Can a BPD be married to a BPD?

[Guest guest]

My father, who I beleive had a mother with BPD, subsequently married my mother

with BPD (and paranoid schitzophrenia), then ran screaming from that, leaving me

with her at the age of 4, only to marry another one, more devious, less violent

when I was a teenager.

I've always viewed him as a Dishrag dad (ok, since I found this site) but now he

appears to be " hoovering " me back into a dysfunctional situation with him and

his wife.

I've been LC since Novemberish, and they've been sending my kids birthday

presents etc.

For my eldest daughters birthday, I sent pictures & a thank you. Got no

response.

For my eldest daughters piano recital, I sent pictures and video. Got no

response (you'd think that a proud grandpa would be eager to call and

congradulate her!).

For my youngest daughters birthday, I sent nothing. I thought EFF you if you

want to be like that.

I got a snotty e-mail that basically said " its been thirty days since her

birthday and I haven't heard if she likes her present " .

I know that it doesn't look like much, but there was an underlying current in

the email that set me off.

My gut response is to get nasty of course. I felt the anxiety, heart racing,

fear, desire for acceptance etc. My husband talked me down from sending the

nasty e-mail that I had written. Instead, i wrote that I had put it away to be

worn on special occasions. He responds that it's for daily wear.

Get this - he sends a 4 year old a pretty pendant and expects her to wear it

daily. Um, NO. She's FOUR!! She puts teeth marks on DVD's. SHE'S FOUR!!!

She's far more destructive than her older sister, she's clumsier, she's more

adventurous....I recently had her at the ER for falling down the stairs and

breaking her nose. She's a klutz! She'd likely strangle herself with it, or

she'd take it off and use it as a slingshot, try to feed it down the heat

registers, use it as a weapon against her sister!

Anyway, venting here, but what i want to know is, is it possible for two BPD's

to be married to one another?

My husband beleives that he's just being fed the BS from the step nada monster,

has no real sense of self and is just regurgitating what she is saying.