There is no such thing as perfection

[Guest guest]

There is no such thing as perfection – therefore stop trying to be perfect.

You don't have to have hair a certain color, or a flawless skin, lots of Christmas presents, or a man or woman hanging off you, to be the perfect person. Why? Because there is no such thing as perfection. There is no person in this world who is perfect, NO-ONE. Not your mum, your priest or your celebrity film star. No-one is perfect. The advertisements are lying to you and have been lying to you for years. Advertisers simply want you to feel inadequate and pretend that perfection exists so that you will buy from them and make them rich. They have been wearing away at your confidence for years, and they have been so successful that you have started seeking something that doesn't exist, perfection. Now you know that, you can stop searching for perfection and just be yourself.

Tip 2. Say thank you for what you DO have

Often we feel inadequate because we focus on what we don't have, on what we think is missing in our lives. This only makes us feel worse. Instead, start looking around and seeing what you do have. Do you have legs that can walk or eyes that can see? Then you are one of the lucky ones. Say thank you. Do you have a roof over your head, a flushing toilet and water to drink, then you are one of the lucky ones. Say thank you. Do you have friends, or a pet, or a garden? Then you are one of the lucky ones. Say thank you. Do you have just one Christmas card or Christmas present? Then say thank you. When you focus on what you do have you will feel more confident and more adequate.

Tip 3: Confidence and beauty can also grow when we are kind and generous to others.

Being kind to people, giving them unexpected presents, doing something for them that makes their life easier – can all bring joy and help you feel more adequate. The joy does not just belong to the person receiving it but to the giver, i.e. you. So if you feel bad about yourself – go and do something kind for someone and watch the effect you have on people. Their joy can become your joy. Their confidence can become your confidence.I will always remember one night being at a friend's place, her husband was seriously ill and she had been on an emotional roller coaster of despair for months. At the end of the night she came up and said how wonderful my blouse was – it was full of sparkling colors and was bright turquoise. I said, "Why don’t you try it on?" I took it off and she put it on. Well it fitted her perfectly and she loved it. So I said, "I want you to have it." "I can't take it from you" she protested. However, everyone rallied round and supported her in taking it – and in the end she was laughing and laughing, and I went home minus my best blouse! What was wonderful was that I was also laughing about it for days - I was as delighted as she was. I felt so good. I had brought just a tiny ray of sunshine into her world. Did I feel good about myself? You bet! Do kind things this Christmas and New Year and it will help you to feel good about yourself. Let your confidence grow.