Re: Emotional Eating - reduce anxiety and calming e...

[Guest guest]

Hi, Jen.

What if you were to bring a lot of compassionate awareness to how hard this situation is, and just say Okay, I'm eating sugar/carbs right now in a desperate attempt to soothe myself, and 1) right now it's the best I can do, and 2) I refuse to beat myself up for it or threaten myself with austerity tomorrow, and 3) I will at least try to also ENJOY what I'm eating fully, as fully present and aware of the experience as I can be?. This is advice Elyse Resch gave me and it has helped. I'm still eating emotionally, but less often, and when I do eat I don't also go into I'm-a-failure-and-tomorrow-I'll-make-up-for-it-so-I-might-as-well-eat-until-I'm-sick mode.

The years when my kids were that age were very, very stressful. I also had kids with some special needs. Sugar was the best I could do to cope at times, and frankly, it was a whole lot better than drinking, gambling, or stealing hubcaps! Popping food in your mouth actually DOES make it better for the moment when your nervous system needs relief, even though it also hurts you in the long run. In time, with more awareness and more compassion for yourself, and less beating yourself up, you may also start not wanting to hurt yourself with food.

At least, that's what I'm hoping for me! I've definitely seen some improvement. It seems like the more I am committed to really enjoying my food when I'm hungry the less willing I am to eat food that serves other purposes. Though I must admit that it feels slow, and I'm still eating too much when I do eat, and hardly a vegetable has passed my lips since I started IE. Oh, well.

I have a 3 year old VERY out of control son. He also has some special needs (seizures and is on a special diet - modified atkins for seizures) so I have my hands ful. Some times he drives me INSANE as any little adorable 3 yo boy should! But...there are times when I literally pop food into my mouth b/c I'm anxious and at my wits end with him and for some reason popping food into my mouth (carbs/sugar of course) makes it better!! the good news is that i'm aknowledging i'm doing this and why. Bad news is when it's down to that moment, nothing else will do. I need help in how to deal with this. Can I possibly do something else just as pleasing and quick to replace the food? I can't just get up and leave my son b/c these things usually happen during meal-time and/or medicine time or sometime where I can't physically leave the room and say go do deep breathing or try to relax a little. Or is this a time when maybe I just need food? Maybe I could replace the sugar with something healthy? But I don't want to deprive myself if that's what I need and/or starting labeling foods as good and bad.Any thoughts?Thanks,Jen------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Wow, thanks April. I think I'll print your response out and paste it to my

kitchen cabinet! (above the cookies!!).

Thank you for sympathizing with my situation and for understanding.

I really love this response and will definitely take your advice.

Jen

>

> Hi, Jen.

> What if you were to bring a lot of compassionate awareness to how hard

> this situation is, and just say Okay, I'm eating sugar/carbs right now in a

> desperate attempt to soothe myself, and 1) right now it's the best I can

> do, and 2) I refuse to beat myself up for it or threaten myself with

> austerity tomorrow, and 3) I will at least try to also ENJOY what I'm eating

fully,

> as fully present and aware of the experience as I can be?. This is advice

> Elyse Resch gave me and it has helped. I'm still eating emotionally, but

> less often, and when I do eat I don't also go into

>

I'm-a-failure-and-tomorrow-I'll-make-up-for-it-so-I-might-as-well-eat-until-I'm-\

sick mode.

> The years when my kids were that age were very, very stressful. I also

> had kids with some special needs. Sugar was the best I could do to cope at

> times, and frankly, it was a whole lot better than drinking, gambling, or

> stealing hubcaps! Popping food in your mouth actually DOES make it better for

> the moment when your nervous system needs relief, even though it also

> hurts you in the long run. In time, with more awareness and more compassion

for

> yourself, and less beating yourself up, you may also start not wanting to

> hurt yourself with food.

> At least, that's what I'm hoping for me! I've definitely seen some

> improvement. It seems like the more I am committed to really enjoying my food

> when I'm hungry the less willing I am to eat food that serves other

> purposes. Though I must admit that it feels slow, and I'm still eating too

much

> when I do eat, and hardly a vegetable has passed my lips since I started IE.

> Oh, well.

>

>

> In a message dated 12/28/2010 3:59:32 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,

> jenpullara@... writes:

>

> I have a 3 year old VERY out of control son. He also has some special

> needs (seizures and is on a special diet - modified atkins for seizures) so I

> have my hands ful. Some times he drives me INSANE as any little adorable 3

> yo boy should! But...there are times when I literally pop food into my mouth

> b/c I'm anxious and at my wits end with him and for some reason popping

> food into my mouth (carbs/sugar of course) makes it better!!

>

> the good news is that i'm aknowledging i'm doing this and why. Bad news is

> when it's down to that moment, nothing else will do. I need help in how to

> deal with this. Can I possibly do something else just as pleasing and

> quick to replace the food? I can't just get up and leave my son b/c these

> things usually happen during meal-time and/or medicine time or sometime where

I

> can't physically leave the room and say go do deep breathing or try to

> relax a little.

>

> Or is this a time when maybe I just need food? Maybe I could replace the

> sugar with something healthy? But I don't want to deprive myself if that's

> what I need and/or starting labeling foods as good and bad.

>

> Any thoughts?

>

> Thanks,

> Jen

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

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