Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 Hi Eileen, I think this is a perfect place to talk about such issues! I'm just wondering if you know what is going on that is making you want to turn to food right now. Could it possibly be your way of dealing with the anger you might be feeling at your husband for his absence? Jeanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 I feel like when my husband is gone, I tend to eat out of loneliness. I like time alone, but in the evenings I am lonely and want to eat if he isn't there. Hi Eileen, I think this is a perfect place to talk about such issues! I'm just wondering if you know what is going on that is making you want to turn to food right now. Could it possibly be your way of dealing with the anger you might be feeling at your husband for his absence? Jeanne -- Sue on FritzCheck out my blogs at: http://alifeofbooks.blogspot.com/http://suesresearch.blogspot.com http://suesretirementmusings.blogspot.com/Check out my books on Goodreads: < Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 I feel like when my husband is gone, I tend to eat out of loneliness. I like time alone, but in the evenings I am lonely and want to eat if he isn't there. Hi Eileen, I think this is a perfect place to talk about such issues! I'm just wondering if you know what is going on that is making you want to turn to food right now. Could it possibly be your way of dealing with the anger you might be feeling at your husband for his absence? Jeanne -- Sue on FritzCheck out my blogs at: http://alifeofbooks.blogspot.com/http://suesresearch.blogspot.com http://suesretirementmusings.blogspot.com/Check out my books on Goodreads: < Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 I feel like when my husband is gone, I tend to eat out of loneliness. I like time alone, but in the evenings I am lonely and want to eat if he isn't there. Hi Eileen, I think this is a perfect place to talk about such issues! I'm just wondering if you know what is going on that is making you want to turn to food right now. Could it possibly be your way of dealing with the anger you might be feeling at your husband for his absence? Jeanne -- Sue on FritzCheck out my blogs at: http://alifeofbooks.blogspot.com/http://suesresearch.blogspot.com http://suesretirementmusings.blogspot.com/Check out my books on Goodreads: < Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 Sugar is a big struggle for me. The IE is doing very well otherwise, and I'm not having trouble stopping when I'm full, but sugar has always been a big trigger for me. What I'm trying to do is have sugary foods after meals as much as possible, and if I do binge, not to beat myself up over it. Instead, I'm trying to focus on how it makes me feel physically (yucky) and also to pay attention to how binges are going over time. I'm seeing that the binges are starting to be farther apart and not as intense, so that whereas I might have binged for a week in the past, now it's two days and much less food. I don't binge to the point of being almost sick anymore (and I used to be bulimic, so that is a big deal for me)--just being uncomfortably full is enough. So my advice is to focus on how well you do IE when you're not on a binge. Don't feel guilty if you do binge--this is a not a quick-fix deal. Notice how your binging changes over time. And if you're craving sugar, have it, but have a meal with some protein first. Things do get better. Sohni I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing myself, etc. for at least two weeks. Was getting cocky about it, I think. Because now I find myself overeating sugar, obsessing about getting to the store to buy more and eat it while everyone is out of the house. This started Sunday so it's been two days. Husband is leaving today until Friday and I'm thinking about all the sugary things I can eat. Gives me an idea what a cocaine addiction must be like! Sort of the same idea, white, powdery substance that goes in the mouth instead of up the nose. He will be away next week too. How do I manage all the alone time and stay away from the store. Oh yeah, yesterday I bought a half gallon of ice cream and it's mostly gone. Fudge topping, too. I don't feel very well today either, like I'm hung over. Does anyone have strategies I can try? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 Eileen, Yes, it's totally fine and great to bring this issue up. I think Sohni's advice is excellent. Also... What would happen if you bought ice cream and other sugary foods and ate them in plain sight of your husband? I wonder if you are making him your conscience, like your personal Jiminy Cricket. If you eat calmly and shamelessly in front of him, I wonder if that wouldn't take away some of the forbidden-ness? That's assuming he's supportive, of course. But if you take him out of the role of ice cream monitor that puts the power back in your court, where YOU get to decide how much ice cream is right for you, ideally by listening to your body and not your conscience. This is something I have tried myself, so that I wouldn't eat in secret. Takes away the thrill of the forbidden. No one is nearly as interested in what we eat as we are (sorry my grammar is imprecise). I didn't read this in a book so I don't know if it's IE approved but it's worked well for me. Best, Abby I can honestly say I've aborted plain table sugar! I am an addict!Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry Date: Tue, 18 May 2010 13:59:57 -0000To: <IntuitiveEating_Support >Subject: I need some help I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing m... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 Eileen, Yes, it's totally fine and great to bring this issue up. I think Sohni's advice is excellent. Also... What would happen if you bought ice cream and other sugary foods and ate them in plain sight of your husband? I wonder if you are making him your conscience, like your personal Jiminy Cricket. If you eat calmly and shamelessly in front of him, I wonder if that wouldn't take away some of the forbidden-ness? That's assuming he's supportive, of course. But if you take him out of the role of ice cream monitor that puts the power back in your court, where YOU get to decide how much ice cream is right for you, ideally by listening to your body and not your conscience. This is something I have tried myself, so that I wouldn't eat in secret. Takes away the thrill of the forbidden. No one is nearly as interested in what we eat as we are (sorry my grammar is imprecise). I didn't read this in a book so I don't know if it's IE approved but it's worked well for me. Best, Abby I can honestly say I've aborted plain table sugar! I am an addict!Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry Date: Tue, 18 May 2010 13:59:57 -0000To: <IntuitiveEating_Support >Subject: I need some help I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing m... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2010 Report Share Posted May 18, 2010 Eileen, Yes, it's totally fine and great to bring this issue up. I think Sohni's advice is excellent. Also... What would happen if you bought ice cream and other sugary foods and ate them in plain sight of your husband? I wonder if you are making him your conscience, like your personal Jiminy Cricket. If you eat calmly and shamelessly in front of him, I wonder if that wouldn't take away some of the forbidden-ness? That's assuming he's supportive, of course. But if you take him out of the role of ice cream monitor that puts the power back in your court, where YOU get to decide how much ice cream is right for you, ideally by listening to your body and not your conscience. This is something I have tried myself, so that I wouldn't eat in secret. Takes away the thrill of the forbidden. No one is nearly as interested in what we eat as we are (sorry my grammar is imprecise). I didn't read this in a book so I don't know if it's IE approved but it's worked well for me. Best, Abby I can honestly say I've aborted plain table sugar! I am an addict!Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry Date: Tue, 18 May 2010 13:59:57 -0000To: <IntuitiveEating_Support >Subject: I need some help I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing m... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2010 Report Share Posted May 19, 2010 Thanks for all the great responses. It does help to talk about it though it is terribly embarrassing for me to admit the major binges I have. I learned to binge a LONG time ago and as Geneen would say, I'm still seeing the world through childlike eyes. Stories from my childhood still affect me even at my age (52). Geneen's book is helping me see that I need to put aside these childhood stories since they can't affect me anymore. Someone else who mentions this in a more spiritual way is Joyce Meyer in her book " Battlefield of the mind " . I am going to have to do more reading and thinking, less dieting and exercise. (I love to exercise but a back injury is keeping me from the gym). I love the idea of the puppy! I am on my third Newfoundland dog - the first two are gone now but I never had more devoted friends. I am thinking of adding another male newfie to our house at the right time. I was reading Geneen last night and that helped. I still binged again though. Was wondering if any of you can recommend any of her podcasts or dvds??? > > I think it is great you're talking about this and reaching out! Probably a lot of us in this group binge. I know I've done it, usually in secret because of the shame I'd feel if anyone saw me stuff my face with those cream-filled donuts. Through IE, I've finally come to realize and accept that I've coped with life and feelings by eating/overeating. > > How do manage your time alone? I can so empathize with that because my husband traveled a lot the first two years we were married. I still overate, but believe it or not, the thing that helped me most was when a friend of ours gave us a puppy. That may not be a good option for you. But I think talking out what you're feeling can help. And if you do binge, don't be too hard on yourself, maybe they can also be good learning experiences. > > Good luck! > > Jeanne > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2010 Report Share Posted May 19, 2010 Thanks for all the great responses. It does help to talk about it though it is terribly embarrassing for me to admit the major binges I have. I learned to binge a LONG time ago and as Geneen would say, I'm still seeing the world through childlike eyes. Stories from my childhood still affect me even at my age (52). Geneen's book is helping me see that I need to put aside these childhood stories since they can't affect me anymore. Someone else who mentions this in a more spiritual way is Joyce Meyer in her book " Battlefield of the mind " . I am going to have to do more reading and thinking, less dieting and exercise. (I love to exercise but a back injury is keeping me from the gym). I love the idea of the puppy! I am on my third Newfoundland dog - the first two are gone now but I never had more devoted friends. I am thinking of adding another male newfie to our house at the right time. I was reading Geneen last night and that helped. I still binged again though. Was wondering if any of you can recommend any of her podcasts or dvds??? > > I think it is great you're talking about this and reaching out! Probably a lot of us in this group binge. I know I've done it, usually in secret because of the shame I'd feel if anyone saw me stuff my face with those cream-filled donuts. Through IE, I've finally come to realize and accept that I've coped with life and feelings by eating/overeating. > > How do manage your time alone? I can so empathize with that because my husband traveled a lot the first two years we were married. I still overate, but believe it or not, the thing that helped me most was when a friend of ours gave us a puppy. That may not be a good option for you. But I think talking out what you're feeling can help. And if you do binge, don't be too hard on yourself, maybe they can also be good learning experiences. > > Good luck! > > Jeanne > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2010 Report Share Posted May 19, 2010 Sohni, That is awesome! You are an inspiration to me as I am a recovering bulimic with the same vice. Keep up the great work!!! - Kay To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, May 18, 2010 3:26:03 PMSubject: Re: I need some help Sugar is a big struggle for me. The IE is doing very well otherwise, and I'm not having trouble stopping when I'm full, but sugar has always been a big trigger for me. What I'm trying to do is have sugary foods after meals as much as possible, and if I do binge, not to beat myself up over it. Instead, I'm trying to focus on how it makes me feel physically (yucky) and also to pay attention to how binges are going over time. I'm seeing that the binges are starting to be farther apart and not as intense, so that whereas I might have binged for a week in the past, now it's two days and much less food. I don't binge to the point of being almost sick anymore (and I used to be bulimic, so that is a big deal for me)--just being uncomfortably full is enough.So my advice is to focus on how well you do IE when you're not on a binge. Don't feel guilty if you do binge--this is a not a quick-fix deal. Notice how your binging changes over time. And if you're craving sugar, have it, but have a meal with some protein first. Things do get better.Sohni I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing myself, etc. for at least two weeks. Was getting cocky about it, I think. Because now I find myself overeating sugar, obsessing about getting to the store to buy more and eat it while everyone is out of the house. This started Sunday so it's been two days.Husband is leaving today until Friday and I'm thinking about all the sugary things I can eat. Gives me an idea what a cocaine addiction must be like! Sort of the same idea, white, powdery substance that goes in the mouth instead of up the nose. He will be away next week too. How do I manage all the alone time and stay away from the store. Oh yeah, yesterday I bought a half gallon of ice cream and it's mostly gone. Fudge topping, too. I don't feel very well today either, like I'm hung over. Does anyone have strategies I can try? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2010 Report Share Posted May 19, 2010 Sohni, That is awesome! You are an inspiration to me as I am a recovering bulimic with the same vice. Keep up the great work!!! - Kay To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, May 18, 2010 3:26:03 PMSubject: Re: I need some help Sugar is a big struggle for me. The IE is doing very well otherwise, and I'm not having trouble stopping when I'm full, but sugar has always been a big trigger for me. What I'm trying to do is have sugary foods after meals as much as possible, and if I do binge, not to beat myself up over it. Instead, I'm trying to focus on how it makes me feel physically (yucky) and also to pay attention to how binges are going over time. I'm seeing that the binges are starting to be farther apart and not as intense, so that whereas I might have binged for a week in the past, now it's two days and much less food. I don't binge to the point of being almost sick anymore (and I used to be bulimic, so that is a big deal for me)--just being uncomfortably full is enough.So my advice is to focus on how well you do IE when you're not on a binge. Don't feel guilty if you do binge--this is a not a quick-fix deal. Notice how your binging changes over time. And if you're craving sugar, have it, but have a meal with some protein first. Things do get better.Sohni I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing myself, etc. for at least two weeks. Was getting cocky about it, I think. Because now I find myself overeating sugar, obsessing about getting to the store to buy more and eat it while everyone is out of the house. This started Sunday so it's been two days.Husband is leaving today until Friday and I'm thinking about all the sugary things I can eat. Gives me an idea what a cocaine addiction must be like! Sort of the same idea, white, powdery substance that goes in the mouth instead of up the nose. He will be away next week too. How do I manage all the alone time and stay away from the store. Oh yeah, yesterday I bought a half gallon of ice cream and it's mostly gone. Fudge topping, too. I don't feel very well today either, like I'm hung over. Does anyone have strategies I can try? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 20, 2010 Report Share Posted May 20, 2010 Hi , I haven't been bulimic for about 20 years now (wow, that long!), so the urge to purge (lol) is really no longer there, but it's been a long, gradual process to reset the point where where I'm uncomfortably full. It used to be 10, now it's probably a 7. I know that seems like a really long time, but of course there's been periods where I was dieting/restricting, so it's been a chopped-up journey. Sohni  Sohni,  That is awesome! You are an inspiration to me as I am a recovering bulimic with the same vice. Keep up the great work!!!  - Kay From: jeanniet58 <jeanniet58gmail> To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, May 18, 2010 3:26:03 PM Subject: Re: I need some help  Sugar is a big struggle for me. The IE is doing very well otherwise, and I'm not having trouble stopping when I'm full, but sugar has always been a big trigger for me. What I'm trying to do is have sugary foods after meals as much as possible, and if I do binge, not to beat myself up over it. Instead, I'm trying to focus on how it makes me feel physically (yucky) and also to pay attention to how binges are going over time. I'm seeing that the binges are starting to be farther apart and not as intense, so that whereas I might have binged for a week in the past, now it's two days and much less food. I don't binge to the point of being almost sick anymore (and I used to be bulimic, so that is a big deal for me)--just being uncomfortably full is enough. So my advice is to focus on how well you do IE when you're not on a binge. Don't feel guilty if you do binge--this is a not a quick-fix deal. Notice how your binging changes over time. And if you're craving sugar, have it, but have a meal with some protein first. Things do get better. Sohni  I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing myself, etc. for at least two weeks. Was getting cocky about it, I think. Because now I find myself overeating sugar, obsessing about getting to the store to buy more and eat it while everyone is out of the house. This started Sunday so it's been two days. Husband is leaving today until Friday and I'm thinking about all the sugary things I can eat. Gives me an idea what a cocaine addiction must be like! Sort of the same idea, white, powdery substance that goes in the mouth instead of up the nose. He will be away next week too. How do I manage all the alone time and stay away from the store. Oh yeah, yesterday I bought a half gallon of ice cream and it's mostly gone. Fudge topping, too. I don't feel very well today either, like I'm hung over. Does anyone have strategies I can try? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 20, 2010 Report Share Posted May 20, 2010 Hi , I haven't been bulimic for about 20 years now (wow, that long!), so the urge to purge (lol) is really no longer there, but it's been a long, gradual process to reset the point where where I'm uncomfortably full. It used to be 10, now it's probably a 7. I know that seems like a really long time, but of course there's been periods where I was dieting/restricting, so it's been a chopped-up journey. Sohni  Sohni,  That is awesome! You are an inspiration to me as I am a recovering bulimic with the same vice. Keep up the great work!!!  - Kay From: jeanniet58 <jeanniet58gmail> To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, May 18, 2010 3:26:03 PM Subject: Re: I need some help  Sugar is a big struggle for me. The IE is doing very well otherwise, and I'm not having trouble stopping when I'm full, but sugar has always been a big trigger for me. What I'm trying to do is have sugary foods after meals as much as possible, and if I do binge, not to beat myself up over it. Instead, I'm trying to focus on how it makes me feel physically (yucky) and also to pay attention to how binges are going over time. I'm seeing that the binges are starting to be farther apart and not as intense, so that whereas I might have binged for a week in the past, now it's two days and much less food. I don't binge to the point of being almost sick anymore (and I used to be bulimic, so that is a big deal for me)--just being uncomfortably full is enough. So my advice is to focus on how well you do IE when you're not on a binge. Don't feel guilty if you do binge--this is a not a quick-fix deal. Notice how your binging changes over time. And if you're craving sugar, have it, but have a meal with some protein first. Things do get better. Sohni  I hope it's okay to talk about this. I was doing pretty well not food obsessing or weighing myself, etc. for at least two weeks. Was getting cocky about it, I think. Because now I find myself overeating sugar, obsessing about getting to the store to buy more and eat it while everyone is out of the house. This started Sunday so it's been two days. Husband is leaving today until Friday and I'm thinking about all the sugary things I can eat. Gives me an idea what a cocaine addiction must be like! Sort of the same idea, white, powdery substance that goes in the mouth instead of up the nose. He will be away next week too. How do I manage all the alone time and stay away from the store. Oh yeah, yesterday I bought a half gallon of ice cream and it's mostly gone. Fudge topping, too. I don't feel very well today either, like I'm hung over. Does anyone have strategies I can try? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 21, 2010 Report Share Posted May 21, 2010 Me, me, me!!!! I totally do this. My husband travels A LOT for work. (30 of 52 weeks last year) When I found myself in the pantry asking what would make me feel better was a light bulb moment for me. I wasn't hungry, I was lonely and depressed. Don't know that I have advice, but I can tell you I understand.Dawn Hi Eileen, I think this is a perfect place to talk about such issues! I'm just wondering if you know what is going on that is making you want to turn to food right now. Could it possibly be your way of dealing with the anger you might be feeling at your husband for his absence? Jeanne -- Sue on FritzCheck out my blogs at: http://alifeofbooks .blogspot. com/http://suesresearch .blogspot. com http://suesretireme ntmusings. blogspot. com/Check out my books on Goodreads: < Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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