Re: Hearing but not listening

April 4, 2010

Hi Eileen

This is what I do! Sometimes I get this urge to buy something I am craving, say

some chocolate, then find it in my bag several days later. It is as if buying it

was enough. Just reading what you said here, it clicked what was going on - I

just need to know it is there, that it is available. I think that is important.

But I can understand the compulsion to eat it and not enjoy it as I've done that

too.

I wonder if just asking yourself, " do I want this now or later? " might help.

It's really worked for me. The guilt is a hurdle - for me it was when I decided

to buy 2 gourmet cookies when I told myself one is plenty, but in the end I only

ate one, and then very slowly, savoring it over an hour, which surprised me no

end. It was enough. And I had the other to save for " later " .

When I was a child " later " was something that never came. All those empty

promises must have left their mark on me. Giving myself " later " back actually

feels joyful.

Perhaps it is a matter of reinstating some integrity in my life that was lacking

when I was young.

Thanks for eating the bakery goods - it has really given me a lot of insight

(bet you didn't know THAT would happen at the time ... LOL you now need to

reframe it as an act of kindness)

Fiona

>

> So yesterday I tried to listen to my intuition. It was very strong that my

body didn't want the baked good I bought but I bought it anyway. Then when I

got home and stood in front of it I got very clearly again I didn't want to eat

this. I did anyway - the whole thing. It wasn't that good and I just felt sick

afterwards. I did manage to not beat myself up but whew!! What a day.

>

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