Re: I'm so discouraged...me too...

[Guest guest]

I just went shopping for something to wear to a Christmas party this work. It's

the first relatively formal occasion I've been to in a long time. I was

flabbergasted when I saw how awful I looked in the three-way mirror in the

dressing room - and had to fight my raging negative self-talk as I shopped.

I was also the urge to reflex into thinking about how to " lose this stinking

weight " . I managed to work my way through the mental and emotional barrage but

bought several outfits not really able to concentrate well enough to know

whether or not I actually liked what I bought.

Got home and ate - and noticed how it felt but continued past full but not to

the point of being stuffed. Now I've settled in a bit and am waiting for some

tea.

All of that said, I too do not plan to diet. And, I have been making progress,

it's just not the kind that's resulted in achieving a diet goal. I did manage

to think about the various IE women on this site while shopping and it was

comforting to know that I'm not alone with these feelings and the struggle to

break free of thinking that got me fat in the first place.

I don't know how to " work " IE any harder or better than I am because effort only

creates resistance and backlash. So working harder, maybe means being easier on

myself for being me and being the victim of a social standard that serves no one

except those who profit off of our desire to look good.

I refuse to wear too-tight clothes too. It's just not worth it to be

uncomfortable. Thanks for sharing.

Sandarah

>

> I haven't weighed myself for two months now, and about smooth and a half or

less ago I went and bought five new pairs of pants that actually fit me, and now

they're all too tight too! What do I do? I'm so discouraged. I know I'm not

going to diet, but I don't want to keep getting bigger and bigger. I want to

live in the world where no one would ever gain or lose an ounce, and I wouldn't

have to think about any of this. I don't want to think about it, but I don't

want to keep getting bigger and bigger either.

>

> Many things are going well. I have sweets in the house that I'm eating

periodically (I,m really enjoying baking again, and am surprised at how few of

the baked things I need to feel satisfied). I',m finding myself realizing when

I'm full and stopping, if not exactly at that moment then sooner than I would

have before. I'm not eating meals when I'm not hungry, and often skipping meals

altogether when I've eaten a lot earlier. But still.....

>

> I don't like it. I'm going out in a little while and buying yet another round

of pants, because I refuse to wear too-tight pants, and I want some tops to wear

to work that actually look good.

>

> Sigh.

>

> Tilley

>

[Guest guest]

I just went shopping for something to wear to a Christmas party this work. It's

the first relatively formal occasion I've been to in a long time. I was

flabbergasted when I saw how awful I looked in the three-way mirror in the

dressing room - and had to fight my raging negative self-talk as I shopped.

I was also the urge to reflex into thinking about how to " lose this stinking

weight " . I managed to work my way through the mental and emotional barrage but

bought several outfits not really able to concentrate well enough to know

whether or not I actually liked what I bought.

Got home and ate - and noticed how it felt but continued past full but not to

the point of being stuffed. Now I've settled in a bit and am waiting for some

tea.

All of that said, I too do not plan to diet. And, I have been making progress,

it's just not the kind that's resulted in achieving a diet goal. I did manage

to think about the various IE women on this site while shopping and it was

comforting to know that I'm not alone with these feelings and the struggle to

break free of thinking that got me fat in the first place.

I don't know how to " work " IE any harder or better than I am because effort only

creates resistance and backlash. So working harder, maybe means being easier on

myself for being me and being the victim of a social standard that serves no one

except those who profit off of our desire to look good.

I refuse to wear too-tight clothes too. It's just not worth it to be

uncomfortable. Thanks for sharing.

Sandarah

>

> I haven't weighed myself for two months now, and about smooth and a half or

less ago I went and bought five new pairs of pants that actually fit me, and now

they're all too tight too! What do I do? I'm so discouraged. I know I'm not

going to diet, but I don't want to keep getting bigger and bigger. I want to

live in the world where no one would ever gain or lose an ounce, and I wouldn't

have to think about any of this. I don't want to think about it, but I don't

want to keep getting bigger and bigger either.

>

> Many things are going well. I have sweets in the house that I'm eating

periodically (I,m really enjoying baking again, and am surprised at how few of

the baked things I need to feel satisfied). I',m finding myself realizing when

I'm full and stopping, if not exactly at that moment then sooner than I would

have before. I'm not eating meals when I'm not hungry, and often skipping meals

altogether when I've eaten a lot earlier. But still.....

>

> I don't like it. I'm going out in a little while and buying yet another round

of pants, because I refuse to wear too-tight pants, and I want some tops to wear

to work that actually look good.

>

> Sigh.

>

> Tilley

>