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I've been keeping lots of plates in the air and have barely been breathing, let

alone participating here.

Visited nada and dd today, was waiting for one of them to make an accusation or

pour out the guilt. Nada barely made eye contact, but managed to talk over me

every chance she got. I heard how busy, important and exciting their life is

(they are homebodies). They saw my kids, we exchanged pleasantries. She wants to

spend the holiday " quietly at home. " No problem, I don't want her insanity and

play pretend at my house. I have fulfilled my obligation.

It hurts that it has to be like this, but I just cannot be her handmaid any

more.

My sister visited her this week, too. When she got back to her house she sobbed

from the stress of the day, the continual bitching and bitterness. Yet my mother

today insisted they had a wonderful, enjoyable day (i.e., 'she and I have FUN

together, what's wrong with you?').

She's estranged from her only sister, who extended another olive branch this

week ( " please can't we just make peace for the time we have left? " ), to which my

mother's reply was " I don't understand what you mean. "

In short, my nada is a bitter, hateful, lonely woman who insists she has a full,

rich life and pity the poor fool that questions her stories.

I feel very sorry for her, and alternately she scares me to death and I'm glad

to be rid of her constant negativity.

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