Re: Re: I'm comfused and need some logic

[Guest guest]

Good luck in the interview!! You can do it! Sorry I'm late to this thread.

I'm also in IT (Unix SA) and have been for twelve years. I recently had my

first kid and am noticing that I'm having to fight even harder for equality

now that I'm getting older and have other commitments on my time. People

are correcting me when I'm not wrong, not involving me when they should.

I totally and completely understand the impulse to flee the field. You put

in your time, get your training and degrees, work for years and have a great

resume, and you're even more ignored and it's even harder to get equality

than when you started. Every day in every way you have to in top form just

to get the same respect as everyone else. It's exhausting.

The other day I was putting RAM into my laptop and this kid (who works for

me!) comes over and starts directing me on what to do, every minute detail -

which screws to unscrew, how to slide the case open, etc, etc. I was so

angry (hello? I was doing this when you were ten years old, jerk) but I

don't know how to tell people to stop mistreating me without really

overdoing it.

How do you stand up for yourself on a daily basis? I think of it as a rock

slide. If I could stop the first few rocks (people underestimating me at

small things that I really can do well), I could stop the destruction of my

career where no one including myself takes me seriously.

On Fri, Sep 10, 2010 at 12:29 PM, Stefanie Low wrote:

> Thank you very much for validating what I feel. Sometimes I just don't

> know

> what is real and what is my own insecurities and old programing. I'm not

> sue what I want to do..Part of me says you invested so much time and effort

> and you are good at what you do so why stop doining it just beouse you have

> boobes. Then an other part of me things..It's such ano win siuation..I'm

> not a guru looking for the latest gadjet and have to know how it works and

> what it can do. I'd rather build networks and make them secure..Plus help

> everyday people understand computers.

>

> Which leads me to what you said . I often envision a commersial

> (simular to geek squad) for an all Female IT company. With beautiful smart

> woman drivng sportcars. Showing up to solve your problems. Can you image

> that..all looking like the pussycat dolls LOL...we could charge 2 times the

> amout..Heck I think people (mostly men) would be breaking there systems

> daily LOL.

>

> No I'm not serious....though sex sells I would stick to what I'm really

> trying to potray. We work just as hard and we can do what you guys can do.

> As a matter of fact the momens brain works diffrently then a man..in some

> cases it may be benifical to the problem you are trying to diagnose.

>

> So what do you think and Casey? Should we open up an all girl IT

> company and we can change the perception of women in the IT world:)

>

> Bye the way I have an interview Thursday with the distric court in my state

> for an IT job..wish me luck!

>

> Stefanie

>

>

> On Fri, Sep 10, 2010 at 7:18 AM, shirleyspawn <talexander73@...

> >wrote:

>

> >

> >

> > (and Casey) - Isn't it weird that computers - the technology

> that

> > has come along at the same time as the rise of feminism - STILL gets the

> > " macho man " attachment? Especially since, to the rest of the world, these

> IT

> > guys don't exactly fit the stereotype of a Schwarzenegger or Wayne!

> > It's a field where being able to bench press your own weight is just not

> > that important so you'd think gender differences wouldn't come into play.

> >

> > That being said, you know what I'd LOVE to see - some women with IT

> skills

> > who would combine their proficiency with a lack of the " IT guy attitude "

> -

> > so the rest of us, who cannot figure out why our PC is doing whatever

> weird

> > thing it's doing (this time...) - could just get the dang thing fixed

> > without putting up with a bunch of condescension. In addition, we could

> use

> > some help with unraveling the gobbledygook when setting up computers for

> our

> > kids to use (just give 'em the homework software, and keep the porn

> out!),

> > and updates on how to go in there and make sure they're not " sexting "

> when

> > they say they're writing a term paper.

> >

> > Maybe the two of you could become the next great entrepreneurs!

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

> > >

> > > I was just on the phone with my friend she called me to tell me she

> > > got locked out of her computer and if I had changed it when I fixed it

> > > last.(I have been in IT for over 13 year)...In the back ground her

> > > husband is saying " don't worry about it I'll fix it later " ..Over and

> > > over again.every time this guy asks me an IT related question I answer

> > > him and he argues with me..He is not in the it field..far far from it.

> > > And he doesn't ease up until he's right...usually I just stop arguing.

> > >

> > > This is a huge trigger for me..It pisses me off and I don't know if

> > > it's a really thing I sense or if it's just my BPD upbringing that I'm

> > > " just a Girl " and that's a Man thing..I get so frustrated in my field

> > > when people automatically assume a guy would know more. I work

> > > probably twice as hard as any man because I feel I have to prove

> > > myself . Usually it goes like this...they call ask for the guy to

> > > call them or visit them..If he is not around and I go and I fix there

> > > problem too (imagine that!) then people are ok and usually very

> > > willing to have me help them. My coworkers are great and they teat me

> > > normal. But the thing that pisses me off is that at first people don't

> > > think I know much....I'm not very Geeky I don't talk in acronyms and I

> > > don't fit the stereo type. Once the CEO came in the office and asked

> > > me where are the IT guys I said they were busy.and If I could help

> > > him with anything ..and he sat down and then said how about

> > > coffee...And I smiled and said...thank you I like cream and suger...he

> > > got me coffee. Then apologies because he thought I was a

> > > sectary...This man and I formed a very good professional relationship

> > > after and we laugh about that first day. It just confirms for me that

> > > there is a problem. I just like helping people and solving problems.

> > > But Lately I wonder if I really like it any more.

> > >

> > > I was laid-off 2 years ago this October. I worked a 6 month contract

> > > job that ended in May so I'm back job hunting..and I'm really thinking

> > > of just chaging fields like to Nursing..something good and female-ish

> > > and I liked that too..I love medical anything. I believe employers

> > > are picking men over me..I know they are " not suppose " to But I

> > > believe that maybe if two of us are qualified and have the same

> > > experience they will pick a man over me.

> > >

> > > So what do you think..am I being Logical or am experiencing Fleas?.

> > > Are my thoughts valid?

> > > Some times I don't know whats real or what Nada telling me how no good

> I

> > am

> > >

> > > Could someone honestly set me straigh?

> > >

> > > Stefanie

> > >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>