Re: Depression, where the hell did this come from

[Guest guest]

Ugh - yeah, me too. I usually get the seasonal affective depression in winter

and I have learned to manage it but this year, despite essentially removing nada

from my life for the last 6 years, I have found myself pretty severely depressed

in the middle of summer.

I think, after removing the nada crap, we are left with ourselves. And we were

raised to be whatever our nadas needed, not pay attention to our

needs/desires/dreams. I have a really hard time taking care of myself because

to have a problem around nada and actually tell someone, just caused more nada

drama problems. So I learned to shut up and put up. I have to learn how to do

what nada didn't do for me as a child and I have no idea how to do that now as

an adult.

This part seems to make setting boundaries with nada easy. I didn't think I

would ever say that. I always had visions of my life through college and

getting my own apartment but my dreams went blank after that. Were those really

just nada's visions and mine were never created?

So here is my selfcare list. I am going to pledge to:

Find a therapist

See the doctor for the foot issues I have had for almost 3 years now.

Find a way to get myself a pair of skates that fit properly so I can do the

activity/exercise I love.

I could list a lot more but those are at the top of my list for now.

Thanks for sharing Doug. It is so nice to know I am not alone in this journey.

I wish you speed and insight in figuring this out and your are able to get

happier.

peace,

patinage