The most loving thing....

[Guest guest]

The most loving thing that I could possibly do for any of you is what

someone once did for me.

When I was a single mom, and living in Phoenix, AZ, I had a full time

job at a bank, and my son who was still a baby, went to day care. I

was all alone in Phoenix; no family, no parents. They were still

living in the MidWest, but I had decided that I needed to strike out

on my own and be responsible for myself and my son. I always wanted

to move away from home, so I did.

I got a job in a bank as a teller. I made barely enough money for my

son and I to survive. I had never received a dime in child support;

the father was a deadbeat. I remember that I had to think twice to

spend 75 cents at Mc's to buy my son a milkshake. We lived

paycheck to paycheck, with almost all of my money going to rent, food,

and utility bills. Help with daycare was provided by the state. I was

frugal and lived very, very simply.

Month after month after month I went through the motions of this

routine. Waking up, dropping off my son to day care, going to work,

coming home, eating and going to sleep. Wake up and do it again. One

day I started asking myself, " Is this all there is to life? There's

got to be more than this! It's meaningless! "

A man at the bank had forgotten his driver's license at the teller

drive up window. I had been watching for him for a number of days and

finally after a few weeks, he showed up again. I waved his driver's

license at him and said, " I've been looking for you! " He didn't even

know it had been missing. We talked a little and then he invited me

to his church. I was leary--it was a huge Baptist church on the

corner of Bethany Home and Central....a church that caused traffic

cops to have to direct the cars on Sunday mornings because there were

so many. I was nervous, but something told me to go....and he seemed

like a trustworthy guy.

That Sunday morning I went and met this guy in the church and we sat

together. As the preacher spoke, my heart started pounding. I had

NEVER heard the message of the love of Jesus spoken in this way

before. I was on the edge of my seat as he spoke from the gospel of

...a message of incredible love that I hadn't realized was there

for me. I had wanted to feel loved....and here it was, with such a

simple message of accepting it.

Accepting Jesus was the most profound event of my life. I can't go

into all the details of that night, but I was alone in my bed when

through my tears, Jesus washed me clean, filled me with joy and made

me new. I had never had such a moving experience.

The next day at work my co-workers said things like, " What's happened

to you? You're glowing! " and " There's something different about you

today! You look so happy! " I can't explain it any other way than to

say God's love is real, and I had made Him my Lord. I was new, in

Christ.

That man disappeared from my life as quickly as he came into it. I

have no idea where that man is today. But I do know this...he gave me

the gift of life that has become the most precious gift I ever

received, and my most treasured possession. Eternal life through Christ.

That was years before I got breast implants, and I had so much to

learn. God has been at work in my life ever since that day, including

the day I got sick. God used that experience to draw me even closer,

realizing that what I believed about Him was naive. God showed me

that my beliefs were not based on fact. Here is what I believed:

" God wouldn't let me suffer like this, because He loves me too

much...because I believe Jesus died for me, I'm His child and He's

going to take care of me! "

Here's what God's truth was for me: " Yes, I love you so much that I

had to get your attention--you are trusting that breast implants have

made you whole, when in fact, only I can make you whole! " I had to

learn that " The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man

looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart. " (I

16:7) What a wake up call that whole thing was!

After my explant consultation, as I was driving home from the

appointment, sobbing tears of remorse for what I had done, God gently

calmed me with these words in my heart, 'I will heal you. Be

faithful. " God has healed me. He has been faithful. I have never

been happier or more fulfilled in my life than now.

Ladies, the most loving thing I can do for you is to share that faith,

the way that man shared his faith with me and trust that God will take

it from there. I started this group so that we could explore the ways

of healing that will work for us. It is a long road. But I truly

believe it can't be done without spiritual healing taking place as

well. Whatever you are looking for, I hope you find it. But I have

to be faithful to the truth of my own experience and I believe that it

is God's will that everyone find their healing. There is a place in

your life that only God can fill. We can try to fill it with other

things, but it is like putting a round peg into a square hole. God is

the only One who can fill that hole, and He is the only One who can

truly heal.

It is my hope that you find salvation through Christ.

If that is all that happens because of this group, then I will be

thankful.

With love,

Patty