Re: Birthday party

[Guest guest]

- by now, the party's either in full swing or it's already over, so

this is not useful for THIS year - but for next year, you can recruit your

husband or some other dads, explain the situation to them, and ask them to act

as " Nada bouncers " if she shows up.

Even easier - don't have the party anyplace where she can find it. Public park

playgrounds and picnic shelters are great places for birthday parties, as are

bowling alleys, ChuckECheese, and mid-day kiddie movie matinees. You just have

to limit the guest list to those who don't know Nada, or those you can trust not

to tell her where the party is.

Also - especially in the early years (birth to say, age 5) - kids are just as

happy to go ride a pony or a carousel with Mom and Dad as they are to have a

big, crowded party. Once your daughter enters school you may be able to have

parties in her class, or pass out the invitations at school so Nada doesn't

automatically find out what you're doing.

Alternatively, you can make the party abhorrent to Nada. One of the happiest

birthday parties I ever saw was a campout in Nova Scotia - the birthday girl

(about 9 or 10 years old, I'd guess) wanted to go camping, so her parents

borrowed a huge family-size tent, invited about 8 of her friends, made a

mountain of pancakes for supper (her favorite food - I think they stuck a candle

in one of the pancakes for her), and then they all stayed up and watched a lunar

eclipse before crawling into their sleeping bags. We were camped in the next

site, and I was impressed by how much fun the kids had at this low-key party.

Another great one was a Pirate Party for a bunch of (mostly boy) kindergartners

at a public playground - they all dressed up as pirates and wore themselves out

screaming " Arrgh " and having swordfights with foam swimming noodles for two

hours, then ate peanut butter sandwiches and cake. I can't see most of our

high-maintenance Nadas hanging around for that, either.

So maybe the theme for next year's party is " where would Nada not be caught

dead? "

I hope this one went well! -

>

> >

> >

> > Hello,

> >

> > I am panicking and probably need talked some sense into. Tomorrow is my DDs

> > birthday as well as her party. I have an increasing feeling of

> > dread/anxiety that nada will show up sometime tomorrow. Her behavior always

> > gets more out of control around birthdays/holidays. She is also already out

> > of control due to the boundaries and NC. I am well prepared to ask her to

> > leave and call the police. I fear still that she will do something

> > outrageous. I am also afraid that if she pulls the crying or being calm at

> > first stuff that I am going to have an argument with others at the party

> > telling me to let her stay. Nada truly feels that she has a right to " her

> > grandbabies " as she calls them and therefore has rights to

> > birthdays/holidays. Hubby thinks that since she mailed the card that is a

> > good indication she will not show and he may be right but I am still

> > terrified.

> >

> >

> >

> >