Transforming from Door Mat

[Guest guest]

I am new to this forum and have been reading for a week to see if maybe I fit in

here. Your posts are so helpful.

After growing up wanting so badly to get away from Nada's rages and control, I

escaped into a marriage to a needy narcissist. I am thinking of filing for Legal

Separation, which delights Nada. She almost drools in anticipation of the time I

will have for her if I no longer live as doormat to my spouse.

I find the decision to be bigger than me. While I attempt to transform from a

doormat into whatever else I can be, I am grateful for the insights which I gain

from your posts.

[Guest guest]

Hi , welcome!

I don't think you should let yourself be a doormat to anyone. Not your

(ex)husband, not your nada. It takes time to get there, but you can get

there!

Mia

>

[Guest guest]

Hi , welcome!

I don't think you should let yourself be a doormat to anyone. Not your

(ex)husband, not your nada. It takes time to get there, but you can get

there!

Mia

>

[Guest guest]

Those who have BPD are really good at using FOG (fear, obligation, guilt) to

make us be doormats to them. Have you read Stop Walking on Eggshells? Many

people on the forum have read it (I'm still making my way through it) but it

really helps you understand the BPD mindset and behavior so that you can set up

boundaries and learn to not take it personally (although I still don't get that

one. I know it's not about me, but it still hurts).

As another KO said to me recently: glad you found the board; sorry you qualify.

[Guest guest]

Those who have BPD are really good at using FOG (fear, obligation, guilt) to

make us be doormats to them. Have you read Stop Walking on Eggshells? Many

people on the forum have read it (I'm still making my way through it) but it

really helps you understand the BPD mindset and behavior so that you can set up

boundaries and learn to not take it personally (although I still don't get that

one. I know it's not about me, but it still hurts).

As another KO said to me recently: glad you found the board; sorry you qualify.

[Guest guest]

Those who have BPD are really good at using FOG (fear, obligation, guilt) to

make us be doormats to them. Have you read Stop Walking on Eggshells? Many

people on the forum have read it (I'm still making my way through it) but it

really helps you understand the BPD mindset and behavior so that you can set up

boundaries and learn to not take it personally (although I still don't get that

one. I know it's not about me, but it still hurts).

As another KO said to me recently: glad you found the board; sorry you qualify.