Re: I

[Guest guest]

I have been wanting to read that book, but haven't found it in any of our libraries yet. I'll probably have to order it. Dave Ramsey recommends it all the time on his radio show.

Rhonda

From: Tana Havlan

Sent: Tuesday, June 29, 2010 2:41 PM

To: IntuitiveEating_Support

Subject: I

Hi McKella,

I have a husband who is a diet master, and I am a codependant so it can be very, very, very challenging for me to have boundaries with him. Sometimes I get that "if you can't beat em join em" attitude that you got last night and I end up miserable because I wasn't able to respect what I needed in that moment. Have you considered finding a therapist that can help you set boundaries? Or find a support group that can help you? I am reading a book right now called "Boundaries: When to say yes and how to say no" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. Townsend. It is a LIFE SAVER!!! It has so much valuable information in it, it puts into words things I have been experiencing and feeling for my entire life. Here is a quote from page 216, "The overweight person feels enormous self-hate and shame about her condition. And, like others who suffer from out-of-control behaviors, the overweight person feels overwhelming shame for her behavior, which drives her away from relationship and back to food.

Both chronic and bingeing overeaters suffer from an internal self-boundary problem. For overeaters, food serves as a false boundary. They might use food to avoid intimacy by gaining weight and becoming less attractive. Or they might binge as a way to get false closeness. For bingers, the "comfort" from food is less scary than the prospect of real relationships, where boundaries would be necessary."

This may or may not describe you (and/or your husband) but it describes me to a T.

Hope this was helpfull,

Tana

[Guest guest]

I LOVE THIS BOOK! IT IS LIFE-CHANGING!!!!!!

Blessings!

I have been wanting to read that book, but haven't found it in any of our

libraries yet. I'll probably have to order it. Dave Ramsey recommends it all the

time on his radio show. Rhonda

> From: Tana Havlan

I am reading a book right now called " Boundaries: When to say yes and how to say

no " by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. Townsend. It is a LIFE SAVER!!! Tana

[Guest guest]

Thank-you Tai... that is a good way to look at it and I will work on changing my focus. To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Tue, July 6, 2010 6:59:50 AMSubject: I

,I understand your urges to check the scale. I've avoided getting on it since I'm terribly worried about weight gain and I know that if the scale goes up everything else about me seems to go down in my mind. I'm working hard to remember that the size of clothes or the number on the scale is not a representation of who I am as a person or what I contribute to my work, relationships, and the overall satisfaction of my life. Keep up the good work!!Tai

[Guest guest]

Thanks. I must have been looking at the first printing or something because I found it on Amazon for under 15. Maybe I had the author wrong. Thank you Tana

Norma

-- I

Hello Norma,

Welcome, I've noticed that others have told you already that you can find the book much cheaper than $60. Make sure you are looking for the right book, Intuitive Eating by Tribole and Elyse Resch. Glad you are here.

Tana