Re: still thinking of all of you /Sher and all

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone,

Well, Hospice stopped in today, good timing, I was in so much pain. They had me go back on that patch thingy plus I'm taking my Morphine. She said I was wheezing in both lungs now. She could tell I didn't look good or feel good. She told me she could see a decline in me in just the past month so I don't think it will be too much longer. My lungs hurt, even with the patch and Morphine, I don't wanna hurt anymore. My daughter isnt ready to let go, Gene says he is but then he fights it, he trys to take me places, all over and I feel so weak, I just want to stay in bed. I will say when I take the Morphine, it makes my breathing easier. This may sound silly but I'm trying not to die near anyones birthday. I'm having my aunt from the nursing home come over Sunday, its her birthday. I have guardianship of her but that's being transferred to my daughter next week. How I wish I could just go and not have anybody hurt.

Sometimes I feel so selfish when I think about what Brett, or Steve and Vicky or Peggy or Joyce or anyone is going thru, I shouldn't complain, just a little down I guess. Anyways, enough of that. I hope ya'll know how much comfort you have given me, phone calls, cards, emails, I've saved so much , its all in with my journals. I love you Sher and pray God blesses you......

Love,

Vicky81856 MI IPH/PF COPD 4-06 Congestive Heart Failure 6-08Get the scoop on last night's hottest shows and the live music scene in your area - Check out TourTracker.com!

[Guest guest]

Hi Vicky,

I hope the pain has settled a bit! Enjoy every day and every moment.

God Bless! IrenePF 03/07 Raynaud's Disease 09/07Crohn's Disease 03/95 Asthma 02/92

Re: still thinking of all of you /Sher and all

Hi everyone,

Well, Hospice stopped in today, good timing, I was in so much pain. They had me go back on that patch thingy plus I'm taking my Morphine. She said I was wheezing in both lungs now. She could tell I didn't look good or feel good. She told me she could see a decline in me in just the past month so I don't think it will be too much longer. My lungs hurt, even with the patch and Morphine, I don't wanna hurt anymore. My daughter isnt ready to let go, Gene says he is but then he fights it, he trys to take me places, all over and I feel so weak, I just want to stay in bed. I will say when I take the Morphine, it makes my breathing easier. This may sound silly but I'm trying not to die near anyones birthday. I'm having my aunt from the nursing home come over Sunday, its her birthday. I have guardianship of her but that's being transferred to my daughter next week. How I wish I could just go and not have anybody hurt.

Sometimes I feel so selfish when I think about what Brett, or Steve and Vicky or Peggy or Joyce or anyone is going thru, I shouldn't complain, just a little down I guess. Anyways, enough of that. I hope ya'll know how much comfort you have given me, phone calls, cards, emails, I've saved so much , its all in with my journals. I love you Sher and pray God blesses you......

Love,

Vicky81856 MI IPH/PF COPD 4-06 Congestive Heart Failure 6-08

Get the scoop on last night's hottest shows and the live music scene in your area - Check out TourTracker. com!

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[Guest guest]

Vicky ... have you told Gene you really don't feel like "going places", that you would rather spend your time at home with family? I know, you sweetheart, you just can't bring yourself to say ANYTHING that you think would hurt his feelings and he is doing whatever he can to help you feel "better".

>>>>>>To others who read this, please note Vicky and I have a good relationship, established on and off the board, so what may seem at times blunt to others are things Vicky and I have probably discussed before.

Not wanting to die near anyone's birthday continues to show what a loving person you are. Remember "Let Go"? ...Is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes but to allow others to affect their own destinies.

Hospice is there for your family too. They will be as much help in your transition as family members will allow.

Use your strength for giving and receiving love Vicky, you simply can't do more no matter how much you want to. I wish you peace, everyday.

Your aunt will be ok, your daughter will take good care of her, you already know that.

I'm glad you get some relief from the morphine. I wish I could take it (in the low dose pill form). It really helps but as I've told you, I'm allergic to it! The one pain med that really does work. I'm beginning to wonder if I could tolerate the hives/itching just to get pain relief.

I know, many of us feel "selfish" when we look at other members who are in transition and we are not there yet. Vicky, you too are in transition and you aren't complaining and even if you do, so what? You talk about anything you want to. You are in extreme circumstances and no one thinks you should be "cheerful" all the time.

As always, thank you for sharing this part of your journey. I am privileged to share an extremely personal chapter of your life. I love you too Vicky and I will miss you and our posts to one another. Don't forget to take my penny with you!

MamaSher, age 69. IPF 3-06, OR. NasturtiumsDon't fret about tomorrow, God is already there!

Re: still thinking of all of you /Sher and all

Hi everyone,

Well, Hospice stopped in today, good timing, I was in so much pain. They had me go back on that patch thingy plus I'm taking my Morphine. She said I was wheezing in both lungs now. She could tell I didn't look good or feel good. She told me she could see a decline in me in just the past month so I don't think it will be too much longer. My lungs hurt, even with the patch and Morphine, I don't wanna hurt anymore. My daughter isnt ready to let go, Gene says he is but then he fights it, he trys to take me places, all over and I feel so weak, I just want to stay in bed. I will say when I take the Morphine, it makes my breathing easier. This may sound silly but I'm trying not to die near anyones birthday. I'm having my aunt from the nursing home come over Sunday, its her birthday. I have guardianship of her but that's being transferred to my daughter next week. How I wish I could just go and not have anybody hurt.

Sometimes I feel so selfish when I think about what Brett, or Steve and Vicky or Peggy or Joyce or anyone is going thru, I shouldn't complain, just a little down I guess. Anyways, enough of that. I hope ya'll know how much comfort you have given me, phone calls, cards, emails, I've saved so much , its all in with my journals. I love you Sher and pray God blesses you......

Love,

Vicky81856 MI IPH/PF COPD 4-06 Congestive Heart Failure 6-08

Get the scoop on last night's hottest shows and the live music scene in your area - Check out TourTracker.com!