Re: Telling NADA about the support group

[Guest guest]

LOL, That's exactly how I see my fada reacting, if I said some such thing

about a support group.

Holly

>

>

> I am actually the daughter-in-law, but I've managed to get my husband to

> start reading this site and the information here has been great and you all

> have been so supportive.

>

> Hubby had quite the discussion with his nada the other day and I just had

> to share. First of all, let me say, hubby is learning how to separate

> himself. He has done an amazing job in so many ways. When she called and he

> was getting ready to call her back, he knew what he was in for and we went

> over how to handle it. But, he still gets sucked in. So, the call didn't go

> well, to say the least and it was an hour and a half of the same old stuff

> she always throws at him.

>

> But here's the best part - when she was mad at him for not doing this or

> that, he casually mentioned that he had joined a support group and that it

> was helping him deal with their estranged relationship. He said he was doing

> it to better understand it and to help him deal with it.

>

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

> side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

> defend myself. "

>

> He explained the support group was for HIM, not her. She wouldn't hear any

> of it. She went on and on.

>

> It honestly made me laugh. (What else can I do, right?) Classic nada. Just

> had to share.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

LOL, That's exactly how I see my fada reacting, if I said some such thing

about a support group.

Holly

>

>

> I am actually the daughter-in-law, but I've managed to get my husband to

> start reading this site and the information here has been great and you all

> have been so supportive.

>

> Hubby had quite the discussion with his nada the other day and I just had

> to share. First of all, let me say, hubby is learning how to separate

> himself. He has done an amazing job in so many ways. When she called and he

> was getting ready to call her back, he knew what he was in for and we went

> over how to handle it. But, he still gets sucked in. So, the call didn't go

> well, to say the least and it was an hour and a half of the same old stuff

> she always throws at him.

>

> But here's the best part - when she was mad at him for not doing this or

> that, he casually mentioned that he had joined a support group and that it

> was helping him deal with their estranged relationship. He said he was doing

> it to better understand it and to help him deal with it.

>

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

> side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

> defend myself. "

>

> He explained the support group was for HIM, not her. She wouldn't hear any

> of it. She went on and on.

>

> It honestly made me laugh. (What else can I do, right?) Classic nada. Just

> had to share.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

LOL, That's exactly how I see my fada reacting, if I said some such thing

about a support group.

Holly

>

>

> I am actually the daughter-in-law, but I've managed to get my husband to

> start reading this site and the information here has been great and you all

> have been so supportive.

>

> Hubby had quite the discussion with his nada the other day and I just had

> to share. First of all, let me say, hubby is learning how to separate

> himself. He has done an amazing job in so many ways. When she called and he

> was getting ready to call her back, he knew what he was in for and we went

> over how to handle it. But, he still gets sucked in. So, the call didn't go

> well, to say the least and it was an hour and a half of the same old stuff

> she always throws at him.

>

> But here's the best part - when she was mad at him for not doing this or

> that, he casually mentioned that he had joined a support group and that it

> was helping him deal with their estranged relationship. He said he was doing

> it to better understand it and to help him deal with it.

>

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

> side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

> defend myself. "

>

> He explained the support group was for HIM, not her. She wouldn't hear any

> of it. She went on and on.

>

> It honestly made me laugh. (What else can I do, right?) Classic nada. Just

> had to share.

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Good for you and hubby! Have you and he started reading the various books about

setting and maintaining healthy boundaries and not permitting yourself to endure

abusive behaviors, such as " Stop Walking On Eggshells " and " Boundaries " and

" Co-dependent No More " ?

-Annie

>

> I am actually the daughter-in-law, but I've managed to get my husband to start

reading this site and the information here has been great and you all have been

so supportive.

>

> Hubby had quite the discussion with his nada the other day and I just had to

share. First of all, let me say, hubby is learning how to separate himself. He

has done an amazing job in so many ways. When she called and he was getting

ready to call her back, he knew what he was in for and we went over how to

handle it. But, he still gets sucked in. So, the call didn't go well, to say

the least and it was an hour and a half of the same old stuff she always throws

at him.

>

> But here's the best part - when she was mad at him for not doing this or that,

he casually mentioned that he had joined a support group and that it was helping

him deal with their estranged relationship. He said he was doing it to better

understand it and to help him deal with it.

>

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY side! "

" How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to defend

myself. "

>

> He explained the support group was for HIM, not her. She wouldn't hear any of

it. She went on and on.

>

> It honestly made me laugh. (What else can I do, right?) Classic nada. Just

had to share.

>

[Guest guest]

It really was comical. She was adamant - I think she thought he was going to a

live support group because she wanted to come too.

Telling " her side " is a big thing for her. It's all about who takes her side

and who doesn't. Enough already.

Sorry - it has been a long week with her in a full fledged episode and I'm just

done.

>

> I am actually the daughter-in-law, but I've managed to get my husband to start

reading this site and the information here has been great and you all have been

so supportive.

>

> Hubby had quite the discussion with his nada the other day and I just had to

share. First of all, let me say, hubby is learning how to separate himself. He

has done an amazing job in so many ways. When she called and he was getting

ready to call her back, he knew what he was in for and we went over how to

handle it. But, he still gets sucked in. So, the call didn't go well, to say

the least and it was an hour and a half of the same old stuff she always throws

at him.

>

> But here's the best part - when she was mad at him for not doing this or that,

he casually mentioned that he had joined a support group and that it was helping

him deal with their estranged relationship. He said he was doing it to better

understand it and to help him deal with it.

>

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY side! "

" How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to defend

myself. "

>

> He explained the support group was for HIM, not her. She wouldn't hear any of

it. She went on and on.

>

> It honestly made me laugh. (What else can I do, right?) Classic nada. Just

had to share.

>

[Guest guest]

It really was comical. She was adamant - I think she thought he was going to a

live support group because she wanted to come too.

Telling " her side " is a big thing for her. It's all about who takes her side

and who doesn't. Enough already.

Sorry - it has been a long week with her in a full fledged episode and I'm just

done.

>

> I am actually the daughter-in-law, but I've managed to get my husband to start

reading this site and the information here has been great and you all have been

so supportive.

>

> Hubby had quite the discussion with his nada the other day and I just had to

share. First of all, let me say, hubby is learning how to separate himself. He

has done an amazing job in so many ways. When she called and he was getting

ready to call her back, he knew what he was in for and we went over how to

handle it. But, he still gets sucked in. So, the call didn't go well, to say

the least and it was an hour and a half of the same old stuff she always throws

at him.

>

> But here's the best part - when she was mad at him for not doing this or that,

he casually mentioned that he had joined a support group and that it was helping

him deal with their estranged relationship. He said he was doing it to better

understand it and to help him deal with it.

>

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY side! "

" How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to defend

myself. "

>

> He explained the support group was for HIM, not her. She wouldn't hear any of

it. She went on and on.

>

> It honestly made me laugh. (What else can I do, right?) Classic nada. Just

had to share.

>

[Guest guest]

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

defend myself. "

The HELL we don t! We ve heard her side all our lives.

Doug

[Guest guest]

> Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

defend myself. "

The HELL we don t! We ve heard her side all our lives.

Doug

[Guest guest]

Excellent point, Doug!!!!!! Wish I had thought of that!

>

>

> > Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

> side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

> defend myself. "

>

>

> The HELL we don t! We ve heard her side all our lives.

>

>

>

> Doug

>

[Guest guest]

Excellent point, Doug!!!!!! Wish I had thought of that!

>

>

> > Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

> side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

> defend myself. "

>

>

> The HELL we don t! We ve heard her side all our lives.

>

>

>

> Doug

>

[Guest guest]

Excellent point, Doug!!!!!! Wish I had thought of that!

>

>

> > Well, she completely lost it! Her response was " But they don't know MY

> side! " " How can you tell other people about me? I don't get a chance to

> defend myself. "

>

>

> The HELL we don t! We ve heard her side all our lives.

>

>

>

> Doug

>