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lol....I think the innappropriateness of that gift speaks for itself, actually.

thank goodness, upon first sight of it the school people knew they were dealing

with a lunatic.

>

> I have to share this one with people who will get it, and might even have a

good laugh.

>

> So, I've been NC with nada and (dishrag) dad for over a year. I have two

kids, and my nada keeps trying all sorts of strange ways to get some sort of

contact from them. My kids now understand why we are NC (my parents hurt us

financially last year and cut off payment for my daughter's school tuition

because we were going to shorten our visit to them by half a day - some of you

may remember the story).

>

> Anyhow, my oldest daughter just celebrated her 10th birthday! A few weeks

before her birthday, my dad (who does ALL nada's dirty work) emailed me saying

" they would like to re-establish a relationship " with me. Well, being NC, I

didn't respond. He then started emailing me asking me what he could do to make

my daughter's birthday " special " . OH, the responses I wanted to send were WAY

too numerous and humorous, but following the NC rule, I didn't respond. Another

email, asking what my daughter wanted for her birthday and stating " We are also

eager to hear your suggestions as to how we might go about resuming our

relationship. " After talking it over with my therapist, I decided I was strong

enough to send them a 1-sentence reply: " Sorry, I am not ready to re-establish a

relationship at this time. " End of discussion.

>

> So, on my daughter's 10th birthday, a large fruit basket was delivered to my

house. My daughter was all excited because it had a " happy birthday " balloon

attached to it. When we opened the card and discovered it was from my parents,

it was too late to throw it in the trash (she was already eating an apple). So

naturally, my daughter knows that when someone sends you a gift, you send them a

thank-you note. So she sent them a very nice, very benign thank you note, and

that was it.

>

> Think the story ends there? Of course not!

>

> My other daughter just started 2nd grade last week. On the second day of

school, her teacher calls me (right after school) to tell me that " a lovely and

very large fruit basket " was delivered to the school for my daughter and was

sitting in the school office! The card says it is from her grandparents and

that she is supposed to share it with her class. It also has a very large

balloon attached to it that says " miss you " . The teacher was a bit puzzled and

asked if she should cut up the fruit and make a fruit salad? After I briefly

explained to her the in-appropriateness of the gift, and that there were some

issues with my parents, I quickly drove over to the school and picked the damn

thing up. My daughter never saw it (she was at her friends' house when it was

delivered after school). After contemplating the idea of letting the fruit rot

for a few weeks, then shipping it back to nada in a box, I ended up anonymously

leaving the fruit back to the staff lounge at my daughter's school the next day.

I hope they enjoyed it. No thank you note this time.

>

> Who the heck sends a 10-year-old a fruit basket for their birthday???? And

who the f#@* sends a 7 year old a fruit basket at school????

>

> Nadas do, of course :-)

>

> *sigh*

> -

>

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IF it's any consolation, my Nada used to FOR EVERY HOLIDAY send me flowers and

stuffed animals at high school... every holiday, or sometimmes just because.

Back then you had to pick them up and take them to class with you where I'd sit

with these flowers and balloons and animals on my desks all day. It became a

running joke with my friends. Eventually the office lady realized there was a

problem and wouldn't call me til last period so I could pick them up after

school.

Up until I was 28, Nada would send me boxes of frosted cookies with my friends

names on them.... again... notice the age. She tried to do this last year when

I finally said, " mom... I'm 41.... STOP!!! "

Lynnette - who likes fruit.

>

> I have to share this one with people who will get it, and might even have a

good laugh.

>

> So, I've been NC with nada and (dishrag) dad for over a year. I have two

kids, and my nada keeps trying all sorts of strange ways to get some sort of

contact from them. My kids now understand why we are NC (my parents hurt us

financially last year and cut off payment for my daughter's school tuition

because we were going to shorten our visit to them by half a day - some of you

may remember the story).

>

> Anyhow, my oldest daughter just celebrated her 10th birthday! A few weeks

before her birthday, my dad (who does ALL nada's dirty work) emailed me saying

" they would like to re-establish a relationship " with me. Well, being NC, I

didn't respond. He then started emailing me asking me what he could do to make

my daughter's birthday " special " . OH, the responses I wanted to send were WAY

too numerous and humorous, but following the NC rule, I didn't respond. Another

email, asking what my daughter wanted for her birthday and stating " We are also

eager to hear your suggestions as to how we might go about resuming our

relationship. " After talking it over with my therapist, I decided I was strong

enough to send them a 1-sentence reply: " Sorry, I am not ready to re-establish a

relationship at this time. " End of discussion.

>

> So, on my daughter's 10th birthday, a large fruit basket was delivered to my

house. My daughter was all excited because it had a " happy birthday " balloon

attached to it. When we opened the card and discovered it was from my parents,

it was too late to throw it in the trash (she was already eating an apple). So

naturally, my daughter knows that when someone sends you a gift, you send them a

thank-you note. So she sent them a very nice, very benign thank you note, and

that was it.

>

> Think the story ends there? Of course not!

>

> My other daughter just started 2nd grade last week. On the second day of

school, her teacher calls me (right after school) to tell me that " a lovely and

very large fruit basket " was delivered to the school for my daughter and was

sitting in the school office! The card says it is from her grandparents and

that she is supposed to share it with her class. It also has a very large

balloon attached to it that says " miss you " . The teacher was a bit puzzled and

asked if she should cut up the fruit and make a fruit salad? After I briefly

explained to her the in-appropriateness of the gift, and that there were some

issues with my parents, I quickly drove over to the school and picked the damn

thing up. My daughter never saw it (she was at her friends' house when it was

delivered after school). After contemplating the idea of letting the fruit rot

for a few weeks, then shipping it back to nada in a box, I ended up anonymously

leaving the fruit back to the staff lounge at my daughter's school the next day.

I hope they enjoyed it. No thank you note this time.

>

> Who the heck sends a 10-year-old a fruit basket for their birthday???? And

who the f#@* sends a 7 year old a fruit basket at school????

>

> Nadas do, of course :-)

>

> *sigh*

> -

>

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LOL! I love the Terminator analogy! Its SO TRUE!!

My 10-year-old daughter actually saw the 2nd fruit basket in the car and said to

me: " ANOTHER fruit basket, mom? Maybe I should not have sent that thank you

note! " She totally gets it :-)

-

> >

> > I have to share this one with people who will get it, and might even have a

good laugh.

> >

> > So, I've been NC with nada and (dishrag) dad for over a year. I have two

kids, and my nada keeps trying all sorts of strange ways to get some sort of

contact from them. My kids now understand why we are NC (my parents hurt us

financially last year and cut off payment for my daughter's school tuition

because we were going to shorten our visit to them by half a day - some of you

may remember the story).

> >

> > Anyhow, my oldest daughter just celebrated her 10th birthday! A few weeks

before her birthday, my dad (who does ALL nada's dirty work) emailed me saying

" they would like to re-establish a relationship " with me. Well, being NC, I

didn't respond. He then started emailing me asking me what he could do to make

my daughter's birthday " special " . OH, the responses I wanted to send were WAY

too numerous and humorous, but following the NC rule, I didn't respond. Another

email, asking what my daughter wanted for her birthday and stating " We are also

eager to hear your suggestions as to how we might go about resuming our

relationship. " After talking it over with my therapist, I decided I was strong

enough to send them a 1-sentence reply: " Sorry, I am not ready to re-establish a

relationship at this time. " End of discussion.

> >

> > So, on my daughter's 10th birthday, a large fruit basket was delivered to my

house. My daughter was all excited because it had a " happy birthday " balloon

attached to it. When we opened the card and discovered it was from my parents,

it was too late to throw it in the trash (she was already eating an apple). So

naturally, my daughter knows that when someone sends you a gift, you send them a

thank-you note. So she sent them a very nice, very benign thank you note, and

that was it.

> >

> > Think the story ends there? Of course not!

> >

> > My other daughter just started 2nd grade last week. On the second day of

school, her teacher calls me (right after school) to tell me that " a lovely and

very large fruit basket " was delivered to the school for my daughter and was

sitting in the school office! The card says it is from her grandparents and

that she is supposed to share it with her class. It also has a very large

balloon attached to it that says " miss you " . The teacher was a bit puzzled and

asked if she should cut up the fruit and make a fruit salad? After I briefly

explained to her the in-appropriateness of the gift, and that there were some

issues with my parents, I quickly drove over to the school and picked the damn

thing up. My daughter never saw it (she was at her friends' house when it was

delivered after school). After contemplating the idea of letting the fruit rot

for a few weeks, then shipping it back to nada in a box, I ended up anonymously

leaving the fruit back to the staff lounge at my daughter's school the next day.

I hope they enjoyed it. No thank you note this time.

> >

> > Who the heck sends a 10-year-old a fruit basket for their birthday???? And

who the f#@* sends a 7 year old a fruit basket at school????

> >

> > Nadas do, of course :-)

> >

> > *sigh*

> > -

> >

>

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For my last two birthdays (both of which I tried to keep under wraps from all

but my closest friends and Nada), Nada sent me a bunch of balloons... the shiny

tinfoil kind that crackle in the wind. Because of the way the post office works,

I get a special message from the post office (one year they kept telling me I

had a special package *wink* when I saw them around campus on the rounds before

I had a chance to pick the balloons up); one year they called my boss and told

her to tell me to pick them up. The post office isfar away from any of the

on-campus residences (which Nada knows), so I would have to walk across campus

with a big mass of balloons. In fact, I specifically said to her last year,

" just *don't* send the balloons please. " I recognize that I'm lucky and

privileged to recieve these gifts, but I'd much rather she not get me the

balloons and, oh I don't know, make rent payments on time.

Also, since I started middle school, my nada had a thing about lingerie. FOr

years I wasn't allowed to wear a bra, but she always tried to squeeze me into

fishnets and corsets. I had to have another chat with her about that when she

sent me lacy thongs and a fishnet bodysuit with faux-leather " punk " -style garter

buckle things. Keep in mind that I'm not exactly " sexually adventurous " and my

wardrobe followed a religious dresscode (by choice): skirts that cover the knees

and tops that cover my collarbone and elbows.

Argh... I could never say " Hey, thanks, but no thanks " because the stuff was

already payed for and I was in a different state. I tried to have the " I really

appreciate all the things you send me and I know how lucky I am that you think

of this, but if we're tight on money, maybe you could let me know BEFORE you buy

something, so if it's something I can't/won't use (pasta cookers to high heels),

you don't have to spend that money " conversation, but wither she'd get terribly

mad or she'd ignore it.

Wow... I had a lot more to say than I expected... sorry guys >.<

-Frances

> >

> > I have to share this one with people who will get it, and might even have a

good laugh.

> >

> > So, I've been NC with nada and (dishrag) dad for over a year. I have two

kids, and my nada keeps trying all sorts of strange ways to get some sort of

contact from them. My kids now understand why we are NC (my parents hurt us

financially last year and cut off payment for my daughter's school tuition

because we were going to shorten our visit to them by half a day - some of you

may remember the story).

> >

> > Anyhow, my oldest daughter just celebrated her 10th birthday! A few weeks

before her birthday, my dad (who does ALL nada's dirty work) emailed me saying

" they would like to re-establish a relationship " with me. Well, being NC, I

didn't respond. He then started emailing me asking me what he could do to make

my daughter's birthday " special " . OH, the responses I wanted to send were WAY

too numerous and humorous, but following the NC rule, I didn't respond. Another

email, asking what my daughter wanted for her birthday and stating " We are also

eager to hear your suggestions as to how we might go about resuming our

relationship. " After talking it over with my therapist, I decided I was strong

enough to send them a 1-sentence reply: " Sorry, I am not ready to re-establish a

relationship at this time. " End of discussion.

> >

> > So, on my daughter's 10th birthday, a large fruit basket was delivered to my

house. My daughter was all excited because it had a " happy birthday " balloon

attached to it. When we opened the card and discovered it was from my parents,

it was too late to throw it in the trash (she was already eating an apple). So

naturally, my daughter knows that when someone sends you a gift, you send them a

thank-you note. So she sent them a very nice, very benign thank you note, and

that was it.

> >

> > Think the story ends there? Of course not!

> >

> > My other daughter just started 2nd grade last week. On the second day of

school, her teacher calls me (right after school) to tell me that " a lovely and

very large fruit basket " was delivered to the school for my daughter and was

sitting in the school office! The card says it is from her grandparents and

that she is supposed to share it with her class. It also has a very large

balloon attached to it that says " miss you " . The teacher was a bit puzzled and

asked if she should cut up the fruit and make a fruit salad? After I briefly

explained to her the in-appropriateness of the gift, and that there were some

issues with my parents, I quickly drove over to the school and picked the damn

thing up. My daughter never saw it (she was at her friends' house when it was

delivered after school). After contemplating the idea of letting the fruit rot

for a few weeks, then shipping it back to nada in a box, I ended up anonymously

leaving the fruit back to the staff lounge at my daughter's school the next day.

I hope they enjoyed it. No thank you note this time.

> >

> > Who the heck sends a 10-year-old a fruit basket for their birthday???? And

who the f#@* sends a 7 year old a fruit basket at school????

> >

> > Nadas do, of course :-)

> >

> > *sigh*

> > -

> >

>

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yeah, it's beyond weird. i am thinking that it has to be one of two

things...it's something she got free through a company, or it's just a gift that

screams " I am just doing this to show the adults that end up eating this how

terrible it is that I don't get to see my grandchildren. " With a gift like that

no one will wonder why.

> > >

> > > I have to share this one with people who will get it, and might even have

> > a good laugh.

> > >

> > > So, I've been NC with nada and (dishrag) dad for over a year. I have two

> > kids, and my nada keeps trying all sorts of strange ways to get some sort of

> > contact from them. My kids now understand why we are NC (my parents hurt us

> > financially last year and cut off payment for my daughter's school tuition

> > because we were going to shorten our visit to them by half a day - some of

> > you may remember the story).

> > >

> > > Anyhow, my oldest daughter just celebrated her 10th birthday! A few weeks

> > before her birthday, my dad (who does ALL nada's dirty work) emailed me

> > saying " they would like to re-establish a relationship " with me. Well, being

> > NC, I didn't respond. He then started emailing me asking me what he could do

> > to make my daughter's birthday " special " . OH, the responses I wanted to send

> > were WAY too numerous and humorous, but following the NC rule, I didn't

> > respond. Another email, asking what my daughter wanted for her birthday and

> > stating " We are also eager to hear your suggestions as to how we might go

> > about resuming our relationship. " After talking it over with my therapist, I

> > decided I was strong enough to send them a 1-sentence reply: " Sorry, I am

> > not ready to re-establish a relationship at this time. " End of discussion.

> > >

> > > So, on my daughter's 10th birthday, a large fruit basket was delivered to

> > my house. My daughter was all excited because it had a " happy birthday "

> > balloon attached to it. When we opened the card and discovered it was from

> > my parents, it was too late to throw it in the trash (she was already eating

> > an apple). So naturally, my daughter knows that when someone sends you a

> > gift, you send them a thank-you note. So she sent them a very nice, very

> > benign thank you note, and that was it.

> > >

> > > Think the story ends there? Of course not!

> > >

> > > My other daughter just started 2nd grade last week. On the second day of

> > school, her teacher calls me (right after school) to tell me that " a lovely

> > and very large fruit basket " was delivered to the school for my daughter and

> > was sitting in the school office! The card says it is from her grandparents

> > and that she is supposed to share it with her class. It also has a very

> > large balloon attached to it that says " miss you " . The teacher was a bit

> > puzzled and asked if she should cut up the fruit and make a fruit salad?

> > After I briefly explained to her the in-appropriateness of the gift, and

> > that there were some issues with my parents, I quickly drove over to the

> > school and picked the damn thing up. My daughter never saw it (she was at

> > her friends' house when it was delivered after school). After contemplating

> > the idea of letting the fruit rot for a few weeks, then shipping it back to

> > nada in a box, I ended up anonymously leaving the fruit back to the staff

> > lounge at my daughter's school the next day. I hope they enjoyed it. No

> > thank you note this time.

> > >

> > > Who the heck sends a 10-year-old a fruit basket for their birthday????

> > And who the f#@* sends a 7 year old a fruit basket at school????

> > >

> > > Nadas do, of course :-)

> > >

> > > *sigh*

> > > -

> > >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>

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