Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 Hum...I would get upset if it were me. I don't even breastfeed in front of ANY of my IL's and not in front of any MALES except my DH. I did however breastfeed in a restaurant for the first time the other night out of desperation but used the car seat as a block from people's view. I think it is personal thing and it should be up to you when and where you want to feed. I know it is easier to say 'just blow her off' and do your own thing than to actually do it...but my best wishes to you!! ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 Hum...I would get upset if it were me. I don't even breastfeed in front of ANY of my IL's and not in front of any MALES except my DH. I did however breastfeed in a restaurant for the first time the other night out of desperation but used the car seat as a block from people's view. I think it is personal thing and it should be up to you when and where you want to feed. I know it is easier to say 'just blow her off' and do your own thing than to actually do it...but my best wishes to you!! ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 Hum...I would get upset if it were me. I don't even breastfeed in front of ANY of my IL's and not in front of any MALES except my DH. I did however breastfeed in a restaurant for the first time the other night out of desperation but used the car seat as a block from people's view. I think it is personal thing and it should be up to you when and where you want to feed. I know it is easier to say 'just blow her off' and do your own thing than to actually do it...but my best wishes to you!! ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 > ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful > body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because > she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting > me on the spot. My MIL makes comments to about me not bf around them. I just don't feel comfortable around them. I get the weight comments too. She will buy me a shirt in a small and make some comment about me one day fitting into it (I have no plans on wearing a small) or ask when will I loose my pg weight (I've lost it already -- In fact, I am looking good). Hang in there and let her comments disappear into empty air. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 > ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful > body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because > she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting > me on the spot. My MIL makes comments to about me not bf around them. I just don't feel comfortable around them. I get the weight comments too. She will buy me a shirt in a small and make some comment about me one day fitting into it (I have no plans on wearing a small) or ask when will I loose my pg weight (I've lost it already -- In fact, I am looking good). Hang in there and let her comments disappear into empty air. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 You have every right to be as modest as you choose. It sounds like she is trying to put you down. Perhaps, depending on your relationship, you counter her " joking " with your own " joking " about how not everyone feels as free as she does (in a tone which implies that her attitude is inappropriate). Or suggest that it would be ok if she were to flash the neighbors to distract them during the time you are nursing. Or you could just be nice about it and say that despite the experiences of labor and delivery you retained some sense of modesty, then head inside. HTH Lynn ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 You have every right to be as modest as you choose. It sounds like she is trying to put you down. Perhaps, depending on your relationship, you counter her " joking " with your own " joking " about how not everyone feels as free as she does (in a tone which implies that her attitude is inappropriate). Or suggest that it would be ok if she were to flash the neighbors to distract them during the time you are nursing. Or you could just be nice about it and say that despite the experiences of labor and delivery you retained some sense of modesty, then head inside. HTH Lynn ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 You have every right to be as modest as you choose. It sounds like she is trying to put you down. Perhaps, depending on your relationship, you counter her " joking " with your own " joking " about how not everyone feels as free as she does (in a tone which implies that her attitude is inappropriate). Or suggest that it would be ok if she were to flash the neighbors to distract them during the time you are nursing. Or you could just be nice about it and say that despite the experiences of labor and delivery you retained some sense of modesty, then head inside. HTH Lynn ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 You know, I am like you. I sure as heck don't mind others bf'ing in public, I just am not real comfortable with it myself. Just go with what you feel. And learn how to ignore your mil real good:o) And for me..."public" is different. I mean with my family, I'm not too uncomfortable...but around many other people I am. ,~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I practice planned parenthood.......God planned them right from the very start:o)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Come join my lists....LargeLDSfamilies-subscribeegroupsfrugaltalkforlargeLDSfamilies-subscribeegroupsLDSparentsofboys-subscribeegroupsldsmomsinIdaho-subscribeegroups Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 You know, I am like you. I sure as heck don't mind others bf'ing in public, I just am not real comfortable with it myself. Just go with what you feel. And learn how to ignore your mil real good:o) And for me..."public" is different. I mean with my family, I'm not too uncomfortable...but around many other people I am. ,~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~I practice planned parenthood.......God planned them right from the very start:o)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Come join my lists....LargeLDSfamilies-subscribeegroupsfrugaltalkforlargeLDSfamilies-subscribeegroupsLDSparentsofboys-subscribeegroupsldsmomsinIdaho-subscribeegroups Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 Hi , I am with you. I would ignore the woman myself. I don't breastfeed in public. I only do it in front of close family out of necessity and only then in front of certain family. I find it hard to latch on without a blanket and nearly impossible with a blanket draped. I won't just " whip it out " except in front of my mom and sisters and husband. My mom has actually been helpful. > I have a issue with my breastfeeding privacy that is probley not the > " norm " ,my step mom expects me to whip out my breast wherever we may > be!!we were at a 4th of july gathering and literally over a thousand > people were gathered and she made fun of me because i wouldnt bf in > public.And whenever we go to visit which is at least once a week we > eat dinner outdoors and there are a few houses surrounding thiers with > others eating outside as well and she makes fun of me because i go > inside to feed the baby. i dont know wiether i am being self consious > or she is pushing me ,i have no problem with women who bf publically i > just dont feel comfortable and i have told her i dont feel comfortable > and she just laughs at me ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a > wonderful body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me > because she will always say these comments in front of others kind of > putting me on the spot. Carla Zorko, carladee@... Adam Dean Zorko (DOB: 5-9-00) http://home.earthlink.net/~gzorko Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 , I think your mom should respect you limits of comfort. If she wants you to bf in public, that's fine, but if aren't comfortable with it, she shouldn't push you. After all, it's not her breasts and body that are being exposed in public. I don't think it's anyone's business but yours. Tina Mommy to Blake born 4-2-00 visit Blake's web site at http://www.growthspurts.com/view.asp?s=20969 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 , I think your mom should respect you limits of comfort. If she wants you to bf in public, that's fine, but if aren't comfortable with it, she shouldn't push you. After all, it's not her breasts and body that are being exposed in public. I don't think it's anyone's business but yours. Tina Mommy to Blake born 4-2-00 visit Blake's web site at http://www.growthspurts.com/view.asp?s=20969 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 >From: BibleKitty@... >Reply-To: breastfeedingegroups >To: breastfeedingegroups >Subject: Re: privacy issue >Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 11:10:52 EDT > > > ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful > > body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because > > she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting > > me on the spot. >My MIL makes comments to about me not bf around them. I just don't feel >comfortable around them. I get the weight comments too. She will buy me a >shirt in a small and make some comment about me one day fitting into it (I >have no plans on wearing a small) or ask when will I loose my pg weight >(I've >lost it already -- In fact, I am looking good). Hang in there and let her >comments disappear into empty air. wow you mil sounds like a doozy!!!! my stepmom is a bit sarcastic and a know it all so i basically just have to listen to it because whenever i have tryed to say anything to her she gets defensive and nobodys opinions are correct compaired to her's and if you have different view points she thinks you are the weird one!!!and guess what...i will be moving back in with her and my dad in 2 months with my kids!!!!!!and her views on raising children are so different than mine.as long as we get past those things we shall be fine,but it will be a hard 6 months in some ways and easier for us in some ,so i just have to keep my temper under control and keep a smile and let everything go in one ear and out the other!! wish me luck cindy ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 >From: BibleKitty@... >Reply-To: breastfeedingegroups >To: breastfeedingegroups >Subject: Re: privacy issue >Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 11:10:52 EDT > > > ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful > > body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because > > she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting > > me on the spot. >My MIL makes comments to about me not bf around them. I just don't feel >comfortable around them. I get the weight comments too. She will buy me a >shirt in a small and make some comment about me one day fitting into it (I >have no plans on wearing a small) or ask when will I loose my pg weight >(I've >lost it already -- In fact, I am looking good). Hang in there and let her >comments disappear into empty air. wow you mil sounds like a doozy!!!! my stepmom is a bit sarcastic and a know it all so i basically just have to listen to it because whenever i have tryed to say anything to her she gets defensive and nobodys opinions are correct compaired to her's and if you have different view points she thinks you are the weird one!!!and guess what...i will be moving back in with her and my dad in 2 months with my kids!!!!!!and her views on raising children are so different than mine.as long as we get past those things we shall be fine,but it will be a hard 6 months in some ways and easier for us in some ,so i just have to keep my temper under control and keep a smile and let everything go in one ear and out the other!! wish me luck cindy ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 >From: BibleKitty@... >Reply-To: breastfeedingegroups >To: breastfeedingegroups >Subject: Re: privacy issue >Date: Thu, 13 Jul 2000 11:10:52 EDT > > > ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful > > body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because > > she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting > > me on the spot. >My MIL makes comments to about me not bf around them. I just don't feel >comfortable around them. I get the weight comments too. She will buy me a >shirt in a small and make some comment about me one day fitting into it (I >have no plans on wearing a small) or ask when will I loose my pg weight >(I've >lost it already -- In fact, I am looking good). Hang in there and let her >comments disappear into empty air. wow you mil sounds like a doozy!!!! my stepmom is a bit sarcastic and a know it all so i basically just have to listen to it because whenever i have tryed to say anything to her she gets defensive and nobodys opinions are correct compaired to her's and if you have different view points she thinks you are the weird one!!!and guess what...i will be moving back in with her and my dad in 2 months with my kids!!!!!!and her views on raising children are so different than mine.as long as we get past those things we shall be fine,but it will be a hard 6 months in some ways and easier for us in some ,so i just have to keep my temper under control and keep a smile and let everything go in one ear and out the other!! wish me luck cindy ________________________________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free E-mail from MSN Hotmail at http://www.hotmail.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 Perhaps in her own demented way, she is using humor to ease the discomfort of the situation. Just take her aside and gently explain that you are not comfortable nursing around acquaintances. Or blame it on the baby and say that s/he won't nurse if there are lots of people around. Tell her to consider the subject closed and refuse to discuss it with her further. There are a lot of messages in the archives about BF in public, tips on how to be less self-conscious, and ways to make it less obvious that you are nursing. Some moms never get comfortable BFIP and some have never cared a bit about it. The only reason that I learned to get comfortable was that I had older children and I could not always plan my outings or find someplace private to go. A sling helped tremendously. I was always kind of on guard that someone would say something but in 22 months of nursing, no one ever said anything negative. I did get positive comments though. Jenn -----Original Message----- From: cynthia labbe [sMTP:cynthialabbe@...] HI ladies, I have a issue with my breastfeeding privacy that is probley not the " norm " ,my step mom expects me to whip out my breast wherever we may be!!we were at a 4th of july gathering and literally over a thousand people were gathered and she made fun of me because i wouldnt bf in public. i dont know wiether i am being self consious or she is pushing me ,i have no problem with women who bf publically i just dont feel comfortable and i have told her i dont feel comfortable and she just laughs at me ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting me on the spot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 Perhaps in her own demented way, she is using humor to ease the discomfort of the situation. Just take her aside and gently explain that you are not comfortable nursing around acquaintances. Or blame it on the baby and say that s/he won't nurse if there are lots of people around. Tell her to consider the subject closed and refuse to discuss it with her further. There are a lot of messages in the archives about BF in public, tips on how to be less self-conscious, and ways to make it less obvious that you are nursing. Some moms never get comfortable BFIP and some have never cared a bit about it. The only reason that I learned to get comfortable was that I had older children and I could not always plan my outings or find someplace private to go. A sling helped tremendously. I was always kind of on guard that someone would say something but in 22 months of nursing, no one ever said anything negative. I did get positive comments though. Jenn -----Original Message----- From: cynthia labbe [sMTP:cynthialabbe@...] HI ladies, I have a issue with my breastfeeding privacy that is probley not the " norm " ,my step mom expects me to whip out my breast wherever we may be!!we were at a 4th of july gathering and literally over a thousand people were gathered and she made fun of me because i wouldnt bf in public. i dont know wiether i am being self consious or she is pushing me ,i have no problem with women who bf publically i just dont feel comfortable and i have told her i dont feel comfortable and she just laughs at me ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting me on the spot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 Perhaps in her own demented way, she is using humor to ease the discomfort of the situation. Just take her aside and gently explain that you are not comfortable nursing around acquaintances. Or blame it on the baby and say that s/he won't nurse if there are lots of people around. Tell her to consider the subject closed and refuse to discuss it with her further. There are a lot of messages in the archives about BF in public, tips on how to be less self-conscious, and ways to make it less obvious that you are nursing. Some moms never get comfortable BFIP and some have never cared a bit about it. The only reason that I learned to get comfortable was that I had older children and I could not always plan my outings or find someplace private to go. A sling helped tremendously. I was always kind of on guard that someone would say something but in 22 months of nursing, no one ever said anything negative. I did get positive comments though. Jenn -----Original Message----- From: cynthia labbe [sMTP:cynthialabbe@...] HI ladies, I have a issue with my breastfeeding privacy that is probley not the " norm " ,my step mom expects me to whip out my breast wherever we may be!!we were at a 4th of july gathering and literally over a thousand people were gathered and she made fun of me because i wouldnt bf in public. i dont know wiether i am being self consious or she is pushing me ,i have no problem with women who bf publically i just dont feel comfortable and i have told her i dont feel comfortable and she just laughs at me ,i am a chubby lady and i really dont have a wonderful body image i just feel as if she is trying to humiliate me because she will always say these comments in front of others kind of putting me on the spot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 It's too bad she just can't respect your wishes. I have no problem bfing in public but there are times I prefer to be alone as well. I went to a friends last Saturday, she nurses her toddler so I always nurse in front of her and her dh but they had relatives over I had never met before, including a couple of teenagers so the first few times I nursed my 3 month old I went into another room. The only time I didn't was when there were only us women around the kitchen table and I was more comfortable with the stranger. Michele Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 It's too bad she just can't respect your wishes. I have no problem bfing in public but there are times I prefer to be alone as well. I went to a friends last Saturday, she nurses her toddler so I always nurse in front of her and her dh but they had relatives over I had never met before, including a couple of teenagers so the first few times I nursed my 3 month old I went into another room. The only time I didn't was when there were only us women around the kitchen table and I was more comfortable with the stranger. Michele Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 It's too bad she just can't respect your wishes. I have no problem bfing in public but there are times I prefer to be alone as well. I went to a friends last Saturday, she nurses her toddler so I always nurse in front of her and her dh but they had relatives over I had never met before, including a couple of teenagers so the first few times I nursed my 3 month old I went into another room. The only time I didn't was when there were only us women around the kitchen table and I was more comfortable with the stranger. Michele Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 You should ask her why she wants to see your boobs so badly. Or tell her you'll " whip it out " if she does. S. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 : I wish there were more people in the world like your MIL!! If it really bothers you, you can always pull her aside and express this to her. Ask her to quit bugging you. I also think that you should try breastfeeding in front of a mirror. You will see that there is not a lot of skin exposed. You can practice and feel more comfortable to feed in public. It is so inconvenient to keep going inside to feed the baby, isn't it? I usually lift my shirt so the baby can latch on and let the shirt come around his face. The baby hides my belly and you can't see anything if you are looking at me straight on or from the sides. With my first I was very shy about feeding in public and that was probably one of the reasons I weaned him so early. ~ M. ~ BestFedBaby@... Wife to Demetrios SAHMommy to Elijah (4/2/98) and (11/20/99) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 13, 2000 Report Share Posted July 13, 2000 : I wish there were more people in the world like your MIL!! If it really bothers you, you can always pull her aside and express this to her. Ask her to quit bugging you. I also think that you should try breastfeeding in front of a mirror. You will see that there is not a lot of skin exposed. You can practice and feel more comfortable to feed in public. It is so inconvenient to keep going inside to feed the baby, isn't it? I usually lift my shirt so the baby can latch on and let the shirt come around his face. The baby hides my belly and you can't see anything if you are looking at me straight on or from the sides. With my first I was very shy about feeding in public and that was probably one of the reasons I weaned him so early. ~ M. ~ BestFedBaby@... Wife to Demetrios SAHMommy to Elijah (4/2/98) and (11/20/99) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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