Re: I did it again / update

[Guest guest]

thanks for the response. i deleted that post because I feel like I am getting on

everyone's nerves with this drama.

SIL came back a day later. she's asked if they can stay until they get their

house sold. it needs alot of repairs before being put on the market so that

could be a couple of years.

it's the best situation for the two year old but it would have been a perfect

oppty for fada/nada to lay down some conditions like: clean, keep the kids

bathed and clean regularly/no more expecting babysitting all day long/ and no

more threatening anyone in this house.

instead they just said 'sure no prob' and fada is acting like *I* am the bad guy

and scapegoat, and he has been buddy-buddy with wos all day for the past couple

days. it's pretty much unforgiveable. I am just detached and trying to stay

detached.

>

> >

> >

> > I set myself up to fight a battle for my mother, saying everything to SIL

> > that they were too cowardly to say themselves.

> >

> > The upshot is that SIL and my brother came back the very next day and are

> > planning on fixing their house up and selling it, so they could be here for

> > years. After that confrontation, I have somehow ended up being the bad guy,

> > AS USUAL. I feel like an idiot.

> >

> > Does anyone else have this problem...being the one that stands up and calls

> > b.s. on a situation when everyone else is just going along and pretending

> > not to notice? And then having people who should be grateful to you for

> > speaking the truth end up not only not caring but twisting things around and

> > ostracizing you for not being willing to 'just go along' with things in a

> > bullsh*t situation? Is this a thing in families with BPD people? i am so

> > confuse

> >

> > I just went in there and talked to fada and he said some really nasty

> > things to me and I am very hurt. He is twisting things like I am 'causing

> > drama' when I confronted SIL about trashing my parents house and mistreating

> > and neglecting her kids, hitting them too hard and not keeping them clean.

> >

> > Here is an example of what I mean: nada knows to the day when the last time

> > the babies have had a bath. She told me the other day that the older one's

> > last bath was a month ago. (I take him out and we play in a little pool in

> > the back yard and he loves to play with the hose and run the water over his

> > head so really doesn't 'look' dirty.) However, the younger one has fine hair

> > that is oily and always looks greasy. Plus he stays in there with her and

> > crawls around on the never vaccumed carpet, leaving his legs and feet

> > covered with dirt, just from being inside/not outside. But last night SIL

> > said right in front of nada that she'd 'like for matthew's hair to be

> > cleaner but it just gets dirty too fast, even though she washes it all the

> > time'. And Nada SAT THERE AND AGREED WITH HER AND HO-HUMMED ABOUT IT!

> > Although she is constantly commenting on it and saying how long it's been

> > since it's been washed, etc, etc, etc, to me behind SIL's back. So she let

> > ME confront her though in all honesty she is the one that first brought it

> > to my attention and harps about it constantly. So I feel like I got played

> > for a chump by her again.

> >

> > I know I did the right thing confronting SIL about her stuff with the kids

> > but I am so angry about the way things get twisted and misrepresented. And

> > no one has my back. And they just...gah, I could go on and on and on. I

> > mean, I stood up to her and almost took a punch in the face for these kids,

> > and nobody so much as nods in my direction. Which is not why I did it, but I

> > just do not understand these people.

> >

> > I love the kids and they are worth standing up for but everyone else in

> > that house can literally drop dead at this point. I really put myself on the

> > line, for nothing. CPS won't help me because this is a bpd distortion

> > campaign against her painted black child, which they clearly don't 'get' or

> > understand.

> >

> > SIL just went off and left both kids with my dad to go see a contracter,

> > which she has been told explicitly NOT to do under any circumstances.

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>