Re: Sharing some thoughts . . . piggy backing off that

[Guest guest]

Leaving food on your plate! That, for me, has so far been my biggest break through. I was the type who finished every bite, even at a restaurant, and to my surprise, I find myself leaving food there all the time now. There is still so much I'm struggling with, (okay, I found IE maybe 4 months ago, so I probably should be.) I am often choosing to eat rather than deal with the cause of my desire to eat, but at least I am aware of it now. It's also helping me to eat less when I do. The extra frosting from my daughters birthday cake. Sadly, I'm eating some of it, but it's little bits, and I've realized I eat it for the comfort the fats offer my brain, but also because it's my aunts recipe and feels like home and family gatherings. I've discovered

that I am eating because the things in my life that cause me stress, are things I don't feel I have control over. I want to be closer to family, I want my husband to travel less and be home more, have more time for family. Those are all things I can't change. I can change my feelings of boredom, I can spend less time on the internet and more doing actual physical 'things.' With luck, I can even change how my 4 yr old and I interact and not wish to eat as often after a battle of wills with her. I will win in the end. Okay, this stuff has just been swimming in my brain, and then the phrase that brings it out hit.DawnTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wed, June 9, 2010 7:54:42 AMSubject: Re: Re: Sharing some thoughts . . .

I should probably clarify that what I meant by "bigger servings" was

servings big enough that you really can't eat it all. When I was

trying to figure out "how much is enough" and to really feel my

full/too full point (having been bulimic, those lines were pretty

blurry), sometimes it helped to have "just too much" and then I'd get

to the point where I'd feel like, "Ugh, I really don't want any more"

and I'd leave the rest. You do have to be paying attention, but it

gives you the chance to see that you really can leave food on your

plate.

Sohni

Thanks so much, Sohni. This makes so much sense, and makes it

seem so easy and natural. I'm so used to "punishing" myself by eating

less that I couldn't easily see that serving myself less could actually

be a positive thing, but your way of explaining it is something I'm

going to save to a file so I don't forget!

All best,

Laurie

Sohni wrote:

>>>I usually give myself a fairly small serving and tell

myself I can have more if I want it. This serves three purposes: one,

I don't have to fight the "don't clean your plate if you're full"

battle at every single meal (and I grew up in a family where I *had* to

eat everything, so that urge is strong); two, I have to think at least

a little mindfully about getting up and getting that second serving;

and three, it proves to me that, yes, I can have more! Sometimes it

helps to just change around the way you'd normally do things--smaller

servings, even bigger servings, etc.<<<

[Guest guest]

Leaving food, along with not just eating something because it's in

front of me, is a big deal for me.  When I started IE, I realized that

not only had the "you must eat everything on your plate" credo from my

childhood caused problems, but because I had no choice over what to eat

when I was a child, I often didn't really know whether I liked

something or not.  It was so ingrained in me to just eat what was given

that I had to retrain myself to pay attention and really think about

whether what I was putting in my mouth was something I wanted to eat. 

Foods I hate or love weren't a problem so much as things that were more

"meh" foods--I might like them OK if I was really hungry and they were

quick, or maybe I didn't care much for them at all.  It's taken some

work to convince myself that I can take a bite of something and decide

I don't want it even if I have a plate full of it, or to make a meal

for my family and not like the smell of it and eat something else. 

Most of the time now I make one thing for my family and something else

very simple for myself because I don't want what they're having.

Sohni

 

Leaving

food on your plate!  That, for me, has so far been my biggest break

through.  I was the type who finished every bite, even at a restaurant,

and to my surprise, I find myself leaving food there all the time now. 

There is still so much I'm struggling with, (okay, I found IE maybe 4

months ago, so I probably should be.)  I am often choosing to eat

rather than deal with the cause of my desire to eat, but at least I am

aware of it now.  It's also helping me to eat less when I do.  The

extra frosting from my daughters birthday cake.  Sadly, I'm eating some

of it, but it's little bits, and I've realized I eat it for the comfort

the fats offer my brain, but also because it's my aunts recipe and

feels like home and family gatherings.  I've discovered that I am

eating because the things in my life that cause me stress, are things I

don't feel I have control over.  I want to be closer to family, I want

my husband to travel less and be home more, have more time for family. 

Those are all things I can't change.  I can change my feelings of

boredom, I can spend less time on the internet and more doing actual

physical 'things.'  With luck, I can even change how my 4 yr old and I

interact and not wish to eat as often after a battle of wills with

her.  I will win in the end. 

Okay, this stuff has just been swimming in my brain, and then the

phrase that brings it out hit.

Dawn

From:

jeanniet58 <jeanniet58gmail>

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Sent: Wed, June 9,

2010 7:54:42 AM

Subject: Re:

Re: Sharing some thoughts . . .

 

I should probably clarify that what I meant by "bigger servings" 

was

servings big enough that you really can't eat it all.  When I was

trying to figure out "how much is enough" and to really feel my

full/too full point (having been bulimic, those lines were pretty

blurry), sometimes it helped to have "just too much" and then I'd get

to the point where I'd feel like, "Ugh, I really don't want any more"

and I'd leave the rest.  You do have to be paying attention, but it

gives you the chance to see that you really can leave food on your

plate.

Sohni

On 6/8/2010 9:24 PM, bcpeditoraol (DOT) com

wrote:

 

Thanks so much, Sohni. This makes so much sense, and makes it

seem so easy and natural. I'm so used to "punishing" myself by eating

less that I couldn't easily see that serving myself less could actually

be a positive thing, but your way of explaining it is something I'm

going to save to a file so I don't forget!

 

All best,

Laurie

 

Sohni wrote:

>>>I usually give myself a fairly small serving and tell

myself I can have more if I want it.  This serves three purposes:  one,

I don't have to fight the "don't clean your plate if you're full"

battle at every single meal (and I grew up in a family where I *had* to

eat everything, so that urge is strong); two, I have to think at least

a little mindfully about getting up and getting that second serving;

and three, it proves to me that, yes, I can have more!  Sometimes it

helps to just change around the way you'd normally do things--smaller

servings, even bigger servings, etc.<<<

[Guest guest]

Leaving food, along with not just eating something because it's in

front of me, is a big deal for me.  When I started IE, I realized that

not only had the "you must eat everything on your plate" credo from my

childhood caused problems, but because I had no choice over what to eat

when I was a child, I often didn't really know whether I liked

something or not.  It was so ingrained in me to just eat what was given

that I had to retrain myself to pay attention and really think about

whether what I was putting in my mouth was something I wanted to eat. 

Foods I hate or love weren't a problem so much as things that were more

"meh" foods--I might like them OK if I was really hungry and they were

quick, or maybe I didn't care much for them at all.  It's taken some

work to convince myself that I can take a bite of something and decide

I don't want it even if I have a plate full of it, or to make a meal

for my family and not like the smell of it and eat something else. 

Most of the time now I make one thing for my family and something else

very simple for myself because I don't want what they're having.

Sohni

 

Leaving

food on your plate!  That, for me, has so far been my biggest break

through.  I was the type who finished every bite, even at a restaurant,

and to my surprise, I find myself leaving food there all the time now. 

There is still so much I'm struggling with, (okay, I found IE maybe 4

months ago, so I probably should be.)  I am often choosing to eat

rather than deal with the cause of my desire to eat, but at least I am

aware of it now.  It's also helping me to eat less when I do.  The

extra frosting from my daughters birthday cake.  Sadly, I'm eating some

of it, but it's little bits, and I've realized I eat it for the comfort

the fats offer my brain, but also because it's my aunts recipe and

feels like home and family gatherings.  I've discovered that I am

eating because the things in my life that cause me stress, are things I

don't feel I have control over.  I want to be closer to family, I want

my husband to travel less and be home more, have more time for family. 

Those are all things I can't change.  I can change my feelings of

boredom, I can spend less time on the internet and more doing actual

physical 'things.'  With luck, I can even change how my 4 yr old and I

interact and not wish to eat as often after a battle of wills with

her.  I will win in the end. 

Okay, this stuff has just been swimming in my brain, and then the

phrase that brings it out hit.

Dawn

From:

jeanniet58 <jeanniet58gmail>

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Sent: Wed, June 9,

2010 7:54:42 AM

Subject: Re:

Re: Sharing some thoughts . . .

 

I should probably clarify that what I meant by "bigger servings" 

was

servings big enough that you really can't eat it all.  When I was

trying to figure out "how much is enough" and to really feel my

full/too full point (having been bulimic, those lines were pretty

blurry), sometimes it helped to have "just too much" and then I'd get

to the point where I'd feel like, "Ugh, I really don't want any more"

and I'd leave the rest.  You do have to be paying attention, but it

gives you the chance to see that you really can leave food on your

plate.

Sohni

On 6/8/2010 9:24 PM, bcpeditoraol (DOT) com

wrote:

 

Thanks so much, Sohni. This makes so much sense, and makes it

seem so easy and natural. I'm so used to "punishing" myself by eating

less that I couldn't easily see that serving myself less could actually

be a positive thing, but your way of explaining it is something I'm

going to save to a file so I don't forget!

 

All best,

Laurie

 

Sohni wrote:

>>>I usually give myself a fairly small serving and tell

myself I can have more if I want it.  This serves three purposes:  one,

I don't have to fight the "don't clean your plate if you're full"

battle at every single meal (and I grew up in a family where I *had* to

eat everything, so that urge is strong); two, I have to think at least

a little mindfully about getting up and getting that second serving;

and three, it proves to me that, yes, I can have more!  Sometimes it

helps to just change around the way you'd normally do things--smaller

servings, even bigger servings, etc.<<<

[Guest guest]

Leaving food, along with not just eating something because it's in

front of me, is a big deal for me.  When I started IE, I realized that

not only had the "you must eat everything on your plate" credo from my

childhood caused problems, but because I had no choice over what to eat

when I was a child, I often didn't really know whether I liked

something or not.  It was so ingrained in me to just eat what was given

that I had to retrain myself to pay attention and really think about

whether what I was putting in my mouth was something I wanted to eat. 

Foods I hate or love weren't a problem so much as things that were more

"meh" foods--I might like them OK if I was really hungry and they were

quick, or maybe I didn't care much for them at all.  It's taken some

work to convince myself that I can take a bite of something and decide

I don't want it even if I have a plate full of it, or to make a meal

for my family and not like the smell of it and eat something else. 

Most of the time now I make one thing for my family and something else

very simple for myself because I don't want what they're having.

Sohni

 

Leaving

food on your plate!  That, for me, has so far been my biggest break

through.  I was the type who finished every bite, even at a restaurant,

and to my surprise, I find myself leaving food there all the time now. 

There is still so much I'm struggling with, (okay, I found IE maybe 4

months ago, so I probably should be.)  I am often choosing to eat

rather than deal with the cause of my desire to eat, but at least I am

aware of it now.  It's also helping me to eat less when I do.  The

extra frosting from my daughters birthday cake.  Sadly, I'm eating some

of it, but it's little bits, and I've realized I eat it for the comfort

the fats offer my brain, but also because it's my aunts recipe and

feels like home and family gatherings.  I've discovered that I am

eating because the things in my life that cause me stress, are things I

don't feel I have control over.  I want to be closer to family, I want

my husband to travel less and be home more, have more time for family. 

Those are all things I can't change.  I can change my feelings of

boredom, I can spend less time on the internet and more doing actual

physical 'things.'  With luck, I can even change how my 4 yr old and I

interact and not wish to eat as often after a battle of wills with

her.  I will win in the end. 

Okay, this stuff has just been swimming in my brain, and then the

phrase that brings it out hit.

Dawn

From:

jeanniet58 <jeanniet58gmail>

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Sent: Wed, June 9,

2010 7:54:42 AM

Subject: Re:

Re: Sharing some thoughts . . .

 

I should probably clarify that what I meant by "bigger servings" 

was

servings big enough that you really can't eat it all.  When I was

trying to figure out "how much is enough" and to really feel my

full/too full point (having been bulimic, those lines were pretty

blurry), sometimes it helped to have "just too much" and then I'd get

to the point where I'd feel like, "Ugh, I really don't want any more"

and I'd leave the rest.  You do have to be paying attention, but it

gives you the chance to see that you really can leave food on your

plate.

Sohni

On 6/8/2010 9:24 PM, bcpeditoraol (DOT) com

wrote:

 

Thanks so much, Sohni. This makes so much sense, and makes it

seem so easy and natural. I'm so used to "punishing" myself by eating

less that I couldn't easily see that serving myself less could actually

be a positive thing, but your way of explaining it is something I'm

going to save to a file so I don't forget!

 

All best,

Laurie

 

Sohni wrote:

>>>I usually give myself a fairly small serving and tell

myself I can have more if I want it.  This serves three purposes:  one,

I don't have to fight the "don't clean your plate if you're full"

battle at every single meal (and I grew up in a family where I *had* to

eat everything, so that urge is strong); two, I have to think at least

a little mindfully about getting up and getting that second serving;

and three, it proves to me that, yes, I can have more!  Sometimes it

helps to just change around the way you'd normally do things--smaller

servings, even bigger servings, etc.<<<