Guest guest Posted March 3, 2011 Report Share Posted March 3, 2011 Hi, . I feel very sympathetic - you're having a rough time. It does sound a bit like IE feels depriving to you, so here's my best suggestion for the moment: could you try saying to yourself something like, "I'm eating now to soothe myself because I'm having a hard time in my life and so far I haven't figured out some better ways of easing my distress, but as long as I'm eating to soothe myself, I'm going to make sure I give myself full permission to do it, and also that I do it in such a way that gets me the maximum satisfaction from the food." What that would mean is overeating only on the foods you really want at that moment, and deciding for yourself what level of fullness feels good in your body, and perhaps even eating in the most pleasant atmosphere and pace you can manage - not to make yourself eat LESS, just to make it more pleasurable so that it has the maximum soothing value. Meanwhile, you might think about whether there are some ways you can get some help with the difficult things in your life. Hope this is helpful. Best of luck to you. April Hello! My name is . Last spring I discovered Intuitive Eating and joined this group. I haven't posted for a long time, but I always read the recent posts here.I want to say that the concept of Intuitive Eating radically has changed my life. I was struggling so much from depression over my recent divorce and the stress of being a single mom and the binge/self hatred/starve cycle had become just another hopeless part of my life. I realized that this cycle was actually making my depression worse and keeping me from getting to better places emotionally. It took a few months but by the end of summer IE was helping me be happier where I was and who I was - which is the goal of this in my opinion. Food lost its power over me. I kept chocolate bars in my freezer and actually forgot they were there! Best of all, for the first time in my life I got into an exercise routine that I stuck to. I did yoga nearly daily not to lose weight but because it made me feel amazing. I focused on how things made me feel and I learned to stop eating when I was full. I did lose weight but didn't know it since I had thrown out my scale, but I shouldn't have been surprised since the weekly (or more) nights of my massive binging had stopped. It kinda felt like a miracle since I had struggled with eating disorders my whole life. I absolutely believe in IE.However....Past few months, I've lost my focus. It's like I've had a relapse. Not sure the reason - my dad being hospitalized repeatedly since December, losing a friend, serious money stress, being snowed in, just the Winter blues. My yoga stopped. My binging returned. I've spiraled down. This week, I've had drama with my ex husband and numbed the emotions with large and I mean LARGE amounts of food. I feel the panic that "better eat while you can because soon I'll be doing that IE thing again" As if IE is a diet!!!! My pants are getting tight. I just want to eat and sleep. I am back to my depressive tendencies. I am criticizing myself...Can any of you relate to relapsing like this? I even have reread the IE main points. Should I read the whole thing again? Read other books? Should I just focus on getting back into yoga and the food will follow? I can't seem to stop when I am full now. I simply do not want to stop eating. I've become a rebel.I know I believe in IE what I am lacking now is my resolve. Like I need to hit that "wall" of being done with these destructive habits all over again... but I want to correct this now! Any help would be appreciated!!!Wishing you all the best ~ ------------------------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 3, 2011 Report Share Posted March 3, 2011 Thank you for the replies! I think I have forgotten to be gentle with myself or I thought I was but really I haven't been. April, you are correct that I am viewing IE as a form of deprivation which is exactly what it is not. I have to get back to reminding myself and I'm going to use the line you wrote out to give myself permission. Casey, that link to the 15 min method is great. I bookmarked it! I'm going to put that into practice probably even tonight. I know that with all that is going on in my life it feels like it is more efficient to keep eating and survive then to stop and feel. In the long run, that's not worth it. I think since IE did end up getting my weight down without my actual trying, now suddenly I am terrified of gaining it back. Terrified enough that the self criticism is coming on strong when I fail and the old cycles are back. I need to get that out of my mind like I had done before. I think I had been getting a bit too confident because IE was just so natural for a time. There will probably be many times when I will need to refresh myself to these concepts. You were all so kind and helpful. Thank you! > > Hi, . > I feel very sympathetic - you're having a rough time. > It does sound a bit like IE feels depriving to you, so here's my best > suggestion for the moment: could you try saying to yourself something like, > " I'm eating now to soothe myself because I'm having a hard time in my life and > so far I haven't figured out some better ways of easing my distress, but as > long as I'm eating to soothe myself, I'm going to make sure I give myself > full permission to do it, and also that I do it in such a way that gets me > the maximum satisfaction from the food. " > What that would mean is overeating only on the foods you really want at > that moment, and deciding for yourself what level of fullness feels good > in your body, and perhaps even eating in the most pleasant atmosphere and > pace you can manage - not to make yourself eat LESS, just to make it more > pleasurable so that it has the maximum soothing value. Meanwhile, you might > think about whether there are some ways you can get some help with the > difficult things in your life. > Hope this is helpful. Best of luck to you. > April > > > In a message dated 3/3/2011 2:20:42 P.M. Eastern Standard Time, > rhystzara@... writes: > > > Hello! My name is . Last spring I discovered Intuitive Eating and > joined this group. I haven't posted for a long time, but I always read the > recent posts here. > > I want to say that the concept of Intuitive Eating radically has changed > my life. I was struggling so much from depression over my recent divorce > and the stress of being a single mom and the binge/self hatred/starve cycle > had become just another hopeless part of my life. I realized that this > cycle was actually making my depression worse and keeping me from getting to > better places emotionally. > > It took a few months but by the end of summer IE was helping me be happier > where I was and who I was - which is the goal of this in my opinion. Food > lost its power over me. I kept chocolate bars in my freezer and actually > forgot they were there! Best of all, for the first time in my life I got > into an exercise routine that I stuck to. I did yoga nearly daily not to > lose weight but because it made me feel amazing. I focused on how things > made me feel and I learned to stop eating when I was full. I did lose weight > but didn't know it since I had thrown out my scale, but I shouldn't have > been surprised since the weekly (or more) nights of my massive binging had > stopped. It kinda felt like a miracle since I had struggled with eating > disorders my whole life. I absolutely believe in IE. > > However....Past few months, I've lost my focus. It's like I've had a > relapse. Not sure the reason - my dad being hospitalized repeatedly since > December, losing a friend, serious money stress, being snowed in, just the > Winter blues. My yoga stopped. My binging returned. I've spiraled down. > This week, I've had drama with my ex husband and numbed the emotions with > large and I mean LARGE amounts of food. I feel the panic that " better eat > while you can because soon I'll be doing that IE thing again " As if IE is a > diet!!!! My pants are getting tight. I just want to eat and sleep. I > am back to my depressive tendencies. I am criticizing myself... > > Can any of you relate to relapsing like this? I even have reread the IE > main points. Should I read the whole thing again? Read other books? > Should I just focus on getting back into yoga and the food will follow? I can't > seem to stop when I am full now. I simply do not want to stop eating. > I've become a rebel. > > I know I believe in IE what I am lacking now is my resolve. Like I need > to hit that " wall " of being done with these destructive habits all over > again... but I want to correct this now! Any help would be appreciated!!! > > Wishing you all the best ~ > > > > ------------------------------------ > > Yahoo! Groups Links > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 3, 2011 Report Share Posted March 3, 2011 One of the things I did (and need to do again) is jot down notes while I was eating. It was the only thing that kept my mind on the food and meal itself and not letting my mind go everywhere. I wrote down the color of the food, smell, taste, texture, pleasure(YUM), and anything else I could think of. It also slowed me down, something I was having a hard time doing. I knew I ate fast but was not aware of how fast and without even paying attention to the process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 4, 2011 Report Share Posted March 4, 2011 Excellent post ! Eating fast has been one of my challenges too. Katcha IEing since March 2007 > > One of the things I did (and need to do again) is jot down notes while I was > eating. It was the only thing that kept my mind on the food and meal itself > and not letting my mind go everywhere. I wrote down the color of the food, > smell, taste, texture, pleasure(YUM), and anything else I could think of. > It also slowed me down, something I was having a hard time doing. I knew I > ate fast but was not aware of how fast and without even paying attention to > the process. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 4, 2011 Report Share Posted March 4, 2011 , my own IE journey has had a few U-turns in it as well as peaks and valleys. When I feel 'lost' I remind myself that what I am doing is going towards my IE GPS setting - which is really the point I was 'set' at when I began eating - for my body's needs. Logic would say that I should 'go' in a straight line towards that point, but its more like walking the Himalayas - many ups, downs and walk-arounds not to mention resting stops too. What I have learned from this group is that IE can be practiced a la dieting. And when one makes a RULE out of 'eat only to full' its way like 'eating only enough' as in limiting. And we all know the last step of dieting - REGAIN! Following an 'IE' diet isn't an exception either. Good to read that you are recognizing you need to add more kind-to-self at this moment. That is a very good 'deep breath' thing to do. This last week I ate my way through a large bag of Snickers that I got on sale. I caught myself being disgusted and admonishing myself for this. Then I remembered its a too typical reaction to not having this food choice ALWAYS at hand (a la legalizing and stocking up). By not having this (previous) 'bad' food sitting there I had returned it to the 'forbidden' status. In the end I found that I didn't want any more when it was gone and I am content with saying 'this too will pass'. Keep up the good work and looking forward to reading more posts from you too. Katcha IEing since March 2007 > > > Hello! My name is . Last spring I discovered Intuitive Eating and joined this group. I haven't posted for a long time, but I always read the recent posts here. > > I want to say that the concept of Intuitive Eating radically has changed my life. I was struggling so much from depression over my recent divorce and the stress of being a single mom and the binge/self hatred/starve cycle had become just another hopeless part of my life. I realized that this cycle was actually making my depression worse and keeping me from getting to better places emotionally. > > It took a few months but by the end of summer IE was helping me be happier where I was and who I was - which is the goal of this in my opinion. Food lost its power over me. I kept chocolate bars in my freezer and actually forgot they were there! Best of all, for the first time in my life I got into an exercise routine that I stuck to. I did yoga nearly daily not to lose weight but because it made me feel amazing. I focused on how things made me feel and I learned to stop eating when I was full. I did lose weight but didn't know it since I had thrown out my scale, but I shouldn't have been surprised since the weekly (or more) nights of my massive binging had stopped. It kinda felt like a miracle since I had struggled with eating disorders my whole life. I absolutely believe in IE. > > However....Past few months, I've lost my focus. It's like I've had a relapse. Not sure the reason - my dad being hospitalized repeatedly since December, losing a friend, serious money stress, being snowed in, just the Winter blues. My yoga stopped. My binging returned. I've spiraled down. This week, I've had drama with my ex husband and numbed the emotions with large and I mean LARGE amounts of food. I feel the panic that " better eat while you can because soon I'll be doing that IE thing again " As if IE is a diet!!!! My pants are getting tight. I just want to eat and sleep. I am back to my depressive tendencies. I am criticizing myself... > > Can any of you relate to relapsing like this? I even have reread the IE main points. Should I read the whole thing again? Read other books? Should I just focus on getting back into yoga and the food will follow? I can't seem to stop when I am full now. I simply do not want to stop eating. I've become a rebel. > > I know I believe in IE what I am lacking now is my resolve. Like I need to hit that " wall " of being done with these destructive habits all over again... but I want to correct this now! Any help would be appreciated!!! > > Wishing you all the best ~ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 6, 2011 Report Share Posted March 6, 2011 I agree - I had to tell myself "It's okay that i am eating because I am really stressed out and don't feel good. I can have these hostess cupcakes because they "feel" good to me right now. I can stop and have more if I still feel I "need" them." This was just yesterday. I didn't even feel guilty about eating those cupcakes (which I never buy because they were always on the forbidden list). I ate 2 of them and I felt better (emotionally) and that was that. I've still got the rest of the cupcakes. I found that if I throw out any formerly forbidden food so I won't eat it - then I'm back in the diet mentality and going backwards instead of forwards. It was a huge step for me yesterday to be able to give myself permission to eat those cupcakes. It was such a relief to me. This little relapse really helped me truly feel how the intuitive eating program works. To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Thu, March 3, 2011 2:05:09 PMSubject: Re: Relapse Hi, . I feel very sympathetic - you're having a rough time. It does sound a bit like IE feels depriving to you, so here's my best suggestion for the moment: could you try saying to yourself something like, "I'm eating now to soothe myself because I'm having a hard time in my life and so far I haven't figured out some better ways of easing my distress, but as long as I'm eating to soothe myself, I'm going to make sure I give myself full permission to do it, and also that I do it in such a way that gets me the maximum satisfaction from the food." What that would mean is overeating only on the foods you really want at that moment, and deciding for yourself what level of fullness feels good in your body, and perhaps even eating in the most pleasant atmosphere and pace you can manage - not to make yourself eat LESS, just to make it more pleasurable so that it has the maximum soothing value. Meanwhile, you might think about whether there are some ways you can get some help with the difficult things in your life. Hope this is helpful. Best of luck to you. April Hello! My name is . Last spring I discovered Intuitive Eating and joined this group. I haven't posted for a long time, but I always read the recent posts here.I want to say that the concept of Intuitive Eating radically has changed my life. I was struggling so much from depression over my recent divorce and the stress of being a single mom and the binge/self hatred/starve cycle had become just another hopeless part of my life. I realized that this cycle was actually making my depression worse and keeping me from getting to better places emotionally. It took a few months but by the end of summer IE was helping me be happier where I was and who I was - which is the goal of this in my opinion. Food lost its power over me. I kept chocolate bars in my freezer and actually forgot they were there! Best of all, for the first time in my life I got into an exercise routine that I stuck to. I did yoga nearly daily not to lose weight but because it made me feel amazing. I focused on how things made me feel and I learned to stop eating when I was full. I did lose weight but didn't know it since I had thrown out my scale, but I shouldn't have been surprised since the weekly (or more) nights of my massive binging had stopped. It kinda felt like a miracle since I had struggled with eating disorders my whole life. I absolutely believe in IE.However....Past few months, I've lost my focus. It's like I've had a relapse. Not sure the reason - my dad being hospitalized repeatedly since December, losing a friend, serious money stress, being snowed in, just the Winter blues. My yoga stopped. My binging returned. I've spiraled down. This week, I've had drama with my ex husband and numbed the emotions with large and I mean LARGE amounts of food. I feel the panic that "better eat while you can because soon I'll be doing that IE thing again" As if IE is a diet!!!! My pants are getting tight. I just want to eat and sleep. I am back to my depressive tendencies. I am criticizing myself...Can any of you relate to relapsing like this? I even have reread the IE main points. Should I read the whole thing again? Read other books? Should I just focus on getting back into yoga and the food will follow? I can't seem to stop when I am full now. I simply do not want to stop eating. I've become a rebel.I know I believe in IE what I am lacking now is my resolve. Like I need to hit that "wall" of being done with these destructive habits all over again... but I want to correct this now! Any help would be appreciated!!!Wishing you all the best ~ ------------------------------------ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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