Guest guest Posted August 5, 2010 Report Share Posted August 5, 2010 I loved this post- thank you!! My dad is the same way as your husband when it comes to food - pretty much exactly as you described. Now, my dad has other vices (such as cigarettes), but his thoughts and feelings (or lack thereof?) about food are very healthy and aligned with IE. I've noticed that the less I worry about my body size and food, the more easygoing I am (before my body and food issues, I didn't plan meals at specific restaurants or really mind where I ate when in a group. I just went with the flow, knowing that there'd be something I'd like on the menu.) I, too, think it's possible to tone the food obsession waaaay down, if not eliminate its emotional pull altogether. > Hi, , > > I wish I knew with 100 percent surety the answer to why he doesn't crave certain foods, but I suspect it's because he eats whatever he wants, and he also does NOT assign any other value to food beyond it tasting good and staving off hunger. If something is never " off limits " it doesn't have that sheen of the forbidden, the longed-for, un-haveable thing that you crave, I guess. When I asked him why he didn't crave certain foods, he shrugged his shoulders and said, " I don't know. I just don't. " > > And now that I think of it, I've never heard him say, " I really could go for ______. " He never is the one who drags us to a particular restaurant for a particular dish. Sure, sometimes when I say, " How about we go to Jin Ju? " he'll say, " Oh, that would be good! " but he doesn't think about food at all except when he's hungry, he says. And when I offer something up as a possibility for lunch or dinner, he never says " No, I want ____ instead. " He always says, " That sounds fine " or " Sure, that would be good. " As if it really didn't matter much at all what he ate, just so long as he ate something. > > Did you hear that? Is there such a world? I want in. > > He eats basically the same breakfast, with minor variations, every morning: cereal with lots of fruit and sometimes some other carby thing like an English muffin, scone, or piece of toast, usually with butter and/or jam; every once in awhile he'll have an egg or some bacon. He's not much into protein in the morning, and after starting to eat this way myself, I think I know why: If I eat protein in the morning, I'm not hungry enough to eat lunch. The IE book has stuff in it near the end, in the nutrition chapter, about planning the staying power of food to fit your schedule and preferences. Well, if I want to eat lunch (and I do--it's a nice break from work), I need to stick with carbs and fruit in the morning. And if I want to eat breakfast each morning (and I do--it feels nurturing to me now, though before IE I *never* ate breakfast), I need to make sure I don't eat too much protein or fat at dinner, and that I eat a " lighter " protein like fish or white-meat chicken. > > He likes certain foods better than others, but he's not a fiend about food like I have been. Occasionally he will say, " I'm not really hungry anymore, but I'm going to get a little more anyway because it tastes so good " but that is a rare occasion. > > This really is mind-blowing for me. No cravings. Not even thinking about food. Yeah, occasionally overeating, but it's not the norm. And I do think it is possible for all of us. > > And here's another thing: All those digestive problems I used to have? Pretty much gone. I think they were simply from overeating, not so much from food sensitivities as I always thought. Beef still is hard for me to digest, but other than that: gonzo. > > Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 10, 2010 Report Share Posted August 10, 2010 Laurie, Thank you so much for this post! It was a complete " light bulb " moment for me as well! As a personal trainer - I hear women all the time say how they kill themselves to lose just 5 pounds, & then their husbands will literally lose 5 or 10 lbs " by accident " or " by not even trying. " All of my female clients & I talk about food all day (particulary in our sessions - probably not good on my part!) & we all say the same thing - that our husbands could care less about what they eat. They never dream about ice cream or dessert, or look forward to each meal throughout the day like we do. A lot of the husbands I've encountered can even work all day and " forget " to eat. I always ask the question to my husband, " HOW CAN YOU FORGET TO EAT??? " It is the hightlight of my day! This post was very enlightening - it really struck a chord with me on learning how to get rid of the " forbidden " foods or the " I shouldn't eat that " mentality. As a personal trainer - it's been a struggle - but mentally I'd love to learn to be a PERMANENT IE & have that wonderful freedom that most men do! Thanks so much for the post! - Jill : ) > > > > > > Hi, group! > > > > So as I said, since doing IE, I've started asking my husband questions about eating because he's never dieted and never been overweight (that alone should be a light-bulb moment--and here I used to think he was " just lucky " ). Last night it suddenly occurred to me to ask him about cravings. > > > > Are you ready for this? He doesn't crave particular foods. He told me, " I enjoy what I eat, but I don't ever crave anything in particular. " I kept asking him, " Really? Really???? " and he would think (he's a very thoughtful guy), say " no, " and I was still just totally amazed. Then I remembered how hard it sometimes is for us to decide where we're going to eat when we eat out, or when I ask him what he's in the mood for if I'm cooking, he's never any help. I was always confused about this...What? He doesn't know what he wants to eat? Nope, never does. He regularly says " yes " to the first thing I offer up as an option, which I used to find so frustrating! Now I know why he does this. > > > > Can you imagine? A life without cravings? That's so inspiring to me. I've definitely noticed that my cravings are disappearing. I keep confusing this disappearance for " not being hungry, " but in fact I do get hungry, just not for anything in particular. What liberation! > > > > Laurie > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 10, 2010 Report Share Posted August 10, 2010 Laurie, Thank you so much for this post! It was a complete " light bulb " moment for me as well! As a personal trainer - I hear women all the time say how they kill themselves to lose just 5 pounds, & then their husbands will literally lose 5 or 10 lbs " by accident " or " by not even trying. " All of my female clients & I talk about food all day (particulary in our sessions - probably not good on my part!) & we all say the same thing - that our husbands could care less about what they eat. They never dream about ice cream or dessert, or look forward to each meal throughout the day like we do. A lot of the husbands I've encountered can even work all day and " forget " to eat. I always ask the question to my husband, " HOW CAN YOU FORGET TO EAT??? " It is the hightlight of my day! This post was very enlightening - it really struck a chord with me on learning how to get rid of the " forbidden " foods or the " I shouldn't eat that " mentality. As a personal trainer - it's been a struggle - but mentally I'd love to learn to be a PERMANENT IE & have that wonderful freedom that most men do! Thanks so much for the post! - Jill : ) > > > > > > Hi, group! > > > > So as I said, since doing IE, I've started asking my husband questions about eating because he's never dieted and never been overweight (that alone should be a light-bulb moment--and here I used to think he was " just lucky " ). Last night it suddenly occurred to me to ask him about cravings. > > > > Are you ready for this? He doesn't crave particular foods. He told me, " I enjoy what I eat, but I don't ever crave anything in particular. " I kept asking him, " Really? Really???? " and he would think (he's a very thoughtful guy), say " no, " and I was still just totally amazed. Then I remembered how hard it sometimes is for us to decide where we're going to eat when we eat out, or when I ask him what he's in the mood for if I'm cooking, he's never any help. I was always confused about this...What? He doesn't know what he wants to eat? Nope, never does. He regularly says " yes " to the first thing I offer up as an option, which I used to find so frustrating! Now I know why he does this. > > > > Can you imagine? A life without cravings? That's so inspiring to me. I've definitely noticed that my cravings are disappearing. I keep confusing this disappearance for " not being hungry, " but in fact I do get hungry, just not for anything in particular. What liberation! > > > > Laurie > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 10, 2010 Report Share Posted August 10, 2010 Laurie, Thank you so much for this post! It was a complete " light bulb " moment for me as well! As a personal trainer - I hear women all the time say how they kill themselves to lose just 5 pounds, & then their husbands will literally lose 5 or 10 lbs " by accident " or " by not even trying. " All of my female clients & I talk about food all day (particulary in our sessions - probably not good on my part!) & we all say the same thing - that our husbands could care less about what they eat. They never dream about ice cream or dessert, or look forward to each meal throughout the day like we do. A lot of the husbands I've encountered can even work all day and " forget " to eat. I always ask the question to my husband, " HOW CAN YOU FORGET TO EAT??? " It is the hightlight of my day! This post was very enlightening - it really struck a chord with me on learning how to get rid of the " forbidden " foods or the " I shouldn't eat that " mentality. As a personal trainer - it's been a struggle - but mentally I'd love to learn to be a PERMANENT IE & have that wonderful freedom that most men do! Thanks so much for the post! - Jill : ) > > > > > > Hi, group! > > > > So as I said, since doing IE, I've started asking my husband questions about eating because he's never dieted and never been overweight (that alone should be a light-bulb moment--and here I used to think he was " just lucky " ). Last night it suddenly occurred to me to ask him about cravings. > > > > Are you ready for this? He doesn't crave particular foods. He told me, " I enjoy what I eat, but I don't ever crave anything in particular. " I kept asking him, " Really? Really???? " and he would think (he's a very thoughtful guy), say " no, " and I was still just totally amazed. Then I remembered how hard it sometimes is for us to decide where we're going to eat when we eat out, or when I ask him what he's in the mood for if I'm cooking, he's never any help. I was always confused about this...What? He doesn't know what he wants to eat? Nope, never does. He regularly says " yes " to the first thing I offer up as an option, which I used to find so frustrating! Now I know why he does this. > > > > Can you imagine? A life without cravings? That's so inspiring to me. I've definitely noticed that my cravings are disappearing. I keep confusing this disappearance for " not being hungry, " but in fact I do get hungry, just not for anything in particular. What liberation! > > > > Laurie > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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