Guest guest Posted January 17, 2011 Report Share Posted January 17, 2011 I am new to this group. I am female 60 yo. My mother is BP, and while I have been able to manage our relationship..or at least I think so, maybe I have been kidding myself. But she has recently been much more demanding, accusatory, raging, gaslighting, threats of self-harm and generally manipulative the closer my son & dtr in law get to the delivery of my first grandchild. She is 86, while my enabling father has been deceased for 6 years. He is now a 'saint' in her recollection, although never was when he was alive. First-I wonder, why I turned out so different from her. I am very empathetic, see the world in shades of grey. My two children, are mentally healthy and did not even know my mother was BP until they reached the age of 20-25. I told her in very clear terms when I was pregnant with my first that if she behaved badly she would have no contact with my child, later children. And she held it together. So my second question is, how is that possible? If this is mental illness, that she has no control over, how could she hold it together when around them. Granted, she still acted out with my father, around me and my husband and with her friends, but if she truly could not control herself, how did she manage this? Thanks in advance for any insight. talk2me2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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