Standing on my last raw nerve

[Guest guest]

I don't know why this borderline mother is really on my last nerve today. I am

not her lover...She kisses my hand and up my arm as I walk out of the room and

pretends to cry, " Oh, you're leaving me! " For God sake I'm going to the

bathroom! I told her she acts like a spurned lover if I leave to pee. She

starts laughing. But, it won't stop her!

She's senile. But, I guess the last thing to go will be this borderline

insanity! And for some reason tonight, she is on my last raw nerve! I feel

like puking! Is there something wrong with me that such little

stupid/manipulative/weird (fake loving) acts drive me insane?

And how on earth can I stop it?

[Guest guest]

I can empathize with your irritation at your bpd mother's behaviors.

I too found it highly frustrating when my nada would behave cruelly toward me,

yell and scream at me, call me names, hurt my feelings, and then act as though

nothing had happened. Sometimes she would even tease me sarcastically for

feeling hurt. I was supposed to instantly get over her raging episodes, and

even act lovingly toward her even though I was both hurt and angry.

When I had a lot of repressed rage bottled up inside that I wasn't allowed to

express, then teasing and playfulness coming from my abuser only felt like more

abuse: it felt like I was being mocked, shamed or bullied.

I agree that sometimes the best thing you can do is just leave the premises.

Put physical distance between you and your mother if she is working your last

nerve.

-Annie

>

> I don't know why this borderline mother is really on my last nerve today. I

am not her lover...She kisses my hand and up my arm as I walk out of the room

and pretends to cry, " Oh, you're leaving me! " For God sake I'm going to the

bathroom! I told her she acts like a spurned lover if I leave to pee. She

starts laughing. But, it won't stop her!

>

> She's senile. But, I guess the last thing to go will be this borderline

insanity! And for some reason tonight, she is on my last raw nerve! I feel

like puking! Is there something wrong with me that such little

stupid/manipulative/weird (fake loving) acts drive me insane?

>

> And how on earth can I stop it?

>

[Guest guest]

I can empathize with your irritation at your bpd mother's behaviors.

I too found it highly frustrating when my nada would behave cruelly toward me,

yell and scream at me, call me names, hurt my feelings, and then act as though

nothing had happened. Sometimes she would even tease me sarcastically for

feeling hurt. I was supposed to instantly get over her raging episodes, and

even act lovingly toward her even though I was both hurt and angry.

When I had a lot of repressed rage bottled up inside that I wasn't allowed to

express, then teasing and playfulness coming from my abuser only felt like more

abuse: it felt like I was being mocked, shamed or bullied.

I agree that sometimes the best thing you can do is just leave the premises.

Put physical distance between you and your mother if she is working your last

nerve.

-Annie

>

> I don't know why this borderline mother is really on my last nerve today. I

am not her lover...She kisses my hand and up my arm as I walk out of the room

and pretends to cry, " Oh, you're leaving me! " For God sake I'm going to the

bathroom! I told her she acts like a spurned lover if I leave to pee. She

starts laughing. But, it won't stop her!

>

> She's senile. But, I guess the last thing to go will be this borderline

insanity! And for some reason tonight, she is on my last raw nerve! I feel

like puking! Is there something wrong with me that such little

stupid/manipulative/weird (fake loving) acts drive me insane?

>

> And how on earth can I stop it?

>

[Guest guest]

FoC, I saw this odd behavior with my grandmother when she was in the nursing

home. She did this with my aunt who was the chosen one but pointedly not with

my mother(nada). She would want lots of physical contact with her, holding

hands, rubbing her arm, wanting lotion rubbed on her, all of which seemed really

weird especially if you saw it....writing about it now it doesn't sound so

weird, but it was I swear!

As for how you stop this behavior, I hate to say it but it's as simple (and

awful) as taking your arm back and stepping away and saying something like " Mom,

you know I like to have my space. " every time she does it. I don't know if your

nada would go batshit insane at that or not, but it seems an option.

>

> I don't know why this borderline mother is really on my last nerve today. I

am not her lover...She kisses my hand and up my arm as I walk out of the room

and pretends to cry, " Oh, you're leaving me! " For God sake I'm going to the

bathroom! I told her she acts like a spurned lover if I leave to pee. She

starts laughing. But, it won't stop her!

>

> She's senile. But, I guess the last thing to go will be this borderline

insanity! And for some reason tonight, she is on my last raw nerve! I feel

like puking! Is there something wrong with me that such little

stupid/manipulative/weird (fake loving) acts drive me insane?

>

> And how on earth can I stop it?

>