Re: Why do I let it hurt so much EVEN NOW?

[Guest guest]

Wow. This sounds so familiar. I can completely relate to what you went

through. When 9/11 happened, I was in the hospital with my youngest son who was

2 and had had foot surgery. My mother called me, yelling, " GET THE HELL OUT OF

THAT HOSPITAL!! THERE'S ANOTHER PLANE AND THERE ARE REPORTS IT MIGHT BE HEADED

FOR ATLANTA! " This is just what I needed. My baby had pins in his feet and had

been out of surgery less than 24 hours and I'm a mile from the CDC. I have no

idea what she's talking about. She was in complete panic mode. But just like

your mother, it was all about her worries and concerns and veiled with " I'm so

worried about YOU. " She's not worried about me, she's worried for herself.

Re: Why do I let it hurt so much EVEN NOW?

*Do you ever feel permanently stained by this life? As if there is something

missing so great that you can never get it back*

Yes Yes Yes.

I feel emotional and physical pain whenever I am confronted with such

comments. In some cases I know that the person only means well and doesn't

know of my past. It still hurts. I feel that I have missed and will never

have the beautiful relationship that is the basis for them to feel

differently from me.

Whenever I am told that a mothers love is unconditional or that I should

seek advice from nada for life's decisions I flash back to a day in high

school. It was September 11th 2001. I spent all day after the news in

class after class with intelligent discussions of the events and appropriate

sadness from all. I felt for once in my life that I was sharing normal

grief with normal people. Towards the end of the day there was nada in the

doorway to my class. She was crying and said she had come to take me home

due to the events. I immediately begged to stay in school. A classmate

spoke up " she's you mother and she's worried about you, go with her,she

loves you " . I had no way then to convey how wrong that statement was. I

wanted to somehow tell him that if I went it would be for an all about her

pity and paranoia party.

Of course it was. I was taken home to listen to her cry about how worried

she was and poor her and how she couldn't handle the thought that something

would happen to me. I was angry and hurt and told her that the terrorists

were not going to attack a school with less than 600 students, that she had

no concern for my feelings, and that she had no understanding of what

happened today. I called her crazy, she called me ungrateful and mean.

[Guest guest]

Wow. This sounds so familiar. I can completely relate to what you went

through. When 9/11 happened, I was in the hospital with my youngest son who was

2 and had had foot surgery. My mother called me, yelling, " GET THE HELL OUT OF

THAT HOSPITAL!! THERE'S ANOTHER PLANE AND THERE ARE REPORTS IT MIGHT BE HEADED

FOR ATLANTA! " This is just what I needed. My baby had pins in his feet and had

been out of surgery less than 24 hours and I'm a mile from the CDC. I have no

idea what she's talking about. She was in complete panic mode. But just like

your mother, it was all about her worries and concerns and veiled with " I'm so

worried about YOU. " She's not worried about me, she's worried for herself.

Re: Why do I let it hurt so much EVEN NOW?

*Do you ever feel permanently stained by this life? As if there is something

missing so great that you can never get it back*

Yes Yes Yes.

I feel emotional and physical pain whenever I am confronted with such

comments. In some cases I know that the person only means well and doesn't

know of my past. It still hurts. I feel that I have missed and will never

have the beautiful relationship that is the basis for them to feel

differently from me.

Whenever I am told that a mothers love is unconditional or that I should

seek advice from nada for life's decisions I flash back to a day in high

school. It was September 11th 2001. I spent all day after the news in

class after class with intelligent discussions of the events and appropriate

sadness from all. I felt for once in my life that I was sharing normal

grief with normal people. Towards the end of the day there was nada in the

doorway to my class. She was crying and said she had come to take me home

due to the events. I immediately begged to stay in school. A classmate

spoke up " she's you mother and she's worried about you, go with her,she

loves you " . I had no way then to convey how wrong that statement was. I

wanted to somehow tell him that if I went it would be for an all about her

pity and paranoia party.

Of course it was. I was taken home to listen to her cry about how worried

she was and poor her and how she couldn't handle the thought that something

would happen to me. I was angry and hurt and told her that the terrorists

were not going to attack a school with less than 600 students, that she had

no concern for my feelings, and that she had no understanding of what

happened today. I called her crazy, she called me ungrateful and mean.

[Guest guest]

Wow. This sounds so familiar. I can completely relate to what you went

through. When 9/11 happened, I was in the hospital with my youngest son who was

2 and had had foot surgery. My mother called me, yelling, " GET THE HELL OUT OF

THAT HOSPITAL!! THERE'S ANOTHER PLANE AND THERE ARE REPORTS IT MIGHT BE HEADED

FOR ATLANTA! " This is just what I needed. My baby had pins in his feet and had

been out of surgery less than 24 hours and I'm a mile from the CDC. I have no

idea what she's talking about. She was in complete panic mode. But just like

your mother, it was all about her worries and concerns and veiled with " I'm so

worried about YOU. " She's not worried about me, she's worried for herself.

Re: Why do I let it hurt so much EVEN NOW?

*Do you ever feel permanently stained by this life? As if there is something

missing so great that you can never get it back*

Yes Yes Yes.

I feel emotional and physical pain whenever I am confronted with such

comments. In some cases I know that the person only means well and doesn't

know of my past. It still hurts. I feel that I have missed and will never

have the beautiful relationship that is the basis for them to feel

differently from me.

Whenever I am told that a mothers love is unconditional or that I should

seek advice from nada for life's decisions I flash back to a day in high

school. It was September 11th 2001. I spent all day after the news in

class after class with intelligent discussions of the events and appropriate

sadness from all. I felt for once in my life that I was sharing normal

grief with normal people. Towards the end of the day there was nada in the

doorway to my class. She was crying and said she had come to take me home

due to the events. I immediately begged to stay in school. A classmate

spoke up " she's you mother and she's worried about you, go with her,she

loves you " . I had no way then to convey how wrong that statement was. I

wanted to somehow tell him that if I went it would be for an all about her

pity and paranoia party.

Of course it was. I was taken home to listen to her cry about how worried

she was and poor her and how she couldn't handle the thought that something

would happen to me. I was angry and hurt and told her that the terrorists

were not going to attack a school with less than 600 students, that she had

no concern for my feelings, and that she had no understanding of what

happened today. I called her crazy, she called me ungrateful and mean.