Re: Chapter 5: Principle 1: Reject the Diet Mentality

[Guest guest]

After rereading Chapter 5 yesterday, I am feeling pretty good about where I am

in rejecting the diet mentality. I think this is one of the things I've worked

on since October when I first read about IE. The first few months, there was a

part of me that kept wanting to try one last diet, or to make IE into a diet by

being strict about it. I think November sometime, I decided that I was going to

try for three weeks to eat only when hungry and stop when full, with the express

intent of trying to lose some weight. That backfired after about three days if I

remember correctly.

So since then, I've been trying to relax and to not diet or pseudo-diet. It

definitely takes a bit of mental nudging to get myself not to count calories

sometimes. It is just something I do from years of trying to restrict my food by

counting calories. When it comes on, the best I can do is to try very hard to

think of something else and not focus on adding calories up.

Lately, I've also been questioning how useful it is to weigh myself. I find it

interesting that they make a point of talking about this issue in the chapter. I

have definitely cut back on weighing myself; especially recently I've been

trying to do it only every few weeks. But more and more, I feel like there's no

real point to it, except for me to go through some whole routine of feeling

elated or let down by the number. I was talking to my mother the other night

about this, and she was saying how she thought it was important to look at the

scale for health reasons. But that doesn't really make too much sense to me,

because I don't need a scale to tell me if I've lost or gained weight for the

most part. I can tell by how I feel physically or by how much I've been eating.

And I don't know what else the scale would tell me about my health besides what

my weight is. And there is a lot to know about my health besides my weight, like

I work out, I try to eat healthy foods, I care for my body. I am thinking

recently that I should just forgo the scale altogether.

The other part of the chapter that really stood out to me upon rereading it was

the bit about paradigm shifts in the section on how to reject the diet

mentality:

" A paradigm is a model or frame of reference by which we perceive and

understand the world. In the world of weight management, dieting is the cultural

paradigm by which we attempt to control our weight. A paradigm shift is a break

with tradition, with old ways of thinking, with old paradigms. We must change

our paradigm to reject dieting; only then can we build a healthy relationship

with food and our bodies. "

I really related with this quotation. I think that for real change to occur, on

a personal or societal level, change in how people view the world, how they talk

about it, has to occur. In terms of dieting/weight management/food issues, I

have definitely found that when I have experienced change in objective outer

levels, what really precipitated it was a change in how I viewed the issue at

hand. When I was in high school, I prescribed to the idea that I had to eat very

little food to lose weight and restrict myself, and I struggled greatly with my

weight and never lost anything for good. By the time I got to college, however,

I was willing to consider new ideas like exercising whether or not I was on a

diet or starting to eat a bigger variety and reasonable amount of food. I think

it was those things that ultimately helped me to lose weight.

After my successful college diet, I think I always felt that I had figured out

part of the puzzle but there was still something else I needed to work on. I had

pinpointed that something as becoming more athletic or ramping up the exercise

program to lose weight, but now I think what I need to feel at peace with my

weight is to recognize that I can feel this way starting today, no matter what

weight I'm at, and to learn to respond to my body's signals about what I should

eat.

So those are my thoughts on Chapter 5.

Thanks!

Meg

>

> I'm a couple days delayed here...just because I've been dozing on the

> couch at night and don't get to my responses in time. Boo hiss!!!

>

> This chapter is complex and it's hard to identify questions for each

> individual since we are all at such a different place. Please read

> the chapter, look at the " how-to " steps, identify where you still

> might be passively dieting, and look at the chart towards the end of

> the chapter.

>

> In other words...please feel free to share where you are in your

> journey with Principle 1, how you feel about it, and what strategies

> you're employing to fully reject the diet mentality.

>

> Go forth and comment!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I'm behind in the discussion, but do find these valuable (thanks, Jules!), so wanted to talk a little about my ability (or not) to reject the diet mentality.

I'd say maybe I'm halfway there. I'm totally convinced that dieting backfires always and is damaging, but I still feel the allure of dieting as a way to lose weight, which is still a goal for me, even though I basically think I've probably lost all the weight I can keep off (30 lbs recently with WW), despite still being way over a healthy weight.

I do miss diet bonding: Most of my friends still diet, and I feel like I have to just keep quiet when they talk about it, because I've already explained IE to them, but they all seem unconvinced and I have no interest in recruiting. Since they are all heavily into diet mentality, they talk about it a lot (I used to, too), so it's a little awkward for me and sometimes is a setback for me. I can start thinking I "ought to" be doing what they're doing.

And so I flirt from time to time with the "one more diet" trap--I keep thinking "if I could just lose 30 more pounds . . ." But then I remember all the times that has failed, and the dread I felt every time I stepped on the scale and saw the same old number or a higher one, I shrink back.

I sometimes wonder if my concentration on healthy foods isn't pseudo dieting, but for the most part I really don't like "junk food" and that's the reason I don't eat it, not that it will make me gain weight.

I used to restrict carbs, and I'm sure making up for that now! I find I want carbs at nearly every meal, and feel physically better for eating this way, but I sometimes flinch at how many carbs I'm eating. I keep telling myself that if I'm hungry for these, my body must need them.

I think I still have lingering feelings that I am a failure. It galls me that I've been able to accomplish so much else in my life--loving husband and great home life, earned a PhD and have a mostly cushy job that lets me work from home, financial security, lots of other blessings--and still I'm so fat. I'm working on building my self esteem in this area, by stopping The Voice (as Roth calls it) and being kinder to myself.

Dieter's tools:

Scale: I've stopped weighing except maybe once a month, and I'm holding my previous weight loss, but I find that depressing. I'm toying with putting the scale away. Diet books: I've weeded out and donated the worst ones. Ones with recipes I enjoy, I've kept. I also kept Dr. Oz's "You on a Diet" because I respect him and his work, even though I've never cracked open the book. I plan a second purge of diet books in a few months. Dr. Oz may get the toss at that time.

Exercise: I've stopped punishing myself with over-exercising (and injury!) and instead am regularly walking with my husband and a friend, and also have just started Nia (thanks to Joy Tanksley for recommending this joyful exercise on her blog!), which I really love. I want to get into a more regular system of exercising; I still let stress shut down my resolve, when in fact the exercise, if done regularly and moderately, would, I know, lessen stress. It's a revelation to me that exercise can be enjoyable, now that I'm not overdoing it.

Thanks for giving us this opportunity to review the book, !

Laurie

Chapter 5: Principle 1: Reject the Diet Mentality

I'm a couple days delayed here...just because I've been dozing on the

couch at night and don't get to my responses in time. Boo hiss!!!

This chapter is complex and it's hard to identify questions for each

individual since we are all at such a different place. Please read

the chapter, look at the "how-to" steps, identify where you still

might be passively dieting, and look at the chart towards the end of

the chapter.

In other words...please feel free to share where you are in your

journey with Principle 1, how you feel about it, and what strategies

you're employing to fully reject the diet mentality.

Go forth and comment!

[Guest guest]

I'm behind in the discussion, but do find these valuable (thanks, Jules!), so wanted to talk a little about my ability (or not) to reject the diet mentality.

I'd say maybe I'm halfway there. I'm totally convinced that dieting backfires always and is damaging, but I still feel the allure of dieting as a way to lose weight, which is still a goal for me, even though I basically think I've probably lost all the weight I can keep off (30 lbs recently with WW), despite still being way over a healthy weight.

I do miss diet bonding: Most of my friends still diet, and I feel like I have to just keep quiet when they talk about it, because I've already explained IE to them, but they all seem unconvinced and I have no interest in recruiting. Since they are all heavily into diet mentality, they talk about it a lot (I used to, too), so it's a little awkward for me and sometimes is a setback for me. I can start thinking I "ought to" be doing what they're doing.

And so I flirt from time to time with the "one more diet" trap--I keep thinking "if I could just lose 30 more pounds . . ." But then I remember all the times that has failed, and the dread I felt every time I stepped on the scale and saw the same old number or a higher one, I shrink back.

I sometimes wonder if my concentration on healthy foods isn't pseudo dieting, but for the most part I really don't like "junk food" and that's the reason I don't eat it, not that it will make me gain weight.

I used to restrict carbs, and I'm sure making up for that now! I find I want carbs at nearly every meal, and feel physically better for eating this way, but I sometimes flinch at how many carbs I'm eating. I keep telling myself that if I'm hungry for these, my body must need them.

I think I still have lingering feelings that I am a failure. It galls me that I've been able to accomplish so much else in my life--loving husband and great home life, earned a PhD and have a mostly cushy job that lets me work from home, financial security, lots of other blessings--and still I'm so fat. I'm working on building my self esteem in this area, by stopping The Voice (as Roth calls it) and being kinder to myself.

Dieter's tools:

Scale: I've stopped weighing except maybe once a month, and I'm holding my previous weight loss, but I find that depressing. I'm toying with putting the scale away. Diet books: I've weeded out and donated the worst ones. Ones with recipes I enjoy, I've kept. I also kept Dr. Oz's "You on a Diet" because I respect him and his work, even though I've never cracked open the book. I plan a second purge of diet books in a few months. Dr. Oz may get the toss at that time.

Exercise: I've stopped punishing myself with over-exercising (and injury!) and instead am regularly walking with my husband and a friend, and also have just started Nia (thanks to Joy Tanksley for recommending this joyful exercise on her blog!), which I really love. I want to get into a more regular system of exercising; I still let stress shut down my resolve, when in fact the exercise, if done regularly and moderately, would, I know, lessen stress. It's a revelation to me that exercise can be enjoyable, now that I'm not overdoing it.

Thanks for giving us this opportunity to review the book, !

Laurie

Chapter 5: Principle 1: Reject the Diet Mentality

I'm a couple days delayed here...just because I've been dozing on the

couch at night and don't get to my responses in time. Boo hiss!!!

This chapter is complex and it's hard to identify questions for each

individual since we are all at such a different place. Please read

the chapter, look at the "how-to" steps, identify where you still

might be passively dieting, and look at the chart towards the end of

the chapter.

In other words...please feel free to share where you are in your

journey with Principle 1, how you feel about it, and what strategies

you're employing to fully reject the diet mentality.

Go forth and comment!

[Guest guest]

I'm behind in the discussion, but do find these valuable (thanks, Jules!), so wanted to talk a little about my ability (or not) to reject the diet mentality.

I'd say maybe I'm halfway there. I'm totally convinced that dieting backfires always and is damaging, but I still feel the allure of dieting as a way to lose weight, which is still a goal for me, even though I basically think I've probably lost all the weight I can keep off (30 lbs recently with WW), despite still being way over a healthy weight.

I do miss diet bonding: Most of my friends still diet, and I feel like I have to just keep quiet when they talk about it, because I've already explained IE to them, but they all seem unconvinced and I have no interest in recruiting. Since they are all heavily into diet mentality, they talk about it a lot (I used to, too), so it's a little awkward for me and sometimes is a setback for me. I can start thinking I "ought to" be doing what they're doing.

And so I flirt from time to time with the "one more diet" trap--I keep thinking "if I could just lose 30 more pounds . . ." But then I remember all the times that has failed, and the dread I felt every time I stepped on the scale and saw the same old number or a higher one, I shrink back.

I sometimes wonder if my concentration on healthy foods isn't pseudo dieting, but for the most part I really don't like "junk food" and that's the reason I don't eat it, not that it will make me gain weight.

I used to restrict carbs, and I'm sure making up for that now! I find I want carbs at nearly every meal, and feel physically better for eating this way, but I sometimes flinch at how many carbs I'm eating. I keep telling myself that if I'm hungry for these, my body must need them.

I think I still have lingering feelings that I am a failure. It galls me that I've been able to accomplish so much else in my life--loving husband and great home life, earned a PhD and have a mostly cushy job that lets me work from home, financial security, lots of other blessings--and still I'm so fat. I'm working on building my self esteem in this area, by stopping The Voice (as Roth calls it) and being kinder to myself.

Dieter's tools:

Scale: I've stopped weighing except maybe once a month, and I'm holding my previous weight loss, but I find that depressing. I'm toying with putting the scale away. Diet books: I've weeded out and donated the worst ones. Ones with recipes I enjoy, I've kept. I also kept Dr. Oz's "You on a Diet" because I respect him and his work, even though I've never cracked open the book. I plan a second purge of diet books in a few months. Dr. Oz may get the toss at that time.

Exercise: I've stopped punishing myself with over-exercising (and injury!) and instead am regularly walking with my husband and a friend, and also have just started Nia (thanks to Joy Tanksley for recommending this joyful exercise on her blog!), which I really love. I want to get into a more regular system of exercising; I still let stress shut down my resolve, when in fact the exercise, if done regularly and moderately, would, I know, lessen stress. It's a revelation to me that exercise can be enjoyable, now that I'm not overdoing it.

Thanks for giving us this opportunity to review the book, !

Laurie

Chapter 5: Principle 1: Reject the Diet Mentality

I'm a couple days delayed here...just because I've been dozing on the

couch at night and don't get to my responses in time. Boo hiss!!!

This chapter is complex and it's hard to identify questions for each

individual since we are all at such a different place. Please read

the chapter, look at the "how-to" steps, identify where you still

might be passively dieting, and look at the chart towards the end of

the chapter.

In other words...please feel free to share where you are in your

journey with Principle 1, how you feel about it, and what strategies

you're employing to fully reject the diet mentality.

Go forth and comment!