I didn't handle the BBQ well, but that's okay.

August 6, 2011

This afternoon we attended a BBQ at a campground an hour away celebrating the

50th birthday of a friend of ours. I was hungry when we first ate, had been

hungry for an hour and waited. I did fine on stopping when I wasn't hungry

anymore. It took more food than I anticipated, but nothing compared to an

average meal a few weeks ago. Then later, they served dessert. I wanted some,

plus I was feeding my kids, so I went ahead and had a small brownie and a

cupcake. No problem, still not full. But then the kids kept eating, chips and

stuff, and I found myself nibbling and not apparently able to stop, while

holding a plate of chips for my toddler in my lap. And I NEVER FELT FULL. It's

not like I ate a ton or anything, but it was disturbing to see how very true it

is that if I eat when I'm not hungry, I have no " no longer hungry " sign to clue

me in on when to stop. Now, a couple of hours later, I can tell there's food in

my stomach and I feel a bit annoyed about it, and a little green from car

sickness after I drove us the hour home in heavy traffic in the rain, but I'm

not beating myself up about a couple of handfuls of chips and 2 small desserts.

Small potatoes, for me. I had three things working against me: 1) The

distractions of child care. (We were next to a lake with my 2 year old and my

teen with mental retardation, not to mention my hyperactive tween, who doesn't

pay attention to danger.) Plus having to hold my daughter's food in my lap

because of the camp-out. 2) The distractions of socializing at the same time as

eating. & 3) I started eating again when I was not hungry, and since my body

hadn't given me a green light, it couldn't give me a yellow light either. Hmm,

I guess there was a 4) Since I hadn't brought the food and it was home-cooked, I

wasn't sure I could have some later, so wanted to eat right then so I wouldn't

miss out. (I'll bet they wouldn't have cared if I had taken a brownie and

wrapped it up and put it in my car for later. Wish I'd thought of it then.)

Social eating seems to be a bit problematic for me right now. I've noticed that

even eating with my family makes it TONS harder to notice when I'm not hungry

anymore.

Jane

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