What it feels like for a boy...

[Guest guest]

I am feeling a bit overwhelmed as I write this simply because I had no idea such

groups existed. I am a 35 yo single son of a mother with traits of BPD (never

been diagnosed). I moved back home with my parents after 8 years living alone

and I thank god because it is all making sense for me now why I experience gut

wrenching feelings around her.

This week I was watching TV and couch surfing and she came next to me asking me

if I would do her a favour (pack some stuff in my luggage to give to my brother

for christmas). I said yes. Then she said she wanted to stay next to me to

talk about this and that. I wasn't in the mood to talk and I said no thank you.

All hell broke loose. She started screaming and shouting saying that she's not

my mother and that I always hated her. I could not believe it. I called my Dad

to intervene as I was not going to accept this behaviour. In the meantime I

told her that I used to go to a therapist and that she suggested I keep

boundaries with my mother. (the therapist never mentioned BPD to me)

All hell breaks loose a second time. She was demanding that I tell her what

that 'strange woman' was saying about her and that she will never forget this as

long as she lives and that she will take it with her to her grave.

I mean talk about drama. I am so tired that I decided that I will be extending

my trip to my brother until I figure out what I want to do with my life.

It is gut wrenching for a boy who loves his mother to be dealing with so much.

I am determined to deal with this monster and thanks to this site and a book I

ordered today online that there is hope for me.