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void of feelings

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Do any of you- ever find it hard to express what you are feeling?

This week I attended a very sad funeral- my cousin passed away.

Young man with 2 children and he was the 3rd adult child to dieb out of his

parents' 5 children. I can't even imagine burying 3 children.

At the services there was not a dry eye- but my were. As much as I felt

empathy for all involved- I could not cry- I shed no tears. I just couldn't. I

experienced this before when my grandfather died- nothing again.

Also the opposite feeling of pure

joy and happiness is so hard for me to feel- anyone else have this

experience of almost having no way to express what you are really feeling-

because your feelings are so stuffed deep inside of you- and your feelings were

really never recognized or acknowledged- so it is like you have lost them.

Thanks,

Malinda

Ps- Nada cried like a baby at the services- and I sat there thinking what is

wrong with me.....

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