Re: Please help! Urgently need advice.

[Guest guest]

the only advice I have is to love yourself curves & all & to be proud of the

fact that you are NOT buying into that billion dollar a year diet industry that

has caused us to be at war with our bodies, to " hide " who we really are, & to

shut ourselves up in our houses with mounds of food in order to avoid people

who's judgements don't mean a damn thing. Here is the thing, I am not a good

housekeeper & my mom & sister are immaculate. I used to run around getting

everything cleaned up if I knew my mom would be dropping over, which was fairly

often since she lived right next door. THEN, one day I realized, hey Mom is

coming to see me, not my house. I relaxed & we had an awesome visit. I realized

that whatever she thought of my messy house was her business & how I lived was

mine. That one decision TRANSFORMED our entire relationship. We became relaxed

around each other & had a great time together. I think it has to do with being

'authentic' with who we are & not 'hiding' anything by 'running away' or

disguising ourselves (Geneen calls this 'bolting').

>

> Hi all,

> Hope all is well... I've been doing so well lately and really focusing on

taking care of my mind and body. I haven't binged in a while and just being a

lot more present and really settling into IE. However, I still have not lost

any weight. In fact, I think I have gained some as I've been listening to my

body and taking it easy on my workouts and doing things that I feel like doing

and not being as rigorous as before - I used to really torture myself.

> This all truly means progress in my mind, HUGE progress, but I'm supposed to

see my boyfriend's family tomorrow and I'm just feeling so self conscious all of

a sudden and feeling so embarrassed! None of my clothes are fitting and I even

went shopping today and couldn't find anything that I liked in my new size 16 -

the last time they saw me, I was a wonderful size 10. I'm supposed to drive

down there in the morning and really just want to curl up in bed and not go at

all.

> I know I'm beautiful and he loves all my curves and loves me the way I am, and

I'm hope his family will too, but I don't want them to see me when I'm feeling

so self conscious.

> I have an outfit put together, but I just don't feel good in my body right

now. PLEASE help!!!

> I'm supposed to see them again over Thanksgiving... would be such a bad idea

to cancel tomorrow and give myself another two weeks? I'm worried this pressure

is going to make me start binging again. I know its pressure that I'm putting

on myself, but I can't help it. If you have any advice, I would really really

appreciate it!!

> Thanks so much!

> Mali

>

[Guest guest]

I agree with the advice the ladies have been giving you. Don't let this derail you. Your worth is not determined by the size of your jeans. Your body has taken you this far in life and nobody has the right to disparage it or tell you that it's unacceptable. I totally understand your discomfort, though. In this culture, it is so hard to be happy with who you are, no matter what size that is. When I was a size 6, I was called fat because I had always been a size 2. My new size was unacceptable to people who had known a skinnier me, especially my parents and mother-in-law. If you let those kinds of things in, it will never end. There will always be someone with a disapproving look, no matter what size you are.

I say concentrate on feeling great about yourself, even through the doubt. Find a great outfit and keep repeating how worthy and deserving you are as a human being. Practice excellent self care and hold your head up high. You are not guilty of a crime because you are not the size that someone else thinks you should be. Confidence is half the battle. Good luck!

Mimi

Subject: Re: Please help! Urgently need advice.To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Sunday, November 7, 2010, 1:59 PM

Josie,I loved this response, especially the part about the liposuction LOL.Everything you said is so true, people generally are so focused on their own "stuff" that they don't notice our stuff at all. It was funny, Geneen is not afraid of using the **** word, she does it in her book (even though I've read some comments from people who really didn't like it) & she did it in the workshop when talking about what to say to the "voice" when it is being negative. She said some people may just plain have to tell the voice to ==== off!!!!!And she kinda did a little voice scream up there. It was actually really funny. I thought it was very brave of her to do that in front of over 800 women, not caring how they perceived it.I found her to be really entertaining. Would love to go again.mj> >> > Hi all,> > Hope all is well... I've been doing so well lately and really focusing on taking care of my mind and body. I haven't binged in a while and just being a lot more present and really settling into IE. However, I still have not lost any weight. In fact, I think I have gained some as I've been listening to my body and taking it easy on my workouts and doing things that I feel like doing and not being as rigorous as before - I used to really torture myself.> > This all truly means progress in my mind, HUGE progress, but I'm supposed to see my boyfriend's family tomorrow and I'm just feeling so self conscious all of a sudden and feeling so

embarrassed! None of my clothes are fitting and I even went shopping today and couldn't find anything that I liked in my new size 16 - the last time they saw me, I was a wonderful size 10. I'm supposed to drive down there in the morning and really just want to curl up in bed and not go at all. > > I know I'm beautiful and he loves all my curves and loves me the way I am, and I'm hope his family will too, but I don't want them to see me when I'm feeling so self conscious. > > I have an outfit put together, but I just don't feel good in my body right now. PLEASE help!!!> > I'm supposed to see them again over Thanksgiving... would be such a bad idea to cancel tomorrow and give myself another two weeks? I'm worried this pressure is going to make me start binging again. I know its pressure that I'm putting on myself, but I can't help it. If you have any advice, I would really really appreciate it!!> > Thanks so

much!> > Mali> >>

[Guest guest]

I agree with the advice the ladies have been giving you. Don't let this derail you. Your worth is not determined by the size of your jeans. Your body has taken you this far in life and nobody has the right to disparage it or tell you that it's unacceptable. I totally understand your discomfort, though. In this culture, it is so hard to be happy with who you are, no matter what size that is. When I was a size 6, I was called fat because I had always been a size 2. My new size was unacceptable to people who had known a skinnier me, especially my parents and mother-in-law. If you let those kinds of things in, it will never end. There will always be someone with a disapproving look, no matter what size you are.

I say concentrate on feeling great about yourself, even through the doubt. Find a great outfit and keep repeating how worthy and deserving you are as a human being. Practice excellent self care and hold your head up high. You are not guilty of a crime because you are not the size that someone else thinks you should be. Confidence is half the battle. Good luck!

Mimi

Subject: Re: Please help! Urgently need advice.To: IntuitiveEating_Support Date: Sunday, November 7, 2010, 1:59 PM

Josie,I loved this response, especially the part about the liposuction LOL.Everything you said is so true, people generally are so focused on their own "stuff" that they don't notice our stuff at all. It was funny, Geneen is not afraid of using the **** word, she does it in her book (even though I've read some comments from people who really didn't like it) & she did it in the workshop when talking about what to say to the "voice" when it is being negative. She said some people may just plain have to tell the voice to ==== off!!!!!And she kinda did a little voice scream up there. It was actually really funny. I thought it was very brave of her to do that in front of over 800 women, not caring how they perceived it.I found her to be really entertaining. Would love to go again.mj> >> > Hi all,> > Hope all is well... I've been doing so well lately and really focusing on taking care of my mind and body. I haven't binged in a while and just being a lot more present and really settling into IE. However, I still have not lost any weight. In fact, I think I have gained some as I've been listening to my body and taking it easy on my workouts and doing things that I feel like doing and not being as rigorous as before - I used to really torture myself.> > This all truly means progress in my mind, HUGE progress, but I'm supposed to see my boyfriend's family tomorrow and I'm just feeling so self conscious all of a sudden and feeling so

embarrassed! None of my clothes are fitting and I even went shopping today and couldn't find anything that I liked in my new size 16 - the last time they saw me, I was a wonderful size 10. I'm supposed to drive down there in the morning and really just want to curl up in bed and not go at all. > > I know I'm beautiful and he loves all my curves and loves me the way I am, and I'm hope his family will too, but I don't want them to see me when I'm feeling so self conscious. > > I have an outfit put together, but I just don't feel good in my body right now. PLEASE help!!!> > I'm supposed to see them again over Thanksgiving... would be such a bad idea to cancel tomorrow and give myself another two weeks? I'm worried this pressure is going to make me start binging again. I know its pressure that I'm putting on myself, but I can't help it. If you have any advice, I would really really appreciate it!!> > Thanks so

much!> > Mali> >>