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Raina,Have you read Geneen Roth's new book, Women, Food, and God? i don't remember much of what she said, but she did talk about this issue a fair bit, and i remember liking what she said. she had one chapter in particular, " It's not about the weight, but it's not not about the weight " that i think really speaks to the issue you are struggling with.

IE is tough because there really are no rules... but that's hopefully to allow you to explore your relationship with food, knowing there are no boundaries. However, I continued to use food as my primary coping mechanism for dealing with life, it's not really intuitive eating (to my mind), it's just more emotional or unconscious eating. So maybe you need to check in with yourself about how you are using food? are you paying attention to hunger and satiety when you eat? are you eating consciously, or mostly when you do other things?

another book i really liked is called I Can Make You Thin by McKenna. he introduced me to the idea of you can eat whatever you want and lose weight.... but only if you pay attention to hunger and satiety. i actually am not sure that i can lose weight, regardless, because of hormonal imbalances but his was the first book that made me stop dieting and start paying attention to eating. 

finally, maybe you want to think about speaking with a nutritionist (trained in IE)? or a therapist.it sounds like you are in a really tough spot. we are all here to support you however we can.

best,abby 

 

I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling.

Raina

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Hi Abby,I have Geneen's book and I need to read it again. I don't remember anything she said. How sad is that? Thanks for your response. I am going to try posting more and stop buying a lot of junk food. Sent from my iPhone

Raina,Have you read Geneen Roth's new book, Women, Food, and God? i don't remember much of what she said, but she did talk about this issue a fair bit, and i remember liking what she said. she had one chapter in particular, "It's not about the weight, but it's not not about the weight" that i think really speaks to the issue you are struggling with.

IE is tough because there really are no rules... but that's hopefully to allow you to explore your relationship with food, knowing there are no boundaries. However, I continued to use food as my primary coping mechanism for dealing with life, it's not really intuitive eating (to my mind), it's just more emotional or unconscious eating. So maybe you need to check in with yourself about how you are using food? are you paying attention to hunger and satiety when you eat? are you eating consciously, or mostly when you do other things?

another book i really liked is called I Can Make You Thin by McKenna. he introduced me to the idea of you can eat whatever you want and lose weight.... but only if you pay attention to hunger and satiety. i actually am not sure that i can lose weight, regardless, because of hormonal imbalances but his was the first book that made me stop dieting and start paying attention to eating.

finally, maybe you want to think about speaking with a nutritionist (trained in IE)? or a therapist.it sounds like you are in a really tough spot. we are all here to support you however we can.

best,abby

I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling.

Raina

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Hi Abby,I have Geneen's book and I need to read it again. I don't remember anything she said. How sad is that? Thanks for your response. I am going to try posting more and stop buying a lot of junk food. Sent from my iPhone

Raina,Have you read Geneen Roth's new book, Women, Food, and God? i don't remember much of what she said, but she did talk about this issue a fair bit, and i remember liking what she said. she had one chapter in particular, "It's not about the weight, but it's not not about the weight" that i think really speaks to the issue you are struggling with.

IE is tough because there really are no rules... but that's hopefully to allow you to explore your relationship with food, knowing there are no boundaries. However, I continued to use food as my primary coping mechanism for dealing with life, it's not really intuitive eating (to my mind), it's just more emotional or unconscious eating. So maybe you need to check in with yourself about how you are using food? are you paying attention to hunger and satiety when you eat? are you eating consciously, or mostly when you do other things?

another book i really liked is called I Can Make You Thin by McKenna. he introduced me to the idea of you can eat whatever you want and lose weight.... but only if you pay attention to hunger and satiety. i actually am not sure that i can lose weight, regardless, because of hormonal imbalances but his was the first book that made me stop dieting and start paying attention to eating.

finally, maybe you want to think about speaking with a nutritionist (trained in IE)? or a therapist.it sounds like you are in a really tough spot. we are all here to support you however we can.

best,abby

I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling.

Raina

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Hi Abby,I have Geneen's book and I need to read it again. I don't remember anything she said. How sad is that? Thanks for your response. I am going to try posting more and stop buying a lot of junk food. Sent from my iPhone

Raina,Have you read Geneen Roth's new book, Women, Food, and God? i don't remember much of what she said, but she did talk about this issue a fair bit, and i remember liking what she said. she had one chapter in particular, "It's not about the weight, but it's not not about the weight" that i think really speaks to the issue you are struggling with.

IE is tough because there really are no rules... but that's hopefully to allow you to explore your relationship with food, knowing there are no boundaries. However, I continued to use food as my primary coping mechanism for dealing with life, it's not really intuitive eating (to my mind), it's just more emotional or unconscious eating. So maybe you need to check in with yourself about how you are using food? are you paying attention to hunger and satiety when you eat? are you eating consciously, or mostly when you do other things?

another book i really liked is called I Can Make You Thin by McKenna. he introduced me to the idea of you can eat whatever you want and lose weight.... but only if you pay attention to hunger and satiety. i actually am not sure that i can lose weight, regardless, because of hormonal imbalances but his was the first book that made me stop dieting and start paying attention to eating.

finally, maybe you want to think about speaking with a nutritionist (trained in IE)? or a therapist.it sounds like you are in a really tough spot. we are all here to support you however we can.

best,abby

I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling.

Raina

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These are some great ideas. I will have to try some myself....One day I am all over this IE and then another is like what ,,what is IE? No I don't want to.

I just cant seem to motivate myself like I used to perhaps I am just burned out after 40 some years of yoyo dieting that I just cant seem to have fun with this stuff or there isn't anything to look forward to like there was with the new next diet, the preparation, the opening of a new book, the new promise, the new shoes it all goes with this. Now I just feel me and I don't like it

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wed, September 1, 2010 12:10:44 AMSubject: Re: Ready to give up...

Good Luck, Raina.

The process is challenging... To me, I had to do a bit of prayer work about compulsive eating...I don't want to make IE into a reason to eat emotionally or compulsively. It's working for me so far. I don't know if my weight has changed, but I find myself NOT craving junk. I don't really like dry pastries...never knew that until starting this.

But, it seems that one must dig deep...

What about exercise? Do you enjoy exercising for fun? Do you enjoy being strong? Do you enjoy looking at healthy foods because it's FUN to nourish yourself?

Just some ideas on turning the tables around a bit. I love to exercise...but when I resisted it it was some sort of inner body fight. Now I do it more regularly than before...3-4 times a week. When I stopped "dieting", and focus on hunger (without getting obsessive about hunger vs. nonhunger) I'm more relaxed. BUT...peace of mind has happened from this process. I don't know if there is physical difference...but what's most important to me is peace of mind.

The simple processes are hard...being totally brutally honest with self to the core...it's a challenge. What do you like about junk food? Why is it the only thing you want to ingest? Is it the salt? the fat? Why is it so appealing? Past diets? Have you tried eating a piece of fruit for pleasure only, just to see if you could taste some yummyness there? What healthy foods do you like? how could you gravitate towards them compassionately? I'm new to this process so if any of this is counter the IE program someone please clarify!

Dairy products contribute to reflux in some people. When I have eaten dairy the reflux flares up, when I cut it out of my diet it's gone. For some people lactose intolerance manifests as the valve to the stomach staying open, hence when people are asleep the acid travels up. Happens to me!

I'm just throwing some ideas out there...best of luck to you. Keep writing to us...we care about you and support you in your process!

Best wishes,

I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I

just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling. Raina

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These are some great ideas. I will have to try some myself....One day I am all over this IE and then another is like what ,,what is IE? No I don't want to.

I just cant seem to motivate myself like I used to perhaps I am just burned out after 40 some years of yoyo dieting that I just cant seem to have fun with this stuff or there isn't anything to look forward to like there was with the new next diet, the preparation, the opening of a new book, the new promise, the new shoes it all goes with this. Now I just feel me and I don't like it

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wed, September 1, 2010 12:10:44 AMSubject: Re: Ready to give up...

Good Luck, Raina.

The process is challenging... To me, I had to do a bit of prayer work about compulsive eating...I don't want to make IE into a reason to eat emotionally or compulsively. It's working for me so far. I don't know if my weight has changed, but I find myself NOT craving junk. I don't really like dry pastries...never knew that until starting this.

But, it seems that one must dig deep...

What about exercise? Do you enjoy exercising for fun? Do you enjoy being strong? Do you enjoy looking at healthy foods because it's FUN to nourish yourself?

Just some ideas on turning the tables around a bit. I love to exercise...but when I resisted it it was some sort of inner body fight. Now I do it more regularly than before...3-4 times a week. When I stopped "dieting", and focus on hunger (without getting obsessive about hunger vs. nonhunger) I'm more relaxed. BUT...peace of mind has happened from this process. I don't know if there is physical difference...but what's most important to me is peace of mind.

The simple processes are hard...being totally brutally honest with self to the core...it's a challenge. What do you like about junk food? Why is it the only thing you want to ingest? Is it the salt? the fat? Why is it so appealing? Past diets? Have you tried eating a piece of fruit for pleasure only, just to see if you could taste some yummyness there? What healthy foods do you like? how could you gravitate towards them compassionately? I'm new to this process so if any of this is counter the IE program someone please clarify!

Dairy products contribute to reflux in some people. When I have eaten dairy the reflux flares up, when I cut it out of my diet it's gone. For some people lactose intolerance manifests as the valve to the stomach staying open, hence when people are asleep the acid travels up. Happens to me!

I'm just throwing some ideas out there...best of luck to you. Keep writing to us...we care about you and support you in your process!

Best wishes,

I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I

just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling. Raina

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Laurie, I was really interested to read this.  I was just diagnosed with GERD a couple of weeks ago and the doctor put me on 2 Prilosec per day.  It has helped, but I really don't like taking meds if I can get by without...I have read elsewhere about the vinegar and am wondering if I shouldn't try it....but now I am afraid to quit taking the meds because the reflux was so bad before the meds...did you take meds before trying the vinegar?

Sue

 

I have had total relief from acid reflux by drinking a small amount of Bragg Apple Cider Vinegar each day. You can find Bragg brand in health food stores and most major grocery chains; it has a cloudiness at the bottom they call " the mother " that is especially beneficial, though other people swear any old apple cider vinegar will do. If you use the Bragg brand, do not refrigerate, and shake before using. I take 1 to 2 teaspoons per day. I like to mix it into ginger tea (which is also beneficial to digestion). Usually I just sip it throughout the day, but sometimes I drink it all in the morning--depends on how I feel. I don't mind the taste (actually sort of like it; Bragg has, I think, a less strong taste than others), but some people prefer it mixed with honey. You can also drink it just mixed with water (and honey, if you like) rather than tea.

 

I am now able to eat anything I want without any reflux at all. On days when I know we'll be going somewhere that I may be eating something that would usually cause problems, I take the higher amount (2 teaspoons) and sometimes will have a second cup of the tea after I get home. This has been a godsend for me. I no longer have to take any GERD medications.

 

You can find some information and testimonials here:

http://www.apple-cider-vinegar-benefits.com/vinegar-and-acid-reflux.html

 

I also use a wedge pillow under my sheet, which initially helped me before I started the vinegar, but now I keep using just because I sleep better with it than without. They sell them in all sorts of elevations; mine is relatively low elevation and suits me perfectly. You can find them on amazon.com and lots of other places--just google " wedge pillow. " I think mine cost about $35 and was worth every penny.

 

I hope this information is as helpful for others as was for me.

Laurie

-- Sue on FritzCheck out my blogs at: http://alifeofbooks.blogspot.com/http://suesresearch.blogspot.com

http://suesretirementmusings.blogspot.com/Check out my books on Goodreads: <

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Hey . I do like to work out. I actually did turbo jam and zumba last night. I'm not really sure why I just want junk food. I just love to eat. I know there are emotional issues that I need to explore more. Sent from my iPhone

Good Luck, Raina.The process is challenging... To me, I had to do a bit of prayer work about compulsive eating...I don't want to make IE into a reason to eat emotionally or compulsively. It's working for me so far. I don't know if my weight has changed, but I find myself NOT craving junk. I don't really like dry pastries...never knew that until starting this.But, it seems that one must dig deep... What about exercise? Do you enjoy exercising for fun? Do you enjoy being strong? Do you enjoy looking at healthy foods because it's FUN to nourish yourself? Just some ideas on turning the tables around a bit. I love to exercise...but when I resisted it it was some sort of inner body fight. Now I do it more regularly than before...3-4 times a week. When I stopped "dieting", and focus on hunger (without getting obsessive about hunger vs. nonhunger) I'm more relaxed. BUT...peace of mind has happened from this process. I don't know if there is physical difference...but what's most important to me is peace of mind.The simple processes are hard...being totally brutally honest with self to the core...it's a challenge. What do you like about junk food? Why is it the only thing you want to ingest? Is it the salt? the fat? Why is it so appealing? Past diets? Have you tried eating a piece of fruit for pleasure only, just to see if you could taste some yummyness there? What healthy foods do you like? how could you gravitate towards them compassionately? I'm new to this process so if any of this is counter the IE program someone please clarify!Dairy products contribute to reflux in some people. When I have eaten dairy the reflux flares up, when I cut it out of my diet it's gone. For some people lactose intolerance manifests as the valve to the stomach staying open, hence when people are asleep the acid travels up. Happens to me!I'm just throwing some ideas out there...best of luck to you. Keep writing to us...we care about you and support you in your process!Best wishes, I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling. Raina

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Hey . I do like to work out. I actually did turbo jam and zumba last night. I'm not really sure why I just want junk food. I just love to eat. I know there are emotional issues that I need to explore more. Sent from my iPhone

Good Luck, Raina.The process is challenging... To me, I had to do a bit of prayer work about compulsive eating...I don't want to make IE into a reason to eat emotionally or compulsively. It's working for me so far. I don't know if my weight has changed, but I find myself NOT craving junk. I don't really like dry pastries...never knew that until starting this.But, it seems that one must dig deep... What about exercise? Do you enjoy exercising for fun? Do you enjoy being strong? Do you enjoy looking at healthy foods because it's FUN to nourish yourself? Just some ideas on turning the tables around a bit. I love to exercise...but when I resisted it it was some sort of inner body fight. Now I do it more regularly than before...3-4 times a week. When I stopped "dieting", and focus on hunger (without getting obsessive about hunger vs. nonhunger) I'm more relaxed. BUT...peace of mind has happened from this process. I don't know if there is physical difference...but what's most important to me is peace of mind.The simple processes are hard...being totally brutally honest with self to the core...it's a challenge. What do you like about junk food? Why is it the only thing you want to ingest? Is it the salt? the fat? Why is it so appealing? Past diets? Have you tried eating a piece of fruit for pleasure only, just to see if you could taste some yummyness there? What healthy foods do you like? how could you gravitate towards them compassionately? I'm new to this process so if any of this is counter the IE program someone please clarify!Dairy products contribute to reflux in some people. When I have eaten dairy the reflux flares up, when I cut it out of my diet it's gone. For some people lactose intolerance manifests as the valve to the stomach staying open, hence when people are asleep the acid travels up. Happens to me!I'm just throwing some ideas out there...best of luck to you. Keep writing to us...we care about you and support you in your process!Best wishes, I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds. I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet is so hard. I just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling. Raina

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Raina,

It always hurts my heart to hear stories like yours of people continuing to gain

weight in their efforts to stop dieting and to eat intuitively. I don't believe

that IE is about weight loss, though I definitely believe that practicing IE is

one of the best methods to find balance; no weight gain and no weight loss.

I definitely concur with Christie's Honoring Your Health blog points about 3 of

the top reasons that people gain weight on their IE path: 1) A person may

interpret intuitive eating to mean " no holds barred " eating (binging) 2) A

connection with a person's true biological hunger and fullness has not been made

or 3) A person on the lower end of the weight range, may need to gain weight.

If someone who does not need to gain weight is experiencing continuous weight

gain with IE, I believe that they should seek outside assistance within the

first 1-3 months. There could be some biological or hormonal imbalance going on.

So, a consult with a MD might be in order. Most likely a connection and ability

to honor hunger signals hasn't been made and eating for emotional reasons and

compulsive eating habits continue to dominate. Who wouldn't be ready to give up

IE, if they've gone 6 months and gained weight?!

I'm 33 too. And, about 3 weeks ago, I felt like a " normal eater " for the first

time since I was 4 years old! For the most part, food is just food. I know that

practicing intuitive eating is a major reason that I've made peace with food and

my body.

A lot of people say that finding balance in your body or losing weight is about

a " lifestyle " change. I don't agree. I believe that a person's " lifestyle " is a

reflection or extension of who they are inside. So, for me finding balance and

disconnecting from an obsessive-compulsive relationship with food required that

I actually become a different person than who I had been.

I had to willingly admit, confront, and transform each one of my habits that

caused me to be a chronic and expert weight gainer for the majority of my life.

That meant learning how to " wait " for my hunger and eventually how to honor my

fullness signals. That meant ending the free pass to overeat during holidays and

vacations and at special event or office gathering, etc. That meant keeping my

body hydrated so that I wasn't turning to moist foods for my water needs.

It meant learning how to stay conscious and mindful, how not to trance out or

abandon myself through food, how to sit with my emotions, and how distract and

soothe myself with non-food self-care methods [Read When Women Stop Hating Their

Bodies]. It meant experimenting with and exploring how and when my body loves to

move and making movement a priority.

Fortunately, I have a masters degree in counseling psychology, so I could coach

and counsel myself through this journey. If I didn't have those

skills/knowledge, I would have definitely sought help with my emotional eating

and compulsive thoughts related to food. Personally, I knew that I had truly

connected with my body's needs and signals when my weight stayed level for 6

whole months at the beginning of my journey.

I have met several healthcare practitioners in my area who have reported that

many of their patients, who have undergone gastric bypass, continue to struggle

with food and have gained weight back. So, whether you continue IE or choose

another option, your weight gaining habits need to be transformed, if you want

to experience peace and balance in your body. You may benefit from a more

structured eating plan to detox from junk food in order to get your body in a

more peaceful place that allows you to connect with your hunger and fullness

signals.

My greatest wish for you, me, and everyone else is to experience ongoing peace,

balance, and love in relationship with our bodies.

Latoya

Practicing IE since January '08

>

> I have been trying IE for awhile now. In the process, I have put on 50 pounds.

I have never been this big or unhealthy in my life. I have trouble with my knees

and awful heel pain. I didn't gain this much when I went off a diet. I am so

disappointed because I thought this was the way to go. I always want junk food

and never crave any of the healthier stuff. I feel terrible. I have acid reflux

and terrible anxiety from all this weight I have put on. It is a constant

struggle for me to turn away from food. I have to fight with myself all the time

to try not to eat when I'm not hungry. To me, this seems so much like a diet. I

am only 33 years old and having all these issues. Please tell me how you all get

through this. My ankles swell really bad now and gaining all this weight has

made me really depressed. What put the icing on the cake was when I went for my

yearly physical, my doc recommended gastric bypass. IE seems so simple, but yet

is so hard. I just don't know if this is for me. Sorry for rambling.

>

> Raina

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You can say "you look great". You don't have to comment unless they tell you they have lost weight, then you say "Congratulations, good for you." I don't like comments about my weight, because if they notice when I lose, then they notice when I gain. I'd rather talk about something else.

Debbie

I feel uncomfortable right now when I notice that people have lost weight because quite simply, I don't know WHAT to say. It is really not a good feeling. Do I comment on it or not? I would love to hear how other people on this list handle that OR how they feel about it when someone comments on their weight loss. Speaking personally, Sometimes I don't have a problem with someone noticing that I have lost around 40 lbs & am probably at my "natural" weight now. Other times it does bother me a bit. I'm going to try to keep track of exactly what feelings come up when someone notices in the future.mj

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I've *always* hated it when people complimented me for losing weight. I agree

with that I find it kind of insulting, even though I know that it's not

meant that way. But it's sort of like, no one ever compliments me and tells me

I look good when I'm heavier, so why compliment me when I'm thinner? They're

basically saying that I don't look good unless I'm thinner. So, for that

reason, I never compliment people for losing weight, either. I'll compliment

their outfit or jewelry or hair, or whatever. But I never tie compliments to

weight loss.

In the past I always just brushed the comments off or changed the subject.

Oddly, these days, people ask me all the time if I'm losing weight. I haven't

lost any, at all, but I'm more toned because of the work I do with my trainer.

Sometimes, because I'm now so anti-diet, I actually find that I get cranky when

people ask. But whenever I'm asked, I try to just say " No, I haven't. " and then

talk about something else.

Josie

>

> Hi,

>

> I feel uncomfortable right now when I notice that people have lost weight

because quite simply, I don't know WHAT to say. It is really not a good feeling.

Do I comment on it or not? I would love to hear how other people on this list

handle that OR how they feel about it when someone comments on their weight

loss.

>

> Speaking personally, Sometimes I don't have a problem with someone noticing

that I have lost around 40 lbs & am probably at my " natural " weight now. Other

times it does bother me a bit. I'm going to try to keep track of exactly what

feelings come up when someone notices in the future.

>

> mj

>

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I've *always* hated it when people complimented me for losing weight. I agree

with that I find it kind of insulting, even though I know that it's not

meant that way. But it's sort of like, no one ever compliments me and tells me

I look good when I'm heavier, so why compliment me when I'm thinner? They're

basically saying that I don't look good unless I'm thinner. So, for that

reason, I never compliment people for losing weight, either. I'll compliment

their outfit or jewelry or hair, or whatever. But I never tie compliments to

weight loss.

In the past I always just brushed the comments off or changed the subject.

Oddly, these days, people ask me all the time if I'm losing weight. I haven't

lost any, at all, but I'm more toned because of the work I do with my trainer.

Sometimes, because I'm now so anti-diet, I actually find that I get cranky when

people ask. But whenever I'm asked, I try to just say " No, I haven't. " and then

talk about something else.

Josie

>

> Hi,

>

> I feel uncomfortable right now when I notice that people have lost weight

because quite simply, I don't know WHAT to say. It is really not a good feeling.

Do I comment on it or not? I would love to hear how other people on this list

handle that OR how they feel about it when someone comments on their weight

loss.

>

> Speaking personally, Sometimes I don't have a problem with someone noticing

that I have lost around 40 lbs & am probably at my " natural " weight now. Other

times it does bother me a bit. I'm going to try to keep track of exactly what

feelings come up when someone notices in the future.

>

> mj

>

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Hi,

good suggestions, I find that " it's great to see you seems to work in all

situations. " When people say that to me, I really like it because it's more

like they a happy just to see me no matter what I look like.

mj

>

> You can say " you look great " . You don't have to comment unless they tell

> you they have lost weight, then you say " Congratulations, good for you. "

> I don't like comments about my weight, because if they notice when I lose,

> then they notice when I gain. I'd rather talk about something else.

> Debbie

>

>

>

> In a message dated 9/3/2010 10:13:42 P.M. Central Daylight Time,

> imhere4u1232000@... writes:

>

> I feel uncomfortable right now when I notice that people have lost weight

> because quite simply, I don't know WHAT to say. It is really not a good

> feeling. Do I comment on it or not? I would love to hear how other people on

> this list handle that OR how they feel about it when someone comments on

> their weight loss.

>

> Speaking personally, Sometimes I don't have a problem with someone

> noticing that I have lost around 40 lbs & am probably at my " natural " weight

now.

> Other times it does bother me a bit. I'm going to try to keep track of

> exactly what feelings come up when someone notices in the future.

>

> mj

>

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Hi,

good suggestions, I find that " it's great to see you seems to work in all

situations. " When people say that to me, I really like it because it's more

like they a happy just to see me no matter what I look like.

mj

>

> You can say " you look great " . You don't have to comment unless they tell

> you they have lost weight, then you say " Congratulations, good for you. "

> I don't like comments about my weight, because if they notice when I lose,

> then they notice when I gain. I'd rather talk about something else.

> Debbie

>

>

>

> In a message dated 9/3/2010 10:13:42 P.M. Central Daylight Time,

> imhere4u1232000@... writes:

>

> I feel uncomfortable right now when I notice that people have lost weight

> because quite simply, I don't know WHAT to say. It is really not a good

> feeling. Do I comment on it or not? I would love to hear how other people on

> this list handle that OR how they feel about it when someone comments on

> their weight loss.

>

> Speaking personally, Sometimes I don't have a problem with someone

> noticing that I have lost around 40 lbs & am probably at my " natural " weight

now.

> Other times it does bother me a bit. I'm going to try to keep track of

> exactly what feelings come up when someone notices in the future.

>

> mj

>

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