Some diet memories vs. IE today

[Guest guest]

Fellow IE-ers,

Just some first-of-the-morning memories triggered by Josie's recent post about the WW "trick" she learned to eat a whole bag of frozen veggies to fill herself up. The insanity of dieting is something so sneaky--if you buy the premise (you have to do Diet X to lose weight and feel better about yourself), you find yourself in a constant bind of having to ignore your own body (I have to do WHAT???) to follow their rules.

My most recent diet was WW, which I did online only. Somehow I had resisted joining WW all these years, despite the fact that most of my friends and relatives belonged. Even my mother (who rarely dieted) briefly did WW back in the "eat fish all the time" era. I'd resisted, in part, because of the "in-person meeting" component, partly because I was incensed that I'd have to pay money every week, and partly because I hadn't failed to notice that, er, it wasn't really working longterm for anyone I knew.

Anyway, I digress. My memory this morning was of the horror I felt when I realized that with WW, each time I lost a significant amount of weight, they were going to take Points away from me. I called a WW veteran girlfriend of mine and asked (afraid of the answer), "Are they going to take away Points *every time* I lose weight?? I'm already eating so little! How can I survive on fewer Points than this?" My girlfriend commiserated, but I still felt betrayed and did a good deal of whining: WW hadn't warned me this was how it was going to go. It had started out being so easy, but now it was going to get hard, just like every other diet! I was going to have to go hungry again!

And what happened? I went through one more Point reduction but then found myself NOT losing weight, I'm sure because I was eating more food to slow down my weight loss (I "kept forgetting" to track Points during this time) so I wouldn't have to lose more Points. Diet-induced self-sabotage!

Contrast this morning: I had half a breakfast croissant (egg, roasted veggies, gruyere cheese) with half a serving of breakfast potatoes I had not eaten yesterday morning because I was full. This yummy breakfast doggie bag was from Cafe Selmarie, my very favorite brunch place. But I really really wanted oatmeal and fruit this morning, so I gave up, gladly, my croissant breakfast treasure to my husband, who was happy indeed to have it. Not a second thought for me. No regrets. Loved my oatmeal and fruit. Feel very satisfied.

THIS is heaven.

Laurie