Social Skills Training

March 15, 2010

I have a 5 year old son (HFA) that could really use some help with his social

skills , especially approaching other children and making friends.He is starting

to realize that he is having trouble making a friend.

Does anyone know of any techniques I can use to help him. Or anything that has

helped your children through something similar.Your advise and opinions are of

great value to me and will be greatly appreciated.

March 15, 2010

Maureen,

Language Link Therapy in City offers weekly pragmatic groups as well as pragmatic based camps throughout spring and summer. If you have any further questions please call the office at (954)689-0730.

To: sList Sent: Mon, March 15, 2010 11:24:30 AMSubject: Social Skills Training

I have a 5 year old son (HFA) that could really use some help with his social skills , especially approaching other children and making friends.He is starting to realize that he is having trouble making a friend. Does anyone know of any techniques I can use to help him. Or anything that has helped your children through something similar.Your advise and opinions are of great value to me and will be greatly appreciated.

March 16, 2010

One of the first things I learned as my son's parent, is that I cannot allow my issues from being 5 be any way involved with him being 5. That would be my first recommendation. Because how we feel about making friends will greatly determine how our kids make and maintain friendships.

That being said, the best way is to find a child, a friend's child, a child known in the neighborhood, a peer from school and find a common interest where the 2 could play together and you and perhaps the other parent could facilitate. Both kids will need some guidance. Or, go to the playground and take his lead in activities. However, you indicated he struggles with approaching, joining in. Perhaps give him a short script to say like, "Hi, can I play too?" or, "Hi, what are you playing?" or most times kids just join in and are not verbal about it, particularly boys. We have to be careful not to give the kids too much of what we want them to say and not what is true for little boys. Does he like active games? Can you engage him and another kid or 2 in a game of tag or chase or hide n' seek?

What has been his history with making friends in the past? It sounds like he's already had some unsuccessful experiences. Why? It's important to figure out what makes an interaction successful and to make future attempts to socialize successful. That, in itself, will be reinforcing enough to keep going.

Some peer sensitivity training may help too but be careful in how it's presented. I try to stick to all the strengths my son has and only 1 (maybe 2 at most) challenges. For example, I say my son is awesome at video games but sometimes doesn't look when a kid says, "Hi." Then I tell the kid to touch his shoulder, get closer or whatever.

This will come in stages. It's important to know what your kid's stages are in terms of social development and fill in any gaps. There are usually pre-requisite skilsl that need to be mastered before some stages.

I find the most active boys, even 1-3 years older, sometimes work better that the kids his age. Or, a kid who is 1-3 years younger even. My son is now 6 and has great relationships with the teen boys at his camp and with this little boy who is going to be 4 in July. The kids his age...he doesn't maintain very long interactions with unless in a particular context but the almost 4 year old is perfect.....for now.

From: MAUREEN

Sent: Monday, March 15, 2010 11:24 AM

To: sList

Subject: Social Skills Training

I have a 5 year old son (HFA) that could really use some help with his social skills , especially approaching other children and making friends.He is starting to realize that he is having trouble making a friend. Does anyone know of any techniques I can use to help him. Or anything that has helped your children through something similar.Your advise and opinions are of great value to me and will be greatly appreciated.

March 16, 2010

One of the first things I learned as my son's parent, is that I cannot allow my issues from being 5 be any way involved with him being 5. That would be my first recommendation. Because how we feel about making friends will greatly determine how our kids make and maintain friendships.

That being said, the best way is to find a child, a friend's child, a child known in the neighborhood, a peer from school and find a common interest where the 2 could play together and you and perhaps the other parent could facilitate. Both kids will need some guidance. Or, go to the playground and take his lead in activities. However, you indicated he struggles with approaching, joining in. Perhaps give him a short script to say like, "Hi, can I play too?" or, "Hi, what are you playing?" or most times kids just join in and are not verbal about it, particularly boys. We have to be careful not to give the kids too much of what we want them to say and not what is true for little boys. Does he like active games? Can you engage him and another kid or 2 in a game of tag or chase or hide n' seek?

What has been his history with making friends in the past? It sounds like he's already had some unsuccessful experiences. Why? It's important to figure out what makes an interaction successful and to make future attempts to socialize successful. That, in itself, will be reinforcing enough to keep going.

Some peer sensitivity training may help too but be careful in how it's presented. I try to stick to all the strengths my son has and only 1 (maybe 2 at most) challenges. For example, I say my son is awesome at video games but sometimes doesn't look when a kid says, "Hi." Then I tell the kid to touch his shoulder, get closer or whatever.

This will come in stages. It's important to know what your kid's stages are in terms of social development and fill in any gaps. There are usually pre-requisite skilsl that need to be mastered before some stages.

I find the most active boys, even 1-3 years older, sometimes work better that the kids his age. Or, a kid who is 1-3 years younger even. My son is now 6 and has great relationships with the teen boys at his camp and with this little boy who is going to be 4 in July. The kids his age...he doesn't maintain very long interactions with unless in a particular context but the almost 4 year old is perfect.....for now.

From: MAUREEN

Sent: Monday, March 15, 2010 11:24 AM

To: sList

Subject: Social Skills Training

I have a 5 year old son (HFA) that could really use some help with his social skills , especially approaching other children and making friends.He is starting to realize that he is having trouble making a friend. Does anyone know of any techniques I can use to help him. Or anything that has helped your children through something similar.Your advise and opinions are of great value to me and will be greatly appreciated.

March 17, 2010

Super Skills by Judith CoucouvanisSOS by DunnBuilding Social Relationships by BelliniSocial Skills Picture Book by Jed BakerSocial Skills Training by Jed BakerUse video modeling. In particular video the child when he's doing it the right or expected way. I use my iPhone to video my son all the time and it's been a great tool. Or to video other kids in successful interactions or role playing. Sent from my iPhone

---------- Forwarded message ----------From: Margie Pedron <blastmpgmail>Date: Wed, Mar 17, 2010 at 10:45 AM

Subject: Re: Social Skills TrainingTo: sList Hi Maureen,Check out B.LA.S.T. Educational Services in Coral Springs

www.blastedu.comOur next session is starting on April 5th and runs through June 11If you have any further questions please do not hesitate to contact me

-- Margie PedronB.L.A.S.T. Educational Serviceswww.blastedu.comphone:

fax: On Mon, Mar 15, 2010 at 11:24 AM, MAUREEN <maureen8030> wrote:

I have a 5 year old son (HFA) that could really use some help with his social skills , especially approaching other children and making friends.He is starting to realize that he is having trouble making a friend.

Does anyone know of any techniques I can use to help him. Or anything that has helped your children through something similar.Your advise and opinions are of great value to me and will be greatly appreciated.

-- Margie PedronB.L.A.S.T. Educational Serviceswww.blastedu.com

phone: fax:

-- Margie PedronB.L.A.S.T. Educational Serviceswww.blastedu.comphone: fax:

March 17, 2010