Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Fabulous 'postcard' from your IE journey Sandarah! Congrats on this big hurdle accomplishment. The reward of peace with food is wonderful. One of the gals that I know from our won beginning here also did 'battle' with ice cream. Her tussles included a strong emotional element associated with ice cream which enhanced the comforting feelings that she got from eating it. I remember her posts about it and how wonderful it was to read that she did get to the place where it was food and not a 'balm'. My own legalization challenge was with chocolate. I felt that I must have eaten hundreds of pounds of it while I was proving to myself that IT wasn't the bane or magic elixir that I had internalized it to be. I still find myself drawn to chocolate when I am unsettled, but now I am aware that there is probably something underneath that drive and when I do give myself permission to enjoy it guilt doesn't play in like it used to and I also find I eat quite a bit less than I did before. You may find that ice cream will 'call' to you off and on in the future, but I bet not like it had before. GOOD WORK! and thanks for sharing as that is so inspiring too. Katcha IEing since March 2007 > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > Sandarah > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Fabulous 'postcard' from your IE journey Sandarah! Congrats on this big hurdle accomplishment. The reward of peace with food is wonderful. One of the gals that I know from our won beginning here also did 'battle' with ice cream. Her tussles included a strong emotional element associated with ice cream which enhanced the comforting feelings that she got from eating it. I remember her posts about it and how wonderful it was to read that she did get to the place where it was food and not a 'balm'. My own legalization challenge was with chocolate. I felt that I must have eaten hundreds of pounds of it while I was proving to myself that IT wasn't the bane or magic elixir that I had internalized it to be. I still find myself drawn to chocolate when I am unsettled, but now I am aware that there is probably something underneath that drive and when I do give myself permission to enjoy it guilt doesn't play in like it used to and I also find I eat quite a bit less than I did before. You may find that ice cream will 'call' to you off and on in the future, but I bet not like it had before. GOOD WORK! and thanks for sharing as that is so inspiring too. Katcha IEing since March 2007 > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > Sandarah > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Chocolate was always a draw for me too. Lately, our family has had a bin filled with it from which we pick a couple of pieces most nights after dinner. I've made a point of allowing myself to have some whenever I have wanted some as well, and an finding it's losing its appeal. I don't even think about it most of the time now, even though it's right there. I do keep it above eye level so I'm not slammed with it, though. I also find I'm not feeling guilty for eating it when I want to. Jane > > > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > > > Sandarah > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Chocolate was always a draw for me too. Lately, our family has had a bin filled with it from which we pick a couple of pieces most nights after dinner. I've made a point of allowing myself to have some whenever I have wanted some as well, and an finding it's losing its appeal. I don't even think about it most of the time now, even though it's right there. I do keep it above eye level so I'm not slammed with it, though. I also find I'm not feeling guilty for eating it when I want to. Jane > > > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > > > Sandarah > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Sandarah, Thanks for sharing! Wonderful news! And I think the " point " of IE isn't that you get perfect at IE, it's that eating/body image ceases to take center stage... exactly what you describe. Best, Abby  Chocolate was always a draw for me too. Lately, our family has had a bin filled with it from which we pick a couple of pieces most nights after dinner. I've made a point of allowing myself to have some whenever I have wanted some as well, and an finding it's losing its appeal. I don't even think about it most of the time now, even though it's right there. I do keep it above eye level so I'm not slammed with it, though. I also find I'm not feeling guilty for eating it when I want to. Jane > > > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > > > Sandarah > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Sandarah, Thanks for sharing! Wonderful news! And I think the " point " of IE isn't that you get perfect at IE, it's that eating/body image ceases to take center stage... exactly what you describe. Best, Abby  Chocolate was always a draw for me too. Lately, our family has had a bin filled with it from which we pick a couple of pieces most nights after dinner. I've made a point of allowing myself to have some whenever I have wanted some as well, and an finding it's losing its appeal. I don't even think about it most of the time now, even though it's right there. I do keep it above eye level so I'm not slammed with it, though. I also find I'm not feeling guilty for eating it when I want to. Jane > > > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > > > Sandarah > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Sandarah, Thanks for sharing! Wonderful news! And I think the " point " of IE isn't that you get perfect at IE, it's that eating/body image ceases to take center stage... exactly what you describe. Best, Abby  Chocolate was always a draw for me too. Lately, our family has had a bin filled with it from which we pick a couple of pieces most nights after dinner. I've made a point of allowing myself to have some whenever I have wanted some as well, and an finding it's losing its appeal. I don't even think about it most of the time now, even though it's right there. I do keep it above eye level so I'm not slammed with it, though. I also find I'm not feeling guilty for eating it when I want to. Jane > > > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > > > Sandarah > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Bravo, Sandarah, for getting over the hump. For me that food was potato chips. I truly believed I was addicted to them. I would eat 2 snack bags a day and sometimes veer into 3. I was so ashamed and afraid of my cravings. Like you, whenever I had the urge to eat them I would be struck with a panicked "uh oh!" I didn't feel in control. On days when I would refrain (at great cost to myself), I would feel virtuous and like I was embarking on a new life of control and discipline -- only to feel the sting of failure the next day when I again "succumbed." There were times I took the empty potato chips bags and taped them up on my office window to, I guess, rub my face in my shame and failure. I thought if I looked at how much I was consuming I would be able to stop. With IE, I have simply monitored how I feel when I eat the chips. Surprisingly, most of them make me feel pretty crummy. I have found that my desire for all the old favorites is much diminished. I eat only one kind now and it's as close to homemade as they come. Since really paying attention, I am no longer afraid of chips and I no longer binge on them. It took a while, but it feels great. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Bravo, Sandarah, for getting over the hump. For me that food was potato chips. I truly believed I was addicted to them. I would eat 2 snack bags a day and sometimes veer into 3. I was so ashamed and afraid of my cravings. Like you, whenever I had the urge to eat them I would be struck with a panicked "uh oh!" I didn't feel in control. On days when I would refrain (at great cost to myself), I would feel virtuous and like I was embarking on a new life of control and discipline -- only to feel the sting of failure the next day when I again "succumbed." There were times I took the empty potato chips bags and taped them up on my office window to, I guess, rub my face in my shame and failure. I thought if I looked at how much I was consuming I would be able to stop. With IE, I have simply monitored how I feel when I eat the chips. Surprisingly, most of them make me feel pretty crummy. I have found that my desire for all the old favorites is much diminished. I eat only one kind now and it's as close to homemade as they come. Since really paying attention, I am no longer afraid of chips and I no longer binge on them. It took a while, but it feels great. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 Bravo, Sandarah, for getting over the hump. For me that food was potato chips. I truly believed I was addicted to them. I would eat 2 snack bags a day and sometimes veer into 3. I was so ashamed and afraid of my cravings. Like you, whenever I had the urge to eat them I would be struck with a panicked "uh oh!" I didn't feel in control. On days when I would refrain (at great cost to myself), I would feel virtuous and like I was embarking on a new life of control and discipline -- only to feel the sting of failure the next day when I again "succumbed." There were times I took the empty potato chips bags and taped them up on my office window to, I guess, rub my face in my shame and failure. I thought if I looked at how much I was consuming I would be able to stop. With IE, I have simply monitored how I feel when I eat the chips. Surprisingly, most of them make me feel pretty crummy. I have found that my desire for all the old favorites is much diminished. I eat only one kind now and it's as close to homemade as they come. Since really paying attention, I am no longer afraid of chips and I no longer binge on them. It took a while, but it feels great. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 This is absolutely amazing to me. I look forward to feeling this way about several foods. Congratulations, Mimi, and thank you for sharing this. I am new to this group so every post is an "aha!" moment for me. Bravo, Sandarah, for getting over the hump. For me that food was potato chips. I truly believed I was addicted to them. I would eat 2 snack bags a day and sometimes veer into 3. I was so ashamed and afraid of my cravings. Like you, whenever I had the urge to eat them I would be struck with a panicked "uh oh!" I didn't feel in control. On days when I would refrain (at great cost to myself), I would feel virtuous and like I was embarking on a new life of control and discipline -- only to feel the sting of failure the next day when I again "succumbed." There were times I took the empty potato chips bags and taped them up on my office window to, I guess, rub my face in my shame and failure. I thought if I looked at how much I was consuming I would be able to stop. With IE, I have simply monitored how I feel when I eat the chips. Surprisingly, most of them make me feel pretty crummy. I have found that my desire for all the old favorites is much diminished. I eat only one kind now and it's as close to homemade as they come. Since really paying attention, I am no longer afraid of chips and I no longer binge on them. It took a while, but it feels great. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 11, 2011 Report Share Posted October 11, 2011 This is absolutely amazing to me. I look forward to feeling this way about several foods. Congratulations, Mimi, and thank you for sharing this. I am new to this group so every post is an "aha!" moment for me. Bravo, Sandarah, for getting over the hump. For me that food was potato chips. I truly believed I was addicted to them. I would eat 2 snack bags a day and sometimes veer into 3. I was so ashamed and afraid of my cravings. Like you, whenever I had the urge to eat them I would be struck with a panicked "uh oh!" I didn't feel in control. On days when I would refrain (at great cost to myself), I would feel virtuous and like I was embarking on a new life of control and discipline -- only to feel the sting of failure the next day when I again "succumbed." There were times I took the empty potato chips bags and taped them up on my office window to, I guess, rub my face in my shame and failure. I thought if I looked at how much I was consuming I would be able to stop. With IE, I have simply monitored how I feel when I eat the chips. Surprisingly, most of them make me feel pretty crummy. I have found that my desire for all the old favorites is much diminished. I eat only one kind now and it's as close to homemade as they come. Since really paying attention, I am no longer afraid of chips and I no longer binge on them. It took a while, but it feels great. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2011 Report Share Posted October 12, 2011 Fantastic - congratulations - the is so hopeful! > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > Sandarah > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2011 Report Share Posted October 12, 2011 , you will get there, but it does take some time and effort. Mostly, it takes an absolute belief that you will never deprive yourself of food again. In the diet world it would be called, "giving in," and it can be tricky. If you are legalizing food in the hope that you will no longer crave it, it is easy to build in subtle restrictions and expectations for yourself that can sabotage your efforts. Whenever I tried to legalize with the goal that I would no longer want to eat the formerly restricted food, I would start "last supper" binge eating. In my mind I knew that I wasn't truly free to eat the forbidden food as much as I wanted -- that in the future my goal was to stop eating it. Therefore, I had to "get it while I could." This is similar to the the "day before starting a diet" mentality that many of us are familiar with. Ironically, it's when you truly give yourself permission to eat what you are hungry for, with no expectation that the urge for the forbidden food will disappear, that it begins to abate. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2011 Report Share Posted October 12, 2011 , you will get there, but it does take some time and effort. Mostly, it takes an absolute belief that you will never deprive yourself of food again. In the diet world it would be called, "giving in," and it can be tricky. If you are legalizing food in the hope that you will no longer crave it, it is easy to build in subtle restrictions and expectations for yourself that can sabotage your efforts. Whenever I tried to legalize with the goal that I would no longer want to eat the formerly restricted food, I would start "last supper" binge eating. In my mind I knew that I wasn't truly free to eat the forbidden food as much as I wanted -- that in the future my goal was to stop eating it. Therefore, I had to "get it while I could." This is similar to the the "day before starting a diet" mentality that many of us are familiar with. Ironically, it's when you truly give yourself permission to eat what you are hungry for, with no expectation that the urge for the forbidden food will disappear, that it begins to abate. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2011 Report Share Posted October 12, 2011 , you will get there, but it does take some time and effort. Mostly, it takes an absolute belief that you will never deprive yourself of food again. In the diet world it would be called, "giving in," and it can be tricky. If you are legalizing food in the hope that you will no longer crave it, it is easy to build in subtle restrictions and expectations for yourself that can sabotage your efforts. Whenever I tried to legalize with the goal that I would no longer want to eat the formerly restricted food, I would start "last supper" binge eating. In my mind I knew that I wasn't truly free to eat the forbidden food as much as I wanted -- that in the future my goal was to stop eating it. Therefore, I had to "get it while I could." This is similar to the the "day before starting a diet" mentality that many of us are familiar with. Ironically, it's when you truly give yourself permission to eat what you are hungry for, with no expectation that the urge for the forbidden food will disappear, that it begins to abate. Mimi Subject: Post legalization...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by "oh no") and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame.My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that!Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a "perfect" dinner and that I ate in the car. I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life.I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. Sandarah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 12, 2011 Report Share Posted October 12, 2011 You said a mouthful... so to speak. Yes, to all of that! > > > > Subject: Post legalization... > To: IntuitiveEating_Support > Date: Monday, October 10, 2011, 11:03 PM > > > >  > > Don't know how long I spent on this, but I've come out the other side on my effort to legalize ice cream. I don't know how much I ate over the few weeks but I ate it whenever I had the urge and didn't overly focus on how much, sometimes eating past full and sometimes not so much. > > Often I knew I wasn't hungry for it, but I had the urge or craving (accompanied by " oh no " ) and so I ate it. I ate it to make it legal and to give that part of myself the loud and clear message that nothing is forbidden and that the effects of my choices were no longer going to be intercepted by nagging, shaming and self blame. > > My intention was to break through the guilt, recrimination and negativity about my food choices and it seems to have worked. And to let myself enjoy what I enjoy in hopes of balancing out these warring notions. Imagine that! > > Now my body is recovering from eating too much ice cream over too long of a time. My stomach sort of hurts and is overly acidic - but at least now I can experience the repercussions of my food choice rather than sit in shame and feelings of failure. > > So, for now, I'm discovering that food isn't a big issue one way or the other. And on top of that, I'm ok with my image as a chubby woman. I don't look like someone worthy of disgust, hate, or shunning - I'm just a fairly average looking person who isn't thin and beautiful. > > I don't know where the IE process will go from here. I did gain weight initially, probably not a lot, it seemed to go away of its own accord - and I'm sure that I put on a bit during this ice cream project and I'm sure it will come off too. > > On my way home from work tonight I ate some potato salad and some mints that I picked up at the check out stand of the deli. I ate part of a toasted baquette and had some licorice tea when I got home - and I realized that it was no big deal that I didn't have a " perfect " dinner and that I ate in the car. > > I was hungry - I have a long drive - and I don't have to meditate and pour over every meal and every bite like I'm some kind of food guru or saint. It was just food and I was hungry. > > So... I dunno. Just wanted to check in. Haven't written much lately as the energy of doing IE perfectly has diminished and I'm settling into a new stage of normalizing my feelings about food and eating. My weight is longer center stage and the be all end all of my life. > > Even if I go no further in this process, this peaceful juncture is a true miracle from where I've lived for too many years of my life. > > I wonder if anyone else had one food in particular that was so difficult to get past? I swear getting ice cream into some kind of perspective has been like climbing Mount Everest. Woof. There's really nothing left that has that kind of power over me. Thankfully. > > Sandarah > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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