Re: So confused about my binge last night...

[Guest guest]

Jen-I don't have any insight for you, but I wanted to say hey, and I will be reading for others responses. This is what my husband talks about, not being able to stop when it comes to sugar. He says he feels like he has a sugar addiction and for that reason doesn't think IE could ever work for him. I guess I can say you're not alone, even if I don't have answers.Dawn RFrom: jenbrube

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:05:35 AMSubject: So confused about my binge last night...

Hi everyone,

Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could have been that I felt like this was "my last chance" to eat them so I consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat anything that's sweet.

And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

Jen

[Guest guest]

Jen-I don't have any insight for you, but I wanted to say hey, and I will be reading for others responses. This is what my husband talks about, not being able to stop when it comes to sugar. He says he feels like he has a sugar addiction and for that reason doesn't think IE could ever work for him. I guess I can say you're not alone, even if I don't have answers.Dawn RFrom: jenbrube

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Mon, July 26, 2010 11:05:35 AMSubject: So confused about my binge last night...

Hi everyone,

Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could have been that I felt like this was "my last chance" to eat them so I consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat anything that's sweet.

And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

Jen

[Guest guest]

Dawn,

Yes, this is important for me to ponder. I too seem " powerless " over

full-fat dairy. Was vegan all day yesterday, then landed at a

restaurant where a woman in the next table was eating cheesy goopy

mac n cheese, and I ordered it too, ate the WHOLE thing, and even got

a sundae for dessert. Was crazy!!!

Ciao!

>

> Jen-

>

> I don't have any insight for you, but I wanted to say hey, and I

> will be reading for others responses. This is what my husband

> talks about, not being able to stop when it comes to sugar. He

> says he feels like he has a sugar addiction and for that reason

> doesn't think IE could ever work for him. I guess I can say you're

> not alone, even if I don't have answers.

>

> Dawn R

[Guest guest]

Dawn,

Yes, this is important for me to ponder. I too seem " powerless " over

full-fat dairy. Was vegan all day yesterday, then landed at a

restaurant where a woman in the next table was eating cheesy goopy

mac n cheese, and I ordered it too, ate the WHOLE thing, and even got

a sundae for dessert. Was crazy!!!

Ciao!

>

> Jen-

>

> I don't have any insight for you, but I wanted to say hey, and I

> will be reading for others responses. This is what my husband

> talks about, not being able to stop when it comes to sugar. He

> says he feels like he has a sugar addiction and for that reason

> doesn't think IE could ever work for him. I guess I can say you're

> not alone, even if I don't have answers.

>

> Dawn R

[Guest guest]

Hi, Jen,

First of all, if you can, just let this incident go. It happened last night, and today is a new day. No need to add guilt on top of it all! This is not a "perfect 100% of the time" process--it's something you'll grow more and more into as you go along.

In Geneen's earlier book, "When Food is Food and Love is Love," she talks about the automatic food-to-mouth action that is sometimes hard to break. I know this does at times apply to me, when for some reason I want to unhook myself (usually it's because I'm just plain tired and resisting relaxing/going to sleep), and I know unconsciously that I can count on a food fog to get me there. This also sometimes happens for me at work, where I use the food to soothe myself when I have a particularly repugnant job to perform.

I can really identify with your experience. I used to make chocolate chip cookies (allegedly for my husband) and then find I'd eaten most of the dough and have to make another batch for him!

There are some foods that, while they may not be literally addictive for me, might as well be. I have to be extra careful to check in with myself very often when I'm eating them because I am more inclined to overeat them, and most of the time I accomplish that by going blank. If I can gently pull myself out of the food and back to my body, I can usually stop the bingeing, even if I can't find a good reason why it started.

I read in one of the IE books (can't remember which) that if we're really practiced in suppressing our emotions with food, it may take a while to be able to identify what we're feeling. That makes sense to me, so I'm willing for now to just stop using the food in this way and keep looking at my emotions, which are often a real puzzle for me, too. I assume someday I'll get better at knowing what I'm actually feeling.

I hope this helps.

Laurie

So confused about my binge last night...

Hi everyone,

Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could have been that I felt like this was "my last chance" to eat them so I consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat anything that's sweet.

And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

Jen

[Guest guest]

Hi, Jen,

First of all, if you can, just let this incident go. It happened last night, and today is a new day. No need to add guilt on top of it all! This is not a "perfect 100% of the time" process--it's something you'll grow more and more into as you go along.

In Geneen's earlier book, "When Food is Food and Love is Love," she talks about the automatic food-to-mouth action that is sometimes hard to break. I know this does at times apply to me, when for some reason I want to unhook myself (usually it's because I'm just plain tired and resisting relaxing/going to sleep), and I know unconsciously that I can count on a food fog to get me there. This also sometimes happens for me at work, where I use the food to soothe myself when I have a particularly repugnant job to perform.

I can really identify with your experience. I used to make chocolate chip cookies (allegedly for my husband) and then find I'd eaten most of the dough and have to make another batch for him!

There are some foods that, while they may not be literally addictive for me, might as well be. I have to be extra careful to check in with myself very often when I'm eating them because I am more inclined to overeat them, and most of the time I accomplish that by going blank. If I can gently pull myself out of the food and back to my body, I can usually stop the bingeing, even if I can't find a good reason why it started.

I read in one of the IE books (can't remember which) that if we're really practiced in suppressing our emotions with food, it may take a while to be able to identify what we're feeling. That makes sense to me, so I'm willing for now to just stop using the food in this way and keep looking at my emotions, which are often a real puzzle for me, too. I assume someday I'll get better at knowing what I'm actually feeling.

I hope this helps.

Laurie

So confused about my binge last night...

Hi everyone,

Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could have been that I felt like this was "my last chance" to eat them so I consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat anything that's sweet.

And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

Jen

[Guest guest]

Hi, Jen,

First of all, if you can, just let this incident go. It happened last night, and today is a new day. No need to add guilt on top of it all! This is not a "perfect 100% of the time" process--it's something you'll grow more and more into as you go along.

In Geneen's earlier book, "When Food is Food and Love is Love," she talks about the automatic food-to-mouth action that is sometimes hard to break. I know this does at times apply to me, when for some reason I want to unhook myself (usually it's because I'm just plain tired and resisting relaxing/going to sleep), and I know unconsciously that I can count on a food fog to get me there. This also sometimes happens for me at work, where I use the food to soothe myself when I have a particularly repugnant job to perform.

I can really identify with your experience. I used to make chocolate chip cookies (allegedly for my husband) and then find I'd eaten most of the dough and have to make another batch for him!

There are some foods that, while they may not be literally addictive for me, might as well be. I have to be extra careful to check in with myself very often when I'm eating them because I am more inclined to overeat them, and most of the time I accomplish that by going blank. If I can gently pull myself out of the food and back to my body, I can usually stop the bingeing, even if I can't find a good reason why it started.

I read in one of the IE books (can't remember which) that if we're really practiced in suppressing our emotions with food, it may take a while to be able to identify what we're feeling. That makes sense to me, so I'm willing for now to just stop using the food in this way and keep looking at my emotions, which are often a real puzzle for me, too. I assume someday I'll get better at knowing what I'm actually feeling.

I hope this helps.

Laurie

So confused about my binge last night...

Hi everyone,

Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could have been that I felt like this was "my last chance" to eat them so I consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat anything that's sweet.

And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

Jen

[Guest guest]

Hi Jen,

Personally (and this is just me), I'm not all that certain about the sugar

addiction theory. I wish I could remember where I'd seen it, but I read

somewhere recently about the book by Kessler called the End of Overeating

(or something like that) that's gotten so much attention recently that talks

about how sugar and salt are addictive and how restaurants add those ingredients

to make sure people eat more. In any event, the person that was writing the

article I was reading was a dietician or some other professional and had

actually read the studies that Kessler was using to support his book and said

that the same studies talk a lot about the anxiety people feel when they eat

those things and how that also contributes to the overeating, but he doesn't

talk about that. I find that very interesting.

I think there's an agenda involved in making us believe we can't trust ourselves

around foods. I don't think the motive is malicious, but I'm just more and more

skeptical about it. I know that when I am feeling at ease with myself and when

" everything's right with the world, " so to speak, I can have one piece of

something sweet or salty and be perfectly satisfied and go on with my day. And

other times, I can't. If something is truly addictive, that shouldn't be the

case. Mabye I'm wrong, but it doesn't seem like drug and alcohol addicts have

times where they can just shoot up one time or have one drink and stop. That's

why I think it's not about addiction at all and it's more about what's going on

in my head at the time, consciously or unconsciously.

I attended an IE workshop this weekend with a therapist who specializes in

working with people with disordered eating, from folks like us all the way up to

people with clinical disorders, such as anorexia and bulimia. Anyway, she said

something really interesting. Which is that once you *really truly* believe a

food is not forbidden and that you can have what you want when you want, you

won't need to overeat it. I know that for me, I'm definitely legalizing foods

and feeling better about eating them, but something still feels taboo about

eating formerly forbidden foods. And I think that's why I'm struggling with

stopping when satisfied.

The other thing she said, and I know I do this too, is that sometimes overeating

is just a habit. I often come home in the evening and start grazing and I'll do

it for hours. It's partly about winding down, but I'm usually perfectly happy

just to chill out. So I don't think the eating here has some big significant

meaning. I think that I've just gotten in the habit of grazing to wind down and

now I do it without even thinking about it.

I don't intend to discount anyone else's experience. We certainly don't know

everything about the body, so it's entirely possible that substances have

addictive qualities for certain people. Each person has to decide for

themselves; that's part of listening to your body. But it has been really

helpful for me to hear these other points of view, too. Not only has it helped

me identify areas of my thought process that I need to continue to work on

(i.e., not being *completely* convinced that all foods are legal), but it's also

helpful for me to realize that not everything has some huge signficiant meaning

behind it. In the same way that I really needed to understand that being an

emotional eater doesn't have to mean that I'm eating to avoid some huge trauma

in my life, it's helpful to know that sometimes things happen because they're

habits, because habits can be changed with practice. That's why I also like the

term mindful eating. Sometimes, I think I'm just eating mindlessly and that

with more practice, I'll be more aware of what I'm doing so I can change it. No

need to give something more significance than it deserves.

Josie

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on

only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a

batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even

harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and

consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure

out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It

could have been that I felt like this was " my last chance " to eat them so I

consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I

want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It

could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt

like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen

disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat

anything that's sweet.

>

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jen,

Personally (and this is just me), I'm not all that certain about the sugar

addiction theory. I wish I could remember where I'd seen it, but I read

somewhere recently about the book by Kessler called the End of Overeating

(or something like that) that's gotten so much attention recently that talks

about how sugar and salt are addictive and how restaurants add those ingredients

to make sure people eat more. In any event, the person that was writing the

article I was reading was a dietician or some other professional and had

actually read the studies that Kessler was using to support his book and said

that the same studies talk a lot about the anxiety people feel when they eat

those things and how that also contributes to the overeating, but he doesn't

talk about that. I find that very interesting.

I think there's an agenda involved in making us believe we can't trust ourselves

around foods. I don't think the motive is malicious, but I'm just more and more

skeptical about it. I know that when I am feeling at ease with myself and when

" everything's right with the world, " so to speak, I can have one piece of

something sweet or salty and be perfectly satisfied and go on with my day. And

other times, I can't. If something is truly addictive, that shouldn't be the

case. Mabye I'm wrong, but it doesn't seem like drug and alcohol addicts have

times where they can just shoot up one time or have one drink and stop. That's

why I think it's not about addiction at all and it's more about what's going on

in my head at the time, consciously or unconsciously.

I attended an IE workshop this weekend with a therapist who specializes in

working with people with disordered eating, from folks like us all the way up to

people with clinical disorders, such as anorexia and bulimia. Anyway, she said

something really interesting. Which is that once you *really truly* believe a

food is not forbidden and that you can have what you want when you want, you

won't need to overeat it. I know that for me, I'm definitely legalizing foods

and feeling better about eating them, but something still feels taboo about

eating formerly forbidden foods. And I think that's why I'm struggling with

stopping when satisfied.

The other thing she said, and I know I do this too, is that sometimes overeating

is just a habit. I often come home in the evening and start grazing and I'll do

it for hours. It's partly about winding down, but I'm usually perfectly happy

just to chill out. So I don't think the eating here has some big significant

meaning. I think that I've just gotten in the habit of grazing to wind down and

now I do it without even thinking about it.

I don't intend to discount anyone else's experience. We certainly don't know

everything about the body, so it's entirely possible that substances have

addictive qualities for certain people. Each person has to decide for

themselves; that's part of listening to your body. But it has been really

helpful for me to hear these other points of view, too. Not only has it helped

me identify areas of my thought process that I need to continue to work on

(i.e., not being *completely* convinced that all foods are legal), but it's also

helpful for me to realize that not everything has some huge signficiant meaning

behind it. In the same way that I really needed to understand that being an

emotional eater doesn't have to mean that I'm eating to avoid some huge trauma

in my life, it's helpful to know that sometimes things happen because they're

habits, because habits can be changed with practice. That's why I also like the

term mindful eating. Sometimes, I think I'm just eating mindlessly and that

with more practice, I'll be more aware of what I'm doing so I can change it. No

need to give something more significance than it deserves.

Josie

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on

only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a

batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even

harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and

consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure

out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It

could have been that I felt like this was " my last chance " to eat them so I

consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I

want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It

could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt

like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen

disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat

anything that's sweet.

>

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jen,

Personally (and this is just me), I'm not all that certain about the sugar

addiction theory. I wish I could remember where I'd seen it, but I read

somewhere recently about the book by Kessler called the End of Overeating

(or something like that) that's gotten so much attention recently that talks

about how sugar and salt are addictive and how restaurants add those ingredients

to make sure people eat more. In any event, the person that was writing the

article I was reading was a dietician or some other professional and had

actually read the studies that Kessler was using to support his book and said

that the same studies talk a lot about the anxiety people feel when they eat

those things and how that also contributes to the overeating, but he doesn't

talk about that. I find that very interesting.

I think there's an agenda involved in making us believe we can't trust ourselves

around foods. I don't think the motive is malicious, but I'm just more and more

skeptical about it. I know that when I am feeling at ease with myself and when

" everything's right with the world, " so to speak, I can have one piece of

something sweet or salty and be perfectly satisfied and go on with my day. And

other times, I can't. If something is truly addictive, that shouldn't be the

case. Mabye I'm wrong, but it doesn't seem like drug and alcohol addicts have

times where they can just shoot up one time or have one drink and stop. That's

why I think it's not about addiction at all and it's more about what's going on

in my head at the time, consciously or unconsciously.

I attended an IE workshop this weekend with a therapist who specializes in

working with people with disordered eating, from folks like us all the way up to

people with clinical disorders, such as anorexia and bulimia. Anyway, she said

something really interesting. Which is that once you *really truly* believe a

food is not forbidden and that you can have what you want when you want, you

won't need to overeat it. I know that for me, I'm definitely legalizing foods

and feeling better about eating them, but something still feels taboo about

eating formerly forbidden foods. And I think that's why I'm struggling with

stopping when satisfied.

The other thing she said, and I know I do this too, is that sometimes overeating

is just a habit. I often come home in the evening and start grazing and I'll do

it for hours. It's partly about winding down, but I'm usually perfectly happy

just to chill out. So I don't think the eating here has some big significant

meaning. I think that I've just gotten in the habit of grazing to wind down and

now I do it without even thinking about it.

I don't intend to discount anyone else's experience. We certainly don't know

everything about the body, so it's entirely possible that substances have

addictive qualities for certain people. Each person has to decide for

themselves; that's part of listening to your body. But it has been really

helpful for me to hear these other points of view, too. Not only has it helped

me identify areas of my thought process that I need to continue to work on

(i.e., not being *completely* convinced that all foods are legal), but it's also

helpful for me to realize that not everything has some huge signficiant meaning

behind it. In the same way that I really needed to understand that being an

emotional eater doesn't have to mean that I'm eating to avoid some huge trauma

in my life, it's helpful to know that sometimes things happen because they're

habits, because habits can be changed with practice. That's why I also like the

term mindful eating. Sometimes, I think I'm just eating mindlessly and that

with more practice, I'll be more aware of what I'm doing so I can change it. No

need to give something more significance than it deserves.

Josie

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on

only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a

batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even

harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and

consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure

out why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It

could have been that I felt like this was " my last chance " to eat them so I

consumed all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I

want (and have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It

could have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt

like I kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen

disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat

anything that's sweet.

>

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Jen,

You don't have to know why you binged right now. Your understanding about how

you respond to food is developing and will get much more clear over time. Any

time I had a binge in the beginning, I would compassionately go right back to my

IE practice. I knew that I had an opportunity to honor my hunger and fullness at

my next meal. I personally responded to what and Elyse wrote in Intuitive

eating about the fact that one meal or one binge does not ruin your process. Our

bodies have the ability to balance out over time. There's also a section in the

IE book entitled " A Strange Gift " on page 162 that provides insight into

overeating episodes.

There are a variety of things that could be going on with your relationship with

those chocolates. I've found that my compulsions around certain foods were

usually related to some type of emotion of physiological discomfort. Have you

been experiencing any specific uncomfortable feelings or stress over the last

few days or week that could have come out through the binge?

It sounds like there's some awareness missing in your relationship with those

chocolates. It doesn't sound like you got the opportunity to allow your body to

be truly mindful with that food. I'd experiment with them and allow myself to

actually look at them, touch them, smell them, and taste them in order to

discover my intuitive sense about eating that food. There are certain high sugar

foods like salt water taffy that I never get clear fullness signals while eating

them. Instead, I've noticed that I get to a point of feeling a " yuck " sensation

as my only indicator to stop. So, I've decided to pretty much pass on that food,

which doesn't really provide me with much pleasure anyway. You also could be

allergic to an ingredient in the chocolates.

I'm curious...why did you make the chocolates last night? What was your

motivation?

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Jen,

You don't have to know why you binged right now. Your understanding about how

you respond to food is developing and will get much more clear over time. Any

time I had a binge in the beginning, I would compassionately go right back to my

IE practice. I knew that I had an opportunity to honor my hunger and fullness at

my next meal. I personally responded to what and Elyse wrote in Intuitive

eating about the fact that one meal or one binge does not ruin your process. Our

bodies have the ability to balance out over time. There's also a section in the

IE book entitled " A Strange Gift " on page 162 that provides insight into

overeating episodes.

There are a variety of things that could be going on with your relationship with

those chocolates. I've found that my compulsions around certain foods were

usually related to some type of emotion of physiological discomfort. Have you

been experiencing any specific uncomfortable feelings or stress over the last

few days or week that could have come out through the binge?

It sounds like there's some awareness missing in your relationship with those

chocolates. It doesn't sound like you got the opportunity to allow your body to

be truly mindful with that food. I'd experiment with them and allow myself to

actually look at them, touch them, smell them, and taste them in order to

discover my intuitive sense about eating that food. There are certain high sugar

foods like salt water taffy that I never get clear fullness signals while eating

them. Instead, I've noticed that I get to a point of feeling a " yuck " sensation

as my only indicator to stop. So, I've decided to pretty much pass on that food,

which doesn't really provide me with much pleasure anyway. You also could be

allergic to an ingredient in the chocolates.

I'm curious...why did you make the chocolates last night? What was your

motivation?

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Jen,

You don't have to know why you binged right now. Your understanding about how

you respond to food is developing and will get much more clear over time. Any

time I had a binge in the beginning, I would compassionately go right back to my

IE practice. I knew that I had an opportunity to honor my hunger and fullness at

my next meal. I personally responded to what and Elyse wrote in Intuitive

eating about the fact that one meal or one binge does not ruin your process. Our

bodies have the ability to balance out over time. There's also a section in the

IE book entitled " A Strange Gift " on page 162 that provides insight into

overeating episodes.

There are a variety of things that could be going on with your relationship with

those chocolates. I've found that my compulsions around certain foods were

usually related to some type of emotion of physiological discomfort. Have you

been experiencing any specific uncomfortable feelings or stress over the last

few days or week that could have come out through the binge?

It sounds like there's some awareness missing in your relationship with those

chocolates. It doesn't sound like you got the opportunity to allow your body to

be truly mindful with that food. I'd experiment with them and allow myself to

actually look at them, touch them, smell them, and taste them in order to

discover my intuitive sense about eating that food. There are certain high sugar

foods like salt water taffy that I never get clear fullness signals while eating

them. Instead, I've noticed that I get to a point of feeling a " yuck " sensation

as my only indicator to stop. So, I've decided to pretty much pass on that food,

which doesn't really provide me with much pleasure anyway. You also could be

allergic to an ingredient in the chocolates.

I'm curious...why did you make the chocolates last night? What was your

motivation?

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the feedback!

Well, my motivation in making them was basically that I was in the mood for

chocolate and my body seemed to be okay with that and I knew that depriving

myself of them contradicts what I am trying to accomplish. So I made them,

hoping I would save lots of them for later! That didn't happen!

Thanks for reassuring me that I don't have to know WHY I binged right now. It's

a work in process and I have to forgive myself for not always knowing.

>

> > And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that

this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

> >

> > Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> > Jen

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the feedback!

Well, my motivation in making them was basically that I was in the mood for

chocolate and my body seemed to be okay with that and I knew that depriving

myself of them contradicts what I am trying to accomplish. So I made them,

hoping I would save lots of them for later! That didn't happen!

Thanks for reassuring me that I don't have to know WHY I binged right now. It's

a work in process and I have to forgive myself for not always knowing.

>

> > And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that

this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

> >

> > Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> > Jen

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the feedback!

Well, my motivation in making them was basically that I was in the mood for

chocolate and my body seemed to be okay with that and I knew that depriving

myself of them contradicts what I am trying to accomplish. So I made them,

hoping I would save lots of them for later! That didn't happen!

Thanks for reassuring me that I don't have to know WHY I binged right now. It's

a work in process and I have to forgive myself for not always knowing.

>

> > And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that

this will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

> >

> > Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> > Jen

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you all for your input. I REALLY appreciate it. I feel less angry with

myself now and realize that it can't be perfect right away. Or ever, really.

Evening is always much more difficult for me in terms of compulsive eating. I am

still trying to figure out why that is. No luck yet- but I don't intend to give

up.

I know that night time is a tough time for many people regarding binge eating. I

wonder why that is....

Thanks again,

Jen

>

>

> Hi, Jen,

>

> First of all, if you can, just let this incident go. It happened last night,

and today is a new day. No need to add guilt on top of it all! This is not a

" perfect 100% of the time " process--it's something you'll grow more and more

into as you go along.

>

> In Geneen's earlier book, " When Food is Food and Love is Love, " she talks

about the automatic food-to-mouth action that is sometimes hard to break. I know

this does at times apply to me, when for some reason I want to unhook myself

(usually it's because I'm just plain tired and resisting relaxing/going to

sleep), and I know unconsciously that I can count on a food fog to get me there.

This also sometimes happens for me at work, where I use the food to soothe

myself when I have a particularly repugnant job to perform.

>

> I can really identify with your experience. I used to make chocolate chip

cookies (allegedly for my husband) and then find I'd eaten most of the dough and

have to make another batch for him!

>

> There are some foods that, while they may not be literally addictive for me,

might as well be. I have to be extra careful to check in with myself very often

when I'm eating them because I am more inclined to overeat them, and most of the

time I accomplish that by going blank. If I can gently pull myself out of the

food and back to my body, I can usually stop the bingeing, even if I can't find

a good reason why it started.

>

> I read in one of the IE books (can't remember which) that if we're really

practiced in suppressing our emotions with food, it may take a while to be able

to identify what we're feeling. That makes sense to me, so I'm willing for now

to just stop using the food in this way and keep looking at my emotions, which

are often a real puzzle for me, too. I assume someday I'll get better at knowing

what I'm actually feeling.

>

> I hope this helps.

>

> Laurie

>

>

>

>

>

>

> So confused about my binge last night...

>

>

>

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on

only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a

batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even

harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and

consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out

why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could

have been that I felt like this was " my last chance " to eat them so I consumed

all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and

have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could

have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I

kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen

disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat

anything that's sweet.

>

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you all for your input. I REALLY appreciate it. I feel less angry with

myself now and realize that it can't be perfect right away. Or ever, really.

Evening is always much more difficult for me in terms of compulsive eating. I am

still trying to figure out why that is. No luck yet- but I don't intend to give

up.

I know that night time is a tough time for many people regarding binge eating. I

wonder why that is....

Thanks again,

Jen

>

>

> Hi, Jen,

>

> First of all, if you can, just let this incident go. It happened last night,

and today is a new day. No need to add guilt on top of it all! This is not a

" perfect 100% of the time " process--it's something you'll grow more and more

into as you go along.

>

> In Geneen's earlier book, " When Food is Food and Love is Love, " she talks

about the automatic food-to-mouth action that is sometimes hard to break. I know

this does at times apply to me, when for some reason I want to unhook myself

(usually it's because I'm just plain tired and resisting relaxing/going to

sleep), and I know unconsciously that I can count on a food fog to get me there.

This also sometimes happens for me at work, where I use the food to soothe

myself when I have a particularly repugnant job to perform.

>

> I can really identify with your experience. I used to make chocolate chip

cookies (allegedly for my husband) and then find I'd eaten most of the dough and

have to make another batch for him!

>

> There are some foods that, while they may not be literally addictive for me,

might as well be. I have to be extra careful to check in with myself very often

when I'm eating them because I am more inclined to overeat them, and most of the

time I accomplish that by going blank. If I can gently pull myself out of the

food and back to my body, I can usually stop the bingeing, even if I can't find

a good reason why it started.

>

> I read in one of the IE books (can't remember which) that if we're really

practiced in suppressing our emotions with food, it may take a while to be able

to identify what we're feeling. That makes sense to me, so I'm willing for now

to just stop using the food in this way and keep looking at my emotions, which

are often a real puzzle for me, too. I assume someday I'll get better at knowing

what I'm actually feeling.

>

> I hope this helps.

>

> Laurie

>

>

>

>

>

>

> So confused about my binge last night...

>

>

>

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on

only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a

batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even

harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and

consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out

why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could

have been that I felt like this was " my last chance " to eat them so I consumed

all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and

have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could

have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I

kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen

disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat

anything that's sweet.

>

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you all for your input. I REALLY appreciate it. I feel less angry with

myself now and realize that it can't be perfect right away. Or ever, really.

Evening is always much more difficult for me in terms of compulsive eating. I am

still trying to figure out why that is. No luck yet- but I don't intend to give

up.

I know that night time is a tough time for many people regarding binge eating. I

wonder why that is....

Thanks again,

Jen

>

>

> Hi, Jen,

>

> First of all, if you can, just let this incident go. It happened last night,

and today is a new day. No need to add guilt on top of it all! This is not a

" perfect 100% of the time " process--it's something you'll grow more and more

into as you go along.

>

> In Geneen's earlier book, " When Food is Food and Love is Love, " she talks

about the automatic food-to-mouth action that is sometimes hard to break. I know

this does at times apply to me, when for some reason I want to unhook myself

(usually it's because I'm just plain tired and resisting relaxing/going to

sleep), and I know unconsciously that I can count on a food fog to get me there.

This also sometimes happens for me at work, where I use the food to soothe

myself when I have a particularly repugnant job to perform.

>

> I can really identify with your experience. I used to make chocolate chip

cookies (allegedly for my husband) and then find I'd eaten most of the dough and

have to make another batch for him!

>

> There are some foods that, while they may not be literally addictive for me,

might as well be. I have to be extra careful to check in with myself very often

when I'm eating them because I am more inclined to overeat them, and most of the

time I accomplish that by going blank. If I can gently pull myself out of the

food and back to my body, I can usually stop the bingeing, even if I can't find

a good reason why it started.

>

> I read in one of the IE books (can't remember which) that if we're really

practiced in suppressing our emotions with food, it may take a while to be able

to identify what we're feeling. That makes sense to me, so I'm willing for now

to just stop using the food in this way and keep looking at my emotions, which

are often a real puzzle for me, too. I assume someday I'll get better at knowing

what I'm actually feeling.

>

> I hope this helps.

>

> Laurie

>

>

>

>

>

>

> So confused about my binge last night...

>

>

>

>

> Hi everyone,

>

> Well, I've been working on Geneen's guidelines, rereading WFG and working on

only eating when I'm hungry/stopping when satisfied etc. Last night I made a

batch of chocolates and ended up eating the entire thing (before I could even

harden them in the refrigerator. Then I made another batch immediately after and

consumed that in an instant. I was SO sick afterwards. And I couldn't figure out

why I did it. I explored and explored and just couldn't figure it out. It could

have been that I felt like this was " my last chance " to eat them so I consumed

all I could- but I have been telling myself that I can eat whatever I want (and

have been following that philosophy) so that didn't seem plausible. It could

have been a thousand different emotions. I don't know. It honestly felt like I

kept going because the chocolates were addictive. And I know that Geneen

disregards this idea, but it honestly feels like this is the case when I eat

anything that's sweet.

>

> And now I feel guilty because I don't know WHY I did it. And scared that this

will hinder the process (if I don't figure it out!)

>

> Sorry for rambling- I just didn't know where else to turn!

> Jen

>

[Guest guest]

Hi, Josie,

Your point about it not having to have some "huge significant meaning" reminded me of Oprah's statement on the second Geneen Roth show, when she said that she reaches for food often over the smallest things--not major traumas, just minor discomforts.

I think for me the difference is that I somewhere in my psyche believe that food will somehow make things better. It's not that anything is hugely wrong...just that I somehow learned at an early age to turn to food to handle even small discomforts.

Laurie

Josie wrote:

>>>I don't intend to discount anyone else's experience. We certainly don't know everything about the body, so it's entirely possible that substances have addictive qualities for certain people. Each person has to decide for themselves; that's part of listening to your body. But it has been really helpful for me to hear these other points of view, too. Not only has it helped me identify areas of my thought process that I need to continue to work on (i.e., not being *completely* convinced that all foods are legal), but it's also helpful for me to realize that not everything has some huge signficiant meaning behind it. In the same way that I really needed to understand that being an emotional eater doesn't have to mean that I'm eating to avoid some huge trauma in my life, it's helpful to know that sometimes things happen because they're habits, because habits can be changed with practice. That's why I also like the term mindful eating. Sometimes, I think I'm just eating mind lessly and that with more practice, I'll be more aware of what I'm doing so I can change it. No need to give something more significance than it deserves.

<<<

[Guest guest]

Latoya,

Well, it seems that most evenings I gravitate towards chocolate. It consumes me-

the concept of it. The cravings dominate my mind and I am likely confusing my

mind's cravings for my body's cravings. I think that's what I have so much

trouble with. Determining what my BODY wants vs what my mind wants. I just don't

know how to do it. My mind takes over it seems- especially in the evenings.

You mentioned that you wait until you are sure that your body wants those

particular foods at the time. How do you do it?

Thanks,

Jen

> >

> > Thanks for the feedback!

> >

> > Well, my motivation in making them was basically that I was in the mood for

chocolate and my body seemed to be okay with that and I knew that depriving

myself of them contradicts what I am trying to accomplish. So I made them,

hoping I would save lots of them for later! That didn't happen!

> >

> > Thanks for reassuring me that I don't have to know WHY I binged right now.

It's a work in process and I have to forgive myself for not always knowing.

>

[Guest guest]

Jen,

What is it about the chocolate? Is it the smell? The taste? The look? The

temporary blissful escape that it provides? Pleasurable/ comforting memories?

Get to know what that chocolate means to you and what it's helping you

achieve...put a piece of chocolate in front of you and journal about it...it may

have a message for you.

The most important thing that I did in my IE practice was to allow my body to

lead by learning and tracking my hunger, responding to my hunger, and eventually

learning how to honor my fullness. With each meal that I recognized and honored

my hunger signals, my eating awareness gradually shifted from my mind into my

belly and now radiates up my esophagus and into my mouth. I also believe that I

can now sense if a food will actually feel good in my belly and not just in my

head.

Dieting and all of the food rules we've internalized from our family and society

has kept our eating awareness mostly in our minds and disconnected from our

bodies. This situation has left most of us vulnerable to getting caught up in

obsessive " thoughts " about food. IE helps us shift eating awareness back into

its natural domain: the body, while we also learn how to utilize nutrition

information in an easeful way.

You're not alone! It's much easier to honor our hunger and fullness signals in

the morning when our awareness is fresh and our minds aren't tuckered out from a

long day and want to zone. Eventually, honoring your hunger and knowing what

your body wants will become strong automatic habits that we dominate in the

evenings as well. So, it will be easier to respond to your true hunger than to

eat for mind/emotional reasons.

Latoya:)

>

> Latoya,

>

> Well, it seems that most evenings I gravitate towards chocolate. It consumes

me- the concept of it. The cravings dominate my mind and I am likely confusing

my mind's cravings for my body's cravings. I think that's what I have so much

trouble with. Determining what my BODY wants vs what my mind wants. I just don't

know how to do it. My mind takes over it seems- especially in the evenings.

>

> You mentioned that you wait until you are sure that your body wants those

particular foods at the time. How do you do it?

>

> Thanks,

> Jen

[Guest guest]

Hi Jen,

I haven't been on my email, so I'm a little late on this discussion I think, but

I just had to give my chocolate story! I too am a chocoholic and have always

been. I think dieting has blown this particular food into the end all be all

bliss food for me! Before IE, I tried to keep chocolate out of the house

altogether.

I posted here a few weeks ago that I had purchased numerous chocolate bars so

that I no longer felt incredibly deprived of this treat. I was trying to

distract myself from how badly I wanted to eat all of them in one sitting! I

can hardly believe it but there are still like 3 chocolate bars in my kitchen!

I ate small chunks daily for awhile, and now I forgot that it's even there. My

brain isn't screaming " Go eat the chocolate! " every night anymore!!

This is a HUGE IE success for me! I have control around chocolate for the

first time. I now believe in Intuitive Eating more than before.

All the best to you!!

> > >

> > > Thanks for the feedback!

> > >

> > > Well, my motivation in making them was basically that I was in the mood

for chocolate and my body seemed to be okay with that and I knew that depriving

myself of them contradicts what I am trying to accomplish. So I made them,

hoping I would save lots of them for later! That didn't happen!

> > >

> > > Thanks for reassuring me that I don't have to know WHY I binged right now.

It's a work in process and I have to forgive myself for not always knowing.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jen,

I haven't been on my email, so I'm a little late on this discussion I think, but

I just had to give my chocolate story! I too am a chocoholic and have always

been. I think dieting has blown this particular food into the end all be all

bliss food for me! Before IE, I tried to keep chocolate out of the house

altogether.

I posted here a few weeks ago that I had purchased numerous chocolate bars so

that I no longer felt incredibly deprived of this treat. I was trying to

distract myself from how badly I wanted to eat all of them in one sitting! I

can hardly believe it but there are still like 3 chocolate bars in my kitchen!

I ate small chunks daily for awhile, and now I forgot that it's even there. My

brain isn't screaming " Go eat the chocolate! " every night anymore!!

This is a HUGE IE success for me! I have control around chocolate for the

first time. I now believe in Intuitive Eating more than before.

All the best to you!!

> > >

> > > Thanks for the feedback!

> > >

> > > Well, my motivation in making them was basically that I was in the mood

for chocolate and my body seemed to be okay with that and I knew that depriving

myself of them contradicts what I am trying to accomplish. So I made them,

hoping I would save lots of them for later! That didn't happen!

> > >

> > > Thanks for reassuring me that I don't have to know WHY I binged right now.

It's a work in process and I have to forgive myself for not always knowing.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Jen,

I haven't been on my email, so I'm a little late on this discussion I think, but

I just had to give my chocolate story! I too am a chocoholic and have always

been. I think dieting has blown this particular food into the end all be all

bliss food for me! Before IE, I tried to keep chocolate out of the house

altogether.

I posted here a few weeks ago that I had purchased numerous chocolate bars so

that I no longer felt incredibly deprived of this treat. I was trying to

distract myself from how badly I wanted to eat all of them in one sitting! I

can hardly believe it but there are still like 3 chocolate bars in my kitchen!

I ate small chunks daily for awhile, and now I forgot that it's even there. My

brain isn't screaming " Go eat the chocolate! " every night anymore!!

This is a HUGE IE success for me! I have control around chocolate for the

first time. I now believe in Intuitive Eating more than before.

All the best to you!!

> > >

> > > Thanks for the feedback!

> > >

> > > Well, my motivation in making them was basically that I was in the mood

for chocolate and my body seemed to be okay with that and I knew that depriving

myself of them contradicts what I am trying to accomplish. So I made them,

hoping I would save lots of them for later! That didn't happen!

> > >

> > > Thanks for reassuring me that I don't have to know WHY I binged right now.

It's a work in process and I have to forgive myself for not always knowing.

> >

>