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I had a bit of a binge tonight--I was feeling frustrated about

something non-food related and let myself go a little. I was quite

conscious of what I was doing, but the good thing was that before it

really hit full-blown status, I stopped and thought, "This really

doesn't taste good, and I'm really not hungry. Is this worth it?" I

decided it wasn't, finished the piece of chocolate I was eating, and

put the rest away. A small semi-victory, but something. : )

Jeannie

mikey wrote:

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a

lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have

for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i

know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it

took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will

take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and

re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal

Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this

step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor

it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has

been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I

try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety

signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat

whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used

to binge on has lost some of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that

Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in

the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because

you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck

and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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Hi Everyone...

I second that, thank you everyone... I just ordered my recommended reading and today I have no food plan. YIKES !

Love to you all...

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: telltalemikey@...Date: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 01:52:37 +0000Subject: Re: guilt

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!>> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!> > Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some of their allure. > > You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck and don't give up!> > All the best,> Jeanne>

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i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a

lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have

for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i

know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it

took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will

take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and

re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal

Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this

step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor

it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has

been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I

try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety

signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat

whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used

to binge on has lost some of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that

Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in

the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because

you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck

and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a

lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have

for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i

know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it

took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will

take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and

re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal

Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this

step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor

it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has

been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I

try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety

signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat

whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used

to binge on has lost some of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that

Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in

the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because

you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck

and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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Grrr...don't be too impressed.  I binged more after I posted--not a

lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and

did it anyway.  I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling

a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost

always do binge.  I need to figure out how to head off that anxious

feeling, but I'm not sure how.  Yesterday I at least stalled it for

several hours, which is better than in the past. 

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

 

i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be

supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

 

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i

am doing a

lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have

for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i

know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it

took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will

take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and

re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal

Eating."  I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!

>  

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk,  reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this

step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in.  But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor

it!  Principle 4:  Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has

been very helpful.  Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I

try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety

signals and how my stomach feels.  In giving myself permission to eat

whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used

to binge on has lost some of their allure. 

>  

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that

Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in

the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because

you're not depriving yourself.  Hope this helps in some way!  Good luck

and don't give up!

>  

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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I hate to piggy back on your thread but my question seems

relevant here and it’s one I’ve been contemplating for the past few days…

How do you (anyone feel free to answer) define “binge�  Or is

it kind of just one of those “I know it when I see it/do it†things?

From:

IntuitiveEating_Support

[mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58

Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 11:22 AM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a

lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it

anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little

anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do

binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm

not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is

better than in the past.

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

i'm very

impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

i

wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of

self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile.

even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to

be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form

this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the

relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on " The Rules of Normal

Eating. " I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading

it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as

periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and

savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in

" Intuitive Eating " has been very helpful. Also when I do

eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful

manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach

feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've

made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some

of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and

enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied

and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness

goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps

in some way! Good luck and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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Hi Jeannie...

Im right there with you Jeannie... I overate last night too, but pressed upon myself that that is normal at first. I DON"T HAVE A FOOD PLAN TODAY, and am very excited to see what CHOICES I might make today. I am grateful to God that I like healthy food, and feel even better when I exercise...

KEEP THE GOAL IN MIND... You are not alone, so start again , NOW...

hang in there...

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jeanniet58@...Date: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 09:21:59 -0800Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past. Jeannie Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!>> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!> > Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some of their allure. > > You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck and don't give up!> > All the best,> Jeanne>

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Hi Diane,

I've been working without a food plan for a few days now, and that part

of things is going well.  I feel much better not having a plan, just

need to trust myself.  I'm still feeling that vague anxiety today, so

I'm just going to try to live with it and see how things go.  I need to

learn to stop using food every time I don't know what to do with myself.

Jeannie

Diane Melanson wrote:

 

Hi Jeannie...

 

Im right there with you Jeannie...  I overate last night too, but

pressed upon myself that that is normal at first.  I DON"T HAVE A FOOD

PLAN TODAY, and am very excited to see what CHOICES I might make

today.  I am grateful to God that I like healthy food, and feel even

better when I exercise...

 

KEEP THE GOAL IN MIND...  You are not alone, so start again , NOW... 

hang in there...

 

Diane

 

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

From: jeanniet58gmail

Date: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 09:21:59 -0800

Subject: Re: Re: guilt

 

Grrr...don't be too impressed.  I binged more

after I posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I

wasn't enjoying it and did it anyway.  I've been noticing that prior to

binges I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about

binging, and then I almost always do binge.  I need to figure out how

to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how.  Yesterday I at

least stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past. 

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

 

i'm very

impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

 

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some

very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling

better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not

eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to

myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this

bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the

relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you

again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal

Eating."  I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!

>  

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk,  reminding myself that there are

no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as

periodically a negative thought will sneak in.  But if I choose to have

that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it!  Principle 4: 

Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. 

Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a

more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my

stomach feels.  In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want,

I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has

lost some of their allure. 

>  

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that

Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in

the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because

you're not depriving yourself.  Hope this helps in some way!  Good luck

and don't give up!

>  

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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My definition of "binge" is when I'm eating (mindlessly or not) just to

eat--I don't really want to, it doesn't really taste good, but I can't

seem to stop.  Sometimes normal eating will segue into a binge.  For me

there seems to be a point where the binge switch flips on and the food

just becomes something to fill my mouth.  I was bulimic for a number of

years and now my binges have at least progressed to the point where I

won't eat until I'm almost physically sick (because I can't barf up the

food anymore), but I'll still get to the point of being pretty

uncomfortable sometimes.  I'm working on cutting down on that part.

Jeannie

Karlen wrote:

 

I hate to piggy back

on your thread but my question seems

relevant here and it’s one I’ve been contemplating for the past few

days…

 

How do you (anyone

feel free to answer) define “binge�  Or is

it kind of just one of those “I know it when I see it/do it†things?

 

From:

IntuitiveEating_Support

[mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On

Behalf Of jeanniet58

Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 11:22 AM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: Re: guilt

 

 

Grrr...don't be too impressed.  I binged more after I posted--not

a

lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and

did it

anyway.  I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a

little

anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do

binge.  I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but

I'm

not sure how.  Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which

is

better than in the past. 

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

 

i'm very impressed by your

ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

 

i wanted

to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of

self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for

awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know

that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me

a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a

while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE

book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal

Eating."  I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!

>  

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk,  reminding myself that there are

no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as

periodically a negative thought will sneak in.  But if I choose to have

that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it!  Principle 4: 

Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. 

Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a

more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my

stomach feels.  In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want,

I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has

lost some of their allure. 

>  

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that

Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in

the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because

you're not depriving yourself.  Hope this helps in some way!  Good luck

and don't give up!

>  

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

 

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In addition to becoming an IE I’m also a member of Overeaters

Anonymous.  Some might say these are incompatible things to do but I’m not sure

I agree.  But the challenge does come in defining “abstinenceâ€.  OA does not

define this term for you and many have included specific foods (usually flour,

sugar, deep fried) in their definition of abstinence.  Being an aspiring IE I

have not included specific foods in my definition. 

On another IE community I’m a part of there was a very negative

thread about Overeaters Anonymous because it was viewed as “more restrictive

than Weight Watchers†among other things.  OA does suggest you have a “plan of

eating†but it doesn’t tell you what that plan should be.  For me I’ve decided

that IE is MY plan of eating and I think that works.

I’d be curious on anyone else’s thoughts on the OA topic as

well.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support

[mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58

Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:24 PM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: Re: guilt

My definition of " binge " is when I'm eating (mindlessly or not)

just to eat--I don't really want to, it doesn't really taste good, but I can't

seem to stop. Sometimes normal eating will segue into a binge. For

me there seems to be a point where the binge switch flips on and the food just

becomes something to fill my mouth. I was bulimic for a number of years

and now my binges have at least progressed to the point where I won't eat until

I'm almost physically sick (because I can't barf up the food anymore), but I'll

still get to the point of being pretty uncomfortable sometimes. I'm

working on cutting down on that part.

Jeannie

Karlen wrote:

I hate to piggy back on your thread but

my question seems relevant here and it’s one I’ve been contemplating for the

past few days…

How do you (anyone feel free to answer)

define “binge� Or is it kind of just one of those “I know it when I see

it/do it†things?

From:

IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ]

On Behalf Of jeanniet58

Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 11:22 AM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a

lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it

anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little

anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do

binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm

not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is

better than in the past.

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to

stay present and be supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you.

some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better

about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as

'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to

understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with

food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back

and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on " The Rules of Normal

Eating. " I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading

it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as

periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and

savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in

" Intuitive Eating " has been very helpful. Also when I do

eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful

manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach

feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've

made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some

of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and

enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied

and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness

goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps

in some way! Good luck and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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Jeanne,

I think that that is a victory indeed! Not because of when you stopped eating, but because you realized that your eating wasn't solving the issue you faced. And found a way to address your needs in a way that worked better for you than eating when not hungry. That's awesome!

Also, for what it's worth, I don't use the word " binge " for myself for two reasons. One, because it has such strong negative conotations.  It feels really harsh and judgemental. And two, because I never knew exactly what a binge was. Is it eating when not hungry? If I eat one cookie when I wasn't hungry, was that a binge? This is not a rhetorical question; I really don't know the answer!

So for me, I like to just say " I ate when I wasn't hungry. " It feels much gentler. And everyone does it from time to time, even people without eating issues.

Congratulations again on your exciting progress!

Abby

 

I had a bit of a binge tonight--I was feeling frustrated about

something non-food related and let myself go a little.  I was quite

conscious of what I was doing, but the good thing was that before it

really hit full-blown status, I stopped and thought, " This really

doesn't taste good, and I'm really not hungry.  Is this worth it? "   I

decided it wasn't, finished the piece of chocolate I was eating, and

put the rest away.  A small semi-victory, but something.  : )

Jeannie

mikey wrote:

>

>  

>

> i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of s...

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I like that! "I ate when I wasn't hungry" is much less punitive than

"binge." I'm going to borrow that one. ; )

JeannieT (I'm going to sign like this now so Jeanne and I don't mix you

up!)

Abigail Wolfson wrote:

Jeanne,

I think that that is a victory indeed! Not because of when you

stopped eating, but because you realized that your eating wasn't

solving the issue you faced. And found a way to address your needs in a

way that worked better for you than eating when not hungry. That's

awesome!

Also, for what it's worth, I don't use the word "binge" for myself

for two reasons. One, because it has such strong negative conotations.

It feels really harsh and judgemental. And two, because I never knew

exactly what a binge was. Is it eating when not hungry? If I eat one

cookie when I wasn't hungry, was that a binge? This is not a rhetorical

question; I really don't know the answer!

So for me, I like to just say "I ate when I wasn't hungry." It

feels much gentler. And everyone does it from time to time, even people

without eating issues.

Congratulations again on your exciting progress!

Abby

On Jan 29, 2010 1:33 AM, "jeanniet58" <jeanniet58gmail> wrote:

I had a bit of a binge tonight--I was feeling frustrated about

something non-food related and let myself go a little. I was quite

conscious of what I was doing, but the good thing was that before it

really hit full-blown status, I stopped and thought, "This really

doesn't taste good, and I'm really not hungry. Is this worth it?" I

decided it wasn't, finished the piece of chocolate I was eating, and

put the rest away. A small semi-victory, but something. : )

Jeannie

mikey wrote:

>

>

>

> i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a

lot of s...

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I was in OA for several years, and in many ways it was helpful. I loved the spiritual element to the program, and enjoyed having a supportive community. And working the steps was very helpful for seeing my faults and beginning to address them.

But I could not get past seeing the plan of eating as, in its nature, restrictive. It felt like a diet to me, and most of teh people around me treated it that way. The fundamental message I heard, over and over again, was that I should not trust myself when it came to eating.

I lost 130 pounds in OA. Then regained it all.

If it works for you, I'm happy for you. It ultimately did not work for me.

Harry

-----Original Message-----From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of KarlenSent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:44 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: RE: Re: guilt

In addition to becoming an IE I’m also a member of Overeaters Anonymous. Some might say these are incompatible things to do but I’m not sure I agree. But the challenge does come in defining “abstinence”. OA does not define this term for you and many have included specific foods (usually flour, sugar, deep fried) in their definition of abstinence. Being an aspiring IE I have not included specific foods in my definition.

On another IE community I’m a part of there was a very negative thread about Overeaters Anonymous because it was viewed as “more restrictive than Weight Watchers” among other things. OA does suggest you have a “plan of eating” but it doesn’t tell you what that plan should be. For me I’ve decided that IE is MY plan of eating and I think that works.

I’d be curious on anyone else’s thoughts on the OA topic as well.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:24 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

My definition of "binge" is when I'm eating (mindlessly or not) just to eat--I don't really want to, it doesn't really taste good, but I can't seem to stop. Sometimes normal eating will segue into a binge. For me there seems to be a point where the binge switch flips on and the food just becomes something to fill my mouth. I was bulimic for a number of years and now my binges have at least progressed to the point where I won't eat until I'm almost physically sick (because I can't barf up the food anymore), but I'll still get to the point of being pretty uncomfortable sometimes. I'm working on cutting down on that part.Jeannie Karlen wrote:

I hate to piggy back on your thread but my question seems relevant here and it’s one I’ve been contemplating for the past few days…

How do you (anyone feel free to answer) define “binge”? Or is it kind of just one of those “I know it when I see it/do it” things?

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 11:22 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past. Jeannie Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!>> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!> > Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some of their allure. > > You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck and don't give up!> > All the best,> Jeanne>

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As they say at meetings “take what you want and leave the rest”.

For those there who benefit from the wrote of a rigid food plan I wish them all

the best. Maybe I’ve just lucked out and found a region where the focus is not

as much about food, or how to control it, but rather spiritual recovery.

My feeling is that without the spiritual recovery I would have

never been able to even make sense of IE.

Yes, there are people who talk in terms such as “one X isn’t

enough so why have one?” or “the 80lb cookie” but by and large I love the

spiritual side which I know was lacking and, at least so far, have not seen

much about specific eating. I get the feeling that this might also be an

evolution of OA – I’ve heard reference to “when there were” food lists, etc.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support

[mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of Harry

LeBlanc

Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 3:09 PM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: RE: Re: guilt

I was in OA for several years, and in many ways it was

helpful. I loved the spiritual element to the program, and enjoyed having a

supportive community. And working the steps was very helpful for seeing my

faults and beginning to address them.

But I could not get past seeing the plan of eating as, in its

nature, restrictive. It felt like a diet to me, and most of teh people around

me treated it that way. The fundamental message I heard, over and over again,

was that I should not trust myself when it came to eating.

I lost 130 pounds in OA. Then regained it all.

If it works for you, I'm happy for you. It ultimately did not work

for me.

Harry

Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a

lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it

anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little

anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do

binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm

not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is

better than in the past.

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to

stay present and be supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you.

some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better

about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as

'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to

understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with

food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back

and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on " The Rules of Normal

Eating. " I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading

it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as

periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and

savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in

" Intuitive Eating " has been very helpful. Also when I do

eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful

manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach

feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've

made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some

of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and

enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied

and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness

goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps

in some way! Good luck and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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I'm starting a knitting class next week, so I'll see what that does.

Another issue I have is constantly wanting to be doing something with

my mouth (lol, no jokes). I used to bite my fingernails and smoke.

Broke those two habits, at least. I chew on the inside of my cheek,

especially when I'm anxious or thinking. I like to eat sunflower seeds

in the shell because it gives my mouth something to do, but obviously I

don't want to be eating those all day long, or I'll drink a lot of

tea. Now I'm trying to break myself of this habit, which is another

reason why I'm really trying to make sure I eat a full meal when I'm

hungry. I need to have a break in between eating so I can learn to

live with not working my mouth all the time, lol.

JeannieT

mikey wrote:

i can relate with you. my binges almost ALWAYS begin with feeling

of anxiety. and then i guess i turn to food to blanket those

uncomfortable feelings because that is the tool i have used the most in

the past. that is what bothers me most with my relationship with food.

i love food, i love what it can do for my body, i love to cook, i love

the memories you can make. but the fact that i use food to smother

feelings of anxiety is not okay to me. i have not found a sure fire way

to avoid this yet. but hobbies do work sometimes. especially stuff i do

with my hands. but you have to practice them regularly, not just when

you have the urge to binge.

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I think OA can be a great thing for some people, but I was hesitant to

try it because at this point in my struggle I just don't want to deal

with anything that's restrictive at all. From what I understand of 12

step programs, you also need to acknowledge your lack of control, and

that's something I just don't want to do, or admit. I'm not helpless

over this, or at least I don't want to be. I'm working to feel like

I'm in control of my life, not food.

JeannieT

Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I

posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't

enjoying it and did it anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges

I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and

then I almost always do binge. I need to figure out how to head off

that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how. Yesterday I at least

stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past.

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your

ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

i

wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of

self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for

awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know

that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me

a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a

while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE

book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal

Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are

no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as

periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have

that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4:

Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful.

Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a

more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my

stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want,

I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has

lost some of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that

Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in

the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because

you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck

and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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Share on other sites

I think step 1 – “admit you’re powerless over food” – can be

taken multiple ways. Yes, there’s the “I’m completely useless and can’t

control myself” way which I think some do. For me my step 1 was synonymous

with making my peace with food as described in the IE book – just admitting to

myself that the way I’ve done things with regards to food my whole life was not

working for me and I needed to stop fighting.

From:

IntuitiveEating_Support

[mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58

Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 5:25 PM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: Re: Re: guilt

I think OA can be a great thing for some

people, but I was hesitant to try it because at this point in my struggle I

just don't want to deal with anything that's restrictive at all. From what

I understand of 12 step programs, you also need to acknowledge your lack of

control, and that's something I just don't want to do, or admit. I'm not

helpless over this, or at least I don't want to be. I'm working to feel

like I'm in control of my life, not food.

JeannieT

Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a

lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it

anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little

anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do

binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm

not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is

better than in the past.

Jeannie

Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to

stay present and be supportive of yourself.

congratulations!

jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you.

some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better

about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as

'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to

understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with

food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back

and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!

>

> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on " The Rules of Normal

Eating. " I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading

it!

>

> Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there

are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as

periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But

if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and

savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in

" Intuitive Eating " has been very helpful. Also when I do

eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful

manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach

feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've

made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some

of their allure.

>

> You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and

enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied

and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness

goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps

in some way! Good luck and don't give up!

>

> All the best,

> Jeanne

>

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Share on other sites

Hi Jeannie...

Thanks for sharing... I have done well for most of the day, but nights are harder and I've eaten food I didn't need ... I have a strong tendency to overeat healthier foods, since that is what is around, but I still go over the edge at times. This is still so new, and very uncomfortable. Im not entirely ready to bag the food plan, since it has shown me how exactly to create and eat a well balanced, nutritional "meal'...

One thing Im grateful for is that I have a God (HP) working in my corner / for my purposes. VERY HELPFUL... Ugh, another day...

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jeanniet58@...Date: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 11:17:46 -0800Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Hi Diane,I've been working without a food plan for a few days now, and that part of things is going well. I feel much better not having a plan, just need to trust myself. I'm still feeling that vague anxiety today, so I'm just going to try to live with it and see how things go. I need to learn to stop using food every time I don't know what to do with myself.JeannieDiane Melanson wrote:

Hi Jeannie... Im right there with you Jeannie... I overate last night too, but pressed upon myself that that is normal at first. I DON"T HAVE A FOOD PLAN TODAY, and am very excited to see what CHOICES I might make today. I am grateful to God that I like healthy food, and feel even better when I exercise... KEEP THE GOAL IN MIND... You are not alone, so start again , NOW... hang in there... Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jeanniet58gmailDate: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 09:21:59 -0800Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past. Jeannie Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!>> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!> > Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some of their allure. > > You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck and don't give up!> > All the best,> Jeanne>

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Hi Harry...

I too am still a member but not willing to live by the "food plan" concept. Each time I'd make one false move beyond even a vegetable boundary, I'd get eaten up by guilt, shame, and ultimately overeat to escape how bad I felt.

But I too appreciate my relationship with God, all his love, power, and help, and also the support of people doing what I needed help doing. So Im not gone from there, but my challenge now will be to create my own "ABSTINENCE", support system, and Recovery. I also just tapped into a branch of people not using a Food Plan at all... Its called Primary Purpose, and there are phone meetings...

Just intense BB focus on working the Steps... Interesting, and Im going there to check it out... Sounds like other people had the same struggles... Glad you're all here however...

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: hleblanc@...Date: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 15:08:41 -0600Subject: RE: Re: guilt

I was in OA for several years, and in many ways it was helpful. I loved the spiritual element to the program, and enjoyed having a supportive community. And working the steps was very helpful for seeing my faults and beginning to address them.

But I could not get past seeing the plan of eating as, in its nature, restrictive. It felt like a diet to me, and most of teh people around me treated it that way. The fundamental message I heard, over and over again, was that I should not trust myself when it came to eating.

I lost 130 pounds in OA. Then regained it all.

If it works for you, I'm happy for you. It ultimately did not work for me.

Harry

-----Original Message-----From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of KarlenSent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:44 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: RE: Re: guilt

In addition to becoming an IE I’m also a member of Overeaters Anonymous. Some might say these are incompatible things to do but I’m not sure I agree. But the challenge does come in defining “abstinence”. OA does not define this term for you and many have included specific foods (usually flour, sugar, deep fried) in their definition of abstinence. Being an aspiring IE I have not included specific foods in my definition.

On another IE community I’m a part of there was a very negative thread about Overeaters Anonymous because it was viewed as “more restrictive than Weight Watchers” among other things. OA does suggest you have a “plan of eating” but it doesn’t tell you what that plan should be. For me I’ve decided that IE is MY plan of eating and I think that works.

I’d be curious on anyone else’s thoughts on the OA topic as well.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:24 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

My definition of "binge" is when I'm eating (mindlessly or not) just to eat--I don't really want to, it doesn't really taste good, but I can't seem to stop. Sometimes normal eating will segue into a binge. For me there seems to be a point where the binge switch flips on and the food just becomes something to fill my mouth. I was bulimic for a number of years and now my binges have at least progressed to the point where I won't eat until I'm almost physically sick (because I can't barf up the food anymore), but I'll still get to the point of being pretty uncomfortable sometimes. I'm working on cutting down on that part.Jeannie Karlen wrote:

I hate to piggy back on your thread but my question seems relevant here and it’s one I’ve been contemplating for the past few days…

How do you (anyone feel free to answer) define “binge”? Or is it kind of just one of those “I know it when I see it/do it” things?

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 11:22 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past. Jeannie Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!>> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!> > Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some of their allure. > > You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck and don't give up!> > All the best,> Jeanne>

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Diane,I'd also encourage you to find a meeting and a sponsor that don't preach food plans or forbidden lists. The meeting I attend does not push this at all and in my work as a sponsor I encourage intuitive eating concepts. I rely on OA for love and support. Any negatives either real or perceived are easily left behind by the "take what you want and leave the rest" that's central to OA and any other 12-step program

Hi Harry...

I too am still a member but not willing to live by the "food plan" concept. Each time I'd make one false move beyond even a vegetable boundary, I'd get eaten up by guilt, shame, and ultimately overeat to escape how bad I felt.

But I too appreciate my relationship with God, all his love, power, and help, and also the support of people doing what I needed help doing. So Im not gone from there, but my challenge now will be to create my own "ABSTINENCE", support system, and Recovery. I also just tapped into a branch of people not using a Food Plan at all... Its called Primary Purpose, and there are phone meetings...

Just intense BB focus on working the Steps... Interesting, and Im going there to check it out... Sounds like other people had the same struggles... Glad you're all here however...

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: hleblancbitstream (DOT) netDate: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 15:08:41 -0600Subject: RE: Re: guilt

I was in OA for several years, and in many ways it was helpful. I loved the spiritual element to the program, and enjoyed having a supportive community. And working the steps was very helpful for seeing my faults and beginning to address them.

But I could not get past seeing the plan of eating as, in its nature, restrictive. It felt like a diet to me, and most of teh people around me treated it that way. The fundamental message I heard, over and over again, was that I should not trust myself when it came to eating.

I lost 130 pounds in OA. Then regained it all.

If it works for you, I'm happy for you. It ultimately did not work for me.

Harry

-----Original Message-----From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of KarlenSent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:44 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: RE: Re: guilt

In addition to becoming an IE I’m also a member of Overeaters Anonymous. Some might say these are incompatible things to do but I’m not sure I agree. But the challenge does come in defining “abstinenceâ€. OA does not define this term for you and many have included specific foods (usually flour, sugar, deep fried) in their definition of abstinence. Being an aspiring IE I have not included specific foods in my definition.

On another IE community I’m a part of there was a very negative thread about Overeaters Anonymous because it was viewed as “more restrictive than Weight Watchers†among other things. OA does suggest you have a “plan of eating†but it doesn’t tell you what that plan should be. For me I’ve decided that IE is MY plan of eating and I think that works.

I’d be curious on anyone else’s thoughts on the OA topic as well.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:24 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

My definition of "binge" is when I'm eating (mindlessly or not) just to eat--I don't really want to, it doesn't really taste good, but I can't seem to stop. Sometimes normal eating will segue into a binge. For me there seems to be a point where the binge switch flips on and the food just becomes something to fill my mouth. I was bulimic for a number of years and now my binges have at least progressed to the point where I won't eat until I'm almost physically sick (because I can't barf up the food anymore), but I'll still get to the point of being pretty uncomfortable sometimes. I'm working on cutting down on that part.Jeannie Karlen wrote:

I hate to piggy back on your thread but my question seems relevant here and it’s one I’ve been contemplating for the past few days…

How do you (anyone feel free to answer) define “binge� Or is it kind of just one of those “I know it when I see it/do it†things?

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 11:22 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past. Jeannie Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!>> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!> > Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some of their allure. > > You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck and don't give up!> > All the best,> Jeanne>

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Thank you so much Jonathon... Im thinking God is at work, since Im learning there are OA people not using a food plan... WHO KNEW ! Sorry, I don't want to get carried away, as OA doesn't work for everyone...

Thanks again everyone for your shares and support... Scary but not eating over it today... ( :

Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: jkarlen@...Date: Sat, 30 Jan 2010 11:06:20 -0600Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Diane,

I'd also encourage you to find a meeting and a sponsor that don't preach food plans or forbidden lists. The meeting I attend does not push this at all and in my work as a sponsor I encourage intuitive eating concepts.

I rely on OA for love and support. Any negatives either real or perceived are easily left behind by the "take what you want and leave the rest" that's central to OA and any other 12-step program

On Jan 30, 2010, at 5:53 AM, Diane Melanson <DMMelansonmsn> wrote:

Hi Harry... I too am still a member but not willing to live by the "food plan" concept. Each time I'd make one false move beyond even a vegetable boundary, I'd get eaten up by guilt, shame, and ultimately overeat to escape how bad I felt. But I too appreciate my relationship with God, all his love, power, and help, and also the support of people doing what I needed help doing. So Im not gone from there, but my challenge now will be to create my own "ABSTINENCE", support system, and Recovery. I also just tapped into a branch of people not using a Food Plan at all... Its called Primary Purpose, and there are phone meetings... Just intense BB focus on working the Steps... Interesting, and Im going there to check it out... Sounds like other people had the same struggles... Glad you're all here however... Diane

To: IntuitiveEating_Support From: hleblancbitstream (DOT) netDate: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 15:08:41 -0600Subject: RE: Re: guilt

I was in OA for several years, and in many ways it was helpful. I loved the spiritual element to the program, and enjoyed having a supportive community. And working the steps was very helpful for seeing my faults and beginning to address them.

But I could not get past seeing the plan of eating as, in its nature, restrictive. It felt like a diet to me, and most of teh people around me treated it that way. The fundamental message I heard, over and over again, was that I should not trust myself when it came to eating.

I lost 130 pounds in OA. Then regained it all.

If it works for you, I'm happy for you. It ultimately did not work for me.

Harry

-----Original Message-----From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of KarlenSent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:44 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: RE: Re: guilt

In addition to becoming an IE I’m also a member of Overeaters Anonymous. Some might say these are incompatible things to do but I’m not sure I agree. But the challenge does come in defining “abstinence”. OA does not define this term for you and many have included specific foods (usually flour, sugar, deep fried) in their definition of abstinence. Being an aspiring IE I have not included specific foods in my definition.

On another IE community I’m a part of there was a very negative thread about Overeaters Anonymous because it was viewed as “more restrictive than Weight Watchers” among other things. OA does suggest you have a “plan of eating” but it doesn’t tell you what that plan should be. For me I’ve decided that IE is MY plan of eating and I think that works.

I’d be curious on anyone else’s thoughts on the OA topic as well.

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 1:24 PMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

My definition of "binge" is when I'm eating (mindlessly or not) just to eat--I don't really want to, it doesn't really taste good, but I can't seem to stop. Sometimes normal eating will segue into a binge. For me there seems to be a point where the binge switch flips on and the food just becomes something to fill my mouth. I was bulimic for a number of years and now my binges have at least progressed to the point where I won't eat until I'm almost physically sick (because I can't barf up the food anymore), but I'll still get to the point of being pretty uncomfortable sometimes. I'm working on cutting down on that part.Jeannie Karlen wrote:

I hate to piggy back on your thread but my question seems relevant here and it’s one I’ve been contemplating for the past few days…

How do you (anyone feel free to answer) define “binge”? Or is it kind of just one of those “I know it when I see it/do it” things?

From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of jeanniet58Sent: Friday, January 29, 2010 11:22 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Re: guilt

Grrr...don't be too impressed. I binged more after I posted--not a lot, and I was present while doing it...but I wasn't enjoying it and did it anyway. I've been noticing that prior to binges I start feeling a little anxious, like I'm worrying about binging, and then I almost always do binge. I need to figure out how to head off that anxious feeling, but I'm not sure how. Yesterday I at least stalled it for several hours, which is better than in the past. Jeannie Todd wrote:

i'm very impressed by your ability to stay present and be supportive of yourself.congratulations!jen

i wanted to thank ALL of you. some very sound advice! i am doing a lot of self-talk. and i'm feeling better about my eating than i have for awhile. even though i'm not eating as 'healthy' as i would like i know that i need to be kind to myself. i need to understand that it took me a long time to form this bad relationship with food and it will take a while to to mend the relationship. i am going back and re-reading my IE book. thank you again!>> Thanks for your comments, Jeannie, on "The Rules of Normal Eating." I have ordered it and can hardly wait to start reading it!> > Mikey, I do a lot of self-talk, reminding myself that there are no forbidden foods. Of course, I haven't totally mastered this step, as periodically a negative thought will sneak in. But if I choose to have that sweet, I tell myself it is okay and savor it! Principle 4: Challenge the Food Police in "Intuitive Eating" has been very helpful. Also when I do eat a formerly 'negative' food, I try to eat it in a more mindful manner, paying attention to my satiety signals and how my stomach feels. In giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I've made a pleasant discover that those sweets I used to binge on has lost some of their allure. > > You know, if you give yourself permission to eat and enjoy that Pop Tart, probably that one will make you feel satisfied and do more in the way of helping you reach your weight loss/fitness goals because you're not depriving yourself. Hope this helps in some way! Good luck and don't give up!> > All the best,> Jeanne>

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