RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

[Guest guest]

Beautifully said and explained, !As for the fear of losing weight, Laurie... I think that so many of us have found that dieting through restriction didnt make us lose weight, it made us GAIN weight. and so we believe that getting more in touch will help us find our natural weight. (but it doesn't necessarily happen right away. )

put another way, listening to external cues about when and what we should eat didnt work, so then why not listen to what our bodies tell us? surely they know what they are talking about. 

 

Hi Laurie,  Welcome back!   It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board.  Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue.  I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought, well, who knows she might be debating against me!

Laurie,I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the glitter off of it--so it feels like " ordinary " food.If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then messes up my eating schedule/routine.

If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n' m's.  So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not satisfied.  This is because I haven't listened to what my body really wanted.  It might have wanted a  " butterfinger " or spaghetti (who knows).

A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler chocolate chip oatmeal cookies.  (I think I stopped at 11 )   These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was acceptable.)    I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there are three rows) and I still wanted more!   What I did during that meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed and savored them.  Once I had given myself full  permission, I was able to hear my natural limit

and actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the table.Afterwards,  I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them.  I wanted a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went to two stores to find them.   I purchased three packages.

What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are still sitting untouched  in our cupboard.   I remember how delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up.  When this happens, I will  get to enjoy them again.

My point here, is that abundance is more " a state of mind, " which we can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up.      

   >> Hi Everyone, > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the earth!!!  I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.

> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > As far as food goes..wow..it's much more of a challenge when my level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me sometimes!!

> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would need to get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol.  I have zero will to stop eating!!!  But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm not doing that.  I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next day.  So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body that's already big.  I'm not beating myself up.

> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain.  I have certain foods that are still " special " and I have no will power to eat a " normal " amount.  Lots of foods, that I used to restrict,  I can have and not overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now.  I think the goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid it forever.   But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I don't stop at a

> normal amount.  > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's so good for me.  If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then there are foods that are still " special " so how can I be the normal eater I want to be around those foods?

> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > Laurie>

[Guest guest]

Beautifully said and explained, !As for the fear of losing weight, Laurie... I think that so many of us have found that dieting through restriction didnt make us lose weight, it made us GAIN weight. and so we believe that getting more in touch will help us find our natural weight. (but it doesn't necessarily happen right away. )

put another way, listening to external cues about when and what we should eat didnt work, so then why not listen to what our bodies tell us? surely they know what they are talking about. 

 

Hi Laurie,  Welcome back!   It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board.  Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue.  I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought, well, who knows she might be debating against me!

Laurie,I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the glitter off of it--so it feels like " ordinary " food.If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then messes up my eating schedule/routine.

If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n' m's.  So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not satisfied.  This is because I haven't listened to what my body really wanted.  It might have wanted a  " butterfinger " or spaghetti (who knows).

A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler chocolate chip oatmeal cookies.  (I think I stopped at 11 )   These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was acceptable.)    I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there are three rows) and I still wanted more!   What I did during that meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed and savored them.  Once I had given myself full  permission, I was able to hear my natural limit

and actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the table.Afterwards,  I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them.  I wanted a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went to two stores to find them.   I purchased three packages.

What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are still sitting untouched  in our cupboard.   I remember how delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up.  When this happens, I will  get to enjoy them again.

My point here, is that abundance is more " a state of mind, " which we can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up.      

   >> Hi Everyone, > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the earth!!!  I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.

> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > As far as food goes..wow..it's much more of a challenge when my level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me sometimes!!

> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would need to get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol.  I have zero will to stop eating!!!  But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm not doing that.  I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next day.  So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body that's already big.  I'm not beating myself up.

> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain.  I have certain foods that are still " special " and I have no will power to eat a " normal " amount.  Lots of foods, that I used to restrict,  I can have and not overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now.  I think the goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid it forever.   But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I don't stop at a

> normal amount.  > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's so good for me.  If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then there are foods that are still " special " so how can I be the normal eater I want to be around those foods?

> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > Laurie>

[Guest guest]

Beautifully said and explained, !As for the fear of losing weight, Laurie... I think that so many of us have found that dieting through restriction didnt make us lose weight, it made us GAIN weight. and so we believe that getting more in touch will help us find our natural weight. (but it doesn't necessarily happen right away. )

put another way, listening to external cues about when and what we should eat didnt work, so then why not listen to what our bodies tell us? surely they know what they are talking about. 

 

Hi Laurie,  Welcome back!   It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board.  Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue.  I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought, well, who knows she might be debating against me!

Laurie,I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the glitter off of it--so it feels like " ordinary " food.If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then messes up my eating schedule/routine.

If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n' m's.  So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not satisfied.  This is because I haven't listened to what my body really wanted.  It might have wanted a  " butterfinger " or spaghetti (who knows).

A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler chocolate chip oatmeal cookies.  (I think I stopped at 11 )   These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was acceptable.)    I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there are three rows) and I still wanted more!   What I did during that meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed and savored them.  Once I had given myself full  permission, I was able to hear my natural limit

and actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the table.Afterwards,  I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them.  I wanted a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went to two stores to find them.   I purchased three packages.

What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are still sitting untouched  in our cupboard.   I remember how delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up.  When this happens, I will  get to enjoy them again.

My point here, is that abundance is more " a state of mind, " which we can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up.      

   >> Hi Everyone, > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the earth!!!  I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.

> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > As far as food goes..wow..it's much more of a challenge when my level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me sometimes!!

> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would need to get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol.  I have zero will to stop eating!!!  But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm not doing that.  I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next day.  So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body that's already big.  I'm not beating myself up.

> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain.  I have certain foods that are still " special " and I have no will power to eat a " normal " amount.  Lots of foods, that I used to restrict,  I can have and not overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now.  I think the goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid it forever.   But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I don't stop at a

> normal amount.  > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's so good for me.  If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then there are foods that are still " special " so how can I be the normal eater I want to be around those foods?

> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > Laurie>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

My situation re fear of weight gain is basically that I'm a size 20 or 22 jean depending on brand, and I am honestly ok with this size, but you can all realize that I'm a big woman at this size. If I say I am accepting this size but prefer not to become much larger because really aren't I big already, wouldn't that make sense?

I've legalized lots of foods and have become this large along the way because I had deprived and dieted for 18 years and just did lots of eating to legalize formerly restricted foods. I'm glad I did it, and I accept this size, BUT I just think this is big enough for me to be and accept.

I like my body right now! but I don't want to get larger than this.

I like how I look right now and not mad at how I look, but I am mad at the way my body works; I find it's metabolism too slow from the years of dieting. I am mad that some people can eat and eat and eat and not gain any weight and my body is unforgiving in the sense that 5 extra calories will show in weight gain; I mean my body gives me no room to play with. And I'm going to be 47 so that means it won't change.

I'm not trying to be a model or buy into the ideal of beauty in our society since I consider it ridiculous, but I'm a size 20/22 and that's just what I'd like to stay; tired of weight gain; just want to be what I am and have a totally normal relationship with food without having to gain another 30lb to get that.

Laurie

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Sun, January 31, 2010 10:13:25 PMSubject: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Lori (and everyone),I am new here as well, and struggling with the same sort of dilemma... my fear of gaining weight from eating anything I want is keeping those feelings of guilt in me somwhere. I tell myself I can eat a handful of Ritz crackers, because I'm hungry and it's what I feel like eating, but afterward I binge on more, and then something else, and then more of something else. I know that that is evidence that I have not given myself complete permission to eat whatever I want to, but I'm not sure how to do that. Whenever I think I have, those feelings of anxiety and weight gain come back out of nowhere and create an urge to binge.Does anyone have any tips on how to overcome the fear of gaining weight? (I apologize if this topic has already been covered!)Thanks!Rach> > > Hi Everyone,> > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the > > earth!!! I was very busy with

paperwork and got 99% of it in; this > > upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then > > the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.> >> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> >> > As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my > > level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are > > messing with me sometimes!!> >> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and > > I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> >> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till > > about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, > > but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would need to > > get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol.

I have zero will to > > stop eating!!! But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used > > to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm > > not doing that. I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next > > day. So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, > > but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body > > that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.> >> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer > > that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but > > sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to > > be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain. I have certain > > foods that are still "special" and I have no will power to eat a > > "normal" amount. Lots of foods, that I used to

restrict, I can > > have and not overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian > > restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to > > stop eating right now. I think the goal is balance; I don't think I > > want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large > > variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm > > cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I > > avoid it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in > > a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb > > weight gain cause I don't stop at a> > normal amount.> >> > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is > > restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have > > the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary,

or whether to pick > > the salad because it's so good for me. If I could just have a > > normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then > > there are foods that are still "special" so how can I be the normal > > eater I want to be around those foods?> >> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> >> > Laurie> >>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

My situation re fear of weight gain is basically that I'm a size 20 or 22 jean depending on brand, and I am honestly ok with this size, but you can all realize that I'm a big woman at this size. If I say I am accepting this size but prefer not to become much larger because really aren't I big already, wouldn't that make sense?

I've legalized lots of foods and have become this large along the way because I had deprived and dieted for 18 years and just did lots of eating to legalize formerly restricted foods. I'm glad I did it, and I accept this size, BUT I just think this is big enough for me to be and accept.

I like my body right now! but I don't want to get larger than this.

I like how I look right now and not mad at how I look, but I am mad at the way my body works; I find it's metabolism too slow from the years of dieting. I am mad that some people can eat and eat and eat and not gain any weight and my body is unforgiving in the sense that 5 extra calories will show in weight gain; I mean my body gives me no room to play with. And I'm going to be 47 so that means it won't change.

I'm not trying to be a model or buy into the ideal of beauty in our society since I consider it ridiculous, but I'm a size 20/22 and that's just what I'd like to stay; tired of weight gain; just want to be what I am and have a totally normal relationship with food without having to gain another 30lb to get that.

Laurie

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Sun, January 31, 2010 10:13:25 PMSubject: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Lori (and everyone),I am new here as well, and struggling with the same sort of dilemma... my fear of gaining weight from eating anything I want is keeping those feelings of guilt in me somwhere. I tell myself I can eat a handful of Ritz crackers, because I'm hungry and it's what I feel like eating, but afterward I binge on more, and then something else, and then more of something else. I know that that is evidence that I have not given myself complete permission to eat whatever I want to, but I'm not sure how to do that. Whenever I think I have, those feelings of anxiety and weight gain come back out of nowhere and create an urge to binge.Does anyone have any tips on how to overcome the fear of gaining weight? (I apologize if this topic has already been covered!)Thanks!Rach> > > Hi Everyone,> > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the > > earth!!! I was very busy with

paperwork and got 99% of it in; this > > upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then > > the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.> >> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> >> > As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my > > level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are > > messing with me sometimes!!> >> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and > > I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> >> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till > > about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, > > but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would need to > > get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol.

I have zero will to > > stop eating!!! But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used > > to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm > > not doing that. I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next > > day. So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, > > but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body > > that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.> >> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer > > that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but > > sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to > > be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain. I have certain > > foods that are still "special" and I have no will power to eat a > > "normal" amount. Lots of foods, that I used to

restrict, I can > > have and not overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian > > restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to > > stop eating right now. I think the goal is balance; I don't think I > > want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large > > variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm > > cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I > > avoid it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in > > a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb > > weight gain cause I don't stop at a> > normal amount.> >> > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is > > restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have > > the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary,

or whether to pick > > the salad because it's so good for me. If I could just have a > > normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then > > there are foods that are still "special" so how can I be the normal > > eater I want to be around those foods?> >> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> >> > Laurie> >>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Hope you've been well. I definitely see your point about the state of mind being most important. I think there are a few foods where I have to give myself total full permission to enjoy them; I've done it with other foods so successfully. But you know, I had chicken parm three nights in a row and you know how big the restaurant portions are, and I just couldn't stop eating it; I guess it's last supper eating because my state of mind is probably not at the "full permission" point yet with this food.

I don't know if you struggle with the full/satisfied feeling sometimes being so incredibly dim a signal; sometimes I just think, is it too much to ask that my signal be a little more obvious and easier to follow? I have the signal but it's still so subtle.

I don't intend to restrict any food so I'll definitely be having the chicken parm again, but I also noticed that certain foods really fill me and last longer and satisfy my body and other foods satisfy my taste buds but not my body; some foods taste great but leave me with no lasting full feeling. If I have a regular french toast, it tastes awesome but just doesn't fill me for long at all, but if i have a nice multigrain pancake, I'm full for quite a while and that feels so much better in the long run; the french toast satisfies only taste buds but the multigrain pancake satisfies stomach and taste buds.

So good to hear from you :.)

Laurie

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Mon, February 1, 2010 9:53:58 AMSubject: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Laurie, Welcome back! It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board. Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue. I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought, well, who knows she might be debating against me! :)Laurie,I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the glitter off of it--so it feels like "ordinary" food.If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then messes up my eating schedule/routine.If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n' m's. So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not

satisfied. This is because I haven't listened to what my body really wanted. It might have wanted a "butterfinger" or spaghetti (who knows).A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. (I think I stopped at 11 ) These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was acceptable.) I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there are three rows) and I still wanted more! What I did during that meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed and savored them. Once I had given myself full permission, I was able to hear my natural limitand actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the

table.Afterwards, I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them. I wanted a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went to two stores to find them. I purchased three packages.What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are still sitting untouched in our cupboard. I remember how delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up. When this happens, I will get to enjoy them again.My point here, is that abundance is more "a state of mind," which we can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up. >> Hi Everyone, > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the earth!!! I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me sometimes!!> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would

need to get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol. I have zero will to stop eating!!! But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm not doing that. I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next day. So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain. I have certain foods that are still "special" and I have no will power to eat a "normal" amount. Lots of foods, that I used to restrict, I can have and not overeat, but certain foods like a

great Italian restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now. I think the goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I don't stop at a> normal amount. > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's so good for me. If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then there are foods that are still "special" so how can I

be the normal eater I want to be around those foods?> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > Laurie>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Hope you've been well. I definitely see your point about the state of mind being most important. I think there are a few foods where I have to give myself total full permission to enjoy them; I've done it with other foods so successfully. But you know, I had chicken parm three nights in a row and you know how big the restaurant portions are, and I just couldn't stop eating it; I guess it's last supper eating because my state of mind is probably not at the "full permission" point yet with this food.

I don't know if you struggle with the full/satisfied feeling sometimes being so incredibly dim a signal; sometimes I just think, is it too much to ask that my signal be a little more obvious and easier to follow? I have the signal but it's still so subtle.

I don't intend to restrict any food so I'll definitely be having the chicken parm again, but I also noticed that certain foods really fill me and last longer and satisfy my body and other foods satisfy my taste buds but not my body; some foods taste great but leave me with no lasting full feeling. If I have a regular french toast, it tastes awesome but just doesn't fill me for long at all, but if i have a nice multigrain pancake, I'm full for quite a while and that feels so much better in the long run; the french toast satisfies only taste buds but the multigrain pancake satisfies stomach and taste buds.

So good to hear from you :.)

Laurie

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Mon, February 1, 2010 9:53:58 AMSubject: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Laurie, Welcome back! It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board. Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue. I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought, well, who knows she might be debating against me! :)Laurie,I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the glitter off of it--so it feels like "ordinary" food.If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then messes up my eating schedule/routine.If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n' m's. So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not

satisfied. This is because I haven't listened to what my body really wanted. It might have wanted a "butterfinger" or spaghetti (who knows).A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. (I think I stopped at 11 ) These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was acceptable.) I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there are three rows) and I still wanted more! What I did during that meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed and savored them. Once I had given myself full permission, I was able to hear my natural limitand actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the

table.Afterwards, I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them. I wanted a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went to two stores to find them. I purchased three packages.What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are still sitting untouched in our cupboard. I remember how delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up. When this happens, I will get to enjoy them again.My point here, is that abundance is more "a state of mind," which we can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up. >> Hi Everyone, > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the earth!!! I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me sometimes!!> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would

need to get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol. I have zero will to stop eating!!! But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm not doing that. I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next day. So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain. I have certain foods that are still "special" and I have no will power to eat a "normal" amount. Lots of foods, that I used to restrict, I can have and not overeat, but certain foods like a

great Italian restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now. I think the goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I don't stop at a> normal amount. > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's so good for me. If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then there are foods that are still "special" so how can I

be the normal eater I want to be around those foods?> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > Laurie>

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Hope you've been well. I definitely see your point about the state of mind being most important. I think there are a few foods where I have to give myself total full permission to enjoy them; I've done it with other foods so successfully. But you know, I had chicken parm three nights in a row and you know how big the restaurant portions are, and I just couldn't stop eating it; I guess it's last supper eating because my state of mind is probably not at the "full permission" point yet with this food.

I don't know if you struggle with the full/satisfied feeling sometimes being so incredibly dim a signal; sometimes I just think, is it too much to ask that my signal be a little more obvious and easier to follow? I have the signal but it's still so subtle.

I don't intend to restrict any food so I'll definitely be having the chicken parm again, but I also noticed that certain foods really fill me and last longer and satisfy my body and other foods satisfy my taste buds but not my body; some foods taste great but leave me with no lasting full feeling. If I have a regular french toast, it tastes awesome but just doesn't fill me for long at all, but if i have a nice multigrain pancake, I'm full for quite a while and that feels so much better in the long run; the french toast satisfies only taste buds but the multigrain pancake satisfies stomach and taste buds.

So good to hear from you :.)

Laurie

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Mon, February 1, 2010 9:53:58 AMSubject: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Laurie, Welcome back! It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board. Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue. I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought, well, who knows she might be debating against me! :)Laurie,I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the glitter off of it--so it feels like "ordinary" food.If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then messes up my eating schedule/routine.If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n' m's. So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not

satisfied. This is because I haven't listened to what my body really wanted. It might have wanted a "butterfinger" or spaghetti (who knows).A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. (I think I stopped at 11 ) These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was acceptable.) I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there are three rows) and I still wanted more! What I did during that meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed and savored them. Once I had given myself full permission, I was able to hear my natural limitand actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the

table.Afterwards, I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them. I wanted a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went to two stores to find them. I purchased three packages.What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are still sitting untouched in our cupboard. I remember how delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up. When this happens, I will get to enjoy them again.My point here, is that abundance is more "a state of mind," which we can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up. >> Hi Everyone, > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the earth!!! I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.> > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me sometimes!!> > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would

need to get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol. I have zero will to stop eating!!! But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm not doing that. I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next day. So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.> > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain. I have certain foods that are still "special" and I have no will power to eat a "normal" amount. Lots of foods, that I used to restrict, I can have and not overeat, but certain foods like a

great Italian restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now. I think the goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I don't stop at a> normal amount. > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's so good for me. If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then there are foods that are still "special" so how can I

be the normal eater I want to be around those foods?> > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > Laurie>

[Guest guest]

This suggestion might run afoul with the “no restriction†police

but I think it makes sense…

It seems to me that, for now, chicken parm is one of those foods

where portion size is defined as “however much someone puts in front of meâ€.  I

understand that – up until recently that has been my definition of portion size

for any food that I even remotely like.

What if you asked the restaurant to split the order and put the

other half in a takeout bag?  Or, ideally, if they’d give you a half order. 

That way you’re telling your mind/body that it’s eaten the chicken parm without

restriction but you’re just eating less so you can curb your fear of weight

gain while you’re engaging in this exercise?

Sooner or later your body will get the idea “I can eat chicken parm

whenever I wantâ€.

Just a thought.

From:

IntuitiveEating_Support

[mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of lori

Sent: Tuesday, February 02, 2010 11:34 AM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi ,

Hope you've been well. I definitely see your point

about the state of mind being most important. I think there are a few

foods where I have to give myself total full permission to enjoy them; I've

done it with other foods so successfully. But you know, I had chicken

parm three nights in a row and you know how big the restaurant portions are,

and I just couldn't stop eating it; I guess it's last supper eating because my

state of mind is probably not at the " full permission " point yet with

this food.

I don't know if you struggle with the full/satisfied feeling sometimes being so

incredibly dim a signal; sometimes I just think, is it too much to ask that my

signal be a little more obvious and easier to follow? I have the signal

but it's still so subtle.

I don't intend to restrict any food so I'll definitely be

having the chicken parm again, but I also noticed that certain foods really

fill me and last longer and satisfy my body and other foods satisfy my taste

buds but not my body; some foods taste great but leave me with no lasting full

feeling. If I have a regular french toast, it tastes awesome but just

doesn't fill me for long at all, but if i have a nice multigrain pancake, I'm

full for quite a while and that feels so much better in the long run; the

french toast satisfies only taste buds but the multigrain pancake satisfies

stomach and taste buds.

So good to hear from you :.)

Laurie

From: followyourbliss50

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Sent: Mon, February 1, 2010 9:53:58 AM

Subject: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Laurie,

Welcome back! It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was

thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board.

Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue.

I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought,

well, who knows she might be debating against me!

Laurie,

I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the

glitter off of it--so it feels like " ordinary " food.

If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I

deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then

messes up my eating schedule/routine.

If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I

can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n'

m's. So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not

satisfied. This is because I haven't listened to what my body really

wanted. It might have wanted a " butterfinger " or spaghetti

(who knows).

A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler

chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. (I think I stopped at 11 )

These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my

hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was

acceptable.) I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there

are three rows) and I still wanted more! What I did during that

meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I

took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed

and savored them. Once I had given myself full permission, I

was able to hear my natural limit

and actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the table.

Afterwards, I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my

house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them. I wanted

a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went

to two stores to find them. I purchased three packages.

What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are

still sitting untouched in our cupboard. I remember how

delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my

hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up. When

this happens, I will get to enjoy them again.

My point here, is that abundance is more " a state of mind, " which we

can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up.

>

> Hi Everyone,

> I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the

earth!!! I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this

upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress

will be just waiting to see how things go.

>

> I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!

>

> As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my level of

stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me

sometimes!!

>

> I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I

used to go five days in a row before I can stop.

>

> What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm

or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is

way, way bigger than any human being would need to get full; I think I'm having

a big feast, lol. I have zero will to stop eating!!! But then

after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the

night and into the next day, I'm not doing that. I'm not eating and just

waiting til hungry the next day. So big improvement from what I used to do

when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a

body that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.

>

> But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that

if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I

think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create

a bunch more weight gain. I have certain foods that are still

" special " and I have no will power to eat a " normal "

amount. Lots of foods, that I used to restrict, I can have and not

overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian restaurant version of chicken

parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now. I think the

goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want

to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken

parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid

it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row

til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I

don't stop at a

> normal amount.

>

> I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is

restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken

parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's

so good for me. If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods

that would be great, but then there are foods that are still

" special " so how can I be the normal eater I want to be around those

foods?

>

> I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!

>

> Laurie

>

[Guest guest]

This suggestion might run afoul with the “no restriction†police

but I think it makes sense…

It seems to me that, for now, chicken parm is one of those foods

where portion size is defined as “however much someone puts in front of meâ€.  I

understand that – up until recently that has been my definition of portion size

for any food that I even remotely like.

What if you asked the restaurant to split the order and put the

other half in a takeout bag?  Or, ideally, if they’d give you a half order. 

That way you’re telling your mind/body that it’s eaten the chicken parm without

restriction but you’re just eating less so you can curb your fear of weight

gain while you’re engaging in this exercise?

Sooner or later your body will get the idea “I can eat chicken parm

whenever I wantâ€.

Just a thought.

From:

IntuitiveEating_Support

[mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of lori

Sent: Tuesday, February 02, 2010 11:34 AM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi ,

Hope you've been well. I definitely see your point

about the state of mind being most important. I think there are a few

foods where I have to give myself total full permission to enjoy them; I've

done it with other foods so successfully. But you know, I had chicken

parm three nights in a row and you know how big the restaurant portions are,

and I just couldn't stop eating it; I guess it's last supper eating because my

state of mind is probably not at the " full permission " point yet with

this food.

I don't know if you struggle with the full/satisfied feeling sometimes being so

incredibly dim a signal; sometimes I just think, is it too much to ask that my

signal be a little more obvious and easier to follow? I have the signal

but it's still so subtle.

I don't intend to restrict any food so I'll definitely be

having the chicken parm again, but I also noticed that certain foods really

fill me and last longer and satisfy my body and other foods satisfy my taste

buds but not my body; some foods taste great but leave me with no lasting full

feeling. If I have a regular french toast, it tastes awesome but just

doesn't fill me for long at all, but if i have a nice multigrain pancake, I'm

full for quite a while and that feels so much better in the long run; the

french toast satisfies only taste buds but the multigrain pancake satisfies

stomach and taste buds.

So good to hear from you :.)

Laurie

From: followyourbliss50

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Sent: Mon, February 1, 2010 9:53:58 AM

Subject: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Laurie,

Welcome back! It's nice to hear your voice again. (I was

thinking of you when I was posting on the Food and Feelings Board.

Someone is having lap band surgery and that is a very provocative issue.

I thought, where is Laurie now as she's good at debate. But then I thought,

well, who knows she might be debating against me!

Laurie,

I don't think that we have to eat the food until we're sick of it --to take the

glitter off of it--so it feels like " ordinary " food.

If I do this (and I'm sure I have)--then all I'm doing is depriving myself. (I

deprive myself when I put food in my body that my body doesn't want; it then

messes up my eating schedule/routine.

If I am so busy doing these academic exercises about proving to myself that I

can eat, for example, m n m's, then I will have made my body full from m n'

m's. So a few hours later--I have what Roth calls empty fullness. I'm not

satisfied. This is because I haven't listened to what my body really

wanted. It might have wanted a " butterfinger " or spaghetti

(who knows).

A few weeks ago I posted on the Long Haul site about eating 11 keebler

chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. (I think I stopped at 11 )

These were new cookies for me and I was finding them very delicious and my

hunger was also big (or felt bigger than my mind/judgment part thought was

acceptable.) I had eaten a whole row of the cookies (there

are three rows) and I still wanted more! What I did during that

meal is I opened up permission. I let myself go (heaven forbid!) to the second row--I

took several more and I sat down at the table with no distractions and enjoyed

and savored them. Once I had given myself full permission, I

was able to hear my natural limit

and actually didn't eat all of the cookies I had brought to the table.

Afterwards, I decided that I needed to have those cookies in my

house--because I didn't want a sense of deprivation about them. I wanted

a sense of abundance. (I also have kids who might eat them up) I actually went

to two stores to find them. I purchased three packages.

What's interesting (and kind of sad in some ways ) is that those cookies are

still sitting untouched in our cupboard. I remember how

delicious they were and how I enjoyed them, but I am waiting for my

hunger/natural cravings (for this specific type food) to come up. When

this happens, I will get to enjoy them again.

My point here, is that abundance is more " a state of mind, " which we

can create by self caring words and sometime stocking up.

>

> Hi Everyone,

> I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the

earth!!! I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this

upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then the stress

will be just waiting to see how things go.

>

> I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!

>

> As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my level of

stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are messing with me

sometimes!!

>

> I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and I

used to go five days in a row before I can stop.

>

> What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till about 6pm

or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, but that meal is

way, way bigger than any human being would need to get full; I think I'm having

a big feast, lol. I have zero will to stop eating!!! But then

after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used to continue to binge through the

night and into the next day, I'm not doing that. I'm not eating and just

waiting til hungry the next day. So big improvement from what I used to do

when very stressed, but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a

body that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.

>

> But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer that

if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but sometimes I

think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to be ordinary would create

a bunch more weight gain. I have certain foods that are still

" special " and I have no will power to eat a " normal "

amount. Lots of foods, that I used to restrict, I can have and not

overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian restaurant version of chicken

parm......well, that is too hard to stop eating right now. I think the

goal is balance; I don't think I want to be a health extremist, but I sure want

to eat a large variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken

parm cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I avoid

it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in a row

til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb weight gain cause I

don't stop at a

> normal amount.

>

> I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is

restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have the chicken

parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick the salad because it's

so good for me. If I could just have a normal balance of variety of foods

that would be great, but then there are foods that are still

" special " so how can I be the normal eater I want to be around those

foods?

>

> I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!

>

> Laurie

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Everyone...

I am only a week into the "no food plan" stage, and I am very anxious and glad to be here. I am definitely overeating, but gratefully on yogurt, fruit, and other more healthy foods. I have though had small amts of chocolate, pieces of a muffin, etc.

Since I also don't want to gain weight, I tend to "behave this way". But having no food plan IS BIG STUFF... Got one book yesterday... Glad to be here, and that you are all here...

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jkarlen@...Date: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 14:13:10 -0600Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

I believe what you’re talking about is the gentle nutrition phase where you’re balancing the equation in that fashion.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of Diane MelansonSent: Wednesday, February 03, 2010 1:32 PMTo: intuitiveeating_support Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Everyone... Excuse me for saying what is in my heart, but doesn't the logical fact come into all this, that if I continue to eat fried, fattening unhealthy food in excess quantities, my body will justifiably react by adding unwanted FAT TO MY BUTT ? Am I not supposed to factor in the human truth of my actions with FOODS ? Sort of confused, and baffled...Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jkarlenkarlenDate: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 08:40:40 -0600Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

I have to jump in on this conversation because I’m starting to find myself in a mental crisis with this.

How do I know my inner compulsive overeater isn’t just living large on this idea that it can eat whatever it wants when it wants it? Last night I had brownies at two different meals and French fries at one. I didn’t feel “guilty” about it but at the same time part of me is aware that long term eating like this has to have the same consequences as all the other brownies and French fries I’ve eaten in my life.

Doesn’t there reach a point where I have to “force” myself to head towards gentle nutrition? I’m mentally good with the idea that I can eat whatever I want when I want to…or at least I think I am. Maybe I’m not until I stop having the internal debate I’m voicing here?

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of loriSent: Wednesday, February 03, 2010 8:29 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Jen,

I completely understand where you're coming from of course because I've been feeling the same way.

In so many ways intuitive eating really does make sense and even legalizing restricted foods makes sense, and I've already done so much of legalizing! I don't regret that I can have cake and cookies and chocolate and stuff like that in the house and not gobble them up, but I did put on a lot of weight when I stopped dieting; I don't think it was from legalizing as much as it was from gaining weight after 18 yrs of dieting because I finally stopped starving myself. But I do gain some weight from legalizing foods also because I do eat more than I need for a while before I get to the point where I can have the food around and not be overly tempted to eat past a point of comfortably full.

It seems to me that, in theory, continuing to legalize the foods that I still haven't makes sense, but practically speaking I'm not going to have that food every day til I can have it around because I'm not willing to gain any more weight. I know this disagrees with the principles but I can't help feeling this way.

I'm not restricting anything, but I'm not in the mood to eat one thing for ten days in a row either; I'm at the point where I just want to be normal, lol, and I want to have an eating style that's balanced while not restricting anything. But I can't stand the thought of not having a normal, healthy, balanced eating style anymore. Chicken parm ten days in a row is not my idea of balanced, but not restricting it and having it if I really want it is also very important. right now I think I'll plan to have it once a week and then if I really, really want it I will have it more than that but I'm not bringing in 20 chicken parm dinners and eating them all week long!

Laurie

From: jentodd510 <jentodd510>To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, February 2, 2010 1:01:41 PMSubject: Re: Been so busy!!!

hi Laurie,i can sort of relate to what you're saying, i think, tho my circumstances are different.i've gained 20 lbs in this past year in part from becoming way more sedentary due to agoraphobia and other anxiety, perhaps due to some of the medications i'm on and from partially easing up on restricting my eating.i feel like i haven't even really begun the IE process and i've already gained weight. i feel like my body really has the starvation mode in high gear! i'm a size 18/20 and have partially accepted the way my body is now. i feel very sad and sometimes panicky thinking about becoming larger, espcially since i am not eating all that differently.anyway...mainly just wanted to say what you wrote resonated with me...good luck with your journey,jen todd> > > > > Hi Everyone,> > > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the > > > earth!!! I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this > > > upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then > > > the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.> > >> > > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > >> > > As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my > > > level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are > > > messing with me sometimes!!> > >> > > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and > > > I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > >> > > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till > > > about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, > > > but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would need to > > > get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol. I have zero will to > > > stop eating!!! But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used > > > to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm > > > not doing that. I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next > > > day. So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, > > > but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body > > > that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.> > >> > > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer > > > that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but > > > sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to > > > be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain. I have certain > > > foods that are still "special" and I have no will power to eat a > > > "normal" amount. Lots of foods, that I used to restrict, I can > > > have and not overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian > > > restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to > > > stop eating right now. I think the goal is balance; I don't think I > > > want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large > > > variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm > > > cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I > > > avoid it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in > > > a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb > > > weight gain cause I don't stop at a> > > normal amount.> > >> > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is > > > restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have > > > the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick > > > the salad because it's so good for me. If I could just have a > > > normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then > > > there are foods that are still "special" so how can I be the normal > > > eater I want to be around those foods?> > >> > > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > >> > > Laurie> > >> >>

[Guest guest]

Hi Everyone...

I am only a week into the "no food plan" stage, and I am very anxious and glad to be here. I am definitely overeating, but gratefully on yogurt, fruit, and other more healthy foods. I have though had small amts of chocolate, pieces of a muffin, etc.

Since I also don't want to gain weight, I tend to "behave this way". But having no food plan IS BIG STUFF... Got one book yesterday... Glad to be here, and that you are all here...

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jkarlen@...Date: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 14:13:10 -0600Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

I believe what you’re talking about is the gentle nutrition phase where you’re balancing the equation in that fashion.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of Diane MelansonSent: Wednesday, February 03, 2010 1:32 PMTo: intuitiveeating_support Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Everyone... Excuse me for saying what is in my heart, but doesn't the logical fact come into all this, that if I continue to eat fried, fattening unhealthy food in excess quantities, my body will justifiably react by adding unwanted FAT TO MY BUTT ? Am I not supposed to factor in the human truth of my actions with FOODS ? Sort of confused, and baffled...Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jkarlenkarlenDate: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 08:40:40 -0600Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

I have to jump in on this conversation because I’m starting to find myself in a mental crisis with this.

How do I know my inner compulsive overeater isn’t just living large on this idea that it can eat whatever it wants when it wants it? Last night I had brownies at two different meals and French fries at one. I didn’t feel “guilty” about it but at the same time part of me is aware that long term eating like this has to have the same consequences as all the other brownies and French fries I’ve eaten in my life.

Doesn’t there reach a point where I have to “force” myself to head towards gentle nutrition? I’m mentally good with the idea that I can eat whatever I want when I want to…or at least I think I am. Maybe I’m not until I stop having the internal debate I’m voicing here?

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of loriSent: Wednesday, February 03, 2010 8:29 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: Been so busy!!!

Hi Jen,

I completely understand where you're coming from of course because I've been feeling the same way.

In so many ways intuitive eating really does make sense and even legalizing restricted foods makes sense, and I've already done so much of legalizing! I don't regret that I can have cake and cookies and chocolate and stuff like that in the house and not gobble them up, but I did put on a lot of weight when I stopped dieting; I don't think it was from legalizing as much as it was from gaining weight after 18 yrs of dieting because I finally stopped starving myself. But I do gain some weight from legalizing foods also because I do eat more than I need for a while before I get to the point where I can have the food around and not be overly tempted to eat past a point of comfortably full.

It seems to me that, in theory, continuing to legalize the foods that I still haven't makes sense, but practically speaking I'm not going to have that food every day til I can have it around because I'm not willing to gain any more weight. I know this disagrees with the principles but I can't help feeling this way.

I'm not restricting anything, but I'm not in the mood to eat one thing for ten days in a row either; I'm at the point where I just want to be normal, lol, and I want to have an eating style that's balanced while not restricting anything. But I can't stand the thought of not having a normal, healthy, balanced eating style anymore. Chicken parm ten days in a row is not my idea of balanced, but not restricting it and having it if I really want it is also very important. right now I think I'll plan to have it once a week and then if I really, really want it I will have it more than that but I'm not bringing in 20 chicken parm dinners and eating them all week long!

Laurie

From: jentodd510 <jentodd510>To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, February 2, 2010 1:01:41 PMSubject: Re: Been so busy!!!

hi Laurie,i can sort of relate to what you're saying, i think, tho my circumstances are different.i've gained 20 lbs in this past year in part from becoming way more sedentary due to agoraphobia and other anxiety, perhaps due to some of the medications i'm on and from partially easing up on restricting my eating.i feel like i haven't even really begun the IE process and i've already gained weight. i feel like my body really has the starvation mode in high gear! i'm a size 18/20 and have partially accepted the way my body is now. i feel very sad and sometimes panicky thinking about becoming larger, espcially since i am not eating all that differently.anyway...mainly just wanted to say what you wrote resonated with me...good luck with your journey,jen todd> > > > > Hi Everyone,> > > I don't want you all to think I've fallen off the face of the > > > earth!!! I was very busy with paperwork and got 99% of it in; this > > > upcoming week I aught to have all the rest taken care of and then > > > the stress will be just waiting to see how things go.> > >> > > I am sorry, I haven't even had time to read any of your emails!!> > >> > > As far as food goes..wow..it' s much more of a challenge when my > > > level of stress is extremely high...and I also think my harmones are > > > messing with me sometimes!!> > >> > > I have to say that I haven't had any lengthy periods of binging, and > > > I used to go five days in a row before I can stop.> > >> > > What I'm doing now instead is an improvement; I'll be fine till > > > about 6pm or so, and even then I will have waited til hungry to eat, > > > but that meal is way, way bigger than any human being would need to > > > get full; I think I'm having a big feast, lol. I have zero will to > > > stop eating!!! But then after, when I'm over-full, whereas I used > > > to continue to binge through the night and into the next day, I'm > > > not doing that. I'm not eating and just waiting til hungry the next > > > day. So big improvement from what I used to do when very stressed, > > > but still eating enough to create a bit of weight gain on a body > > > that's already big. I'm not beating myself up.> > >> > > But I am confused about the eat what you want; I am a true believer > > > that if we eat what we want enough it will lose its specialness, but > > > sometimes I think the amount I'd have to eat to get those foods to > > > be ordinary would create a bunch more weight gain. I have certain > > > foods that are still "special" and I have no will power to eat a > > > "normal" amount. Lots of foods, that I used to restrict, I can > > > have and not overeat, but certain foods like a great Italian > > > restaurant version of chicken parm......well, that is too hard to > > > stop eating right now. I think the goal is balance; I don't think I > > > want to be a health extremist, but I sure want to eat a large > > > variety of healthy foods but I sure can't restrict the chicken parm > > > cause you can bet that will lead to an all out binge of it unless I > > > avoid it forever. But I don't really want to have it ten times in > > > a row til it seems ordinary because that will be another 20 Lb > > > weight gain cause I don't stop at a> > > normal amount.> > >> > > I know my goal is a healthy, balanced way of eating where no food is > > > restricted but sometimes I don't know in the moment whether to have > > > the chicken parm AGAIN to make it more ordinary, or whether to pick > > > the salad because it's so good for me. If I could just have a > > > normal balance of variety of foods that would be great, but then > > > there are foods that are still "special" so how can I be the normal > > > eater I want to be around those foods?> > >> > > I still don't feel like I have all the answers!!!> > >> > > Laurie> > >> >>

[Guest guest]

Diane,

Congratulations on your week on a no diet plan! (No eating plan sounds like a plan to not eat to me!)

It's very normal to overeat when your body is accustomed to restriction. Keep in mind that many of us also end up overeating when we are still restricting certain food groups. Do you feel like you could be overeating " safe " foods to avoid others?

Just a thought... may not apply to you.

Anyway, congratulations again on your awesome progress! And feel free to share the struggles and anxiety as well.

Best,

Abby

 

Hi Everyone...

 

I am only a week into the " no food plan " stage, and I am very anxious and glad to be here.  I am definitely overeating, but gratefully on yogurt, fruit, and other more healthy foods.  I have though had small amts of chocolate, pieces of a muffin, etc. 

 

Since I also don't want to gain weight, I tend to " behave this way " .  But having no food plan IS BIG STUFF...   Got one book yesterday...   Glad to be here, and that you are all here...

 Diane   ________________________________To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: j...Date: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 14:13:10 -0600

Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!! I believe what you’re talking about ...

[Guest guest]

Diane,

Congratulations on your week on a no diet plan! (No eating plan sounds like a plan to not eat to me!)

It's very normal to overeat when your body is accustomed to restriction. Keep in mind that many of us also end up overeating when we are still restricting certain food groups. Do you feel like you could be overeating " safe " foods to avoid others?

Just a thought... may not apply to you.

Anyway, congratulations again on your awesome progress! And feel free to share the struggles and anxiety as well.

Best,

Abby

 

Hi Everyone...

 

I am only a week into the " no food plan " stage, and I am very anxious and glad to be here.  I am definitely overeating, but gratefully on yogurt, fruit, and other more healthy foods.  I have though had small amts of chocolate, pieces of a muffin, etc. 

 

Since I also don't want to gain weight, I tend to " behave this way " .  But having no food plan IS BIG STUFF...   Got one book yesterday...   Glad to be here, and that you are all here...

 Diane   ________________________________To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: j...Date: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 14:13:10 -0600

Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!! I believe what you’re talking about ...

[Guest guest]

Diane,

Congratulations on your week on a no diet plan! (No eating plan sounds like a plan to not eat to me!)

It's very normal to overeat when your body is accustomed to restriction. Keep in mind that many of us also end up overeating when we are still restricting certain food groups. Do you feel like you could be overeating " safe " foods to avoid others?

Just a thought... may not apply to you.

Anyway, congratulations again on your awesome progress! And feel free to share the struggles and anxiety as well.

Best,

Abby

 

Hi Everyone...

 

I am only a week into the " no food plan " stage, and I am very anxious and glad to be here.  I am definitely overeating, but gratefully on yogurt, fruit, and other more healthy foods.  I have though had small amts of chocolate, pieces of a muffin, etc. 

 

Since I also don't want to gain weight, I tend to " behave this way " .  But having no food plan IS BIG STUFF...   Got one book yesterday...   Glad to be here, and that you are all here...

 Diane   ________________________________To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: j...Date: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 14:13:10 -0600

Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!! I believe what you’re talking about ...

[Guest guest]

Dear Abby...

Thank you Abby for your encouragement. The week was not smooth in all counts, but I certainly have no doubt of the long term value that is for sure. I went to a friends' to watch the SB last night, and let myself have corn chips, healthy crackers, and even a taste of cake being served. I ate too many corn chips, but also felt relief I didn't have to have my "weighed and measured" breakfast, and can feel the freedom to allow my stomach to tell me when and what to eat next.

Since God is the Lord of my life, I am feeling very grateful and very blessed this morning... YAHOO, I feel hope I can be healed of this terrible problem / relationship with food.

Thanks again,

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: abigail.wolfson@...Date: Sun, 7 Feb 2010 00:18:55 -0500Subject: Re: RE: Re: Been so busy!!!

Diane,

Congratulations on your week on a no diet plan! (No eating plan sounds like a plan to not eat to me!)

It's very normal to overeat when your body is accustomed to restriction. Keep in mind that many of us also end up overeating when we are still restricting certain food groups. Do you feel like you could be overeating "safe" foods to avoid others?

Just a thought... may not apply to you.

Anyway, congratulations again on your awesome progress! And feel free to share the struggles and anxiety as well.

Best,

Abby

On Feb 4, 2010 10:59 AM, "Diane Melanson" <DMMelansonmsn> wrote:

Hi Everyone... I am only a week into the "no food plan" stage, and I am very anxious and glad to be here. I am definitely overeating, but gratefully on yogurt, fruit, and other more healthy foods. I have though had small amts of chocolate, pieces of a muffin, etc. Since I also don't want to gain weight, I tend to "behave this way". But having no food plan IS BIG STUFF... Got one book yesterday... Glad to be here, and that you are all here...

Diane ________________________________To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: j...Date: Wed, 3 Feb 2010 14:13:10 -0600

Subject: RE: Re: Been so busy!!! I believe what you’re talking about ...