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Re: First Birthday NC

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RE: Save our allowances - Yeah, we got that from her, through our dad (she'd

tell him and he'd tell us). But she was well known for cancelling Christmas,

etc when she felt we'd been out of line. Consequently, my family doesn't

celebrate the holidays and it's depressing to one extent, and uncomfortable in

another: I didn't understand how to celebrate when I spent my first Xmas at the

Fiancé's family's place.

>

> Birthdays and holidays are very stressful for me.

>

> I'm LC right now, and it was sooo tough to get through my birthday---which I

did NOT want to celebrate with Nada, which hurt her feelings terribly---and it

was equally as tough to get through this last Mother's Day, since, for the first

time ever, I didn't acknowledge it at all where she was concerned. No call. No

gift. No Mother's Day dinner at Red Lobster. :)

>

> Holidays and birthdays are a big deal for my Nada. She overblows and expects

so much out of these occasions that it just becomes uncomfortable for everyone,

since we're all walking on eggshells afraid that she'll be disapointed. (I was

the worst, though; as the oldest child, I always felt as though her happiness

was *my* responsibility.)

>

> Coming next is her birthday. She's always expected lots of presents and

attention and it's going to make me feel extremely guilty, but I don't want to

spend it with her.

>

> It makes me laugh now: when my brother and I were little, she would warn us

when Mother's Day or her birthday were coming up and she'd remind us that we

needed to save our allowances to buy her a gift. I would *never* say anything

like that to my kid.

>

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