Guest guest Posted January 28, 2012 Report Share Posted January 28, 2012 I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 28, 2012 Report Share Posted January 28, 2012 Ellie, I don't think so. I mean, I do need to grocery shop because my supplies are dwindling, but I'm going to do that on Wed. because I'll get a discount. Plus it's not like I was hungry or wanting to eat. It has something to do with emptiness, emptiness in my heart and soul, I think. Maybe occupying myself with buying and eating food is a way that I procrastinate dealing with my inner emptiness. Sara > > Do you need food? > > Ellie > > > > >________________________________ > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 28, 2012 Report Share Posted January 28, 2012 Ellie, I don't think so. I mean, I do need to grocery shop because my supplies are dwindling, but I'm going to do that on Wed. because I'll get a discount. Plus it's not like I was hungry or wanting to eat. It has something to do with emptiness, emptiness in my heart and soul, I think. Maybe occupying myself with buying and eating food is a way that I procrastinate dealing with my inner emptiness. Sara > > Do you need food? > > Ellie > > > > >________________________________ > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 28, 2012 Report Share Posted January 28, 2012 Ellie, I don't think so. I mean, I do need to grocery shop because my supplies are dwindling, but I'm going to do that on Wed. because I'll get a discount. Plus it's not like I was hungry or wanting to eat. It has something to do with emptiness, emptiness in my heart and soul, I think. Maybe occupying myself with buying and eating food is a way that I procrastinate dealing with my inner emptiness. Sara > > Do you need food? > > Ellie > > > > >________________________________ > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2012 Report Share Posted January 29, 2012 , did you know that the name " Ananda " , a version of your name, means " that joy without which the universe would cease to exist " ? I'll have to find my reference for that although I have read it in more than one place. I'm pretty sure one of them was in the(found it) " The Time Quartet " by Madeleine L'Engle. It's Sanskrit meaning more exactly " that joy in existence without which the universe would fall apart and collapse " . It comes from the " Swiftly Tilting Planet " book in the quartet. WOW! Great name. Sandy  Wow--completely relate! In fact, I got goose bumps when you said what you did about finding the joy in everyday life b/c God has been repeating this message to me several times a day over the last couple weeks and I've been amazed at the effect it has on my emotions. For instance, there's an intersection I have to go thru on my way to work which involves heavy traffic merging into one lane, and people are constantly cutting each other off. I'd come to dread that part of my morning commute b/c of what I'd witness. One particularly traffic-heavy morning, I almost get run off the road not once but TWICE by a little sports car w/ an attitude and find myself absolutely fuming all the way to work. In my anger, I decide I'm never going that way again--even if it is the most direct route--b/c I never care to start my day with that level of anxiety again. I plan a less direct route on a main road which involves at least a dozen traffic lights, accepting that this will mean it will take me longer to get to work, but will be worth it. A couple hours later I hear His prodding, " So what joy came out of that situation? " Somewhat begrudgingly, I find myself mentally replying with, " I'll get to enjoy a new drive to work from now on. " The next day I drive to work, utterly shocked to find every single one of those lights to be green and hardly ANY traffic. I really DID enjoy my drive and arrived within 5 min of my norm. And like you implied below, those moments of joy are often so much better than any food I could have stuffed down when not hungry. A big toothless grin from my infant son brings just as much, if not more, joy than chocolate--THAT'S saying something! I love knowing more than one of us is on this journey of joy--b/c it's there to be had in many more situations than we ever thought possible. And it's helping me to come out of what I now recogize had become a mild state of depression. Suddenly I'm feeling hopeful--in everything from my body, to my family, to the path God's laid out for me. I truly am blessed, as it sounds like you are as well. Keep searching for that joy, my friend--let no one take it from you! IE since 2011 To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Sunday, January 29, 2012 12:10 PM Subject: Re: Struggling A Bit  This post may sound like it has nothing to do with intuitive eating, yet for my entire life my eating has had to do with any and everything in addition to needing nourishment. So does it follow that if I let go of filling non-physical needs with food, that I have to replace it with something? This post may sound like I'm a little crazy (maybe I am!), but this is hitting the place where the emptiness is. I spent a lot of time last night trying to determine what the emptiness is that I want to fill by buying bags of groceries. It is not an empty stomach. My body was nourished. But I didn't have the mounds of food covering the non-physical part of me. That for me feels naked, in a sense, and I was wanting to cover up. Does that even make sense? It was this morning as I picked up a study group book to read the next chapter that I knew. It is emptiness within my soul. I think I actually already knew this. But I didn't really know how to fill that emptiness. Now I do. When I was going through divorce, someone told me to look for small moments of joy in each day, even in my pain. I did that enough to know that when I do this, I am filled with peace and joy. It is a place that no fresh-baked slice of lemon meringe pie could come close to touching. That is it. It is simply to look for these moments in everything I do. The answer is right here. All I have to do is to stop and fill up with it. But in the hecticness of living in the 21st century, I forget to let myself be filled with these things, to even notice them. So here is what is filling me thus far today: the brilliant winter sun casting sharp shadows of naked tree branches against my neighbor's white-planked house the aroma of a hot mug of sweet jasmine tea the squeak of the front door announcing the arrival of two of my sons the graceful way tall pine trees outside my window move in today's strong wind the feel of my ultra-soft robe against my skin the distant sound of wind-chimes tinkling a few hours of solitude at home Sara > > > > Do you need food? > > > > Ellie > > > > > > > > >________________________________ > > > From: sarab80753 <sarab80753@> > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2012 Report Share Posted January 29, 2012 , did you know that the name " Ananda " , a version of your name, means " that joy without which the universe would cease to exist " ? I'll have to find my reference for that although I have read it in more than one place. I'm pretty sure one of them was in the(found it) " The Time Quartet " by Madeleine L'Engle. It's Sanskrit meaning more exactly " that joy in existence without which the universe would fall apart and collapse " . It comes from the " Swiftly Tilting Planet " book in the quartet. WOW! Great name. Sandy  Wow--completely relate! In fact, I got goose bumps when you said what you did about finding the joy in everyday life b/c God has been repeating this message to me several times a day over the last couple weeks and I've been amazed at the effect it has on my emotions. For instance, there's an intersection I have to go thru on my way to work which involves heavy traffic merging into one lane, and people are constantly cutting each other off. I'd come to dread that part of my morning commute b/c of what I'd witness. One particularly traffic-heavy morning, I almost get run off the road not once but TWICE by a little sports car w/ an attitude and find myself absolutely fuming all the way to work. In my anger, I decide I'm never going that way again--even if it is the most direct route--b/c I never care to start my day with that level of anxiety again. I plan a less direct route on a main road which involves at least a dozen traffic lights, accepting that this will mean it will take me longer to get to work, but will be worth it. A couple hours later I hear His prodding, " So what joy came out of that situation? " Somewhat begrudgingly, I find myself mentally replying with, " I'll get to enjoy a new drive to work from now on. " The next day I drive to work, utterly shocked to find every single one of those lights to be green and hardly ANY traffic. I really DID enjoy my drive and arrived within 5 min of my norm. And like you implied below, those moments of joy are often so much better than any food I could have stuffed down when not hungry. A big toothless grin from my infant son brings just as much, if not more, joy than chocolate--THAT'S saying something! I love knowing more than one of us is on this journey of joy--b/c it's there to be had in many more situations than we ever thought possible. And it's helping me to come out of what I now recogize had become a mild state of depression. Suddenly I'm feeling hopeful--in everything from my body, to my family, to the path God's laid out for me. I truly am blessed, as it sounds like you are as well. Keep searching for that joy, my friend--let no one take it from you! IE since 2011 To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Sunday, January 29, 2012 12:10 PM Subject: Re: Struggling A Bit  This post may sound like it has nothing to do with intuitive eating, yet for my entire life my eating has had to do with any and everything in addition to needing nourishment. So does it follow that if I let go of filling non-physical needs with food, that I have to replace it with something? This post may sound like I'm a little crazy (maybe I am!), but this is hitting the place where the emptiness is. I spent a lot of time last night trying to determine what the emptiness is that I want to fill by buying bags of groceries. It is not an empty stomach. My body was nourished. But I didn't have the mounds of food covering the non-physical part of me. That for me feels naked, in a sense, and I was wanting to cover up. Does that even make sense? It was this morning as I picked up a study group book to read the next chapter that I knew. It is emptiness within my soul. I think I actually already knew this. But I didn't really know how to fill that emptiness. Now I do. When I was going through divorce, someone told me to look for small moments of joy in each day, even in my pain. I did that enough to know that when I do this, I am filled with peace and joy. It is a place that no fresh-baked slice of lemon meringe pie could come close to touching. That is it. It is simply to look for these moments in everything I do. The answer is right here. All I have to do is to stop and fill up with it. But in the hecticness of living in the 21st century, I forget to let myself be filled with these things, to even notice them. So here is what is filling me thus far today: the brilliant winter sun casting sharp shadows of naked tree branches against my neighbor's white-planked house the aroma of a hot mug of sweet jasmine tea the squeak of the front door announcing the arrival of two of my sons the graceful way tall pine trees outside my window move in today's strong wind the feel of my ultra-soft robe against my skin the distant sound of wind-chimes tinkling a few hours of solitude at home Sara > > > > Do you need food? > > > > Ellie > > > > > > > > >________________________________ > > > From: sarab80753 <sarab80753@> > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2012 Report Share Posted January 29, 2012 , did you know that the name " Ananda " , a version of your name, means " that joy without which the universe would cease to exist " ? I'll have to find my reference for that although I have read it in more than one place. I'm pretty sure one of them was in the(found it) " The Time Quartet " by Madeleine L'Engle. It's Sanskrit meaning more exactly " that joy in existence without which the universe would fall apart and collapse " . It comes from the " Swiftly Tilting Planet " book in the quartet. WOW! Great name. Sandy  Wow--completely relate! In fact, I got goose bumps when you said what you did about finding the joy in everyday life b/c God has been repeating this message to me several times a day over the last couple weeks and I've been amazed at the effect it has on my emotions. For instance, there's an intersection I have to go thru on my way to work which involves heavy traffic merging into one lane, and people are constantly cutting each other off. I'd come to dread that part of my morning commute b/c of what I'd witness. One particularly traffic-heavy morning, I almost get run off the road not once but TWICE by a little sports car w/ an attitude and find myself absolutely fuming all the way to work. In my anger, I decide I'm never going that way again--even if it is the most direct route--b/c I never care to start my day with that level of anxiety again. I plan a less direct route on a main road which involves at least a dozen traffic lights, accepting that this will mean it will take me longer to get to work, but will be worth it. A couple hours later I hear His prodding, " So what joy came out of that situation? " Somewhat begrudgingly, I find myself mentally replying with, " I'll get to enjoy a new drive to work from now on. " The next day I drive to work, utterly shocked to find every single one of those lights to be green and hardly ANY traffic. I really DID enjoy my drive and arrived within 5 min of my norm. And like you implied below, those moments of joy are often so much better than any food I could have stuffed down when not hungry. A big toothless grin from my infant son brings just as much, if not more, joy than chocolate--THAT'S saying something! I love knowing more than one of us is on this journey of joy--b/c it's there to be had in many more situations than we ever thought possible. And it's helping me to come out of what I now recogize had become a mild state of depression. Suddenly I'm feeling hopeful--in everything from my body, to my family, to the path God's laid out for me. I truly am blessed, as it sounds like you are as well. Keep searching for that joy, my friend--let no one take it from you! IE since 2011 To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Sunday, January 29, 2012 12:10 PM Subject: Re: Struggling A Bit  This post may sound like it has nothing to do with intuitive eating, yet for my entire life my eating has had to do with any and everything in addition to needing nourishment. So does it follow that if I let go of filling non-physical needs with food, that I have to replace it with something? This post may sound like I'm a little crazy (maybe I am!), but this is hitting the place where the emptiness is. I spent a lot of time last night trying to determine what the emptiness is that I want to fill by buying bags of groceries. It is not an empty stomach. My body was nourished. But I didn't have the mounds of food covering the non-physical part of me. That for me feels naked, in a sense, and I was wanting to cover up. Does that even make sense? It was this morning as I picked up a study group book to read the next chapter that I knew. It is emptiness within my soul. I think I actually already knew this. But I didn't really know how to fill that emptiness. Now I do. When I was going through divorce, someone told me to look for small moments of joy in each day, even in my pain. I did that enough to know that when I do this, I am filled with peace and joy. It is a place that no fresh-baked slice of lemon meringe pie could come close to touching. That is it. It is simply to look for these moments in everything I do. The answer is right here. All I have to do is to stop and fill up with it. But in the hecticness of living in the 21st century, I forget to let myself be filled with these things, to even notice them. So here is what is filling me thus far today: the brilliant winter sun casting sharp shadows of naked tree branches against my neighbor's white-planked house the aroma of a hot mug of sweet jasmine tea the squeak of the front door announcing the arrival of two of my sons the graceful way tall pine trees outside my window move in today's strong wind the feel of my ultra-soft robe against my skin the distant sound of wind-chimes tinkling a few hours of solitude at home Sara > > > > Do you need food? > > > > Ellie > > > > > > > > >________________________________ > > > From: sarab80753 <sarab80753@> > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2012 Report Share Posted January 29, 2012 Sandy, thanks SO much for sharing this! Makes the journey all the more meaningful! =o) To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Sunday, January 29, 2012 7:19 PM Subject: Re: Re: Struggling A Bit , did you know that the name "Ananda", a version of your name, means "that joy without which the universe would cease to exist"? I'll have to find my reference for that although I have read it in more than one place. I'm pretty sure one of them was in the(found it) "The Time Quartet" by Madeleine L'Engle. It's Sanskrit meaning more exactly "that joy in existence without which the universe would fall apart and collapse". It comes from the "Swiftly Tilting Planet" book in the quartet. WOW! Great name. Sandy Wow--completely relate! In fact, I got goose bumps when you said what you did about finding the joy in everyday life b/c God has been repeating this message to me several times a day over the last couple weeks and I've been amazed at the effect it has on my emotions. For instance, there's an intersection I have to go thru on my way to work which involves heavy traffic merging into one lane, and people are constantly cutting each other off. I'd come to dread that part of my morning commute b/c of what I'd witness. One particularly traffic-heavy morning, I almost get run off the road not once but TWICE by a little sports car w/ an attitude and find myself absolutely fuming all the way to work. In my anger, I decide I'm never going that way again--even if it is the most direct route--b/c I never care to start my day with that level of anxiety again. I plan a less direct route on a main road which involves at least a dozen traffic lights, accepting that this will mean it will take me longer to get to work, but will be worth it. A couple hours later I hear His prodding, "So what joy came out of that situation?" Somewhat begrudgingly, I find myself mentally replying with, "I'll get to enjoy a new drive to work from now on." The next day I drive to work, utterly shocked to find every single one of those lights to be green and hardly ANY traffic. I really DID enjoy my drive and arrived within 5 min of my norm. And like you implied below, those moments of joy are often so much better than any food I could have stuffed down when not hungry. A big toothless grin from my infant son brings just as much, if not more, joy than chocolate--THAT'S saying something! I love knowing more than one of us is on this journey of joy--b/c it's there to be had in many more situations than we ever thought possible. And it's helping me to come out of what I now recogize had become a mild state of depression. Suddenly I'm feeling hopeful--in everything from my body, to my family, to the path God's laid out for me. I truly am blessed, as it sounds like you are as well. Keep searching for that joy, my friend--let no one take it from you! IE since 2011 To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Sunday, January 29, 2012 12:10 PM Subject: Re: Struggling A Bit This post may sound like it has nothing to do with intuitive eating, yet for my entire life my eating has had to do with any and everything in addition to needing nourishment. So does it follow that if I let go of filling non-physical needs with food, that I have to replace it with something? This post may sound like I'm a little crazy (maybe I am!), but this is hitting the place where the emptiness is. I spent a lot of time last night trying to determine what the emptiness is that I want to fill by buying bags of groceries. It is not an empty stomach. My body was nourished. But I didn't have the mounds of food covering the non-physical part of me. That for me feels naked, in a sense, and I was wanting to cover up. Does that even make sense? It was this morning as I picked up a study group book to read the next chapter that I knew. It is emptiness within my soul. I think I actually already knew this. But I didn't really know how to fill that emptiness. Now I do. When I was going through divorce, someone told me to look for small moments of joy in each day, even in my pain. I did that enough to know that when I do this, I am filled with peace and joy. It is a place that no fresh-baked slice of lemon meringe pie could come close to touching. That is it. It is simply to look for these moments in everything I do. The answer is right here. All I have to do is to stop and fill up with it. But in the hecticness of living in the 21st century, I forget to let myself be filled with these things, to even notice them. So here is what is filling me thus far today: the brilliant winter sun casting sharp shadows of naked tree branches against my neighbor's white-planked house the aroma of a hot mug of sweet jasmine tea the squeak of the front door announcing the arrival of two of my sons the graceful way tall pine trees outside my window move in today's strong wind the feel of my ultra-soft robe against my skin the distant sound of wind-chimes tinkling a few hours of solitude at home Sara > > > > Do you need food? > > > > Ellie > > > > > > > > >________________________________ > > > From: sarab80753 <sarab80753@> > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2012 Report Share Posted January 30, 2012 Yes! I love it! Being present in the here and now and having gratitude! What can be better than that! Having read your post and being reminded of these two things, its gonna be a great day! Happy Monday to all! Sent from my Verizon Wireless Phone --- Original Message --- Sent: January 29, 2012 1/29/12 To: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Struggling A Bit  This post may sound like it has nothing to do with intuitive eating, yet for my entire life my eating has had to do with any and everything in addition to needing nourishment. So does it follow that if I let go of filling non-physical needs with food, that I have to replace it with something? This post may sound like I'm a little crazy (maybe I am!), but this is hitting the place where the emptiness is. I spent a lot of time last night trying to determine what the emptiness is that I want to fill by buying bags of groceries. It is not an empty stomach. My body was nourished. But I didn't have the mounds of food covering the non-physical part of me. That for me feels naked, in a sense, and I was wanting to cover up. Does that even make sense? It was this morning as I picked up a study group book to read the next chapter that I knew. It is emptiness within my soul. I think I actually already knew this. But I didn't really know how to fill that emptiness. Now I do. When I was going through divorce, someone told me to look for small moments of joy in each day, even in my pain. I did that enough to know that when I do this, I am filled with peace and joy. It is a place that no fresh-baked slice of lemon meringe pie could come close to touching. That is it. It is simply to look for these moments in everything I do. The answer is right here. All I have to do is to stop and fill up with it. But in the hecticness of living in the 21st century, I forget to let myself be filled with these things, to even notice them. So here is what is filling me thus far today: the brilliant winter sun casting sharp shadows of naked tree branches against my neighbor's white-planked house the aroma of a hot mug of sweet jasmine tea the squeak of the front door announcing the arrival of two of my sons the graceful way tall pine trees outside my window move in today's strong wind the feel of my ultra-soft robe against my skin the distant sound of wind-chimes tinkling a few hours of solitude at home Sara > > > > Do you need food? > > > > Ellie > > > > > > > > >________________________________ > > > From: sarab80753 <sarab80753@> > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2012 Report Share Posted January 30, 2012 Lovely list! Thank you for sharing it. It reminds me that it would be a very good idea for us all to look for those moments. Tilley > > > > > > Do you need food? > > > > > > Ellie > > > > > > > > > > > > >________________________________ > > > > From: sarab80753 <sarab80753@> > > > > > > > >I've done okay with food today, but for some reason I keep thinking about going to buy food. It's almost as if I am just wanting to go through the motion of getting it and bringing it home. I need to think about this, I guess, to figure out what's going on, what it is I'm really needing. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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