Guest guest Posted July 21, 2010 Report Share Posted July 21, 2010 this is really weird, and scary...MY nada asked me if I'd donate a kidney to one of my siblings if they needed it ( none of them were ever sick) what IS it with them ??? I told her it would depend on what happened to the first...damaged by drug/alcohol, no, I would not... Jackie Funny you should bring up the kidney scenario - my mom actually used that on me one time! I had cut off all contact with my world-class sociopath brother and his alcoholic babymama, and my mother tried to guilt me in to having a relationship with them because their child (an innocent, to be sure) " might need a kidney someday " and I wouldn't be there to give her mine. It never occurred to her that if the child's parents wanted to have a close family circle of organ donors, they might consider not being such total a##holes. But to answer your question - yes, I did worry about losing contact with whatever tenuously connected distant cousins there are on Mom's side of the family - but they are all living in the same area as she does, so seeing them would almost always mean going through her. I decided there are consequences to any decision, and a pro/con analysis came down clearly on the " con " side of remaining enmeshed with Mom. Some bridges are just gonna have to burn, I guess. Besides, the way she " runs through " her family and friends, she's already burned the bridges in front of me. My main concern is that they'd think I'm like her - guilt by association. I do hold out hope that someday I'll run into these folks and they'll acknowledge what a problem she was, and we can go on from there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 21, 2010 Report Share Posted July 21, 2010 this is really weird, and scary...MY nada asked me if I'd donate a kidney to one of my siblings if they needed it ( none of them were ever sick) what IS it with them ??? I told her it would depend on what happened to the first...damaged by drug/alcohol, no, I would not... Jackie Funny you should bring up the kidney scenario - my mom actually used that on me one time! I had cut off all contact with my world-class sociopath brother and his alcoholic babymama, and my mother tried to guilt me in to having a relationship with them because their child (an innocent, to be sure) " might need a kidney someday " and I wouldn't be there to give her mine. It never occurred to her that if the child's parents wanted to have a close family circle of organ donors, they might consider not being such total a##holes. But to answer your question - yes, I did worry about losing contact with whatever tenuously connected distant cousins there are on Mom's side of the family - but they are all living in the same area as she does, so seeing them would almost always mean going through her. I decided there are consequences to any decision, and a pro/con analysis came down clearly on the " con " side of remaining enmeshed with Mom. Some bridges are just gonna have to burn, I guess. Besides, the way she " runs through " her family and friends, she's already burned the bridges in front of me. My main concern is that they'd think I'm like her - guilt by association. I do hold out hope that someday I'll run into these folks and they'll acknowledge what a problem she was, and we can go on from there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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