Re: Back but very disappointed. Stop the insanity, please, friends.

[Guest guest]

I too am passing over the posts re: caregivers and patients...enough

said and hopefully, all will work out and everyone will be at peace.

Joy in Seattle

-- In Breathe-Support , denise randel

wrote:

>

> So glad you are back Bruce! 

>

>     Sarcoid/PF  3/2006   California

>

>

>

>

> Back but very disappointed. Stop the

insanity, please, friends.

>

>

>

> I have been ready for a couple of days to start reading and posting

> again. However, I just haven't been up to stepping into the

situation

> taking place on this forum. I haven't read all the posts and don't

know

> all the details of what kicked things off but I've seen more

ugliness in

> catching up on posts than I imagined and more anger and feelings

hurt.

> Anyone who says its not personal hasn't read closely enough.

>

> There are many many many apologies called for. I encourage any of

you to

> reread your posts and some of the statements or words. It has

escalated

> with each new post it seems. This isn't patients versus caregivers,

its

> supposed friends versus friends. I care for all those involved

posting

> on this subject but I'm angry and disappointed too.

>

> A few comments of my own. First, I refuse to offer an opinion on who

> should be allowed on this forum. That isn't my place. To Leanne or

> whomever posted the poll. It was a mistake. Some things are best not

> turned over to the members. Allowing or not allowing someone here

is a

> decision the moderators and administrators and board owners should

make

> on an individual basis. You make it with every new member and you

have

> the right with any existing members. In the past I've seen you very

> liberal in not banning people but just professionally dealing in

private

> with any who you have problems with.

>

> Now as to members. If your problem is with someone someone says to

you

> and another individual here then don't air it in public. Talk to

them

> through email in private and work it out. If you can't work it out,

then

> email the moderator, but don't expect them to solve it either. If

you

> don't like someone's posts then don't read them. It's simple. I was

told

> early by several in sometimes a nice way and sometimes not that my

posts

> are too long. My response was and is, just skip over them all if you

> like.

>

> One comment on the huge issue of caretakers and patients reading

each

> other's posts. Look, its easy enough to get on any forum in yahoo

with a

> made up profile or any other way. No forum can control who reads

what.

> This participation or reading is something of trust between a

patient

> and caregiver. Its the same with spouses on any forum. If you want a

> place of your own just ask your spouse or child or parent or friend

not

> to intrude on it. You know we say that no doctors or nurses but just

> patients. Now I'll bet there are lurkers on all forums who don't

> " belong " but they're keeping quiet, learning, and not hurting

anything.

>

> See, I don't care. I generally have no problems with anyone here.

Are

> there those whose posts I like more than others? Of course. Now,

I'm not

> going to point out any of the posts made that bother me. No one

should

> assume its their post or not theirs. While it may be some of those

that

> have obviously been problematic, its others that have slipped

through

> too. This discussion has not been one held at a decent appropriate

> level. Even some of the best posts have slipped in an offensive

word or

> two if one wanted to read carefully and react.

>

> So, please, everyone, come back to being those who I love and who

mean

> so much to me. Stop on this subject. Show the love this forum is

known

> for. To the moderators and administrator, please get rid of this

poll,

> for the first time I know ban more publishing on this topic, try to

talk

> off board to some of those hurt by the ugliness and some of those

who

> have offended others, and go back to deciding by whatever rules or

means

> you want who is allowed here and isn't.

>

> Now, I will only post and respond on other topics. I have no

intention

> of going back and reading carefully the posts I've missed in the

last

> three weeks. I've seen more than I care to in just scanning the

digests.

> I love the forum and love those here. However, what I've seen makes

me

> want to cry and has created a very unhealthy environment for all of

us.

> Don't we have more important things to deal with? I love you all,

but I

> don't love some of the actions and words.

>

> Bruce Moreland 58 UIP 08/07

>