what you are saying. I have hidden from seeing old friends because I didn't want them to see me like this, not gone with my husband to his Christmas party because I didn't want him to be known as the guy with the fat wife, not bought nice clothes because I do not deserve them like this, and God forbid if someone wants to take my picture!! As time goes on, I realize I have spent years of my life with this mentality and it is so sad! I am wasting my life hiding. I am glad you responded with your struggle when you started which seems just like what I am going through as a noob. I am sure I will have other moments of panic before I " get " this fully. Although I have long ago understood I will never look like a victorias secret model, what I want is to be comfortable in my body. I liked your Biggest Loser/AA analogy. Funny! Val > > > > I have always attached my self worth to my weight. When I lost weight I felt great- bought nice clothes, took great care of myself, threw out all my fat clothes because I would NEVER wear them again...this time. > > > > Everytime I gained the weight back (and more) I was stuck with no clothes, not caring to do hair, makeup, etc. > > > > This morning I took a long look at myself in the mirror and am feeling panic-y and torn internally. I look terrible and am disgusting to myself. The last weight gain has changed my body shape considerably and has scared me. > > > > My initial immediate thought was DIET! Get this weight off ASAP! > > (I know in my head that this cannot happen again. I have not figured out WHY I keep gaining weight back, although the IE book has given me some good ideas). > > > > I guess what I'm asking is how do you guys deal with feelings like this? > > I am wanting a normal realationship with food, but I also don't want to look like this anymore. ugh! > > > > (BTW- I was watching a biggest loser special last night. Bob Harper said that keeping weight off " is a stuggle everyday " and that " everybody who wants to be thin has this struggle. " I don't want every day to be a struggle!!!! I just want to be a normal weight and not have to think about food every second! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 5, 2012 Report Share Posted January 5, 2012 I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on "The Biggest Loser" because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater "struggles everyday" with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. Mimi Subject: Re: struggle!!To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Wednesday, December 28, 2011, 7:19 PM , I know exactly how you feel about wanting a normal relationship with food. I want the same. I wish I had some words of wisdom for you, but I'm just now getting back into IE. I am sure we'll learn a lot from this group. Wishing you the very best in your journey with IE!Ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on "The Biggest Loser" because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater "struggles everyday" with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. Mimi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on "The Biggest Loser" because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater "struggles everyday" with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. Mimi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 There's a website you can go to that shows what each BL constestant weighed at the end of the show, and what their current weights are. Not good...almost without exception they've gained. Also not surprising, is it, from someone who's walked in those shoes? Sara > > Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. >  > I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. >  > Ann > > > ________________________________ > > To: IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM > Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! > > >  > > I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on " The Biggest Loser " because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater " struggles everyday " with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. > > Mimi > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 There's a website you can go to that shows what each BL constestant weighed at the end of the show, and what their current weights are. Not good...almost without exception they've gained. Also not surprising, is it, from someone who's walked in those shoes? Sara > > Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. >  > I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. >  > Ann > > > ________________________________ > > To: IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM > Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! > > >  > > I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on " The Biggest Loser " because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater " struggles everyday " with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. > > Mimi > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 I'm pretty unhappy with how much I weigh (or rather how abundant my flesh is, since I don't happen to know how much I weigh), which seems particularly cruel ad,ter seven years of being at or near my natural weight, without any struggle. But I am not there now, I am here, and here is what I have to deal with, and I have absolutely no desire to engage in that struggle. I have way better things to do with my time and energy, and I am hoping hoping hoping that I can learn to nurture myself in such a way that I do end up going back to my natural weight, but since this ballooning happened because of dieting, I am even more deathly afraid of dieting than I am of being substantially overweight. If one bout of dieting caused me to gain thirty plus pounds (and become obsessed with food) what would happen the next time? It's been interesting to watch how my self-talk has changed as I have gained weight this past year and a half. It's not good. It reminds me of how I talked to myself when I was married, and I thought I was long past that. Tilley > > Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. >  > I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. >  > Ann > > > ________________________________ > > To: IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM > Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! > > >  > > I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on " The Biggest Loser " because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater " struggles everyday " with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. > > Mimi > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 Hear hear Tilley!! I especially appreciated what you noted - " but since this ballooning happened because of dieting, I am even more deathly afraid of dieting than I am of being substantially overweight. " IE is that fork in the road where one leaves dieting behind. IE doesn't promise a walk through roses, honey & milk, but it won't lead you astray like dieting does! Good journeying and happy to be sharing the IE trail with you too. ehugs, Katcha IEing since March 2007 > > > > Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. > >  > > I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. > >  > > Ann > > > > > > ________________________________ > > From: Incigul Sayman <incisayman@> > > To: IntuitiveEating_Support > > Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM > > Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! > > > > > >  > > > > I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on " The Biggest Loser " because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater " struggles everyday " with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. > > > > Mimi > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 " It reminds me of how I talked to myself when I was married, and I thought I was long past that. " I'm sorry to hear that Tilley; I hope your self-talk hasn't gone downhill in response to IE. I find that my self talk needs regular vigilence to catch so that I can re-frame or re-educate myself regarding this or that. Every so often I'll find some big old chunk of distorted thinking that is so important to come awake to and challenge. IE is about far more than just food - it's all those messages, all those reactions, all that self-hate due to body size and maybe gender.... this is such a big undertaking. And for those of us who've mainly only had the fork as a means of coping with life, very difficult to re-gear our entire way of living. Can you identify what's happening that's similar to your marriage that is bringing you down? Or are you telling yourself you're a failure on IE because of weight gain? Is there some part of your IE process that is particularly stuck and is leading to weight gain, or the fear of weight gain? I just wondered today how much longer my weight was going to have to climb until I reached a place where I could start to ease up on eating and move from fear and control to choice. It's delicate work, trying to find a way to work with a psyche that's been battered around and ignored for so long. Love your posts; hope your self talk includes how valued you are on this site. Sandarah > > > > Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. > >  > > I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. > >  > > Ann > > > > > > ________________________________ > > From: Incigul Sayman <incisayman@> > > To: IntuitiveEating_Support > > Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM > > Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! > > > > > >  > > > > I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on " The Biggest Loser " because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater " struggles everyday " with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. > > > > Mimi > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2012 Report Share Posted January 6, 2012 " It reminds me of how I talked to myself when I was married, and I thought I was long past that. " I'm sorry to hear that Tilley; I hope your self-talk hasn't gone downhill in response to IE. I find that my self talk needs regular vigilence to catch so that I can re-frame or re-educate myself regarding this or that. Every so often I'll find some big old chunk of distorted thinking that is so important to come awake to and challenge. IE is about far more than just food - it's all those messages, all those reactions, all that self-hate due to body size and maybe gender.... this is such a big undertaking. And for those of us who've mainly only had the fork as a means of coping with life, very difficult to re-gear our entire way of living. Can you identify what's happening that's similar to your marriage that is bringing you down? Or are you telling yourself you're a failure on IE because of weight gain? Is there some part of your IE process that is particularly stuck and is leading to weight gain, or the fear of weight gain? I just wondered today how much longer my weight was going to have to climb until I reached a place where I could start to ease up on eating and move from fear and control to choice. It's delicate work, trying to find a way to work with a psyche that's been battered around and ignored for so long. Love your posts; hope your self talk includes how valued you are on this site. Sandarah > > > > Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. > >  > > I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. > >  > > Ann > > > > > > ________________________________ > > From: Incigul Sayman <incisayman@> > > To: IntuitiveEating_Support > > Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM > > Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! > > > > > >  > > > > I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on " The Biggest Loser " because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater " struggles everyday " with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. > > > > Mimi > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 7, 2012 Report Share Posted January 7, 2012 When my 3 kids started school, I joined the Y. Went to aerobics classes 5 morning a week. Three days a week I went to aquafitness after aerobics. I lost quite a lot of weight and had lots of energy. I did this for about a year and felt great. Of course, I couldn't keep it up. It's not a lifestyle.I am now working on adding movement into my life that is sustainable. I walk to work often. That takes me 25 minutes. Of course, if I walk there I must walk back (unless it's Saturday when my husband can pick me up). I get up and walk often at work. I go up and down the stairs at home, working as inefficiently as possible to get that movement in. Sort of IE for exercise.IE certainly touches all aspects of our lives.Carole To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Friday, January 6, 2012 7:14:43 AM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on "The Biggest Loser" because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater "struggles everyday" with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. Mimi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 7, 2012 Report Share Posted January 7, 2012 Carole, Good for you for figuring out ways to get in exercise that are more practical for you. I enjoy walking with Sansone indoors and also playing badminton outdoors when the weather is nice and I can talk my husband or son into a game. Both are fun ways of getting exercise without leaving the house. Of course, I don't exercise consistently, but there again, the IE falls into place, where I used to feel guilt if I didn't do a certain amount of minutes per day. Thank goodness for IE! To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Saturday, January 7, 2012 9:12 AM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! When my 3 kids started school, I joined the Y. Went to aerobics classes 5 morning a week. Three days a week I went to aquafitness after aerobics. I lost quite a lot of weight and had lots of energy. I did this for about a year and felt great. Of course, I couldn't keep it up. It's not a lifestyle.I am now working on adding movement into my life that is sustainable. I walk to work often. That takes me 25 minutes. Of course, if I walk there I must walk back (unless it's Saturday when my husband can pick me up). I get up and walk often at work. I go up and down the stairs at home, working as inefficiently as possible to get that movement in. Sort of IE for exercise.IE certainly touches all aspects of our lives.Carole To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Friday, January 6, 2012 7:14:43 AM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann From: Incigul Sayman To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on "The Biggest Loser" because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater "struggles everyday" with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. Mimi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 7, 2012 Report Share Posted January 7, 2012 Carole, Good for you for figuring out ways to get in exercise that are more practical for you. I enjoy walking with Sansone indoors and also playing badminton outdoors when the weather is nice and I can talk my husband or son into a game. Both are fun ways of getting exercise without leaving the house. Of course, I don't exercise consistently, but there again, the IE falls into place, where I used to feel guilt if I didn't do a certain amount of minutes per day. Thank goodness for IE! To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Saturday, January 7, 2012 9:12 AM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! When my 3 kids started school, I joined the Y. Went to aerobics classes 5 morning a week. Three days a week I went to aquafitness after aerobics. I lost quite a lot of weight and had lots of energy. I did this for about a year and felt great. Of course, I couldn't keep it up. It's not a lifestyle.I am now working on adding movement into my life that is sustainable. I walk to work often. That takes me 25 minutes. Of course, if I walk there I must walk back (unless it's Saturday when my husband can pick me up). I get up and walk often at work. I go up and down the stairs at home, working as inefficiently as possible to get that movement in. Sort of IE for exercise.IE certainly touches all aspects of our lives.Carole To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Sent: Friday, January 6, 2012 7:14:43 AM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann From: Incigul Sayman To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Thursday, January 5, 2012 12:05 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! I have been away from the holidays, so I am catching up on a 100 plus posts, but wanted to comment on this one before I continue reading. I, too, think it's ridiculous to believe that keeping your body weight steady should be a constant struggle! That's crazy making and the reason many of us are where we are today. I suspect that it's a struggle for the person featured on "The Biggest Loser" because he is not free to honor his hunger signals. With a specified diet plan, you cannot simply eat when you are hungry and many foods are forbidden. And, yes, THAT would definitely be a struggle. One not worth embarking on, in my opinion. I don't think that a normal eater "struggles everyday" with his food and his weight. What a life. Ugh. Mimi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Exactly, Ann. How is that kind of weight loss sustainable? Is it really reasonable to exercise until you throw up?! Your body has a built-in mechanism to stop you when you are causing yourself physical pain. Sometimes it's good to bypass that in a controlled environment of physical training, but what they do to those poor BL "contestants" is extreme. What they are asking of them is to forever mainatin a vigilant program of self denial, pain, and suffering. Wow, I wonder why it sometimes backfires? What is sad is that most people probably think that these people "fail" to maintain their weight loss because they are lazy and not willing to work for it. It's a shame. Mimi Subject: Re: Re: struggle!!To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support >Date: Friday, January 6, 2012, 7:14 AM Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 11, 2012 Report Share Posted January 11, 2012 Mimi, My husband and I have often said that one day they are going to kill someone one that show. Having morbidly obese people, who never exercise, start out by running a mile through the desert is beyond me. I started to watch this season, but when they showed the first one throwing up in a bucket, I'd had enough of it and turned it off. I used to love this show when I was in "diet mentality", but I refuse to watch another moment of the stuff they put these poor people through. So dangerous! To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 1:55 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! Exactly, Ann. How is that kind of weight loss sustainable? Is it really reasonable to exercise until you throw up?! Your body has a built-in mechanism to stop you when you are causing yourself physical pain. Sometimes it's good to bypass that in a controlled environment of physical training, but what they do to those poor BL "contestants" is extreme. What they are asking of them is to forever mainatin a vigilant program of self denial, pain, and suffering. Wow, I wonder why it sometimes backfires? What is sad is that most people probably think that these people "fail" to maintain their weight loss because they are lazy and not willing to work for it. It's a shame. Mimi Subject: Re: Re: struggle!!To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support >Date: Friday, January 6, 2012, 7:14 AM Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 11, 2012 Report Share Posted January 11, 2012 Mimi, My husband and I have often said that one day they are going to kill someone one that show. Having morbidly obese people, who never exercise, start out by running a mile through the desert is beyond me. I started to watch this season, but when they showed the first one throwing up in a bucket, I'd had enough of it and turned it off. I used to love this show when I was in "diet mentality", but I refuse to watch another moment of the stuff they put these poor people through. So dangerous! To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 1:55 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! Exactly, Ann. How is that kind of weight loss sustainable? Is it really reasonable to exercise until you throw up?! Your body has a built-in mechanism to stop you when you are causing yourself physical pain. Sometimes it's good to bypass that in a controlled environment of physical training, but what they do to those poor BL "contestants" is extreme. What they are asking of them is to forever mainatin a vigilant program of self denial, pain, and suffering. Wow, I wonder why it sometimes backfires? What is sad is that most people probably think that these people "fail" to maintain their weight loss because they are lazy and not willing to work for it. It's a shame. Mimi Subject: Re: Re: struggle!!To: "IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support >Date: Friday, January 6, 2012, 7:14 AM Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird. I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle. Ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 11, 2012 Report Share Posted January 11, 2012 I agree 100% and would love to see some follow up 5 years from each show to see where everyone was. Even if they do manage to keep the weight off, what a miserable way to do it. I don't watch anymore either. Sandy  Mimi, My husband and I have often said that one day they are going to kill someone one that show. Having morbidly obese people, who never exercise, start out by running a mile through the desert is beyond me. I started to watch this season, but when they showed the first one throwing up in a bucket, I'd had enough of it and turned it off. I used to love this show when I was in " diet mentality " , but I refuse to watch another moment of the stuff they put these poor people through. So dangerous! To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 1:55 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!!  Exactly, Ann. How is that kind of weight loss sustainable? Is it really reasonable to exercise until you throw up?! Your body has a built-in mechanism to stop you when you are causing yourself physical pain. Sometimes it's good to bypass that in a controlled environment of physical training, but what they do to those poor BL " contestants " is extreme. What they are asking of them is to forever mainatin a vigilant program of self denial, pain, and suffering. Wow, I wonder why it sometimes backfires? What is sad is that most people probably think that these people " fail " to maintain their weight loss because they are lazy and not willing to work for it. It's a shame.  Mimi Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! To: " IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Date: Friday, January 6, 2012, 7:14 AM  Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird.  I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle.  Ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 11, 2012 Report Share Posted January 11, 2012 I agree 100% and would love to see some follow up 5 years from each show to see where everyone was. Even if they do manage to keep the weight off, what a miserable way to do it. I don't watch anymore either. Sandy  Mimi, My husband and I have often said that one day they are going to kill someone one that show. Having morbidly obese people, who never exercise, start out by running a mile through the desert is beyond me. I started to watch this season, but when they showed the first one throwing up in a bucket, I'd had enough of it and turned it off. I used to love this show when I was in " diet mentality " , but I refuse to watch another moment of the stuff they put these poor people through. So dangerous! To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 1:55 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!!  Exactly, Ann. How is that kind of weight loss sustainable? Is it really reasonable to exercise until you throw up?! Your body has a built-in mechanism to stop you when you are causing yourself physical pain. Sometimes it's good to bypass that in a controlled environment of physical training, but what they do to those poor BL " contestants " is extreme. What they are asking of them is to forever mainatin a vigilant program of self denial, pain, and suffering. Wow, I wonder why it sometimes backfires? What is sad is that most people probably think that these people " fail " to maintain their weight loss because they are lazy and not willing to work for it. It's a shame.  Mimi Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! To: " IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Date: Friday, January 6, 2012, 7:14 AM  Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird.  I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle.  Ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 11, 2012 Report Share Posted January 11, 2012 I agree 100% and would love to see some follow up 5 years from each show to see where everyone was. Even if they do manage to keep the weight off, what a miserable way to do it. I don't watch anymore either. Sandy  Mimi, My husband and I have often said that one day they are going to kill someone one that show. Having morbidly obese people, who never exercise, start out by running a mile through the desert is beyond me. I started to watch this season, but when they showed the first one throwing up in a bucket, I'd had enough of it and turned it off. I used to love this show when I was in " diet mentality " , but I refuse to watch another moment of the stuff they put these poor people through. So dangerous! To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 1:55 PM Subject: Re: Re: struggle!!  Exactly, Ann. How is that kind of weight loss sustainable? Is it really reasonable to exercise until you throw up?! Your body has a built-in mechanism to stop you when you are causing yourself physical pain. Sometimes it's good to bypass that in a controlled environment of physical training, but what they do to those poor BL " contestants " is extreme. What they are asking of them is to forever mainatin a vigilant program of self denial, pain, and suffering. Wow, I wonder why it sometimes backfires? What is sad is that most people probably think that these people " fail " to maintain their weight loss because they are lazy and not willing to work for it. It's a shame.  Mimi Subject: Re: Re: struggle!! To: " IntuitiveEating_Support " <IntuitiveEating_Support > Date: Friday, January 6, 2012, 7:14 AM  Amen to all you said here, Mimi. I really feel for those folks on BL and don't see how they possibly maintain their weight loss after going home when they are taught that they must spend hours each week in the gym and must eat like a bird.  I'd rather be comfortably fluffy than to have to live out the rest of my life with that struggle.  Ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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