Constant Flattery

[Guest guest]

I thought it was narcissistic supply...that she'd lived with narcissists and so

was quick to offer it. I still feel in some cases that is true. But,...

I think I've figured out the constant phoney flattery of my NADA.

She is so intensely in your face with this stuff that it makes you want to throw

up! People love her for it when they don't know her well. They don't realize

that they are hearing the same phoney lines that she spreads over everyone!

They will say how they love my mother.

Now, I'm thinking it's more manipulation. As she does many manipulative things

such as push every " guilt " button you've got over She even sais " how could you

leave your mother " when you are just going to the bathroom.

" Covert-aggressive personalities are adept at charming, praising, flattering or

overtly supporting others in order to get them to lower their defenses and

surrender their trust and loyalty. Covert-aggressives are also particularly

aware that people who are to some extent emotionally needy and dependent (and

that includes most people who aren't character-disordered) want approval,

reassurance, and a sense of being valued and needed more than anything.

Appearing to be attentive to these needs can be a manipulator's ticket to

incredible power over others. Shady " gurus " like Jim and Koresh

seemed to have refined this tactic to an art. In the story of Al and Don, Al is

the consummate seducer. He melts any resistance you might have to giving him

your loyalty and confidence. He does this by giving you what he knows you need

most. He knows you want to feel valued and important. So, he often tells you

that you are. You don't find out how unimportant you really are to him until you

turn out to be in his way. "

I'm so sick of it. She pulls it on me and I can't stand it. Because, I hear

her telling everyone else they are God.

I don't know how to quell it. And now that she is going senile, she just

appears more stupid when she does it. Because, she keeps repeating the same

thing to the same person fifty times and doesn't get it right. lol