Re: Re: WENT NC....BUT HOW CAN I MORN SOMETHING THAT NEVER EXISTED?

[Guest guest]

Welcome, sweetie! Yes, I agree on the lawyer, sometimes we need a double

check of our logic after all the mind games growing up. Don't know which way

is up!

Welcome and best, talk to us any time! Hugs!!

On Mon, Sep 6, 2010 at 9:59 PM, anuria67854 wrote:

>

>

> Yep, we get it, for sure. The high-functioning bpds and npds can appear

> charming and charismatic when it suits their purpose, and they can save up

> their irritability, frustration and rage and unleash it only against those

> who can't or won't fight back (their own children and/or spouse, or maybe a

> pet) behind the privacy of closed doors. My bpd/npd mother is like that.

> People who don't know her very well think she is just adorable, but they

> don't see her with her mask of perfection off.

> I'm so sorry you're having to deal with the super-waif; that's got to be

> very stressful and frustrating for you. Good for you for just consulting

> with an attorney about her case, at least now you know for sure that she

> could easily have gotten help for herself but chose to play the victim

> instead. Such choices clearly illustrate how dysfunctional her mind is.

> -Annie

>

>

>

> >

> > Hello everyone,

> >

> > I have never posted before but I feel like I need support from people

> that really understand.

> >

> > My nada is really getting my goat even after 2 months NC. She has many

> faces...the waif, witch, drama queen...but she only shows her BPD to me. She

> is super charasmatic...there for everyone but me. She cleans and cooks for

> her friends, takes them to Dr's appointments...people thing she is the

> greatest! Needless to say everyone in my family thinks I am cold and

> calculating...how could I ever cut someone so nice out of my life?

> >

> > My mom never protected me nor loved me. She has mentally and physically

> abused me since I remember concious thought. She had this " game " she used to

> play with me calling me things like rooten old tuna fish sandwich when i was

> about 3 years old and I had to come up with something mean to say back. I

> didnt get it then and now after I have had children i really wonder what was

> going on in her head. I never got to pick out my own clothes make any

> decisions on what classes i took like piano...swimming i did what she wanted

> me to do even though i hated it. She threw me out of her house when I was 14

> because her boyfriend came on to me and she chose him over me. She doesnt

> believe me to this day even though they have been broken up for at least 10

> years...

> >

> > I have been off and on NC and LC for about 20 years.(i live 400 miles

> away from her) The reason i went NC this time is because she has not gotten

> the correct medical treatment or tests after a car accident. She has been

> walking around with a broken leg for about a year. She was in waif mode.

> Every day she complained about her leg yet did nothing about it! i told her

> what to do yet she refused to go anywhere but urgent care because of

> course... all nadas dont have good insurance or any money...for that

> matter>>> this is where it gets good... my husband is a Dr. and only treats

> people injured in car accidents. i told her she does not have to pay

> anything and that she just has to hire an attorney. car insurance will pay

> for all her tests and treatments. Instead she wanted to pay for the tests

> herself and if she could not could i give her the money? I took the bully by

> the horns and called an attorney and made her an appointment...i told her i

> absolutely would not help her pay for a $5,000 mri since she could get one

> for free! She told me to get off my high horse because i dont know

> everything and car insurance is different in her state!

> > I told her I talked to the attorney in her state and it is just about the

> same. she hung up on me. the point is I really felt bad for her and wanted

> her to get better. i thought she had a blood clot or something and it

> worried me that she was not taking care of herself. now i know it was just a

> huge manipulation ploy for sympathy...she loved being a cripple she got all

> this attention i dont think she wanted to give it up. but now she has a huge

> cast...i am sure she is loving it! especially because the dr's will still

> give her pain pills!

> > bpd on narcodics=trouble!

> >

> > my life is just too busy to play nada games right now...i know as she

> ages it is just going to get worse. i am afraid!!!!!

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Welcome, sweetie! Yes, I agree on the lawyer, sometimes we need a double

check of our logic after all the mind games growing up. Don't know which way

is up!

Welcome and best, talk to us any time! Hugs!!

On Mon, Sep 6, 2010 at 9:59 PM, anuria67854 wrote:

>

>

> Yep, we get it, for sure. The high-functioning bpds and npds can appear

> charming and charismatic when it suits their purpose, and they can save up

> their irritability, frustration and rage and unleash it only against those

> who can't or won't fight back (their own children and/or spouse, or maybe a

> pet) behind the privacy of closed doors. My bpd/npd mother is like that.

> People who don't know her very well think she is just adorable, but they

> don't see her with her mask of perfection off.

> I'm so sorry you're having to deal with the super-waif; that's got to be

> very stressful and frustrating for you. Good for you for just consulting

> with an attorney about her case, at least now you know for sure that she

> could easily have gotten help for herself but chose to play the victim

> instead. Such choices clearly illustrate how dysfunctional her mind is.

> -Annie

>

>

>

> >

> > Hello everyone,

> >

> > I have never posted before but I feel like I need support from people

> that really understand.

> >

> > My nada is really getting my goat even after 2 months NC. She has many

> faces...the waif, witch, drama queen...but she only shows her BPD to me. She

> is super charasmatic...there for everyone but me. She cleans and cooks for

> her friends, takes them to Dr's appointments...people thing she is the

> greatest! Needless to say everyone in my family thinks I am cold and

> calculating...how could I ever cut someone so nice out of my life?

> >

> > My mom never protected me nor loved me. She has mentally and physically

> abused me since I remember concious thought. She had this " game " she used to

> play with me calling me things like rooten old tuna fish sandwich when i was

> about 3 years old and I had to come up with something mean to say back. I

> didnt get it then and now after I have had children i really wonder what was

> going on in her head. I never got to pick out my own clothes make any

> decisions on what classes i took like piano...swimming i did what she wanted

> me to do even though i hated it. She threw me out of her house when I was 14

> because her boyfriend came on to me and she chose him over me. She doesnt

> believe me to this day even though they have been broken up for at least 10

> years...

> >

> > I have been off and on NC and LC for about 20 years.(i live 400 miles

> away from her) The reason i went NC this time is because she has not gotten

> the correct medical treatment or tests after a car accident. She has been

> walking around with a broken leg for about a year. She was in waif mode.

> Every day she complained about her leg yet did nothing about it! i told her

> what to do yet she refused to go anywhere but urgent care because of

> course... all nadas dont have good insurance or any money...for that

> matter>>> this is where it gets good... my husband is a Dr. and only treats

> people injured in car accidents. i told her she does not have to pay

> anything and that she just has to hire an attorney. car insurance will pay

> for all her tests and treatments. Instead she wanted to pay for the tests

> herself and if she could not could i give her the money? I took the bully by

> the horns and called an attorney and made her an appointment...i told her i

> absolutely would not help her pay for a $5,000 mri since she could get one

> for free! She told me to get off my high horse because i dont know

> everything and car insurance is different in her state!

> > I told her I talked to the attorney in her state and it is just about the

> same. she hung up on me. the point is I really felt bad for her and wanted

> her to get better. i thought she had a blood clot or something and it

> worried me that she was not taking care of herself. now i know it was just a

> huge manipulation ploy for sympathy...she loved being a cripple she got all

> this attention i dont think she wanted to give it up. but now she has a huge

> cast...i am sure she is loving it! especially because the dr's will still

> give her pain pills!

> > bpd on narcodics=trouble!

> >

> > my life is just too busy to play nada games right now...i know as she

> ages it is just going to get worse. i am afraid!!!!!

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Welcome, sweetie! Yes, I agree on the lawyer, sometimes we need a double

check of our logic after all the mind games growing up. Don't know which way

is up!

Welcome and best, talk to us any time! Hugs!!

On Mon, Sep 6, 2010 at 9:59 PM, anuria67854 wrote:

>

>

> Yep, we get it, for sure. The high-functioning bpds and npds can appear

> charming and charismatic when it suits their purpose, and they can save up

> their irritability, frustration and rage and unleash it only against those

> who can't or won't fight back (their own children and/or spouse, or maybe a

> pet) behind the privacy of closed doors. My bpd/npd mother is like that.

> People who don't know her very well think she is just adorable, but they

> don't see her with her mask of perfection off.

> I'm so sorry you're having to deal with the super-waif; that's got to be

> very stressful and frustrating for you. Good for you for just consulting

> with an attorney about her case, at least now you know for sure that she

> could easily have gotten help for herself but chose to play the victim

> instead. Such choices clearly illustrate how dysfunctional her mind is.

> -Annie

>

>

>

> >

> > Hello everyone,

> >

> > I have never posted before but I feel like I need support from people

> that really understand.

> >

> > My nada is really getting my goat even after 2 months NC. She has many

> faces...the waif, witch, drama queen...but she only shows her BPD to me. She

> is super charasmatic...there for everyone but me. She cleans and cooks for

> her friends, takes them to Dr's appointments...people thing she is the

> greatest! Needless to say everyone in my family thinks I am cold and

> calculating...how could I ever cut someone so nice out of my life?

> >

> > My mom never protected me nor loved me. She has mentally and physically

> abused me since I remember concious thought. She had this " game " she used to

> play with me calling me things like rooten old tuna fish sandwich when i was

> about 3 years old and I had to come up with something mean to say back. I

> didnt get it then and now after I have had children i really wonder what was

> going on in her head. I never got to pick out my own clothes make any

> decisions on what classes i took like piano...swimming i did what she wanted

> me to do even though i hated it. She threw me out of her house when I was 14

> because her boyfriend came on to me and she chose him over me. She doesnt

> believe me to this day even though they have been broken up for at least 10

> years...

> >

> > I have been off and on NC and LC for about 20 years.(i live 400 miles

> away from her) The reason i went NC this time is because she has not gotten

> the correct medical treatment or tests after a car accident. She has been

> walking around with a broken leg for about a year. She was in waif mode.

> Every day she complained about her leg yet did nothing about it! i told her

> what to do yet she refused to go anywhere but urgent care because of

> course... all nadas dont have good insurance or any money...for that

> matter>>> this is where it gets good... my husband is a Dr. and only treats

> people injured in car accidents. i told her she does not have to pay

> anything and that she just has to hire an attorney. car insurance will pay

> for all her tests and treatments. Instead she wanted to pay for the tests

> herself and if she could not could i give her the money? I took the bully by

> the horns and called an attorney and made her an appointment...i told her i

> absolutely would not help her pay for a $5,000 mri since she could get one

> for free! She told me to get off my high horse because i dont know

> everything and car insurance is different in her state!

> > I told her I talked to the attorney in her state and it is just about the

> same. she hung up on me. the point is I really felt bad for her and wanted

> her to get better. i thought she had a blood clot or something and it

> worried me that she was not taking care of herself. now i know it was just a

> huge manipulation ploy for sympathy...she loved being a cripple she got all

> this attention i dont think she wanted to give it up. but now she has a huge

> cast...i am sure she is loving it! especially because the dr's will still

> give her pain pills!

> > bpd on narcodics=trouble!

> >

> > my life is just too busy to play nada games right now...i know as she

> ages it is just going to get worse. i am afraid!!!!!

> >

>

>

>