FW: Barbie series

[Guest guest]

Oldie, but goodie Oldie, but goodie..

Barbie series

1. Bifocals Barbie.

Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors

(half-frames too!), neck chain, and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha

Living.

2. Hot Flash Barbie.

Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops

of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with handheld fan and tiny

tissues.

3.. Facial Hair Barbie.

As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available with

teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.

4. Flabby Arms Barbie.

Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new,roomier-sleeved gowns. Good news

on the tummy front, two-MuMus with tummy-support panels are included.

5. Bunion Barbie.

Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on

Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and

plasters, then slip on soft terry mules.

6. No-More-Wrinkles Barbie.

Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin

Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.

7. Soccer Mom Barbie.

All that experience as a cheerleader is really paying off as Barbie dusts

off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr.. Comes with

minivan in robin-egg blue or white and cooler filled with doughnut holes and

fruit punch.

8. Mid-life Crisis Barbie.

It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo (her personal

trainer) is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're hopping

in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B & B. Includes

a real tape of " Breaking Up Is Hard to Do. "

9. Divorced Barbie.

Sells for$ 199.99. Comes with Ken's house, Ken's Corvette, and Ken's boat.

10. Recovery Barbie.

Too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party girl. Now

she does Twelve Steps instead of dance steps. Clean and sober, she's going

to meetings religiously.. Comes with a little copy of The Big Book and a

six-pack of Diet Coke.

11. Post-Menopausal Barbie.

This Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things,

and cries a lot. She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching

the tube, clicking through the channels. Comes with Depends and Kleenex. As

a bonus this year, the book " Getting In Touch with Your Inner Self " is

included.