Re: no food rules

[Guest guest]

Hi, Barb.

What a wonderfully brave gift to your family! I regret all the food rules I had for my kids during my dieting years while they were growing up. I'm sure it would have been the right thing to do to simply offer them a variety of options and have no rules at all. I'm sure it's scary but I would trust that it will be okay. Looking forward to hearing how it's working over time in your family. Congratulations!

April

Hi All!My counselor suggested this week that I tell my family that as an experiment we will have no food rules in our house. Kids are 16, 11, 9. You would have thought they personally had just won the Super Bowl. The 11 year old immediately got out the ice cream. My anxiety level is off the charts. I didn't realize how scared this would make me. For me on the other hand - I think I will actually eat less and I am excited about that. My father had alot of food rules and I had relaxed them some over the years, but the kids still had to eat at meal times and had to eat something I considered "healthy" (which by the way I still felt guilty about because my dad would not have felt it was good enough). Well now - at least for a while - they can eat whatever they want whenever they want, and I can too. Any thoughts are greatly appreciated.Barb

[Guest guest]

I remember a couple of other moms posting on here about their success with IE and kids.One mom I remember had a child on the autism spectrum who was always begging for sweets. So she instituted one rule, that they had to sit at the table to eat. And lo and behold, the desire for sweets dropped way off. 

So I think that might be one rule that makes sense... and would make sense for me, too, and i'm trying to reinstitute it!... to help them remember only to eat when hungry, without you having to say that.

but otherwise, i think it's great... and just like with adults, will take a while before it evens out and you will see how they will eat normally... expect lots of sweets and snack foods for a while.

 

My kids have been IE since birth. They're 6 and 3.5 years old.

I was lucky to read some kid's nutrition books when my youngest was still an infant. They all recommended as few a food rules as a parent could stand. I was really surprised by this, as all doctors recommend restrict, restrict, restrict. They're really not up on current research.

Anyway, I think I would have been forced into IE, even if I hadn't read these books. My children have never been interested in eating at meal times, will only eat when hungry, and will literally gag and throw up if they see me or my husband eating our food. My 6 year old had widespread food allergies as a baby. I had to go on an elimination diet myself (he nursed), to figure out all his allergies. He wouldn't eat anything but breastmilk until he was well over a year old. He's still very particular about food. He won't touch meat of any kind, or even any kind fruit or veggies other than french fries/tater tots. He eats a pretty big amount of sweets, crackers, cereal, etc. and loads and loads of cheese. My youngest son definitely eats more variety, and loves green beans, carrots, peas, chicken nuggets, etc.

They're both quite healthy, quite tall (97th to 100th percentiles on height), and slender, and strong, and smart, and gorgeous. (I'm not biased or anything.)

Most of the time, I don't worry about their food, but sometimes I have to fight the tendency. I just remember how picky I was a kid, (and how often I was sick), with a Mom that forced me to sit at the table forever, cause I wouldn't eat what she thought I should eat.

So let them live free, I say. They may go a little crazy at first, they may never eat the way you'd like, but they'll be better off in mind and body for it, I really believe.

Sara

[Guest guest]

I know I am a month late responding to this but I just had to tell you our two household food rules :-)

Rule 1: Sit while eating (this was primarily when the kids were younger and I was worried they'd fall and choke...or wrestle and choke..or jump off the couch and choke...)

Rule 2: If you don't complain about the mushrooms, I won't make you eat them!

It's a lot of fun when kids who are used to more rules come to our house and for some reason or another food rules come up and we share these. They are aghast! What? I don't have to clean my plate? I don't have to eat some of everything? You trust me?! Really, the same responses *we* have when we begin IE, right?

Of course, I have gotten in trouble with other parents (including my own as my sister is 20 years younger than I am), for letting them make their own choices. Once I had a group of kids over and they went through two cases of soda. My parents went through the roof. My kid? Drank more soda than was good for him but THEN decided that if he didn't drink some water before he went to bed, he'd feel lousy in the morning. These kids are teens--if we don't let them give themselves a tummyache, how else will they learn what their tummy wants?

Thanks,