how to cope in a world not built for us

[Guest guest]

I just experienced yet another embarrassing public moment with my son, and its moments like these that drive home the reality that this world is not always built for us. Not every place or situation is accommodating for our kids, and like many of you I wish that more people understood what it is like for children with autism. I refuse to keep my son locked in the house, I want him to experience things and enjoy activities just like other children. I know our limitations, and try to avoid events that I know ahead of time are not going to work well for us. But I still want to continue to try new things from time to time to provide exposure and give my son a chance. My son is 6, and he has a severe delay in speech & cognition. (Its much like having a 2 yr old trapped in a 6 yr old's body.) So

when he doesn't understand or is trying to cope with sensory issues, to a stranger viewing us at a glance it may seem as though he is just a very defiant child, or that I am a bad parent. Do you have any advice for dealing with situations where we end up becoming a spectacle b/c of a meltdown or sensitivity to over stimulation? Its easy to say "you shouldn't care about what other people think" But I still feel embarrassed and sad when we have those moments. As much as I celebrate my son's successes and enjoy seeing him achieve a milestone or goal, it is as equally depressing for me when I am hit with the cold reality that we still can not do some typical activities. I love my son very much, and am extremely proud of him. I would never wish he were someone else, but I do wish the world would be more understanding, compassionate and less judgmental.